Chapter 7
It was a moment that seemed to last forever. Robert found that he couldn’t move and he daren’t turn to look back in case Adele had recognised him as feminine as he looked in a morning dress. It was as if time had stood still and his limbs were locked and wouldn’t function. After what seemed an age he let go of his breasts and stretched his right arm to the long sweeping bannister that stretched to the hallway below and had the courage to look back over his shoulder with head stooped so that his face was hidden as much as possible.
Time had stood still. Adele had also stopped in her tracks to watch him mount the long staircase. A young woman who was clearly trying not to be noticed who appeared from nowhere and seemed shy or frightened in front of a strange man. Adele did not mind. It gave her a feeling of superiority. A feeling she’d often craved for in business and her daily life that she had not experienced before. She was intrigued to know who the woman was and why Robert hadn’t mentioned her.
On the other hand Robert was sure he had been recognised. Their eyes met as they absorbed as much information as they could about each other in the brief moments that took an age. Roberts looked down and avoided Adele’s gaze as much as possible until he was finally able to move again. Adele reached out an arm but seemed unable to speak so she smiled and made a small bow that Robert acknowledged with a small curtsey.
Robert hurried as quickly as he could to the safety of the landing and looked into the large glass on the wall. He could see no sign of his maleness so hoped that he could quickly change and avoid an embarrassing discussion with Adele. He didn’t know what she might think.
Polly ensured that Adele was comfortable although she didn't want to be fussed and preferred to lean on the mantle shelf whilst he waited and tinker with the fire.
Adele was sure Robert would have told her if he had been accompanied. Could it be a friend or was she a cousin or some other relative. She certainly wasn’t a maid or his aunt. She was elegant and too well dressed for a maid. She appeared to be much too young for this to be Aunt Roberta.
Even from a distance Adele could also see that she was quite beautiful and she felt a pang of jealousy because she was here in the same house as Robert and unless they were related he would surely be attracted. Was he keeping her secret?
Something inside her loins stirred because she found her very attractive even from a distance and were she really Arthur, the man she was posing to be, she might even be tempted to seek an introduction and enquire further. Where was Robert before she lost her senses? They had to get out of there as soon as possible because these sudden feelings disturbed her.
As she stirred the logs on the fire they crackled and a few sparks flew. She stared into the hot embers for a while and warmed her hands that were unusually cold. They weren’t as big as an average man’s hands and that was the one thing that might give her away at the club if she didn’t take care. Outside she could wear gloves. As for Robert it was unusual for him not to at least greet her. Where was he and what was taking him so long. She had arrived early out of politeness but at the same time hoping to be introduced to his aunt but not to be. She had decided that she must be very rich to own such a splendid house in a prime area of London. It was well decorated and filled with ornaments and expensive furniture.
She reflected again on the beautiful young woman who was surely not an apparition and she could still visualise her face and the pretty smile she showed when their eyes met. Adele sighed in admiration and reflected on the many times her grandfather had said that he wished she was a boy. If she had have been she would have had great fun and lots of girlfriends by now. Instead she was still single and fighting to save her grandfather’s hard work and success having to resort to being disguised as a man just to enter a club that she might inherit if there was anything left.
When their eyes had met he wondered if it was she looked like a woman masquerading in male garb rather than being strong and handsome as she tried to project. Was this reaction normal or was she behaving like some evil pervert?
Upstairs Robert and Polly were hurrying to transform Roberta to Robert and in the process Robert didn’t even hesitate to stand bare chested exposing two perfectly formed appendages whilst Polly removed overnight body odours with a damp cloth. She took care around Robert’s nipples realising they were sensitive and a little sore like her own at certain times of the month. She enquired as discreetly as she could if it was necessary to clean below in case it was her period. Robert coloured and stuttered a reply but Polly concluded that she was right.
Whist Robert had become more comfortable around Polly whilst presenting as a woman he had been scared during the brief encounter with Adele in case she realised who he was. He was fearful of being found in female garb by any person other than Polly and his aunt and especially by Adele who he might have to take into his confidence soon if the masquerade was to continue. At least he felt it necessary to find the right opportunity to explain his reasons for the transformation from man to woman.
His heart was beating faster than normal. He could recall the smile on Adele’s face and realised that his own eyes fluttered drawing even more attention from Adele who spoke softly to wish him good morning. Polly had seemed to encourage the exchange and was trying to hide the broad smile on her face. She had not hurried Adele to the library or indeed to the drawing room both of which were close to hand.
