Chapter 49
Bzzt,Bzzt.
Bzzt,Bzzt.
Bzzt,Bzzt.
Nothing again… C’mon Fay-fay, where are you? Rach couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so hard to get to on the phone. It made her wish she could cry over something so trivial. Rach felt her eyes dampen. She knew it was the painkiller they’d given her. She got all emotional the last time they gave it to her; which, oddly enough, was due to a completely different snowboard injury.
They’d gotten her out on the snow, fitted her with one of those inflatable pressure bandages. It hurt through the numbness from the snow. Rach and the medic were more worried about frostbite than the ankle itself. The medics had gotten her back up to the room, where she was stuck watching daytime television laughing at the dancers who had just found out that they were, indeed, not the father. She’d been lying there for the better part of an hour. That added to the frustration. Rach realized some time ago how much she didn’t just want to have Faye around.
She needed to have her around. All the time in the clubs and at the parties, making stupid boys gawk… Rach smiled, feeling the buzz of the Vicodin. She didn’t even mind Zoe so much, as long as Faye was there.
Rach humphed and started paying attention to the two gay gang members from rival gangs and started giggling at the sheer stupidity of it. C’mon, Fay-fay, you should be here laughing at this absurd bullshit with me. Rach knew that Faye was at work and would be busy for a bit longer, but she should have at least texted by now…
*****
Bzzt! Bzzt!

Bobbie was trying to block out the sound of the vibrating phone. It just kept going off. She was glad that she had shut off the ringer after it went off the first two times. There was no way she was going to finish the shoot whilst talking on the phone. Mutant sentient elephants couldn’t drag her away from this.
The resort’s largest suite had been emptied, cloth draped over the walls. There were lights set up and Bobbie looked at the most ridiculous collection of things ever seen in a college dorm room. Musical instruments, video games, avant garde furniture…
Bobbie remembered before, Robb had wanted to go to college. Thoughts of starting fresh, meeting people, meeting girls; all the college comedies they watched. She vaguely wondered what it would have been like, going to college. For a moment, just a moment, she missed being Robb. Bobbie wondered what life would have been like if Robb had chickened out while talking to Melanie. Melanie. That was a name that hadn’t come up in a few days. Bobbie thought about where she could have gone…
“Faye,” Luka’s voice straight razored its way through Bobbie’s reverie, “Ailie’s ready for you.”
“Oh, alright.” Luka was dressed in a half shirt that exposed her midriff, ‘Talk Nerdy to Me’ Splayed across her breasts. Making her way to the corner of the room, Bobbie leered at Luka. Playboy for nerds, huh? I would’ve bought it. Looking at Luka, Bobbie decided that she still would.
After Bobbie got into Ailie’s chair, she sat and let Ailie work her magic. The pink streaks came back, and the extensions freshened up. An eye shadow with a matching shade was applied.
“Ye know, Faye. I ken Mike’s gonna let ye do as ye will. He’ll neever say it, but he’s in love with that snowboard shot.
“Of course he is.” Bobbie said nonchalantly. She saw some metal glint on the table. “What are those?”
“Oh, these? Thee’re magnetic bohdy joolry. Why? Ah, lass. Another idea?”
“Something like that.”
***
Bobbie walked out naked; faux snake bites and nose stud adorned her face, standing out through the smooth, even skin. The dark hair extensions covering the nipples, they eagerly tried to point out through the hair. She grabbed a tattered paperback copy of Dune and covered the delicate seam which held the enigma of her womanhood secreted away from all but the most prying of eyes.
“Ready for my close up, Mike?”
Mike was shocked by what he saw. “Faye! This wasn’t a nude shoot.”
“C’mon Mike. I have another idea.” Bobbie looked down at another book, this one a smaller paperback entitled Galactic Patrol. She swiftly traded books, holding up Dune. “You must not fear, fear is the mind killer.” She smiled, holding Dune’s binding at the middle of her bottom lip.
“Was thinking of artful placement of props, be more fun and flirty than Talk Nerdy To Me.” Bobbie walked to a maroon futon and lay down, using her legs to artfully cover herself. Bobbie shook her hair over her left nipple and struck a winking pose.
Mike fumbled for the camera and started shooting, thinking that all the while; this might be shoot he’d been waiting for. Allegra, I owe you bigtime. And why have you been hiding her? Mike thought. Curious how such a talent hasn’t blown up yet. He had visions of the Little Prince, catching a ride on a shooting star.
****
Bobbie sat with Luka, Yu-Gi-Oh cards splayed in a pattern Bobbie wasn’t familiar with. She held cards, as did Luka, now sitting in her underwear. Their hands held close to their chests, their faces scrunched up with effort, leaning in, noses nearly touching.
“See these cards, they represent fucks, ergo, you have five fucks to give, while I have none.” Faye had told her, her memory of the last four days… Four days? It’s only been four days?
Bobbie shook her head, a nipple slipping out into full view between the heartbeats of the camera lens. Mike gasped.
Bobbie shot him a stricken look. “Keep shooting…” She looked back at Luka. “This is… it feels right.” Nipples and even enough complete breast to imply perfect topography populated shot after shot. A cooling sensation spread through her back. “Luka, throw the cards up in the air on three.”
Mike quickly set the camera to take video, figuring he could isolate the stills later on the MacBook. Bobbie counted three and cards flew to the ceiling.
Bobbie posed with a guitar, while Luka sat topless on the drums. There was the videogame set, where Bobbie sat on the blue vinyl couch. Intense focus shown on the face Bobbie was rapidly becoming accustomed to.
Bobbie and Luka played around with every object in the room, Mike taking shot after astonishing shot. No one noticed time passing, Mike entranced by the perfect framing of his shots, Luka having a good shoot…
…and Bobbie having more fun than she could ever remember.
***
Mike couldn’t believe his luck. Faye and Luka are incredible together. Screw you, Leibowitz. He grinned as thoughts of this perfect shoot played through his mind. Van Der Haven’s gonna get his magazine alright.
“Y’know, Faye. I’m gonna need another release signed for these shots.” Mike said as he continued pointing the lens at Bobbie.
Posing with a copy of Watchmen and a tall can of some unidentifiable energy drink, Bobbie said, “Not worried, just have it ready.”
“Luka, you as well.”
