I almost dropped the phone in shock. I wanted to slam down the phone. I wanted to slam it down and break it, but still somehow cry and shout and tell him off... but I didn't.

I decided to bite the bullet and call Jerry right away.

"Am I interrupting dinner?" I asked.

"No," he said. "It's cool. I was just about to call you myself."

"Oh," I said. "Well, here I am!"

I wanted to say I miss you, but if Mrs. Earshon was right, I didn't want to make it harder for him.

I really like Jerry. I've always liked Jerry. Hearing his voice made me wish I was there, in California, with him, rather than here in cold New Jersey, clutching a telephone.

I wanted to be right next to him so I could feel... all that I was feeling... there, with him. He could put his arm around me, and we could kiss, and never stop...

In my mind's eye I could see us, feel us... our lips touching, our eyes closed, his arms around my shoulders, mine around his chest... me standing on tiptoe...

It felt like months since our last kiss... though it's only been two weeks.

I asked about his family. He told me that Nina said hello, and that Cassie asked whether I liked the Cosmo she'd given me.

"She also told me to ask if you found a new boyfriend yet," he added. "That's Cassie asking, not me."

"I know," I said, blushing. "She's a terrible tease."

"Yeah, tell me about it!" he agreed. "But she wouldn't tease you if she didn't like you."

"I know," I said. "It's the Auburn family's way of showing affection."

"Yeah, I guess. That's what Mom says, anyway. She says she consoles herself with that thought." He laughed. She would need some consolation: Mr. Auburn was the biggest tease of all!

"Anyway," Jerry continued, "speaking of Cassie — and I'm not supposed to tell you this, in case it doesn't happen — but she might stop by and visit you in January. Did you know she's going to Princeton next year? Is that close to you?"

"Oh, uh, I didn't know — I don't know," I said. "I don't think Princeton is close-close... I'll have to look at a map... but, oooh! Ivy League! I didn't realize she was that smart! Princeton is Ivy League, right?"

"Yeah, it is. My parents are over the Moon about it. And yeah, she is that smart. I'll tell her you had your doubts, though," he replied in a smirking tone.

"Oh, don't do that! I don't want Cassie mad at me, especially if she's coming here!" I laughed.

"Don't worry, I'll just tell her you said hi. And that you hate Cosmo." He laughed again.

After that, a silence fell between us, a silence that for some reason seemed extremely awkward. I put my fingertips on the mouthpiece and sent a wordless I miss you down the line. It felt like he got it.

But then, he took a breath and began saying something he must have rehearsed before we spoke. It had that pre-prepared sound to it. "Marcie, I know you haven't been gone very long, but–"

Ouch! This was it! Mrs. Earshon was right! It was coming, it was here, plain as day. Suddenly Jerry was on tiptoe, choosing his words carefully, as if he was afraid of breaking something.

When he got as far as, "... and this isn't easy to say..." I couldn't stand the suspense, so I blurted out, "Jerry, are you breaking up with me?" and started wringing my hands.

Why did I rush right to the point? Part of me wanted him to suffer and squirm, to make him squeeze out the words as painfully as possible, but another part of me — well, most of me — wanted to get it over with. Like pulling off a bandaid: I always took a deep breath and just did it, as fast and hard as possible. If it was going to hurt or even make me scream, at least it would be quick: I wanted it to happen and be over.

Unfortunately, having somebody dump you isn't anything like pulling off a bandage. Even if you know it's coming, even if it happens long distance, even if it's because you moved away, it still hurts, and as badly as it hurts in the moment, it hurts much worse afterward.

I knew there was no point in trying to hang on. I knew it before I left California. I was just a freshman in high school, for pity's sake. And honestly (as I told myself the next day) what I missed wasn't so much Jerry himself, but Jerry's family. I was an only child, and being with the Auburns was my first experience of family life. Do you know what I mean? I have a family, but not brothers and sisters...

No, that's all a lie: I missed Jerry. I missed him: his smile, his protective arms, his jokes, the way he'd embarrass me and make me blush, then laugh and call me cute... and I'd miss the way he kissed me.

"Yeah," he said. "I'm sorry. But you're far away, and..."

"Oh!" I said, struck by that last phrase... what did he mean? "You're far away," he'd said, leaning a little on the you're, as if to say... *I* am far away... but someone else is near!

Again, I rushed right to the point: "You're already seeing someone else?"

"Um, yeah, right," he said. "How did you know? Did she tell you?"

She? Who was this "she" that could tell me? There was only one person: "Eden?" I gasped, astonished. My best friend, Eden!? "You're going out with Eden? Oh, Jerry! How could you?"

I almost hung up. I almost dropped the phone in shock. I wanted to slam it down and break it, but still somehow cry and shout and tell him off...

... but I didn't.

We talked for twenty minutes more. I cried for fifteen of them.

When we finally hung up, I set the phone down and looked at it. With both hands I swept the tears off my cheeks and wiped my hands on my skirt. I took yet another tissue for my nose, and grabbed the phone again.

I called Eden and went through the whole business again with her. She told me how it happened. They ran into each other and started talking about me. They sat together in the cafeteria to talk about me. They walked together so they could talk about me.