In some respects he had wanted to be seen because he knew he looked very attractive as a woman whereas as a man he wasn’t of tall stature or particularly handsome because of the feminine features that he now realised were from his aunts and fathers side of the family. Whilst dressed as a woman both Polly and Aunt Roberta had paid him several nice complements that he never received as a man. Now something inside wanted him to introduce Adele to this other side of him as he had been fortunate already to see another side of her.
When reaching the staircase Robert had almost turned to go back into the hallway towards Adele but instead he had hesitated and frozen. On the first steps on the open staircase that spiralled to the first floor and then up to the top floor he had looked back over his shoulder watching Adele disappear into the library. He anticipated her likely questions to either ask why he had been dressed like a woman or who this young woman was and why she was staying in the house.
Whatever might be the case he already decided that he needed to find a way to explain himself to her before presenting dressed as a woman in front of her. Maybe soon he might invite her to dinner with Aunt Roberta but he knew his aunt would want her niece to be there and then should Adele present as herself or as Arthur. That was a conundrum for another day. He still couldn’t be sure that she’d accept him dressed as Roberta.
Whilst he was enjoying the experience to present as Roberta it was in the safety of his aunt’s house but whether or not he could carry it off outside or in male company was another question. Men dressing as women didn’t seem to be socially accepted yet he knew several women who presented as men and had relationships.
His progress was slow because of his daydreaming as he walked slowly to his bedroom and he jumped at a noise. Polly appeared from nowhere having used the servant’s staircase at the rear of the house that had direct access to the large kitchen and larder. It continue down to the cellar and servants quarters where Polly lived.
Polly said that Mr Arthur had made no comment other than a polite greeting and that he seemed to be a good catch for Miss Roberta asking if she was interested. Robert flushed again and Polly didn’t need to hear a response. She made some comment under her breath about missing out due to the burden of being a housekeeper and dogsbody. It appeared that she’d never matched or married and I hoped there was still time for her. It would be Robert’s task to help find a suitor if he was around long enough. Perhaps that would be easier to do as Robert than Roberta but Adele might help.
Since Mr Arthur had made no comment to Polly about the young woman who flashed past him Polly never spoke other than to ask if he needed some refreshment. He had declined. She did pluck up the courage to wish Robert good luck and to let this man see how beautiful she was before somebody else caught him.
Robert blushed continuously as he hurried to change his attire that he blamed on the warm fire and the extra logs that Polly had added before breakfast. It was a beautiful day outside so he was keen to get some fresh air. He focused on removing as much evidence as he could of the delicate soaps on his body and the powder on his face. He tried to brush out the natural curls of his hair and hurriedly tied it back with a black ribbon. Polly produced his tight vest that he needed to restrict his budding breasts. He had discarded the tapes and pins that had hurt him and left marks as well has hurting his nipples. Since she only accepted Robert as Roberta and it was her time of the month she was too discreet to help him to remove his pantaloons.
Robert then quickly dressed in his male garb noticing that Polly was shaking her head because she perhaps didn’t like his taste. He asked what was wrong but as a long serving servant of his aunt Roberta she hesitated to speak out. It wasn’t her place to give negative comment or make judgement so instead she just steered him towards the glass to let him check himself and he kept an eye over his shoulder for any change in expression on Polly’s face. He hadn’t many options open to him but finally he got a nod.
As he took a final look in the glass he now realised that even dressed in his male garb he had a feminine air and a certain grace. He tried to correct his stance placing his feet apart. His right hand had moved naturally to his hip as he turned to check himself from the rear as well as from the front. Polly said nothing and she tried to look away. He couldn’t help that he had such delicate features and didn’t fill his jacket very well.
He felt awkward already and more so a little disappointed to revert back to being Master Robert. There was even a hint of a sigh that didn’t go unnoticed by Polly. As he left his bedroom he could swear he heard her speak under her breath again. She was of the mind that he should have faced Mr Arthur as himself without this charade dressing as a man. He couldn’t help but smile to himself. If only Polly knew that both he and Adele were in disguise.
Free of some of the feminine restraints he skipped quickly down the staircase to meet Adele doing his best to leave behind the image of Roberta. Had Adele had more chance to look more closely before he hurried upstairs he knew she would have realised it was him. He would soon find out.
As he entered the library he found Adele still leaning on the mantle shelf of the fireplace standing on tiptoes to look more closely at the painting hanging above her head.
She said nothing except good morning as they greeted each other as two close friends would do with handshake and a smile. There was no body contact and certainly no kiss of greeting that Robert was tempted to do even though Adele was presenting as Arthur. It didn’t seem right.
