Tuesday Got up late (again!) Jules reckons I could sleep for England but I think I’m only second string. He he. Met Paul and Clive at papershop and walked to school with them.

Our English teacher, Miss Ross, had got us all writing a diary this week and I have to say that so far mine is very boring! Well the day didn’t get any more exciting than that, well not till after school anyway.

I know it’s only two weeks since I last raced but it seems like forever. I got myself ready as soon as I got home, grabbed a sandwich and went to polish my bike before going out. I settled down to doing a thorough job, I had an hour before I needed to leave and after seeing the gleaming team bikes in Germany I was determined to use that bit of psychology. I was surprised; in fact I jumped when the doorbell went.

“Hi Mad” guess who?

“Hi Drew, you ready?” Mad asked

“For what? I’m racing tonight remember”

“‘Course I remember, I thought I’d ride out with you if that’s ok” she sounded a bit peeved.

“Er sorry. Yeah why not, I’m just finishing cleaning my bike, come round to the garage”

“Ok”

I estimated we would take about five minutes longer to get to Cuckney than I usually do so I quickly checked my tyres before declaring I was ready to leave. We must have looked an odd pair as we rode along, me on a racing bike wearing a skinsuit and Mad in shorts and t-shirt on her lumpy ATB.

Now let me just state that tonight I was not wearing earrings or any makeup ok.

“Hi Dee, I take it your racing?” John the timekeeper greeted me

“Er yes please” I replied – Maddy stifled a laugh

“It’s not funny!” I mouthed to her as John fetched the signing on sheet.

“We’ll all have to watch out for you eh!” John went on, I looked dumb, “I bet that mum of yours has been giving you tips eh?”

“Oh, yes”

“That was a great ride last week, I saw the highlights on Eurosport”

“I didn’t know it was on, but as I was there I didn’t think to look”

“Number eight this week, I think I’ve got it taped, I usually do, I’ll bring it next week” he offered

“That would be great” I enthused.

“I can’t interest you in a ride” he addressed Mad.

“Er no, I’m strictly a spectator for ‘Dee’” she replied.

“About ten minutes before we start Dee”

“Thanks”

We walked along to a bench where I could finish getting ready.

“I can’t believe they think I’m a girl!” I pouted

“It’s not so bad ‘Dee’, they think I’m one all the time” Mad replied deadpan

Well I couldn’t keep a straight face; I just cracked up followed closely by Mad.

I started to give my usual pre race self-massage but my new ‘manager’ took over and gave me a thorough leg rub that I can never manage myself.

‘I’ll have to have you at all my races if this is the treatment I get” I joked

Mad gave me an appraising look.

“Time for you to go ‘Dee’”

“Yeah and give up the Dee business please”

“Okay Gab, see you in a while”

Grrr girls!

It was a nice evening but the lack of any real wind meant that there was little help anywhere around the course. It seemed like forever getting to the turn and longer on the return although my clock was showing a healthy twenty four minutes when I passed Mad shouting at me at the last corner. I wheezed a bit heavier and pushed on to the finish.

“Eight!” I gasped

I checked my computer, nah there must be something up with it perhaps I stopped it early?

When I got back to the finish I was greeted by a lot of ‘well done’'s, a bit of clapping and smiling all-round.

“25.03 Dee, congratulations!” John shouted across.

I just about managed to put my bike down before Maddy grabbed a hold of me and started doing that girly jiggy thing they do when they’re excited. I had little choice but to let her finish.

“Stop Mad please?”

“Sorry Gab, come on I’ll do your legs!”

We had attracted a small audience of amused (mostly) competitors and helpers. With legs fast turning to jelly, Mad led me to the bench where I just collapsed with my bottle of energy drink. My ‘manager’ attended to cleaning me up and giving my legs a post race rub aah! bliss!

I wasn’t the only one who had done a personal best; there were several more rounds of congratulations while Mad administered to my needs.

“I can’t believe it!” I stated

“What?” Mad asked

“Well taking most of a minute off my best” I ticked off one finger, “you coming out and doing this,” a second finger, “and everyone still thinks I’m a girl!” a third finger.

Mad just giggled.

“Come on Drew, let’s go home”

“…25.03 mum! I couldn’t believe it, I thought my computer had broken”

“Well done son. How’s school going?” mum asked

“Oh you know, same old”

“Jules says you’re going with her to Anna’s party?”

Loudmouth sister!

