previously

The answer he gave me would have frozen my heart in place, had it not already been stagnant. As it was, I had to fight myself to keep from laughing at the same time.

“Enough to break the ice. Hi, name’s Frankie, nice to meet you. Are you new around here?”

“Um... yes?” I said as I turned around. With everything that had been going on, there was one thing that had slipped my mind when I had walked into this store. Vick’s parents owned the only music store in town. How could I have been so stupid? Thinking quickly, I flashed him a small smile that hopefully said that I wasn’t interested, but appreciated the thought and went back to the guitar I was looking at.

“Anything I can help you find, miss?” He asked me.

“Yeah, actually there is. What can you tell me about this guitar?” I asked in response, still very much unsure of myself and wondering just where in the world Darcy had run off to.

“It’s a good guitar for learning how to play, but not much else.”

“Oh. Then what would you recommend for someone who knows how to play rather well?” I asked as I gave him a looking over. He was about as tall as I used to be, with these broad, sexy shoulders and those... No. Just no.

“Is something wrong, miss?” Apparently, he noticed my embarrassment at my train of thought.

“Oh... No, not at all. I was just lost in thought for a moment. Sorry.”

“You’re fine.” He said with a friendly smile that made me... No. Still not going there! “If you’ll follow me, I can show you some of the better models that the store carries.”

I followed him over to the other side of the store where there was a small booth set up for people to try the instruments. Luckily, he didn’t notice my insecurity with just how bouncy my new equipment was up top. He walked into the booth and after looking at a few of the guitars on the bottom row, pulled a simple looking one from its peg.

“Here, try this one out.” He said as he handed the instrument to me. As I took it and inspected the price tag, he pulled me up a stool to sit on. I took a seat and ran through some warm up scales and played a random tune.

“There you are! Girl, has anyone told you that you are really good at disappearing?” Darcy said as she finally came to my rescue. “Let’s get going, we’ve got other places that we need to get to, you know.”

I returned him the guitar and made to take off with Darcy before he could try anything else. I almost made it too.

“Hey, if you’re not busy later, I could show you around town if you’d like?” He asked. Drat. I knew that I couldn’t avoid feeding, and the things that Darcy told me usually go along with it, but I was damned well going to try. I soo wasn’t ready for that just yet.

“Not tonight big guy, but maybe some other time. She and I have a bit too much planned for today." Darcy answered for me. This time, I was the one hurrying her along. I managed to bustle her outside and down the street a bit before I stopped and turned on her.

“Now, please tell me what just happened.” I asked her. I was not happy that she made that decision for me. I may be new to being a vampire and a woman, but I wasn’t exactly a toddler either.

“Well... He was a hottie and if I’ve got you pegged right, you were kind of digging him.” Damn. Did she read my mind or something? “That’s okay, but you need to be careful. You don’t want to know what happens if we get attached to our food source.”

This last reason floored me a bit. All she did, though, was giggle at me.

“What? Did you think that you were going to feed from the pouches forever?”

“Actually, I kind of did.” I answered. It took her a moment or two to recompose herself before she could talk again. Ya know, this girl really knows how to do a number on a person’s ego.

“Oh, not at all sweetie.” She said once she did finally regain herself. “We have to feed from humans. Men, to be specific. A woman’s blood just doesn’t have the right stuff in it. And it’s best when it’s fresh from the tap, if you catch my meaning there.”

One word: Eww! Even though Frankie had looked delici... NO! Bad me! Bad!

“From what I’ve been told, every new sister that is converted without wanting to be a female goes through something like this. If you need any help with it after tonight, just go ask Josephine. I’m told it took her about twenty years before she finally got with a man for the first time.” She said. “Look, girl, it’s best to just accept it and roll with it. Now let’s get you some clothes sister.”

She grabbed my hand and led me towards the fashion boutique a few shops down where she fed my measurements to the sales lady. After looking me over and asking Darcy a few questions that I didn’t pay much attention to, they proceeded throughout the little store like a pair of large cats on the hunt or something.