Adele certainly matched Robert with the strength of her handshake and she looked very elegant and much smarter than Robert who was a little short of male wardrobe at home and he hadn’t left much behind in Bristol. He wished he had the same wardrobe as he’d used as Roberta so he decided that he needed to visit a good tailor whilst in London. All well and good but he didn’t have the income for expensive purchases and there were no male clothes that he could borrow. His lifestyle at home did not offer many opportunities for visits to Gentlemen’s clubs or visits to restaurants for lunch or dinner appointments. He never went to the theatre or other places of entertainment except to English Pubs to drink beer or cider.
He hoped that he would like to visit a theatre with Adele whilst he was in London because as yet he hadn’t seen her as herself only as Arthur. She had a nice figure even if more robust than Roberts with strong arms and legs. It was her slightly masculine features that enhanced her beauty in his eyes that had first turned his head.
Adele looked so assured and confident and must surely have spent time out in London dressed as a man to outdo his own masculinity. He’d felt attracted to her in a completely different way when they were in the club together the day before. The same feeling returned as he gazed into her piercing blue eyes.
They were such opposites yet they seemed naturally attracted to each other. Adele was exciting and liked to take a risk whilst he was quiet and indecisive that perhaps was because he was over cautious and had to be careful with his money. Yet we were comfortable in each other’s company.
Adele pointed to the woman in the painting and commented on her beauty asking if it was a portrait of someone related to Robert. In truth Robert had not looked closely until now and yes he did see that it was the same person as in the painting upstairs.
Adele seemed a little agitated as she spoke and she turned her head away looking through the window into the square before speaking out ‘This young woman is so beautiful. Who is it?’ Haven’t you asked your aunt?
Robert had no immediate answer but he agreed she was indeed beautiful and that there was a resemblance to him. Adele looked at him almost demanding some response shaking her head in disbelief at Roberts lack of inquisitiveness and uttering that it was typical of a man.
He mumbled an apology for his ignorance in his response but only because he wanted to find out for himself. He thought this this must be someone with family connection perhaps someone related to his father and aunt. Maybe a sister who had been sent away or done something criminal.
Adele gave up and suddenly announced they must leave whilst looking at her pocket watch and winding it. She had made a lunch reservation at the club and arranged a meeting that she announced whilst on their way in the carriage that was still waiting outside. Lucky that Adele could afford such luxury.
During the journey Adele enquired further and wouldn’t let the matter drop. She wanted to point out what she’d noticed and concluded. She felt the woman was either an Aunt or possibly a great aunt because of the family resemblance and she made reference to the signature and date in the corner of the painting. A famous painter in London who still did business even though he was old. They could visit and ask.
Robert didn’t have an answer but this was the third painting that now intrigued him. There was a resemblance and he had little knowledge of his family tree unlike Adele who knew so much about hers. He only really met his parents and two aunts on his mother’s side who had no resemblance to him and he supposed neither did his mother. He must take after his father’s side of the family and he recalled his aunt’s first comments on arrival at Tavistock Square.
Since Adele said nothing about observing him hurrying across the hallway dressed as Roberta he hoped that she hadn’t noticed, or if so, she hadn’t realised it was him. Even so he was a little surprised since had it been the same situation in reverse he would not have ignored it. He would have found a way to introduce the subject at the very least. There was a strange quiet.
Adele advised that she had dressed suitably for the club and apologised if this embarrassed Robert but she had no choice. She was smiling as the words passed her lips. Robert had felt completely at ease with Adele presenting as Arthur and felt she made a handsome man as well as a beautiful woman.
However Adele was dressed this was a nice opportunity to be free on the streets of London without expense or risk of robbery or attack. Adele put her arm around his shoulder as friend might do and apologised for being bad tempered and so inquisitive but she wanted Robert to understand more about his aunt and her apparent wealth because her name was well respected in the club amongst members.
Sadly because she was a woman she could not be a member although some members had knowledge of a business partner and a male friend.
Robert knew nothing of this so he was quiet and listened carefully. Perhaps they might meet someone who had knowledge of his aunt whilst he also intended to try to glean what he could by spending as much time with her as possible. He knew that meant spending time as Miss Roberta. It seemed inevitable that he would have to be open with Adele.
They soon arrived at there destination.
Comments
I have been reading in one go up to here,
Julie, and was too intent on knowig more to stop for more than a kudo, sorry!
I absolutely love this story. It is very well written and full of small details, that lend so much reality to it. It is as if one is just watching from besides Robert/a. I certainly can relate to ALL the feelings, wonderful. Thanks so much for this lovely tale.
Monique.
Monique S