“Yeah, I got talked into going”

“You’re going as ‘Gaby’?”

“Yes mum” I sighed

“Well make sure you wear a clean bra and pants”

“Muuum!” I exclaimed

“Okay Drew, are you sure you want to dress up again?”

“Well like Rhod said yesterday, it’s only clothes”

“Remember what I said before, if you want to talk?”

“Yes mum”

“Now put your dad on”

“Dad! Mum wants you” I shouted before continuing, “bye mum”

“Bye Drew”

Wednesday’s entry in the diary was a bit more exciting!

I managed to stay out of trouble and Gaby until Thursday evening and Mr Woods meeting.

“Okay people settle down”

We quieted.

“We’ve sorted out the programme and there has been a bit of a change of plan” he paused for emphasis as we all looked at each other.

“Our friends in America say they don’t want too many excursions, they are going to have a few days sightseeing before they arrive in Warsop. So we will now have just six excursions which you can all go on.”

There was a round of happy / excited comments.

“Now I know one or two of you have been in contact with your exchangees, I hope you are ’bonding’?”

“Yes sir”

“Good. Right then I’ll let you know when we are meeting again. Off you go”

I hung back to talk to Mr Woods

“Ah young Bond, what can I do for you?”

“Well sir, urm,”

“Come on Drew, spit it out”

“Well everyone else has someone the same sex as an exchange partner, how come I got a girl?”

Mr Wood looked thoughtful for a moment and then made a decision.

“Okay Drew, the Americans had more girls than boys compared to our side. Rather than disappoint anyone I thought you wouldn’t mind looking after Britney, especially as you er, ‘get on well’ with the girls and your sister will have a student there too. Is that ok?”

“Yeah, I was just curious”

“Fine, see you next time Drew, goodnight”

“‘Nite Sir”

“My place after school Drew” Mad shouted across the crowded corridor. It received the expected whistles and catcalls from our classmates, which caused the ‘Sisters Grimm’, to both turn bright red.

Sheesh I was not looking forward to this – Mad was bound to be in full ‘dress Gaby’ mode, I just hoped I could get away with something fairly unisex!

After an afternoon of sniggers from the girls and envious (if only they knew) glances from the boys, I finally left the hell that was school. The girls were waiting for me; there was no escape!

‘Aunt Carol’ was already appraised of what was going down so after feeding us, a salad unfortunately, she left us to it. I thought that I might get away with just trying on a few things – no way! My ‘friends’ started on my hair, moved on to my nails then rounded off with my face. I looked like Mad’s twin again, very disconcerting.

“Right Drew, underwear first then we’ll find you a nice outfit”

Ally passed me a set of lingerie the like I’d only seen in shop windows – all lace and underwiring. There was no point arguing, I was already on a loser. I changed in the bathroom; this bra was so different to any of those I had worn before. I positioned my breastforms and returned to the lynch mob.

“Come on gurlfriend!” Bernie purred

“Wow Gab, that is soo sexy” Ally added

“Give over. Can we just get on with this? Please?”

“Okay Gaby”

Well I thought I’d seen most of Mad’s wardrobe but there was stuff here I’d never seen her wear. My tormentors had me in and out of about a dozen outfits from jeans to a party frock. In the end I had to remodel three outfits for ‘Aunt Carol’ who decided on the final selection.

At least it wasn’t too revealing!

“Okay girls time to go home, Gaby you’re staying here tonight, I’ll drop you two off”

“Yes Mrs Peters”

“Yes Aunt Carol”

Apparently there were forces in operation that I was unaware of.

“Come on Gabs, mum’s bringing pizza back”

Even though I was wearing a dress, that sounded good.

“Mum’s taking us to Manchester tomorrow” Mad dropped into the conversation.

“Who’s ‘us’?” well I had to ask

“Ally, Bern, you Gabs and me of course”

Of course! What is this? Some sort of conspiracy?

“Whoa, whoa. I said I’d go to Anna’s party not become Gaby full time”

“Oh come on Gab, it’s only shopping”

I rolled my eyes.

“And like no one will know you in Manchester”

“I guess not”

“Oh pleeze!” she begged

Girls! Especially ones as cute as Maddy. Hang on, if Maddy is cute and I look like her twin that means – shit (excuse me), I’m cute! Aargh!

“What?”

“Er yeah ok” I replied in defeat.

At least the pizza was good, hot and spicy meat feast.

Maddy Bell 29.09.03