“Oh. Okay.” Luka bent her willowy frame to the left, craning to read the adventures of Dr. Manhattan over Bobbie’s bared shoulder.
Mike was ecstatic. Bobbie could tell. The colors were gone, like the darknesses. There it was; it seemed stupid that she would only see black, white and grey. Once she had shifted into this body, the world and its people became alive, teeming and thriving with colors. Her actions changed them with a fluidity that bordered on hypersurreal. Luka, Mike, and Ailie; Even Rach. It made sense that those darknesses would disappear with the cupcakes she baked.
Jeez, seems like this way is more fun.
With the shoot over, Bobbie stood at a table, looking at the new release form. As she signed, she started to make a capital ‘B’. Quickly zagging her hand, she turned it into a large ‘F’ and made a rickety scrawl on the dotted line
You should thank me for this, Faye. I think I just made you a star. Bobbie got dressed and stood with Luka and Mike as he looked through the pictures he had gotten. The stills he isolated from the video came out beautifully, with the cards hanging in the air. The musical instrument shots looked fantastic, with the guitar covering her nether regions.
“Faye.” Mike began. “You are one hell of a talent, it’s almost like you knew what I wanted to see. And Luka.” He turned to her. “There should be a law that requires you two to work together. Last time I had two models this far from home… Well, let’s just say that I lost both models.”
The picture of Bobbie reading Watchmen appeared on the screen, the lines of her body obscured by both her hair and the graphic novel, only making the image more enticing. Bobbie laughed. “And they will look up and shout ‘Show me your tits’, and I’ll whisper ‘no’.”
“Huh?” Luka said. “I don’t understand.”
“It’s a quote from the comic.”
Mike snapped his head back. “You know that one?”
“I know all the books here.” Bobbie put a finger at the corner of her mouth. “I’m just a big nerd.”
“I only knew that Dune quote from the movie. Lynch’s photography is always so amazing.” Mike laughed.
“Then truly I must be the Kwizatz Haderach.” Bobbie smiled.
“It was nice meeting you Faye.” Luka drawled. “We must do this again sometime. You’re from Delacroix, right?”
“Yeah, where nothing changes but the seasons.”
“I’m gonna be there next week. I got an invite to a Playboy party. You could be my plus one. I don’t know anyone there…” Luka started to blush.
Bobbie grinned wickedly. “Sure, who doesn’t like a party?” They exchanged phone numbers and said their goodbyes. On her way out, Mike stopped her.
“Here’s my card. You’re going to hear from me again, for sure. I’ve seen some good models in my time, but you… you seem to know just what I want. Almost like you can see it, and that’s a rare talent, indeed.”
“Thanks, Mike.” Bobbie glanced down at her phone. She saw twelve missed calls and sixteen text messages, all from Rachel. “But, I’ve gotta go.” She flashed her phone at him. “Rach needs me apparently. This was fun.”
“See you around, Faye Valentine. I think this shoot is gonna go down in history.”
“Just like Rudolph.” Bobbie giggled and waved flirtatiously.
There was a giddiness that followed Bobbie wherever she went. Ailie popped out into the hall.
“Ye didnae think ye were leevin’ without sayin’ goobye, did ye.”
“Nay. “ Bobbie smiled. She hugged Ailie, who laughed at Bobbie’s pitch perfect version of her highlander accent. “I’ll be around, you can’t miss me. I stand out.”
“That ye do, lass. That ye do. It was a pleasure.”
“Nice working with you, Ailie.”
Bobbie felt less feverish as she strode down the hall and into the elevator. It had been a great day. Luka was cool, if a bit spacy. Ailie kept her head the whole time. Her thoughts turned to the colors she saw on people and how she had made them disappear. With her hand in her purse, she found the joint Luka had given her. Bobbie had forgotten about it, possibly the first time she’d ever forgotten about it.
Entering the elevator, Bobbie felt calm. She pushed the button for her floor and watched the doors slide closed, cutting her off from the world of glitz and beauty…
And back to Rachel.
What the hell did she want that was so important anyway?
Chapter 50
Rachel lay on the bed, her foot bound and elevated, drowsily drifting in and out of sleep. The door clicked open and her heart leapt.
“Fay-fay!” Rach saw her girlfriend and she outstretched her arms.
“Rach! What happened?”
“Mm-mmm. Come here first.” Bobbie dropped her bag and walked up to Rach, the injured girl. She saw some purple, some blue, and some yellow. Rachel aggressively hugged Bobbie.
“Where were you?” Rach sniffed. “I called and called, and texted... and…”
“I was at the shoot, which went great. So, what happened?” Bobbie asked watching the yellow flare and the blue twinkle.
“I went to get some runs in while the snow was still there, ya know… to clear my head. I launched wrong and landed worse. I called you right away and when you wouldn’t answer.”
Bobbie looked into Rach’s eyes. They were red, glassy.
“What’d they give you for the ankle?” Bobbie asked, seeing the yellow flare and fade, the blue glowing brightly.
“I dunno, but it’s good stuff.”
Bobbie looked at the bottle. She recognized the oblong pills with the ‘V’ on them.
“You always come, but when you didn’t answer.” Rach trailed off.
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Bobbie returned the hug, suddenly feeling bad that she ignored the phone. All the buzzes of the vibrating phone made sense.
“I was scared, Fay-fay.” Bobbie could see that Rach was about to cry. “I needed you and you weren’t there.”
That stung. Whether Bobbie or Faye, she always tried to be there to help. Helping people is the reason to help. The world’s myriad objects and people screaming and vying for her attention just proved to be too much for Bobbie to stay on top of.
Bobbie smoothed Rach’s blonde hair. Bobbie had always thought of Rach as a tough girl. Apparently, she’s like a baked potato. Tough on the outside, and all warm and soft on the inside.
“It’s okay. I’m here now.” She rocked Rach’s head back and forth.
“I remember thinking, ‘Faye’ll be here’.” She looked up at Bobbie, her bottom lip oscillated slightly.
“I love you, Faye.” Not Fay-fay, but Faye. “And not just a little, freakishly and irresponsibly so.” Rach was drying her eyes. She pouted. “And you missed the gay gangbangers in love from rival gangs.”
“What?” Bobbie laughed.
“Daytime TV sucks. I was stuck here, waiting for you.”