I looked around and I couldn’t help feeling very out of place in this store. I didn’t feel like I was supposed to be here. Then I realized that I was in fact a girl now and not the guy I was about a week ago, which explained why I wasn’t getting any weird looks for being in alone in a women’s clothing store. Not even five minutes later and Darcy’s return broke me out of my musings. She grabbed my hand and drags me back to the dressing rooms.

“I’ve gotta warn you girl, you may not like some of these things, but it’s about as good as we could do here.” She said with an apologetic look on her face. I saw why quickly enough. Most of it looked like it was made from rejected material from some kind of Vanilla Ice music video. In other words: Eww?

“Um, most of that isn’t really my style, Darcy. Sorry.” I told her with what I hoped was an apologetic look. “I’m more into the grunge look, actually.”

I had no idea how I knew that made a mental note to ask about it as soon as we got back to the house. I was getting sick of worrying about the CIA mind control kind of crap.

“Well then, have a look through and pick out what you like, then I’ll try and find more for you based on that.” She said. To be honest, she looked rather annoyed with Darcy for having pulled so many pieces of clothes only to have to put most of them right back and I couldn’t blame her in the least.

I went over and picked through and found the least expensive pants and... Why was the word “tops” coming to my mind? I quickly chalked it up as one more example to use when I approached my creator about just what in the world was going on with me.

Mostly it was just tank tops and jeans but there were a few skirts mixed in that I would have thought looked good on a girl a week ago. Now that it was me that was going to be wearing them, I wasn’t too sure. The tops, I was told, had a built in bra, for when I “felt too lazy to dig up a clean bra to wear.” Which worked just fine for me, at least until I either got used to wearing girl’s clothing or went insane. The only bras they had in stock that would fit me were sports bras (according to the label) and they looked straight forward enough, so I wasn’t too worried about having trouble with them.

I looked around, thinking that I might be able to do a bit better at figuring out what I wanted than two people that didn’t even know me. Then, a tee shirt on a mannequin in the corner caught my eye. It was an old Misfits shirt that was solid black with two skeletal arms that wrapped around the sides from the back and the hands looked like they were cupping certain parts of the mannequin’s fake anatomy.

Now, I know that I just recently acquired the right bits to make use of a shirt like that, but I’ve always thought it looked cool, so I snagged the sales lady to get it for me. During that short wait, Darcy slid up next to me.

“I think you’re going to fit right in, girl.” She whispered with a warm smile. “But I’d still like to have a little chat with you once we get outside. Don’t worry, though. It’s nothing bad, I promise.”

I gave her a nod in reply and stepped closer to the sales lady to get the shirt. It was a medium, so it was going to have to stretch out before it would fit comfortably, but that was okay with me. I quickly went back to the changing room to try it on, per Darcy’s orders, and was a happy camper when I saw the hands were lined up perfectly with where they were supposed to be on my body.

That’s when I caught just what it was that I was doing. Oh. My. God. I actually took a seat on the small bench chair thing and decided that my creator definitely messed with my head when she remade me. And that I was going to need to talk to her about it, even if I was scared to death at the prospect of giving a lady that could probably strike fear in the heart of a Navy Seal a piece of my mind.

After changing back into the shirt that Darcy had loaned me, I went back out and paid for everything and left for the Guardian after getting everything secured to the storage rack on the back. Luckily for me, the Guardian had just opened for the day so I took us there instead of off to another shop. We entered, got a small drink each, and took a seat away from the small group of people that were in the place.

“Ok girl, spill. You know you’re not done shopping yet, so what gives?” Darcy asked, somewhat annoyed that her fun had been impeded on.

“Questions that need answers is what.” I said. I hadn’t meant for it to come out short like that, but put yourself in my shoes. How would you react if you believed that someone did to you what the tin-foil-hat-wearing nut jobs have been saying the CIA has doing for years? That’s what I thought.

“Oh? Like what?” She asked, a bit more interested now.

“For starters, I’ve never found guys to be attractive before. Why did I have to struggle so hard to not rape that sales dude in the music store?” I said rather pointedly. “Secondly, that shirt that I picked out, when I went to try it on, I was actually happy that the hands lined up with my new body almost perfectly when I think I should have still been freaking out. What the shit is going on here?”

