Chapter 6

The fact that we considered the story future fact set him back.

“You’re telling me that there are islands out there which will disappear in our lifetime?”

“We are. There are research papers that lay it out, clear as day, should you bother to read them. It’s just that we have been in a place where reading them was our job. It will continue to be our job for a while longer, so the next story will have similar reality. We have a play, opening in Amsterdam, in a few weeks, that covers a typical problem of the rise in water levels.”

“Well, you two are more than just pretty faces.”

“That’s why we’re approaching the end of our degrees. It takes more than a pretty face to pass those. Anyway, what’s the deal for tomorrow?”

“Right. After breakfast there’ll be a car to take you to a salon to make you even more beautiful, then back here for lunch. After that you go and get dressed for the event. That starts at three and I’ll come to your room to escort you down. It’s drinks and nibbles while standing around so you will be able to mingle. I’ll introduce you to the film people but don’t talk negotiations with them. Then we have a break and dinner starts at seven. Whatever you do, please stick together, as there will be some who will want to get you on your own.”

“Are we allowed to ask the film people about their intentions? We would hate to see the book turned into science fiction and having a monster coming out of the sea.”

“That’s all right, it may help you decide what you want to do. Look, here’s a statement as of yesterday. Have a look at it and get cracking on getting that accountant.”

He left us at the table, and we looked at the paper. I could hardly breathe after seeing the numbers. They weren’t big enough to retire on but was a good start in life. Elaine closed her eyes and jabbed at the accountant list, and we rang the one she landed on. When we were put through, she told him who we were and that we needed his services. He asked us where we were at the moment and said he would be with us in a half an hour, depending on traffic.

We took the opportunity to go and freshen up, asking the waitress to hold our alcove for us. I went to reception and asked them to direct a visitor to the alcove when he asked for us. We then sat with soft drinks and some crisps until he arrived, talking about the event tomorrow.

When the accountant arrived, we were surprised that he wasn’t old, bald or overweight. Actually, he was quite a good-looking guy, if a bit older than us. He sat with us, and we explained what we needed in the way of our own company, showing him the figures we had been given.

“What you need is straight-forward and we can get a start on the setting up of the company on-line. It will allow you to employ people in the future. You will probably need a secretary to manage your signing tours and book fair invitations, taking that out of the hands of the publisher. I have a couple of clients that are on his books, and he does have a habit of organising things out of the blue if there’s some money to be made. You will need to have a more finely tuned diary.”

“We don’t intend to do a lot about those sorts of event if we can help it. We have degrees to finish, and we both have employment with the EU in Brussels. The event here, tomorrow afternoon, was sprung on us. We didn’t know it was on until we checked in. We thought we were here to talk about film rights before we started on the signing tour.”

“If I take you on as clients, I will have to know your income from the EU, so we can sort out the tax implications regarding UK and EU taxes. If you’re resident in Brussels, your earnings here may have to be treated differently than if you were resident here. If you have an address in both countries, it all changes. Can you fill out these forms and courier them to my office, so we can get the ball rolling, please. I have to say that I read the book and will be proud to work on your behalf.”

He left us the forms and a couple of his business cards. He also had the book which he wanted us to sign for his wife. When he had gone, we took the papers up to our room to look at later. Now, it was time for an afternoon nap, the day had been one surprise after another. We didn’t sleep, however, but made better use of the bed, having slept apart at my old home.

We were sitting at the vanity, doing our make-up, when Ellie looked suddenly serious.

“Mad. There’s one thing we didn’t tell the accountant, and that’s who you really are.”

“That’s the question I’m asking myself. Here I am, sitting in front of a mirror and doing eye liner. Am I Clarence or am I becoming Pattie. Belinda said I was more outgoing and happier as Patricia. Since we’ve changed me externally, I wonder if I’ve also been changed internally.”

“You are much more pleasant with others, and you do interact like any normal girl, so we just have to see where it goes. This afternoon, you proved that you’re still essentially my Clarrie, no matter what you look like. I think it’s a bit sensual when we kiss, lipstick to lipstick. My best friend in high school would always kiss me like that. I think that she was a bit gay, but I resisted her suggestions for a pyjama party. I’m thinking about putting her in a book as a character. With my name on the cover, she’ll know who she is.”

“Whatever we do, others are going to have to be let into the inner circle. How about us ringing that accountant again. He would still be in his office. We have time to go and see him with our passports as proof of who I am. He may not take us on after that. When he said that we would need a secretary, that’s another who will have to know the truth.”

“You’re sounding as if you intend to be Patricia Shelley full-time?”