Bobbie crawled up onto the bed, careful of the injured foot. “Hey, wanna order some food? I’ve got just the thing.” She picked up the phone on the dresser and dialed. “Hello, yes I’d like to order. What? Um… two Belgian waffles and two fried chicken breasts, lots of syrup.”
Hanging up the phone, Bobbie said. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna love it.” She dove into her purse and pulled out the joint Luka gave her. Using a book of matches she found next to the phone, she lit the cylinder and inhaled.
“Faye? What the hell? Where.”
“Shh, shh.” Bobbie said, exhaling smoke. “It’s okay,” She offered the burning stick. “You trust me, don’t you?”
Rach apprehensively took the joint and inhaled deeply, causing a coughing fit. Bobbie laughed.
“Chicks can not hold de smoke, dat’s what it is.”
“Shut up!” Rach laughingly interjected. “Not my first time.” She inhaled again. “You’re lucky I love you.”
They snuggled and laughed for a little bit when the sound of room service barged in to their private world. She retrieved the cart and rolled over to the bed. Rach looked at the plate, there was a large, thick waffle topped with a fried chicken breast.
“You have to put the syrup all over everything.”
“God, babe. You must be high.”
“And you should talk.” Bobbie said, shoveling maple flavored goodness into her mouth. Rach smiled forcefully, showing her girlfriend her “Seefood Diet”, as waffle and chicken squished through her teeth.
Bobbie laughed out loud, finishing the last of her plate. As Rach finished her portion, Bobbie set aside her plate and slowly brought herself up onto her hands. She crawled closer to Rach’s face, kissing a spot of maple covered chicken stuck to her bottom lip.
Faye would say it back? Right?
“Hey.” Bobbie whispered. “Hey.”
“What.” Rach whispered back, smiling stoned eyes looking back at Bobbie.
“I love you, too.”
Rach flung her arms around Bobbie bringing her off balance, sending her crashing into her. She winced, and whimpered as her foot was moved into a bad position.
“Oh,” Bobbie started, “I’m sorry. You okay?”
“Yeah, just help me up on the bed. “Time for another pill.” Bobbie got Rach wrestled up onto the bed, taking special care to not jostle her foot. She gave Rach the pill bottle and watched her dose herself.
“Think I can get one of those cowgirl?”
“Really, Faye? You know you’re driving, right?”
Bobbie shook her head. “That’s tomorrow.” She removed her top, then her bra. She stood before Rach. “But, we still have tonight. Let’s have some fun.”
Why not? Rach thought, she shook out one of the little pills and passed it over. Bobbie swallowed it dry, and then moved in on Rach.
Bobbie and Rach tested the limits of Rachel’s ‘First degree sprain of the talofibular tendon’. The occasional cry of pain was drowned out by the cries of orgasm.
Bobbie’s, Rach’s… who knew anymore? This wasn’t the wild, reckless abandon from earlier, the injured ankle preventing the absurdist reenactment of Little Red Riding Hood that had upended most of the furniture from earlier. This was passionate, sensual. Bobbie was melting like an ice cube, the spot on her back chill and cold to an unearthly degree, returning to a normal temperature as the two young lovers lay there, spent. They passed over into unconsciousness, With Rach finding out that her girl indeed loved her back. A smile that was equal parts opoid bliss and post coital afterglow.
***
Tim woke to the smell of sausage and cinnamon rolls, and his mother gently shaking him.
“Tim, wake up. The rolls are almost done and I know you like them fresh.”
Tim looked at his mom through the sleep in his eyes. “Mom?”
She put a hand on his bared shoulder. “Glad you two had a good time and well… We still haven’t talked about that night. Bobbie told me about the card, and I just… C’mon, get up. We should do this like adults. Obviously,” She said.
“You’ve grown up a lot, and I’ve been missing it. Get dressed, see you in the living room.”
Tim threw on a shirt and some jeans. Confused and shocked, he went out in the living room.
“Mom?”
Myka was pulling the rolls out of the oven and she set them on the stove to cool. “You’re father taught me to make these. I remember you licking the spoon when you were 2. Fah-sting.” She imitated a toddler’s voice “Your dad thought it was so cute. Stephanie liked it, too. But, not as much as you did.”
Tim smiled, pouring two cups of coffee and sitting at the breakfast bar. “Mom, what the..?”
“So, Bobbie tells me that you think that the accident was your fault. I should tell you that I’ve spent the last year on that couch thinking it was mine. You cry at weird times? So do I. I don’t expect you to forgive me for the last year.”
“Mom. Don’t be silly.” Tim could feel the tears start to burn behind his eyes. “Of course I forgive you. You’re my Mom.”
Myka could also feel herself starting to cry. She couldn’t remember the last time she had done so. Tim rose and embraced his mother.
“I love you, Tim.” She sobbed.
“I love you too, Mom.” Tim cried, both the coffee and frosting forgotten.
I’m going to do this better, Myka thought.
“Now,” Myka sniffed. “Tell me everything I missed, especially about Bobbie. She’s special.”
“I know, Mom. She’s special to everyone.”
He proceeded to spend the rest of the morning telling his mom about everything that had happened to him; the drugs, the despondency, the random tears…everything.
Then he started to talk about Bobbie, and all the people and positivity that came with her, and the magic of her cooking. “When she’s around, everything seems to work. Just not lately.”
“She’s special to everyone,” He repeated. “But, she’s more special to me.”
“I know she is. You never wear that suit.”
Tim smiled, grabbing the spatula out of the frosting; he licked the frosting from one side. “Just as good as I remember it.”
“Good,” Myka said. “Eat up; because I need you help today.”
“This place is a mess.”
***
Faye woke and stretched, her face hurt. She felt the twinge of pain in her cheeks, lancing through the tired muscles. She knew why, she’d been smiling all night in her sleep. Her night with Tim was nothing short of a scene from a Jennifer Aniston movie. And seeing Myka come back to the world of the fully conscious, it felt so good to finally be able to help people around her. Maybe Justice is right, maybe this will help both of us. This little vacation in Barbieland is turning out to be one hell of a learning experience.
Bobbie’s body had its own pleasures, but she missed the swing of ‘her’ breasts. She got up and dressed herself. Entering the hallway, she found Nick sitting there on the couch, watching the morning news.
“Hey, Nick. There any coffee left?”
Nick smiled, “Hey, I can see someone’s still smiling. Wow, it must be tiring.”
