Since I began to seriously began to address my different-ness in 2001 the good folks at this site have carried me through crisis after crisis; 5 hospitalizations for mental breakdown, a SRS operation, the loss of my family and everything I cared about in life. I was three days from living on the street before things slowly began to turn around. It took years, 10 of them to finally feel like I really wanted to live again, and that did not begin to happen until early last March.

My sisters, I and others like me know what a horribly hard journey this is, and some of us do not complete it by ether turning around and returning or by going on to the next life. It makes us sad when this later happens and please let me assure you that is not my intention.

I have found new happiness recently and no longer feel the death sadness. I know that some of you will not follow my path but it is mine to walk. You're going to see a huge change in my writing, and I will publish it here if you want me to. Otherwise, I will move on. I was never one of the stars here, but what I wrote was from my heart and for that I am unapologetic.

Some of what I intend to write will simply inflame the passions of some here, so you will probably not see it here on this site. Two different parties have asked for my biography but the way it must be written will not be suitable in this venue. I feel a passion for this new work that I have not felt for what I have written in the past. I will finish my last story, "Katia in Afghanistan", but I can not promise more. Some of it I may try here.

Let me reiterate, I would not be alive were it not for the gentle, caring people here. I share your hurts and wounds. But, my Heavenly Father has shown me a different way to come against the walls of prejudice and hate we face. I love you all, and now I must spread out. There are some people who astonsishingly fully accept me as I am, and I hope that as I tell my story, it will provide education for those of faith, and eventually compassion and understanding for us. This new acceptance and love comes from an astonishing and unlikely place, and it is my deepest prayer that this will move our long battle for acceptance and compassion forward. I will not mention them here, but will in PMs if anyone is curious.

I urge you all to feel your pain and express it and to never give up but to move on in life and not make your existence all about your pain but about your future life, and I hope you will move out of your pain and not give up. May God bless you all.

Gwendolyn Boucher