“Doesn’t it feel that it will be necessary? There will be photos on the book covers, posters at the signings. I can’t go back if we want to have a writing future. We could always stop, right now, and disappear from the public as a one-hit-wonder.”

“Not that! I love writing, and I love writing with you. No! EFT/POS is what we put on our papers for the EU, and that is what we need to do. You’re always thinking about the next book, and I don’t think that going back to bodice-busters as Clare Higgins is what you’ll be happy with.”

We rang the accountant and arranged to see him. We finished dressing, picked up the papers and our own papers, putting it all in a shoulder bag, going down to the reception and getting the doorman to call us a taxi. At the accountant’s office, we were shown into his office.

“Thank you for seeing us again, so quickly. There are a few things that we need to discuss with you before we fill out your papers.”

“That’s all right, I’m glad that you’re thinking seriously. You’re not going to tell me that someone else wrote your story, I hope.”

“Well, there is another personality involved. You see, I started writing in high school, with romantic novels under the name of Clare Higgins.”

“My wife has read all of your books. She said that they were more real than the other in that genre. What difference does that make to now?”

“The name was chosen because the genre had mainly women writers. My name, at the time, was Clarence Higgins. Here is my UK passport.”

He looked at the passport, studied the picture, and smiled.

“It is a very close likeness. If you have this passport, how did you come back from Europe looking like that?”

I passed over my EU diplomatic passport, which he looked at and then sat back in his chair.

“Well, I never expected that. Do you have one of these as well, Elaine?”

She passed him both of her passports.

“Are you spies, or something?”

“We’re speech writers for the President of the Commission. We were with her when she travelled around the world a few months ago. We wrote the speech she gave in early December, as well as the original report that led to that speech. Clarence becoming Patricia was for the publisher and this tour. What we didn’t realise that he expected us to recruit another girl to be on show, and we created another girl from what we had. Is that going to be a problem?”

He chuckled, then turned a picture of a girl towards us.

“This is my son. He didn’t feel right in his body. When he came out to us, we weren’t happy, but promised him that we would look up the details. When we saw how many like him have suicided, we embraced his longings and welcomed a new daughter. She would love to be sitting here with you, as Clare Higgins was one of her favourites before taking up your later stories. She’ll be with me when we come along to the signing. How did your parents take the new you?”

“Mum was happy about it, as she knew what it was for. My father wouldn’t have approved, but my stepfather is OK. My sister likes me more than when I was a boy, and my brother is now living with his boyfriend, so I guess he’ll be good with it.”

“Look, this just adds a level of complexity, with us needing to work with your actual records. I guess that you haven’t done a name change and that your previous earnings went into your original bank account. Does the EU pay you as Clarence?”

“They do. The passport is a prop, to allow me to travel. I guess that somewhere in the system, there is a Patricia Shelley, but don’t know what details they put alongside her.”

“All right. Fill in the paperwork as Clarence, with your details, and we’ll get to working on creating your account. You will have all the government numbers against your file, so setting it up will look normal. There are no complications with your details, Elaine?”

“Not until I become Elaine Higgins, no.”

We filled out the paperwork in front of him, and he called in his secretary to see us sign. She had to be brought into the circle, as she would do most of the typing and filing of our account. We were assured that she would keep the secret, along with the secrets of other clients, as there were other writers on his books who wrote using more than one pseudonym.

We were taken back to the hotel in a calmer frame of mind. We may have elevated our subterfuge into a higher plane, but it had cleared the way forward. We had a quiet dinner in the hotel and retired early. It had been a big day.

The next morning, we dressed casually and didn’t bother with much make-up. After breakfast, a car arrived to take us to the salon. This was another situation that needed careful handling. I was shaving my arms and legs regularly, and usually shaved my face-fuzz, but today left the face alone. At the salon, I told the girl that I was getting a bit of a fuzz and needed it waxed. They did our hair, our face, and our nails, treating us both the same and asking us about writing the book. The whole salon staff had copies to be signed, and we lined up with them for a photo.

Back at the hotel, we had a light lunch and then went up to our room to get glamorous. After we had dressed and retouched our lips, we waited for the knock on the door that would be the beginning of our official launch as a writing couple.

When it came, we opened up to find our publisher in a good suit, with a woman by his side, who he introduced as his wife. The four of us went down to a function room, where we walked in to find a lot of people waiting for us. They applauded as we walked in, and then the afternoon seemed to dissolve into introductions, selfies, discussion on plots, nibbles, drinks, more selfies and small talk.