“What?” Faye said, cocking an eyebrow.
“Helping everyone you meet,” Chuckling, Nick watched Faye pour the last of the coffee. “And still have time for a night on the town. Faye’s coming back tonight, and I guess school starts back up tomorrow?”
“Yeah, joy of joys. Almost Summer though. One more year…”
Nick cocked his head. “I thought you were a senior like Zoe?”
Shit! Faye remembered suddenly that Bobbie was, in fact a senior.
“Uh, yeah. Forgot I don’t go back next year. No blood in my coffee stream yet.” She hefted her Aperture Industries mug.
“Has anyone ever told you that you have a very dry sense of humor?”
“Yeah,” Faye said. “Old Spice wanted to bottle it as an antiperspirant.”
Nick laughed aloud.
“So, any new characters for me to kick your ass with yet?”
“Just a few, but I wanna clean up some before Faye gets home. She’s such a mess.”
Faye rankled at that, but had to agree, the bedroom was a mess. She saw some clothes lying around, dishes in the kitchen. Leftovers spotting the counter, and speckles of sugar and non dairy creamer shown like the map to One Eyed Willie’s treasure. Each spot seemed to have a crosshair on it that only she could see. Dead or alive, you’re coming with me… to the trash.
“I swear.” Nick laughed. “Hurricane Faye, leaving a path of destruction in her wake.” Faye’s eye twitched.
She realized her friend was right, how many times had she done something without thinking of the consequences? How many times had she accidentally hurt someone close to her? With a toss of her hair, she studied Nick.
“Well,” Faye said, downing the last of her coffee. “Let’s get to it, then.”
***
Bobbie was a little queasy when she woke, after removing her hands from her groin… Both of them this time, she surveyed the room. The previous night with Rach was unbelievable. She looked over Faye’s girlfriend, her chest rising and falling smoothly and evenly. She started looking for the personal belongings that had been scattered around the room with almost algebraic randomness. She soon had all of her things and many of Rach’s packed away into the cases they came in. She looked at the room and made a final check for their things. Coffee was ordered and Rach awakened.
“Mornin’, babe.”
Rach smiled dreamily. “MMM, morning.” She gave a stretch, one that ended with several repetitions of ‘Ow!’ and ‘Fuck!” Bobbie went to help up the injured girl.
“I’ve already packed, got everything, I think. Just wanted to grab some breakfast before we left.”
“So glad I caught you. You take good care of me.” Rach fished out another Vicodin. “Just make sure you don’t go all Grand Theft Auto on the freeway.”
“Well, how else am I supposed to drive?” Bobbie smiled. “Where do you think I learned from?”
“I’ve ridden with you in the EVO enough to know that you can drive, babe” Rach sipped her latte, swallowing the pill.
Bobbie was worried about this, she briefly considered calling Faye to come and get them. Robb had never learned the art of vehicle operation. Anything more complicated than a bicycle was as confusing as a paragliding cow.
After eating, showering, and one last quickie, Bobbie grabbed her suitcase and shouldered Rach’s duffel bag, she pouted as she looked back on the room. That was fun, like the old days…
The old days, why were her memories of that time so bad, anyway?
They soon reached the parking area, taking longer than usually with Rach’s foot. It took seemingly forever to get everything in the back and Rach into a comfortable reclining position. Rach gave Bobbie the keys and she slowly, pulled out of the parking space and pulled on the empty road.
For the first few miles, Bobbie was trepidatious about every small move, the bouncy vehicle occasionally slamming Rach’s ankle into the door.
“Sorry.” Bobbie said, fighting like hell to keep the vehicle in the lane. She was glad that she was doing this now, rather than in the heavy traffic that would encompass the freeways into Delacroix later. She caught a look in the mirror and noticed that the extensions had started to come out. Bobbie quickly looked up Shear Ecstasy and dialed the number before sticking the phone in her cleavage.
“Hey, Frankie” I was wondering if I could get an appointment for later this afternoon? Great, I have to get these extensions fixed. Awesome… see you then. Name’s Faye Valentine…
Rach drifted in and out of sleep during the drive. Terrifying the SUV’s owner more than once.
The first stop for gas and snacks was simple enough. Bobbie stretching out her itching back and helping Rach to the bathroom was what took up most of the trip. She left Rach in the bathroom while she selected snacks and beverages for the next leg of the trip that was seemingly taking forever.
She had gotten used to driving well enough quickly enough by completely ignoring Rach. Grand Theft Auto was exactly what she needed to do. There was a slight difference, but not much from an escort mission where stealth was more important than speed.
Rach was super important to Faye; Bobbie could see that much, just as Faye was important to Rach. A weird symbiotic relationship between the two…
She said she loved me…her. She thought of Tim for a moment. Was great while it lasted…
Until he got that sweet handjob from Roxx.
All the good memories scattered instantly. She looked over at Rach. Maybe Faye’s on to something, maybe a girlfriend next…
HONK!
The loud horn blasted Bobbie back into her normal plane of existence. A green Prius zipped by displaying a lack of power. Jeez, am I driving that slowly? In response, Bobbie stomped the accelerator. She zipped by the Prius, narrowly avoiding a collision with the hybrid.
“Faye!” Rach shrieked awake, frantically grabbing for the safety grip and wedging her good foot against the dashboard.
“Sorry, sweet cheeks.” Bobbie took her eyes off of the road for a second. “Just realized how slow we were going.”
“Jesus, keep your eyes on the road.” Rach blurted. What the hell is wrong with her? She swallowed a gulp of water and started to relax as Bobbie swerved back into the middle of the lane. Bobbie moved the suburban tank to the right and pulled off the freeway. Bobbie started to squirm in her seat as that spot on her back started to burn again.
The second stop had Rach crutching herself to the bathroom, the scare with the Prius leaving her a little shaky. Bobbie checked her hair in the rearview and strode confidently to pump. The quick refuel got them back on the road, with Bobbie determined to get home. The driving was kind of fun, but it was getting old fast. Some tacos and another dose of pain medication for Rach later, the Delacroix offramp came into view
***
Rach had been asleep for the better part of an hour, out cold. Vicodin and stress keeping her in a deep sleep while her body healed. Her mouth was dry like burnt toast, her eyes equally arid. It was stuffy and dim in the car. Her hip was aching from the lack of blood flow, and her ankle throbbing. The column of drool moistened the right side of her chin. She looked around.