“Probably because you were that attracted to him and I have no idea, actually. In that order, by the way.” She said with an almost thoughtful look on her face. “Didn’t you want to be a woman? Normally, the gift is only given to those who would want it, so I had assumed that you had.”

“Not in the least. Actually, it never even crossed my mind. I was happy with what I was. All that I was unhappy about were the deaths of my human parents and my best friend before becoming... this .” I said as I gestured to my new body. “I think I need to get back to the house. Soon.”

“That might be wise.” She said as she snagged my drink before I could even get any of it (the bitch) and ushered me outside and back on the scooter. I almost certain that I broke some kind of record and maybe a law or two in getting home so quickly. We got the new clothes unloaded and into the room. Then I parked Darcy on her bed.

“Where’s Mother at normally at this time of day?” I asked.

“Around here, somewhere would be my best bet. Go ask around for her.” She answered as I hung my head with a sigh.

“Alright, but if I get eaten alive, I’m going to haunt you forever. You do realize that, right?” I said as I turned on my heel and went to find the source of my current problems. Turns out I didn’t have to go very far at all. She was just sitting in the common room, almost like she was waiting for me.

“You look confused about something, love. Take a seat and let’s talk about it.” She said, patting the cushion next to her. So that’s exactly what I did. I even crossed my legs like a woman would, too. That was a bit unnerving because I hadn’t really thought about doing that all day, but when I thought back on it, I had at the Guardian as well. Don’t get me wrong, I assume that girls are supposed to when they wear a skirt, for obvious reasons, but I never had those reasons and so wasn’t used to the need to do it.

“Well, I don’t really know how to say it without thinking I’m going to make you mad. Obviously, I don’t want that, but I’m wondering if you maybe changed anything else when you changed me into what I am now.” I said. I was a little annoyed by how meekly that came out, but looking back, it was the best that I could hope for.

“Not at all, darling. I would never do such a thing so one of my daughters. However, that being said, your new body does have its own instincts and desires. It knows what it wants and it knows how to get it. I will admit that I do have designs for you but please believe me when I say that I do love you just as any mother would love her daughter.” She said in that French accent of hers as she reached out and stroked my cheek with one of her delicate hands.

“I know that you’re having a hard time trusting right now. That is fully understandable for someone in your situation, but you need to know that I have no intention of doing you any harm.” This was it then. That last bit she said held an unspoken question. Would I be willing to trust her enough to believe her and go with whatever she had in mind for me?

On the one hand, I knew that the woman before me was older than anyone had a right to be and could end me before I could so much as blink. On the other hand, she claimed that she wanted the best for me and actually loved me and cared for my wellbeing. What I really needed was more time to decide, but that was a luxury I just didn’t have.

“Ok Mama, I’ll trust you.” I answered her question. I figured that if all else failed, I could make a run for it or something.

“Thank you, Daughter. But there isn’t anywhere that you can run to in town that I can’t find you, and the curse on us all binds you and any other new daughter of either mine or Wisteria’s to this town for around a decade, so leaving isn’t an option. And yes, I can read your mind, before you ask.” She said with a somewhat amused smirk on her face as my own face dropped in astonishment. Her eyes said that she was pleased with my decision.

Well, with that being said, I guessed there was nothing left for it. It was either adapt of perish, again. As far as I was concerned, that wasn’t an option, so that left me with adapting. Would it be hard? Abso-freakin’-lutely. Just how the hell is a person supposed to come to terms with the fact that they’re dead? ‘Hi Honey, welcome home! I died while you were at the office today, but I brought home that chicken roast like you asked’ or something like that?

Why must I still be Fates little bitch?

Twenty minutes later

Carmilla had suggested that I stop by Suzanne’s place and talk with her about becoming more comfortable with being a woman and a vampire and doing all the things that being both of those entailed. She gave me directions to a place that was about a fifteen minute ride up the road.

After reapplying the sun block, I hopped on the scooter and took off for her place. Upon arrival, I must say that I was impressed with how well maintained the house was. Just looking at the styling of it, it looked like it had been around from the town’s very beginnings, but everything about it looked brand spanking new. I was honestly wondering if I was going to smell that ‘new car smell’ after walking through the front door or something.