We stayed clear of questions about our early days, just saying that we grew up as normal children who loved books and writing. I had conversations with a few of the writers I had loved, discussing their story, rather than ours. We met the film guys, asking them what they had planned with our story. The original man put us off, immediately, when he admitted that he wanted the rights so that he could hawk them around to the studios. The other two were from established studios, one British, and the other American. We told the publisher to talk to those, but that any decision would be based on their plans for the story. He said that there would be two meetings, in the morning, and went off to arrange them.

The only awkward moment was when a theatre critic linked Elaine with the play that had been put on in Colchester, as well as other regional towns.

“That play of yours was co-written by Clarence Higgins. Do you still see him?”

“I do. We are both doing our university degree. We wrote a play for the drama class at Antwerp this year, which is going to be performed by a good cast in Amsterdam soon. It’s called ‘Don’t Water the Tulips’. The director came to the University performance and liked it.”

Eventually, the room was cleared, and we could relax. We went up to our room to have a shower and redress for dinner. The dresses were the same, but the make-up took a lot longer. When we went down to where the dinner was, we were surprised to see a table laden with hardback copies of our book, the dust cover with pictures of us on the back. The publisher was there sorting things out and saw our interest.

“The initial print run was all soft cover, but with success comes collectors. They will pay much more for a good hard cover edition, especially one dated the same as the first edition. You’ll find that when you are on tour, all the shops will have piles of these, and most of those who came will have bought one, even if they had turned up with a soft cover one in their bag.”

The dinner was interesting, with each guest given a new book. We hosted a few politicians, some actors and singers, some ‘influencers’, and a few literary critics. Most of them were so self-centred, they didn’t give a hoot who we were, and I doubted that most of the books would ever be opened after tonight. We signed them all, some wanted a personal message. It was interesting to listen to the talk around the table, but we didn’t have to put too much in, and we were able to say goodnight to our guests, with me being hugged and kissed by several men. We made a cup of tea in our room and sat in our nighties to drink it.

“That was a very interesting evening. We have more characters in our minds to add to stories, whenever we need narcissists. The singer with the top ten hit was great fodder, dropping all the names of other singers he knew.”

“The influencer who wanted us to endorse her on our website was great. She couldn’t believe that we don’t have one for ourselves. All she could talk about was the free meals that she got in return for an endorsement.”

“I loved the politician who wondered if removing the sales tax on books would improve the reading rate. You can read most things on-line for next to nothing. All it would do is lower the tax income.”

The next morning, we dressed casually and went down for breakfast. As we were finishing, our publisher came in.

“Great job last night, girls. You gave them enough to show that you cared. We have the first meeting in half an hour in the function room where we had the meet and greet, with the second a half an hour after. I’ve heard what they have to say but I’ll leave it up to you to make the decision. Then you get today and tomorrow to rest, before a car will pick you up to go to the first event.”

He went and got himself a coffee while we finished. We went back to the room to freshen up and then went to the function room, where we found a table with chairs either side, and a bench with hot water and the makings. We were sitting comfortably when he brought the first guy in. It was the guy representing a very well-known American studio. He opened up with an offer for the rights that sounded like a telephone number, and I saw the publisher smile. I let Ellie ask the question we wanted answered. We had talked it over and knew what we needed.

“Can you tell us what your studio plans to do with the story? Will you be following it, as is?”

“No ma-am, there’s no way our audiences would swallow that end-of-the-world ending. We plan to adapt it as more of a surfing story, with the girl trying to get recognition for beach bunnies, with the last scene showing her and the hero on their boards, surfing the last wave.”

“I’m sorry, sir. We will discuss the offer after we’ve seen the other studio representative, but I can tell you that it’s unlikely that you will be successful. Good morning to you.”

I gave her arm a pat as he stood, red-faced. The publisher looked shocked. When the man had left, he turned to us.

“You know that the other studio won’t come close to that offer! I’m sure we could have pushed him higher.”

“The money is not the deciding factor. The book is about the end of a lifestyle, the relocation of an entire population, and the wiping of their home off the face of the earth. We told you, before. The story is real, it’s not a question of if, it’s only a question of when. We will not have our name connected with the bit of fluff that he just gave us.”

We had a drink while he left us to wait for the next man.

“You did well, there, Ellie.”

“It was a no-brainer, Mad. I couldn’t see our serious bit of work end up like a cheap Annette Funicello movie that they used to show on Saturday mornings. I know that you would be happier to just say no, rather than sell the rights.”

We were finishing our drink when the other man was shown in, or should I say man and woman. When the small talk was over, she was the one to open the negotiations.