“What the..?” She looked around, since the sun was almost down wondering where the hell she was. Stretching up she could see the blue neon of The Curious Cabinet in the distance. She could see that she was parked in a handicapped space in front of Shear Ecstasy.
Grabbing her phone she dialed. “What the hell is going on, Faye?” She said to no one in particular. “What are we…am I doing here?”
“Hey, hey. It’s Faye, leave a message, okay?
“Godammit.” Rach hissed through gritted teeth.
Again?? Her thoughts carried concern as she lay there, uncomfortable.
****
Bobbie was laughing and chatting with Frankie while she sat under the dryer. The extensions had been an easy fix. They weren’t sewn in as well, but Frankie had quickly seen to that. What Bobbie wanted was to change that interminable purple streak, that was also simple. Bobbie paid the bill and got back out to the car quickly. The sooner she got home, the better.
When she got out to the car, the first thing she noticed was that Rach was visibly upset.
“Again, babe? Seriously? You just left me in the car while you…” She noticed that the purple streak that once curved down around her cheek was now a bright green. Faye has never gone to a salon in the entire time I’ve known her. “…had to get your hair done? What the hell?”
Bobbie pouted. “Sorry, just wanted to get prettied up before school tomorrow…”
Rach sighed heavily. “Just get me home, this was not the getaway I was planning.”
“Hair looks good though.” Rach harrumphed, crossing her arms she stared silently. You’re really lucky I love you.
They got to Rach’s house, which was surprisingly empty. Bobbie got Rach up to her bedroom, helped her with pillow placement and called Nick.
“I need to go, school tomorrow.” Bobbie reached in for an awkward hug. She kissed Rach’s forehead. There was a tension in the air; neither of them knew what to say. The late evening silence was thankfully ended by the loud entrance of the Camaro.
***
Bobbie ducked into the car and watched Rach’s bedroom light as they pulled away.
“So, how was your gig?” Nick asked, smiling goofily. “And what’s with the hair?”
Bobbie smiled. “Fine, Rach hurt her ankle. But the shoot was good, got a party to go to this week. How’s Bobbie?”
“She’s just great. We’ve been hanging out. Then she had that date with Tim…”
Bobbie whipped her head around. “What?”
“Yeah, it looks like they’re getting back together. It looks like he really loves her, y’know?’ Nick pulled into the driveway and cut the engine. What the fuck are you doing Faye? Tim? Son of a Bitch. The streetlights were passing by in rhythmic fashion. Bobbie sighed, looking out at the night. She dreaded going back to school. There was a slightly grey cast to the sidewalk from the rising moon. She considered not going briefly, but wanted to see what the world was like for Faye. That’s what the point of this is, isn’t it?
Wrestling her luggage out of the car, Bobbie got the roller bag into the house. It was late enough for some people to start dropping off and early enough for the late night parties to start up. Frowning and wishing she could be a part of it tonight, she made her way into Faye’s room. Inside, she saw her body sleeping peacefully. Bobbie began stripping off her clothes. It had become far more comfortable to sleep naked, especially with how she found her hands every morning. She smiled a sinister snarl.
“HEY!” Bobbie bounced her naked form on top of Faye, who was likewise naked. Faye scrambled to get the red sheets up over her body, Bobbie jerking them away at the last second. She swept her hand out to tweak a nipple. Faye’s face contorted into one of surprise.
“FUCK!...”Faye shrieked. “Bobbie.” She whispered.
Bobbie laughed and allowed Faye to gather the blankets. “And what did you do to my hair?”
“Part of the shoot, I like it. Decorating the walls, remember?” A hunger flashed behind the purple eyes. “Rach likes it, too.”
“Hmmm.” Faye said. Looking out of the blue eyes she was now comfortable with. “So, how was your shoot? Boring, I bet.”
Bobbie grinned broadly, “Not one bit. That was so fun. It was like I could see exactly what they wanted, so it went over well. Rach sprained her ankle pretty badly. I had to drive home.”
“Drive? You?” Faye showed considerable concern. “Rach? She okay?”
“Yeah.” Bobbie waved her hand dismissively. “Just high as hell on painkillers. She sprained her ankle on her snowboard; she can’t put any pressure on it.”
Faye pouted. “Oh, Rach.” Her look turned stern. “Anything else happen?”
Bobbie cut her off. “You wanna tell me about your date?” Bobbie’s face turned more stern.
Faye smiled, reminded of that magical evening. “Yeah. He loves you, you know? He’s better because of you. I can only imagine what everyone else is like simply because you showed up.”
“And…” Faye’s smile evaporated. “I spoke with Justice.”
Bobbie paled. “What?”
“I asked her how long this was going to go on.” Faye said as she pulled on Bobbie’s Depeche Mode shirt and looked for the blue panties she had worn to bed. “Something about ‘until you learn what you’re fighting against.’”
“Fuckin’ Justice, never could get a straight answer from her. Did you rip her eyes out?”
“No,” Faye said. “She wouldn’t let me.”
“Surprised that stopped you.” Bobbie wrinkled her nose. “Well, we better get some sleep. Ooh, tomorrow’s gonna be fun.”

“Yeah, gobs.” Faye grabbed a blanket and crawled back into bed. “Somehow, I’m always the one with the trashed reputation.”
“Room for one more?” Bobbie asked devilishly.
Faye rolled her eyes and prepared herself for a long night.
Chapter 51
School was starting again, and Beth was looking through her closet. The money from Cheepskates had scored her a few more outfits. She hadn’t seen Bobbie in days, nor anyone else since the failed intervention with Kim. Her ankle still hurt, the open wound replaced by an angry red gash that had scabbed over. Steve had been by a lot, rebandaging her wound and generally making sure that she was okay. He’s so sweet, she thought, grabbing the red dress that he liked so much. Tim had called her and told her that they’d be needed at the bakery today after school. He’d seen Bobbie, so she knew she’d see her friend at lunch today.
“Ready, Beth?” Roy called from the living room.
“Be right there, Daddy.”
***
Kim didn’t want to go to school. She felt terrible, there was a cough. There were aches and pains. She swallowed the last white pill and decided to go. Kurt’ll know where to get some more if I can’t find Roxx. She missed Roxx, but knew she’d see her today. She flipped open her phone to see the texts she had sent. They had all been answered with the same reply.