Pretty soon, one thing led to another, and — well, it wasn't that they weren't talking about me, but they found other things they could do together... and Jerry ended up back at the boyfriends' table.

She didn't say, but I could picture him touching her hand, the two of them kissing... I didn't want to see it, but my mind did it all by itself, illustrating all the things that Eden didn't say.

Still and all, I understood. It hurt, and so did my stomach after all that crying, but I understood. Corey was a nice boy, and he was Eden's first boyfriend ever, but... (sigh) he couldn't compare to Jerry.

And Eden was lonely, too. She and Carla were friends... but it wasn't the same since I left.

Unfortunately, my mental pictures were far too good: I could see the two of them! Eden and Jerry, laughing, talking, arm in arm, walking away, kissing... my face grew red with embarrassment.

I felt rejected, flat, ugly, and unloved, but at the same time, I had to admit, however grudgingly, that they made a nice couple. At least they did in the pictures in my head.

After an hour with Eden, we were laughing again, friends like before, and I missed her so much! When I finally hung up, my ear was all hot and flabby. I grabbed it and tried to waggle and rub a little life back into it, when the phone rang again. I picked up before it finished the first ring.

"The Donner Residence," I announced, trying to sound as prim and proper as possible. I was goofing around, figuring that Eden had forgotten to tell me something. But it wasn't her at all!

"How formal!" a familiar, sexy voice replied. "I hope I didn't need a reservation before I placed this call."

"Trevor?" I said with some surprise. Recovering, I asked, "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"I'm glad you find talking to me such a pleasure," he said, with an audible smile. "Marcie, I'm calling to see if you're free. Do you we think we might be able to see each other this weekend? I'm thinking maybe lunch, maybe a movie... or if you prefer something more active, there's roller skating, or we could even go bowling. I'm pretty open as to what we do, as long as it's you and me, doing it together. How does that sound?"

"Hmmm," I said. "It does sound good, but what about the difficulties it would create in the workplace?"

"I figure that we could be — oh what's that word... discreet? I don't know about you, but I've never been discreet before, so it could be something new for both of us."

I laughed, but then I sighed. "Oh, Trevor."

It was certainly tempting, especially after getting dumped by Jerry. Heck, Trevor was temptation incarnate!

I sighed again. "I'm sorry, because I'll be busy this weekend, but anyway, I've never been good at keeping a low profile."

"I see," he said. "You're figuring that we'll go somewhere and terrorists will pop out of the woodwork."

"Something like that," I agreed.

"And you will have to subdue them," he continued.

"Yeah, right," I said. "Seriously, though, things happen. Usually when I don't expect them. And the more I try to be invisible, the worse it gets. At least, that's my history."

"So why don't you try expecting them and looking for them, and then maybe those things won't happen? We could do it as an experiment, say Saturday afternoon? Besides, even if all hell breaks loose, I wouldn't mind a little adventure... Flickerbridge is way too quiet. If we get caught, we can always say that we simply ran into each other. A coincidence. After all, we *do* live in the same town. It could happen." After a pause, he added, "In fact, I think it should happen. I'll willing to bet that it's bound to happen."

"I forgot how persistent you are," I said, feeling warm and flattered. I glanced at myself in the mirror and ran my hand through my hair. "But I have to say no. Our parents work together, and..." I wanted to kick myself, but somehow I had to do the right thing.

"I get it, I get it," he said. "Listen, why don't we do this: can you save me a few dances at the company's Christmas party? Like all of them?"

"That sounds good," I agreed with a smile. "That can certainly be done."

"Then it's settled," he said. "Let's call it a date. We'll make it happen."

I laughed and agreed, and we said our goodbyes.

When I ran downstairs for a snack, Mom was standing by the refrigerator. I still had a big smile on my face. She noticed it, and pointed to my big red ear.

"Looks like someone's been on the phone a long time," she observed. "Who were you talking to?"

"Oh, Jerry," I said. "He broke up with me." Mom's eyebrows went up. "Then I called Eden. Jerry's dating her now."

"Ah," Mom said, taken aback. She couldn't put it together, so she said, "I see. And that makes you happy because..." She waved her hand in a vague circle, indicating that I should fill in the blanks.

"Oh," I said, suddenly realizing that I couldn't tell her why I was smiling. "Oh, uh, Eden just told me some funny stuff and made me laugh. Right at the end of the call."

"Uh-huh," Mom grunted. She clearly didn't believe me, but it didn't look like she was going to push it.

She did look like she was about say something, though, so I quickly pre-empted it.

"Mom, please don't say anything about me and boys tonight, okay? Don't tell me I'm lucky I don't have a boyfriend or any of that stuff, okay?" The last "okay" came out as a high squeak, and two big round tears rolled down my face. My smile was gone... I don't know where.

"Oh, honey," she said, and came to hug me.

The tears ended there, though. "I guess I got all cried out with Eden," I told her, turning my head inside her hug so I could breath and talk.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" she offered, as she squeezed me and rubbed my back a little.

"Maybe tomorrow," I said, not resisting the hug. "But promise–"

"No comments about boys or dating or luck," she smiled. "I guess that means I don't get to say anything."

"We'll see how it goes," I said, laughing, and wiped the last two tears away.

© 2007 Kaleigh Way