“Look, I know that the Americans would have thrown a lot of money your way but hear me out. We don’t have the cash they do, but we have more integrity than them. I’ve read your book, twice, and talked to some people. You have written something that’s not only plausible, but I’m told it’s entirely possible, or even inevitable. We will make the film to the book, and there is enough footage of the Japanese tsunami to give the reality to the final scene as the waves approach the shore.”

“No changes to the basic story?”

“No. We may cut some of the dialogue in the middle with the populace, leaving enough to show the process, but the scenes between the two main characters will remain complete. It’s a hell of a love story.”

“So, what are you offering for the rights, if we keep control of the content, seeing that you aren’t messing around with the basic story?”

She named a figure at about half of the one the other guy had offered. Then she smiled.

“We’ll sweeten the deal with a half a percent of the gross. That costs us very little if the film is a box-office hit but will take your payment well past whatever the Americans offered, up front.”

“Madam, your offer is accepted. We expect to see paperwork from your office when you can get it organised. The payment will be made to a company our accountant is setting up for us, which should be in place in a couple of weeks.”

“That will be good. All we need is to find a location.”

“The island described in the book is in French Polynesia. We were there early in the year. If you want, we can introduce you to people who can get you access to it, as long as you agree to a French-speaking version as well, not just sub-titles.”

She started laughing.

“I’m going to love working with you two. We can arrange a meeting in a couple of months, after your tour. Do you have anything else we might be interested in?”

“There will be a play in Amsterdam towards the end of summer you may want to look at. It’s called ‘Don’t Water the Tulips’. It’s another love story with the girl fighting the local council to get them to raise the dykes before the tulip fields get flooded.”

We girls hugged, and the men shook hands. When we were alone, the publisher gave us both a hug.

“I thought you were crazy not taking the American offer, but a percentage on the film takings could be very good for you. The book will get a second life when the film comes out. Enjoy the short break, you deserve it.”

We went up to our room and freshened up, then went out for a walk. It was good to just be in the open air, with nobody on our backs for speeches or assignments. We had got through the third year of our degree, had managed to get the fourth year transferred to Antwerp, had good jobs, a book in the best-seller lists, and now had a film that would be made. Knowing the little we did know, that would be filmed over the next six months and likely in the theatres as we got towards our finals.

‘It was interesting to see those hard cover books. Should we get some to send to our families and friends?”

“We can ask the publisher for some when we see him. It would be good to send some to the Commission, with appropriate dedications.”

We took it very quietly until the morning of the first signing came around. We dressed well and was careful when we made-up. The crowd was waiting for us when we arrived, and applauded as we went to the table, which had an array of sharpie pens, so we didn’t have to press too hard. The queue had already formed, and the signing started as soon as the manager introduced us. It was a whole new world, with ninety percent of the books put under our noses being the hard cover. Most wanted both signatures, inside the book, but a few only wanted one of us, with those asking us to sign on the back cover photo.

There was a lot of talk and questions, which we answered as briefly as we could without being impolite. We were well served with drinks, had short breaks, given a lunch, and generally treated like a couple of stars. Just before the signing was due to finish, a book was put in front of me, and a voice asked me if I could sign it to Joseph. It was a voice I knew.

“Do I put, with love from Adrian?”

“How do you know my name?”

I pointed to the two names on the back of the dust cover.

“What do these spell out?”

I could see the wheels turning as he worked out what the initials spelt.

“Hang around for when we finish, and don’t say anything to anybody. We’ll take you both to dinner after we finish here.”

I passed the book to Ellie to sign, and I could see the recognition on his face when he saw her. He went to join another lad and they waited until the store manager called time on the session, telling the unfortunate ones to come back tomorrow afternoon, as we would be coming back to make everyone happy.

When we were free to talk, I asked Adrian if there was a good restaurant nearby. I told our driver to come back to pick us up from there at around eight. Then the four of us walked to the restaurant. We kept the obvious questions at bay until we were seated at the table. Then, we told Adrian why I was the POS in the team, and how I came to be sitting there in a dress.

He was amazed at how good I looked and admitted that he had been jealous of me when we were younger. Joseph told us that Adriana wasn’t a patch on her sister. It was a lovely meal and I warmed to the new Adrian, with him now far more easy-going. Joseph was a really nice guy and I wished them both well after I had paid the account. Adrian gave us both a hug and told me that he was proud of how well I was doing. I think that he was happy that I had accepted him and his boyfriend so easily. In the car back to the hotel, Ellie said that she was very glad the two of us had got back together.

Marianne Gregory © 2024