Still out of town, back by school. Miss ya.
Kim rolled out of bed and coughed all the way down the hallway and into the shower.
***
Roxx looked at the phone. She smiled when she saw all the texts Kim had sent. It was a shame she was so used up, it had been fun while it lasted. She had thought of moving on, but wanted to finish The Advocate… Bobbie… Robb.
Once she’s broken, it’ll all be mine for the taking.
She grinned, and checked her makeup for flaws before she shimmied out the door, excited to put an end to this Advocate nonsense.
Then I can set about the real work. Roxx fought the urge not to squeal with delight as she stepped out into the crisp morning.
***
Heather had totally ruined her makeup. Her eyeliner branching out in ragged, tiny lightning bolts where she had lost concentration. For some strange reason, she’d been lounging around the house for a week. The makeup error felt as if it was almost like she was out of practice or something. Little was said, due to her lack of company. Heather, like Kim, didn’t want to go to school. She had ignored her phone, and all of the related text messages, preferring to be alone. She missed Kim, Amber, and Bella as well. Scrubbing off the old makeup to start new, she smiled a little at the thought of how Beth and Steve had hit it off so well. At least someone was with the right person. Starting with the foundation again, she tried to perk up, although school was the farthest thing from her mind.
***
Faye had both pillows clamped over her head; Bobbie had been making unearthly noises followed by squishy sounds. And, to Faye’s ear there was some kind of discordant, screaming soul quality behind the cries of pleasure. Christ, is that what I sound like? Poor Nick. The noise stopped shortly before Bobbie sat up and stretched. Releasing the pillows and finally allowing herself to hear the real world without any kind of damper.
“Pleasant dreams?” Faye asked dryly. Bobbie cocked her head downward and curled up one side of her mouth into a twisted rictus.
“You would know,” Bobbie widened here eyes. “There’s worse ways to wake up. Think Nick made coffee?” Bobbie asked, shaking her head back and refastening her ponytail. Faye shot her a distasteful look.
“We’re gonna have to have a talk about the hair. And that color, what were you thinking?”Faye examined the longer hair she now sported. “If Nick made coffee, he made it for you. Well, who he thinks is you… you know what I mean. Dammit, this is complicated.”
“Yeah.” Bobbie said, stretching again. “What do you want to do for breakfast?”
It was Faye’s turn to grin. “You get the coffee, There’s quite a bit of pastry around here. I recommend the banana bread,” She smirked and jiggled her head proudly. “The bagels aren’t bad, either.”
During their makeshift breakfast, Bobbie saw her throwing random vegetables in a blender. She poured the spicy smelling concoction over a beef roast that sat atop onions in the suddenly popular crock pot. “Well, that’s dinner.” Faye declared. “We should get ready, don’t want to be late for your first day. Do you?” Bobbie rolled her eyes.
Watching each other get dressed, it could be seen from space that neither girl was happy with the other’s choices in clothing. Faye still upset about the emerald green streak that trailed too far down. Extensions? What the hell happened up there?
A tinny horn honked from outside. Bobbie knew that sound. “Date must have been something else for you to be all cuddly on the back of that thing.
With a dismissive gesture and a click of her tongue, Faye turned away from Bobbie long enough to hide the goofy grin she could feel starting. “That’s my ride. Nick’ll be up to take you in a minute. Just tell him that he has to buy cream cheese today.” Faye turned and walked out the door. Bobbie felt a twinge of disappointment as she watched Faye walk out the door and off to face the rest of the student body of Delacroix High.
***
Tim was again shocked by what Bobbie had chosen to wear. All that time with Faye had started to show, with the blue streak in her hair and now with the low rise jeans and the midriff baring top hanging off of one shoulder. He found himself staring at her navel. He’d seen it before, but only on video. He put that thought out of his mind as she walked up to him. He noticed the metallic blue film reel barrettes holding her hair over one of her tiny ears. A hug and a peck on the cheek greeted him as Faye accepted Bobbie’s helmet and boarded the Vespa, the young couple rolled off into the slightly breezy morning.
***
“Ah, young love.” Nick said, staring out the window. Bobbie jumped, startled. Her breasts jiggled inside the tight top as she spun to face him. Bobbie wrinkled Faye’s face as she realized that he must have done something to bowl Faye over so completely. Something insanely romantic. Jealous, she looked at Nick with narrowed gaze. She saw something different, his greens pulsating in time with his violets. His yellow flared as he noticed her looking. Jealous, horny… scared when he saw me looking. The color scheme of all the ribbons and rags she could see suddenly all made sense. He really needs to get laid. The violet overtook the yellow as it faded.
Bobbie had started to make sense of this crazy color spectrum while up on the mountain. She saw how she affected people, making both Mike and Luka’s otherworldly colors disappear. It had started to make sense lately, to the point of understanding the colors and what they meant, well some of it anyway.
“Like the world doesn’t have enough Stepford people.” Bobbie said, hoping she was nailing the patented Faye snark.
“Be nice, Faye.” Nick said, pouring coffee and grabbing a bagel. “She’s too sweet, and after everything that’s happened… She deserves it.”
Nick was looking for the cream cheese, fumbling through the cheap storage bowls. Bobbie stared after him, studying the colors. The green undertone to the blues and violets slid around hallucinatorily.
“Bobbie said you need cream cheese.”
“Yeah,” Nick admitted. “We kind of killed it yesterday after the bagels were done. Seriously, I never want to see those lousy ones they sell at the school again.”
Bobbie was annoyed with all this talk of bagels. Good, now she can do all the baking.
“So, that’s what you’re wearing? Dressing down a little?”
Bobbie looked down at herself. She had obviously been too conservative for Faye, just as she had shown more skin than Bobbie normally would. Bobbie looked down at the olive pencil skirt she’d found in Faye’s closet, and a plain white top.
“Hey.” Bobbie pointed at Nick. “Shut up. So, we out of here or what?”
“What.” Nick said. “Definitely what, I understand that you don’t want to park the EVO there, but this getting me out of bed is ridiculous. How did I become a parent while a still a virgin?”
Still a virgin? Geez.
Nick chewed the last bite of bagel and grabbed his keys. “Alright.” He sighed. “Let’s get your highness to school.