I hesitated only for a second before knocking on the door. I really didn’t know what to expect, so I was trying to keep an open mind about what I might see, but I still couldn’t have expected what greeted me when the door opened.

“Well, hello there.” She said, her platinum blonde hair cascading down from a high ponytail to barely kiss the top of her hips. She was wearing a beautiful silk nighty that managed to be decent and cover everything while still remaining erotic and provocative.

“Hi. Carmilla sent me to talk to you.” I told her. I would have been nicer, but my body was being an insistent little shit and doing strange thing again. Just like it did with Frankie at the music shop earlier.

“So she told me. Come on in, darling. I promise I won’t bite unless you’re into that sort of thing.” She said with a small smile on her face that I couldn’t read. That troubled me, as I had spent all that time in psychology studying people and I hadn’t even the foggiest idea what could have been going on behind those beautiful eyes.

I followed her into the front foyer and I must say that I was impressed by the décor. Most of it looked to be antique heirlooms, but knowing that she was a vampire I wouldn’t have been surprised if she had bought them when they were brand new. She led me through the foyer and into an adjacent parlor.

“So, take a seat and tell me about what’s bothering you.” She said as she gestured to what looked like the most comfortable couch in existence. I took her up on that offer and found that, indeed, I couldn’t imagine a more comfortable couch on this side of Heaven.

I told her about the issues I was having with actually being a woman and having to feed from men. I told her about the incident with Frankie at the music shop earlier in the day and how I was having trouble with dealing with the thought of it, even if my body wanted it to no end.

I’m not entirely sure how she did it but by the time I was done talking with her, she had managed to get *me* to slide across the couch and snuggle up with her. She had a hand tracing random patterns across my back and my leg lying across both of hers.

Don’t bother asking me for details. All I’ll say is that she somehow managed to get me out of my clothes and show me a good time, from a woman’s point of view. After that, I wasn’t feeling so skittish about being the one penetrated. And it just so happened that she had a few friends over while I was there for me to try the ‘real deal’ for myself. All I’ll say is that it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.

Three hours, one good time and a hot shower later

“I’m still having a hard time believing that I got roped into doing this.” I groused at Darcy as we made our way back over to the Guardian. At least I talked her into letting me wear the shirt I picked out earlier.

“Believe it, sister. You need to get used to this as quickly as possible. As I’m certain Mother told you, the secret must be kept.” She teased.

“Yeah, yeah. I get that. Seriously, I do. But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to believe it.”

“How does that make any kind of sense?”

“I’m in denial.” I told her with a straight face. All this got me was a roll of her eyes. She and I went back and forth over this almost all the way there. In fact, it didn’t stop until we just happened across Frankie walking to the Guardian with Vick.

“Hey, it’s him.” Darcy said while nudging my shoulder. “I wonder who his friend is...”

“His name is Vick.” I blurted out. This caused Darcy to raise an eye brow at me. “I knew them before my conversion. Suzanne introduced them to me and they were part of the band when I performed at the Guardian before...”

Her eyes grew a little at this revelation.

“Oooohhh... So that’s why you were acting so shy about him.” She said with a giggle that compelled me to take a playful swat at her arm. All this got me was full blown laughter from her.

“How is it that someone so bubbly can be so sadistic?” I asked no one at all.

“Look at this this way: would you rather be with someone that you don’t even know for your first time, or be with someone that you do know so that you can have a fond memory of them, both in life and in death?”

Ya know? I hadn’t given that one very much thought. The parts of me that still stubbornly held on to being Michael, few as they were by this point, could see where she was coming from. As Michael, I was always told that the girl’s most private places were invaded, in a way, every time she had sex and that it didn’t matter if she wanted it or not. That’s what my old man had always told me to treat it like.

Now that I was a woman, with all the urges that included (plus a few with me being a vampire and all), I was starting to think that he just didn’t want me getting some poor young girl knocked up or something. It was seriously a struggle not to just run over to Frankie and.. You get the idea.

We tailed them into the Guardian, per my request. I wasn’t quite sure that I was ready but I was getting really hungry by this point.

“Why are we trying to be so sneaky?” Darcy asked in a loud whisper.