Bobbie wiggled her way out to the car and sat in the passenger seat, thankful that she didn’t have to drive.
***
Faye was sitting in English class, she decided to use this time as a preview of what lay ahead. Mr. Lesko was turning out to be exceedingly dull, monotonously expounding on verbosity and verisimilitude.
Algebra was similarly dull, mostly due to the teacher being a baseball coach. In fact, Faye had pretty much resigned herself to her senior year being just as dull as she remembered it being for Kane.
It was lunchtime when she finally went to take the final exam in Bobbie 101. They were all there; Amber, Bella, Beth, and Heather. Faye cataloged the look on their faces as she approached the table. Jesus, where’s Scooby?
Heather was the first to speak. “Bobbie? What the hell happened?”
Faye looked at Heather. “Decided to not and not look like Taylor Swift for a bit.”
Heather pouted. “I was going for Mamie Van Doren. Doesn’t matter,” She shook her head. “Where have you been? My phone was missing all week and I had this new outfit I was working on…” Heather lied; not wanting her calm, cool, and collected image to crack in front of her comrades.
Beth used this moment to interject. “Daddy told me that Sylvia threw you out? What happened?” Beth showed so much concern on her face; one might think her puppy was sick.
Faye opened her sandwich. “She found out about the video. It’s casual, I’ve been bunking with Faye.”
“It shows. Looks like she’s been dressing you, too.” Heather studied Faye’s outfit.
Bella had a different opinion. “Nice. Fuckin’ badass. Dig the hair color.”
Heather shot a look at Bella.
“So, that’s why you called me.” Amber said, polishing her glasses on her sleeve. “If you need a place, I’ve got room.”
“It’s fine. Faye’s nice, and you all met Nick. It’s been a learning experience.” Faye stated. You have no idea. There was some minor chatter, but Faye was surviving. She smiled, looking at the Scooby gang that she inherited.
It would be really cool to have a talking dog.
“Tim fuckin’ told me about Roxx.” Bella said. “Fuck her. I fuckin’ swear…”
“Yes.” Faye interrupted. “You do. A lot. But, yeah. Fuck her.”
Heather and Beth looked shocked.
“What? After everything she’s like, the last fuck I have to give.”
Beth and Amber laughed, Bella was stunned, and Heather seemed distant. When the bell rang, Faye walked away from Bobbie’s friends.
Nailed it!
***

Bobbie’s day was more eventful. Everyone stared at her, the world was a blur of colors. Knowing what they meant now, everything seemed different. Most of the classes Faye took were simple enough. But Geometry was killing her, she wanted to stab Mr. Agee with the point end of a compass and then slit her own wrists with a protractor.
“Miss Valentine!” Mr. Agee’s voice blew her back to reality like a cannonball.
“Hmmm.” Bobbie looked up, distracted.
“Would you like to share whatever is so interesting with the rest of the class?”
Bobbie looked at him, she could see that he’d been cute, probably in college. All of his colors had the slightest ochre hue behind them, some greens, and a new color that looked like a peachy orange. Scared and sad, probably just acts all superior just to feel important, probably a jock in another life. She remembered the jocks from Delacroix High 1.0
“Did it have to do with congruent triangles?” Mr. Agee’s face reddened.
“Maybe.” Bobbie grinned. “I’ll try any angle.” The class laughed, which served to irritate Mr. Agee more.
“Try any angle, huh?” The teacher barked, his slightly doughy face screwing into something approximating rage. “Well, then, In that case.” He walked over to his oversized desk. Here, in this room. I’m the Right Angle.” He grabbed a form from the top drawer and started scribbling on it.
“There, in that chair. You’re just being obtuse. That’s a detention for you. Now, would you like to join the rest of us?” He separated the copies and held it up, the class laughed again, louder this time. The three genius freshmen in the front row cackling. He ripped off the top copy and ceremoniously carried it to her.
Fucking great. More school. Bobbie shifted uncomfortably in her seat. This wasn’t the first altercation with a teacher. Robb had had many, and Bobbie felt all the old rage bubble up, her back tingling slightly.
Next time, Gadget… Next time! She looked at Mr. Agee. They’d talk again.
Count on it.
When the bell finally rang, Bobbie had finished the homework, and made damn sure to place it on Mr. Agee’s desk… with a smile.
Lunch had Bobbie sitting off to one side, wondering how best to dispose of a male math teacher. She stared out at the glow of the dining student body. Like a weather map colors conglomerated together, fading to a complimentary counterpart in another adjacent area.
A bobbing black hood approached her, the red interior of the hoodie she was wearing contrasting sharply against the black of its exterior. Both colors combined could barely contain the chaotic maelstrom of colors that remained ensconced inside. Zoe; not a Rachel fan. Faye’s best friend, the devil to Rach’s angel…angel. Bobbie started thinking about zombies just to get the pictures of angels and demons out of her head.
The hood snapped to the left in a moment of eerie prescience. “Faye?” Zoe was stunned as evidenced by the tone of her voice. “Like the hair.” Zoe pulled out one of the ever present headphones out of her ears, leaving it to dangle playfully in front of her plain shirt. “Fully joining the glambots this summer?” The tiny sound of drum and bass loops stopped as she tapped the player off.
“How was your week? I got stuck at my aunt’s house. Dad took my car after the last party I snuck out to.” She pulled the one headphone still in her ear. “So, were you going for punk secretary today? You know the war’s over, right?” She let it drop, the buds clicking together like a Newton’s Cradle.
Bobbie shrugged. “Oh, I had that shoot up at Forbes, Rach sprained her ankle pretty badly. And the war never against stupid never ends.”
“It just gets sexier.” Bobbie batted her lashes.
Zoe laughed a courtesy laugh. “Oh! Your friend?” She snapped her fingers three times rapidly. “Cupcake girl…”
Bobbie perked up. “Bobbie? What about her?”
Zoe’s subbass chortling continued, “I guess Stacy entered this costume contest at the theater. She lost. She tried to take it out on Bobbie and her boyfriend.” The chortling continued, raising an octave whenever Zoe started to speak. “She smartassed her way into making her back down. What I would have given to see that. Imagine shutting Stacy down without a single punch.”
Boyfriend? She was going to have to talk to Faye about that. That wasn’t her decision. Bobbie frowned into her sandwich. The bread was really good, and fresh. Looking, she noticed the irregularity of the edges. Faye made this.