“Because that one on the right is that guy from the music store earlier, that’s why.” I answered in a real whisper. I really didn’t want to know what would have happened if any of my sisters caught wind that I actually made contact with people I knew from before my conversion.

“Oh, I see.” She said with a sly grin. “Good eye, girl. Keep that up and Mother might just have you gathering information and stuff on the people she finds interesting.”

“Yay me?” I said, completely unsure if I should have felt good about that or not. It would be a few years before I realized just how much like a fourteen year old girl trying to stalk a new boyfriend I was being just then, but I was beyond caring. We waited about five minutes then made out way inside ourselves.

She walked in first and grabbed my hand and dragged me off to the little girl’s room.

“What’d ya do that for?” I asked, completely clueless about what was going on. We’ve got to check the makeup, girl.” She answered like everyone was supposed to know that. “Can’t go running around with seared makeup, can we?”

“I’d have to say... No?” I guessed. Seriously, I hadn’t had all that much contact with women before becoming one. How was I supposed to know?

“Someone get the girl her prize, she’s a winner” Darcy said with a smug smile. I was getting good at these guessing games, apparently. After a few minutes re-painting our faces on, we headed back through the bathroom door and up to the bar where Frankie and Vick were seated.

“Hey there fellas, I’m Darcille, and this is my roommate Danielle.” She decided to take the initiative and introduce us to them. “I don’t think either of us caught your name at the shop earlier.”

“I’m Frank, and this my partner in crime, Vick.” He said as they introduced themselves. Darcy wasted no time and put Vick under her Mesmer almost immediately.

“Come on, girl, get with it already. Mesmer the poor boy so we can eat already.”

“Oh...” That I could even do that had completely slipped my mind. I looked into his eyes and I still have a hard time describing how this works. I felt him and his lust for me, which creeped me out a bit by the way, then felt it bending to my will. Interesting... A girl could get to liking this a bit too easily if you ask me. I’d have to be careful about that in the future.

I allowed him to take my hand and we followed Darcy and Vick around the bar and towards the storage rooms in the back. As my luck would have it, I ended up in the same room I was in when I was the guy and Carmilla converted me. Well, it was now or starve. I walked in from of him and laid face up on the cot and looked at him expectantly. He didn’t disappoint.

I’m willing to admit that it wasn’t all that bad at all, after I got over my nervousness of being penetrated. I’ll also say that the boy has the stamina of an Olympian god or something. It was kind of weird drinking from him, but he didn’t taste bad at all, so I was able to deal with it. But that’s all you get to know about that night. A girl has to have her secrets, after all.

Mid-September 2010...

“Dammit Dani, you done in there yet? I’ve been ready to go for a while now!” I hear Darcy calling to me from the other side of the door to my room. I’ve been writing down all that has happened to me over the years so that I won’t forget. I’ve been told many times by Jo and ‘Milla that I will never forget, but I don’t like taking the word of another for something like that. That aside, maybe I could turn it into a fictional story and make some money off of it.

“Yeah, I was waiting on you, bitch.” I shout to her. She and I have been roommates since I was converted and have what would seem like a complicated relationship to someone who didn’t know us. Each throws insults at the other like it’s going out of style, but neither of us are ever serious about any of it.

“Whatever, whore, you know you wish you were even half as hawt as I am.” She said in a thick ‘Valley Girl’ accent as she strutted into the room and struck a pose, then ruined it by breaking out in a giggle fit.

“You wish, slut. Now let’s go get fed, I’m about half starved and horny as hell.” In case you can’t tell, I have no social filter. While it usually embarrasses the ones I’m with to no end, it does lead to some stories that are downright hilarious, at least in retrospect.

“You did not just say that.” She said with an incredulous look on her face. “It’s been how long now and you still talk like a guy?”

“Only because it drives you and the others up the walls.” I explained with my most winning smile. And it was true, too. I never did fully assimilate to being a woman. I hopped up from where I was sitting on my bed and took one last look at myself in the mirror.

After some last minute primping in the mirror, just to annoy Darcy, I walked with her out to the street where my Honda Cub was parked. Normally we would go to the Guardian, but she and I had decided to do things a little differently tonight.

It was the anniversary of the day that Frankie, John, and Cornbread (whose name I would later learn was actually Carroll and that he was named after Carroll Shelby, the creator of the Shelby Cobra) had all left for the west coast to seek their fame and fortunes.

And that left only Vick in town. Instead of moving with the other guys, he stuck around and set up a little karaoke bar on the other side of the campus from the Guardian. He sold it to Joey about two months after opening it because he had some kind of project he wanted to work on. Long story short, he died about five months after starting his project. I’m pleading the fifth on the details of that one.

Anyway, this was where the frat boys did their thing when there weren’t any house parties to crash as The Guardian was more laid back, kind of like a chill spot. I didn’t really have a preference for where I got my food, that is, when I wasn’t out doing this or that for Mama.

While the quality of the ‘food’ wasn’t as good as what one could find in The Guardian, in my opinion, I’ve found that I could actually attain a feeling similar to being drunk from the guys at this bar as they usually had much higher blood alcohol levels.

After catching what seemed like every red light on the way there, I finally parked and we went inside to find us some food. Unsurprisingly, more than a few of the idiot frat boys were in here. There just weren’t very many who looked appealing either to me or to Darcy.

“Hey Darse, I think we came to the wrong bar. I don’t see any good looking guys anywhere.” I said to her while pantomiming the act of scanning the bar. “All I see are these nitwits gawking at us like we’re on the menu.”

“Yeah, I think you’re right Dani.” She replied. “Maybe we should just go back. It’s no fun at a place like this unless you know someone here.”

Then she and I both let out involuntary squawks of indigence as Joey pulled us both onto his lap. While I was expecting him to do something like this, being pulled off balance threw me off my guard.

“Oh really, now? And here I was thinking I was looking at two of the prettiest women in this entire state, but if that’s how you’re going to be...” He let his retort hang for a moment. I decided not to tease him until I had him good and drunk out of his mind later, so I leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“Hey Joey, why don’t you and Dani lead us off with that song you guys have been practicing? I haven’t heard it yet.” Darcy asked.

“Well...” He stalled as he looked at me for the go ahead. It’s a duet, with a male and a female part. I liked it, even if the female part was written for a soprano like Darcy. She just couldn’t get the feel of the song quite right. The band that wrote it did so as a vicious dig at a former member, so naturally it’s an angry song. It didn’t fit very well with the season, but Joey just went through a bad break up and Darcy and I both wanted to make sure he was alright.

After we ran through a few warm up scales, Joey and I took our places at the microphones. I felt eyes on me while I walked and turned to take a look. It wasn’t in the normal way either. Normal, for me, was lust or envy. The gaze I felt on my back was full of malice and hatred. I couldn’t help but smile a bit when I found the source. It was Joey’s ex-girlfriend.

The girl was a knock out, too. As close to a vampire’s good looks as a human could get. She had golden blonde hair that fell down to her shoulders and these piercing blue eyes that seemed to gaze into your very soul. I was sorely tempted to call her out on that and ask her if she could see mine. None of us at Delta Beta had figured out if we still had our souls or not yet, so it was a point of curiosity for me.

“You know that she’s up at the bar right now, right?” I said with a smirk, turning back to Frankie.

“Then let’s make it extra special. May I have this dance?” He asked with a sadistic smile as he held his hand out to me like he was asking me to waltz with him. While the smile was warranted with what that bitch put him through, I couldn’t help but find it out of place on him. He normally had a very soft, kind looking face.

“Why, of course my good sir. I would be honored to dance with you on this pleasant night.” I returned and shot an evil smile of my own towards ‘The Bitch,’ as we had taken to calling her. Just to rub it in, I snapped my teeth at her. I thought she was going to break the mug of whatever-it-was she was nursing with the way she was gripping it after that. I mean, seriously. I thought it something like White Lightning

We all gathered around the machine and queued up the songs that we wanted and debated the order to sing them in for a bit. After ironing everything out, the others went and sat down and waited for the intro for Frankie’s song to start. As much I loved the song, it was going to be a stretch for me to sing it like it was recorded. The high notes were almost out of my vocal range.

“You know she’s going to hate all of us for this, right?” I told him while the intro was getting under way.

“Yeah, but The Bitch deserves it. Let her rot in her misery.”