“So, seeing Rach after school?”
Bobbie looked up from her sandwich and shook her head. “Got detention today. Agee’s an asshole.”
“Gotta agree there. Had him last year. He still using that Right Angle/ Obtuse thing?” Zoe said.
Bobbie turned Faye’s mouth into a tight, straight line. “Now it’s just less clever than I thought it was.”
“So, everything okay with Bobbie there?” Zoe finished her sandwich. “Poor girl’s been through the wringer lately.”
“Apart from drowning in frosting and butter? Yeah.”
The bell rang and Zoe said something about seeing her later and ran off down the hall. The rest of her day was spent daydreaming and thinking about how boring school was. It turned out that the later Zoe was talking about was detention. Bobbie’s jaw went slack. Zoe waved. “Was late to fifth period. Y’know, busy putting up graffiti in the girl’s room. Didn’t think you were gonna have to do this alone, did you?”
Bobbie smiled, Zoe truly is her friend. The hour passed quickly, with homework to do and clocks at which to stare. Faye had told her all about her weekend while Zoe seemed only mildly interested. The tomboyish girl perked up when she went into detail about Rach’s accident.
“Gravity is a harsh mistress.” Zoe tossed off the remark like a used tissue. Faye had told Bobbie how like oil and vinegar; they did not mix. With high emphasis on the not.
Heading away from the adolescent prison camp, Zoe’s phone vibrated. She looked at it quizzically. She slid the phone on and said a shaky hello.
“Bobbie? Hi.” She looked at Bobbie and knitted her eyebrows. “Yeah, I guess. Faye and I are headed there now.” She nodded at Bobbie in the negative. “Cool cool, later.” She plunged the phone back into her pocket. “Bobbie wants to talk to me, I guess? Weird, But I guess after that Stacy thing she might be itching for some payback. How did she get my number?”
“Hmmh. She must have gotten it from my phone.” Bobbie remembered Faye telling her the story of how Zoe got her number from Rach. She couldn’t imagine this being any more confusing, for anyone. If this whole thing ever shook out, there would be awkwardness on a level not seen since the last Ice Age. She shrugged the thought off while Zoe started to talk about some party that was happening at the cemetery sometime during the week.
The itch on her back was starting to bug her again. She kept wishing Zoe would stick her with a Gom Jabbar just to stop the itching, knowing that the poisoned needle would provide sweet relief from the hellacious itching that came in fits and starts. Bobbie noticed it more when she was bored.
But she couldn’t be bored, not with her world full of twisting rainbows and a constant endorphin rush that couldn’t seem to plateau. Bobbie remembered the first time she had worn a dress, she laughed to herself as she pictured herself stepping into the garment. This is your power armor now. The bakesale seemed like a lifetime ago, as did the simpler time when Sylvia had braided her hair.
But, everything was so exciting, so intense now. Rach, the modeling, Luka, even getting the better of Mr. Agee felt like chocolate coated, deep fried joy. Zoe was still talking about the party when they finally entered Zoe’s SUV.
“Party sounds like fun. Sure, I’ll go.” Bobbie said, scratching her back on the broken tortilla fragments that were permanently enmeshed in the fabric of the passenger seat.
***
“My God, Bobbie. Think you baked enough? You could probably just bake all the Girl Scout Cookies.” Zoe laughed, grabbing a slice of banana bread from one of the many plates that had a veritable smorgasbord of baked items. “All of them.” She repeated, this time sounding maniacal. “So, like I was telling Faye, there’s a party this week out at the cemetery, DJ Plugman is set to make a return. Should be a good time. Supposedly, if this one goes well and the cops don’t show up, they’ll hold the grad party there. They use one of those abandoned warehouses every year, and it’s just too hot in there. Cemetery’s far enough away and just cool enough to be a good idea.”
Faye was loving this idea, her blue eyes sparkled at the thought of a good wild party, looking at Zoe, she blurted out. “Hey, Zoe. I was wondering if you could do me a favor?”
“Bobbie,” Zoe said, her voice thick with banana bread. “Let me take some of this stuff home with me and you can have anything you want.”
“Good.” Faye said, looking past her blonde hair. “Think you can get me Stacy’s cheerleading uniform?” Zoe coughed, an errant chunk of walnut flew through the air to land on the carpet.
“What?” Both Zoe and the Bobbie inside of Faye snapped their heads up to look at the Faye inside of Bobbie. “I think I can pull off the outfit. And I owe her just a little.” She shrugged
“Bobbie.” Zoe said, grinning like a cat with a cornered mouse. “You’re one badass chick. Subtle, I like it. Shouldn’t be a problem.” Faye knew that Stacy would be at the party. Zoe had been regaling her with tales of how Stacy wasn’t adjusting to not being a big fish very well ever since her first semester saw her being just another person, the loss of her celebrity paining her.
Seeing her cheerleader outfit on the girl who got one over on her in public: Priceless.
Faye looked at everyone as thoughts of driving Stacy into a psychopathic rage usually reserved for victims of high level gamma exposure just made her day that much better. “So,” She said. “Who’s staying for dinner? I have barbacoa cooking, there’s tortillas, and everything else.”
Bobbie looked at the body she inhabited just a week ago, she studied her color scheme. It was all over the place, hard to get a bead on. Damn Sniper Wolf and her Diazepam… Burritos were rolled, some better than others. Everything was delicious. Bobbie was glad for once that she didn’t have to do it, further glad that it was just as good. The bodyswapped girl felt at home in this new skin oddly…
…if only that damn itching would stop once and for all.
Faye’s phone played the familiar dubstep tone that announced its usefulness. Bobbie looked at the screen and jumped, feeling suddenly excited.
“Hi, Luka.” Bobbie looked at the others enjoying their spicy repast nervously. “I need to take this, be are be.” Hey, what’s going on?” Her voice trailed off as she disappeared down the short hallway.
Luka? Need to take this? What the fuck is going on, Bobbie? Faye wondered what was going on with her, something was off. Since she and Rach came back from the shoot, there’s been an off kilterness about her. God, she just wanted to see Rach. More than that, she wanted to see her without it being weird. She looked down the hallway as she saw Bobbie stare back down the hallway, closing the door behind her, cutting off the rest of what she had to say.