I was so busy laughing at how angry he was about it that I almost missed my first lines.

“Finally the hills are without eyes. They are tired of painting a dead man's face red with their own blood.” I sang, knowing that his ex had inadvertently taken one of the best seats in the house. “They used to love having so much to lose. Blink your eyes just once and see everything in ruins...”

"Did you ever hear what I told you? Did you ever read what I wrote you? Did you ever listen to what we played? Did you ever let in what the world said? Did we get this far just to feel your hate?” Frankie came in and sang after a brief pause. “Did we play to become only pawns in the game? How blind can you be, don't you see? You chose the long road, but we'll be waiting”

“Bye, bye, Beautiful!” I sang with a voice that was somewhere between a natural singing voice and a heavy metal scream. During this, I slid up in front of him and ground my rear into his crotch. I had a sad mental laugh that I was only just barely tall enough to do that to him. I was delighted when he followed my lead and ran his hands over my hips and down the front of my thighs, only just missing my womanly bits. I then turned to see The Bitch’s reaction and sang to her. “Bye, bye, Beautiful!”

“Jacob's ghost for the girl in white, blindfold for the blind. Dead Siblings walking the dying earth” I continued after the brief pause between the chorus and the second verse. ”Noose around a choking heart. Eternity torn apart, so toll now the funeral bells...”

"No need to die to prove a lie...” Joey sang out, putting as much anguish in his voice as he could muster. “Did you ever hear what I told you? Did you ever read what I wrote you? Did you ever listen to what we played? Did you ever let in what the world said? Did we get this far just to feel your hate? Did we play to become only pawns in the game? How blind can you be, don't you see? You chose the long road, but we'll be waiting.”

“Bye, bye, beautiful!” We both sang in that almost metal scream this time around. ”Bye, bye, Beautiful! Bye, bye, Beautiful! Bye, bye, Beautiful!”

“It’s not the tree that forsakes the flower, But the flower that forsakes the tree.” Joey sang with as much passion as the boy could muster. ”Someday I’ll learn to love these scars, still fresh from the red-hot blade of your words”

“How blind can you be? Don’t you see... How blind can you be? Don’t you see...” I took over with a stage whisper of my own. ”How blind can you be? Don’t you see that the gambler lost all he does not have?”

”Did you ever hear what I told you? Did you ever read what I wrote you? Did you ever listen to what we played? Did you ever let in what the words said?” We sang the final Chorus together. My mezzo-soprano harmonizing quite nicely with his tenor. ”Did we get this far just to feel your hate? Did we play to become only pawns in the game? How blind can you be, don’t you see? You chose the long road but we’ll be waiting...

“Bye bye, Beautiful! Bye bye, Beautiful! Bye bye, Beautiful! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye!”

I took a quick, sideways glance at the bar to check out her reaction and I’ll tell you what. If looks could kill then hers would have staked me a dozen times over from two miles away. Pleased as punch with myself for getting her all riled up like that, I turned away and favored Darcy and the guys with a sheepish grin.

“I think I made her mad, you guys.” I told them, instantly rearranging my face to one of indignance and crossing my arms below my breasts. “We even went through all the trouble of singing a song just for her and she goes and hates us for it. Seriously, the nerve of some people.”

A few days or so later...

Well... there is no way that is going to end well. I thought to myself after watching Theresa and Jolene talking to the same prospective recruit. He was a mousy looking thing. Should prove interesting to watch this play out, though.

We, meaning vampires of Delta Beta (which included my adorable and so very charming self), were only allowed to pick one new sister for this school year. We could have probably gotten away with not getting a new one, but Mother loved having her daughters around. Even if she did scare the newer ones to no end with all of those scary stories of her past that I may or may not have exaggerated slightly. I never could figure out what the big deal was about them anyway. But maybe that was just me being me: from my conversion even up until today, I’ve never once been accused of being a normal anything.

Oh, where am I? The answer is quite simple, really. Up. Theresa, Jolene, and the boy who would probably be in for the surprise of his (soon to be cut short) life later tonight were all on the ground and I had been up in a tree from much earlier in the morning. What was I doing in a tree? I’d love to be honestly able to tell you that I was just watching the people interact, but I would be a liar if I told you that.

You remember that bitchy little thing that I sang for the other day? She turned a few dogs loose on me while I was out on my morning run and then proceeded to chase me around the campus in her car while somehow managing not to run those damnable dogs over like I was trying to trick her into doing. I ended up running up a tree to get away from her and realized that I had been gone too long to be ready for orientation this year, so I had decided to stay put.

Of course, I could have gotten away from her in an instant, what with my vampiric speed and all, but that would have clued her in to the fact that I’m not human anymore. So that was out of the question, and maybe, just maybe, I was a bit too much of a bitch the other night, so I let her chase me up this tree. But the two real reasons I hadn’t gotten down yet was that I was comfortable right where I was, what with the tree’s leafs shading me from the light and everything, and the oh so simple fact that those thrice damned, mange-ridden dogs were still down there trying to bark at the tree till it fell over with me still in it. And being stuck like that was just straight up embarrassing.

If Mama or any of my sisters asked me, I was planning on telling them it was a social experiment. I think I’ll go with: “People Watching... and maybe throwing unripe walnuts from my perch at the stupid ones I don’t like.” The objective is to see how long I can sit here with everyone else oblivious to my existence because of all the leaves in the tree, even if I did end up throwing only a couple (dozen) walnuts. Times like these, I actually kind of like those idiot frat boys. I did leave the weres alone, though. They would have skewed the test results with their heightened senses and everything.

What’s that? Why didn’t I just loose the dogs with my speed after that bitch went somewhere else? That’s a good question, you know that right? The answer is just as good, I promise. And here it is: She never left. She is an art major and was keeping me up here with the fact that she didn’t start classes until tomorrow (do NOT ask me how I managed to learn that one) and she pulled an art easel out of her car, along with a set of drawing pencils and a sketch pad and was drawing the dogs.

And yes, I am fully aware of just how “fine a kettle of fish” I’ve gone and gotten myself into this time. Luckily, I had a huge dinner last night, so I wasn’t feeling anywhere near as hungry as I normally was. Hopefully, one of my sisters comes and gets the bitch to go away. Luckily for me, I didn’t have any classes today either so I wasn’t going to be in too much trouble for this.

Four hours later and I was almost bored to the point of tears. Or insanity, whichever one is furthest along that particular path. I was running low on walnuts that were within reach and I had completely ran out of idiot frat boys. I’d also figured out the hard way that pelting the dogs, who were still trying to bark the tree over (no pun intended), wasn’t the brightest of ideas. Nor would that make them want to go away. So, with no other unexplored options, I did the only thing I could do: I started pelting little Ms. Bitchy McWhorington and that stupid drawing that wasn’t completely about me with the last few walnuts.

Fifteen minutes after that and finally one of the campus rent-a-cops comes walking by and notices her screaming at me from her stool for the bruising that the walnuts caused on her arms and face. About twenty minutes after that, and yes, it took them that long to get the only animal control unit in this tiny little town out here, and I was finally able to get down out of the tree.

Call me a glutton for punishment if you really want, but I managed to weasel the numbers for both the rent-a-cop and the animal control unit just to be mean to the Bitch and blew all three a kiss as I walked off to go home.

“You stupid bitch!” She screeched at my back after that little bit of taunting. “This isn’t over! You hear me!?”

“Mettre un coq dans celui-ci, vous deux bits putain” I called out to her over my shoulder just as sweetly as I could. It was a little something I had picked up from Mama-San when she thought I couldn’t hear her. She’s from France, as obviously indicated from the accent that she most commonly has, so it was natural that I would try to talk her into teaching me the language of love. Or hate, in this case.

Oh, you want to know what that translates to in English? Sure, I’ll tell you. It means: “Look it up in an online translator ‘cause I’m not going to risk getting my mouth washed out with soap... Again.”

And after all of this, I can finally go home and get what I’ve really wanted all damn morning: A HOT, SOOTHING, RELAXING SHOWER!!! Can’t a girl enjoy a relaxing shower after her morning run? Is that too much to ask for? IT IS?! What do you mean, ‘Yes, it is’? Just what the hell is this world coming to, anyway?

*twitch*