Blonde Joke Chapter Fifteen by Jeffrey M. Mahr   And, of course, the ultimate blonde joke is, “What’s black and blue and brunette?” A brunette that’s told one too many blonde jokes.

The party was in full swing at the Cravat. The club had been closed for this private party, although Kat, Maggie and her friends continued to dance sensuously on stage along with a couple of new girls. Finally, the set ended and Kat, a sheen of sweat covering her body and a huge grin on her face, strode over to a podium set up to one side of the stage while the other girls scampered over to the sole table in the room, located immediately in front of the stage, and giggled as they briefly played musical chairs with the laps of the men sitting there. The one woman already at the table laughed at their playful game and cheered them on. Finally, everyone was settled and Kat cleared her throat, moved the microphone close to her face and in her best, high pitched, breathy, bubbly, bimbo voice said, “Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, a dumb blonde and a smart blonde are walking down the street. They all see a hundred dollar bill on the sidewalk. Which one picks up the money?”

Various suggestions came from the table, some were anatomically difficult to perform and a few were down right impossible. Kat laughed and held up a hand for quiet before answering. “The answer is supposed to be the ‘dumb blonde’ because the other three, Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the smart blonde are figments of the imagination.”

Kat suddenly became serious and her tone of voice changed to follow suit. “I stand here tonight and proudly say that we in this room are the proof that this is no longer correct. Harri, Ricki, please stand up for a moment.”

After some gentle wiggling to keep the man each was sitting on interested, they both stood up and giggled as they waited for Kat to continue. “Harry Walton, now Harri Walton, is now finishing off her doctoral dissertation in Microbiology. Harri, do you feel like a dumb blonde?”

“No Kat,” she answered with a breathy giggle and sat back down on Jack Webster’s lap.

“Dick Baldwin, now Ricki Baldwin, is also finishing a doctorate, but in Management. Same question.”

“Not at all Kat, but sometimes its fun to let people underestimate me,” she answered with a grin and returned to her warm seat on top of Archibald Goddard’s lap.

“Before I continue, I’d like to thank the man without whom this little shindig could never have come to be, the man who single handedly ended all the lawsuits related to ViTaGeSeM and the man wearing the most beautiful emerald green gown this evening. Let’s all give a warm round of applause for Franklin, now Jacqueline Brodsky.”

The woman in question blushed almost as bright a red as her hair, but gave Kat a double thumbs up and a wink as she sat there.

“It’s been one glorious year and I’ll bet my twin would like to bore us with a few hours of financial reports…”

“Not as long as Petey here is keeping my behind so wonderfully warm, I’m not,” Tommi yelled back while giving her bottom a little extra wiggle on Chang Wu’s lap.

“Good. Then you all know the real reason why we’re here, to celebrate the wedding of Franklin Brodsky, now Jacqueline Brodsky, and Sandra Smalling, now Franklin Brodsky. Do either of you love birds have anything to say?”

Jacqueline just shook her head and looked lovingly up at her man. Franklin gave his new wife a kiss that raised another chorus of cheers and then stood. “I’ve dreamed of this day for more than fifteen years and I intend to do everything I can to make this woman,” he stopped to lovingly caress her head and shoulder, “as happy as I possibly can.”

This brought yet another round of applause and Franklin began to sit, but then stood back up again and called for silence. “Of course,” he said with a wry smile, “I expected to be the one wearing white wedding dress, not a white tuxedo.”

Jacqueline slapped playfully at Franklin while the others cheered. And now, before the main event, one last announcement. As you all know, the new BioGenTec has gone public with an initial offering of 1.2 billion dollars. As the Board of Directors, I’m sure you will all be happy to hear that the offering sold out within the first hour and the stock, after opening at two dollars, closed at two hundred eighty seven.”

With that, Jacqueline and Franklin stood. Hand in hand they walked off into the middle of the now empty main room of the club while the lights slowly dimmed to black. In the darkness, Kat spoke out one last time. “Oh, and Maggie? Even in the darkness I can feel you glaring at me still and I again apologize for not telling you about the scam Tommi and I worked up. Please believe me when I swear to you in front of all these people that it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done and that it will never, ever happen again.”

At that point, a single spotlight faded in, showing a beautiful redheaded woman sitting at a small round table. Music began to well up. It was a waltz. A tall handsome man strode confidently into the light and held out a hand, inviting Jacqueline to dance. With a sigh of absolute contentment Jacqueline gracefully flowed into the man’s arms, Franklin Brodsky’s arms. The spotlight followed them as they danced and danced to the growing applause of those in the darkness around them.

Kat couldn't resist. It was such a picture perfect ending, she gave Maggie a hug and Maggie returned the hug with tears in her eyes. Then, still holding Kat, she slapped her.

Shocked, Kat turned to Maggie, who seemed to be blurring and moving away, yet somehow still holding Kat. Kat shook her head to clear the cobwebs from the champagne and realized that she was lying on her back rather than standing. Then, she realized that she was being held spread-eagled on a bed in a room she did not recognize. Again, trying to focus on Maggie's face, she realized that it was actually Tommi's face.

"What the hell is going on here? Let me up," Katrina demanded indignantly.

Tommi just smiled like a Cheshire Cat as another voice answered her.

"Did you have a nice nap, Dr. Isseksen?" Franklin Brodsky asked.

Sputtering in anger, Kat started to reiterate her demand to be released, but Brodsky just spoke over her. "I hope you enjoy the accommodations. You'll be here for a while, until Tommi here has been able to impersonate you well enough to successfully undermine your legal position. Then, we'll decide what to do with you and your sister more permanently. You're welcome to scream all you wish. Such behavior is common from my 'playmates,' so the staff will not be surprised or concerned, and besides they are much too loyal to their paychecks to release you without my personal authorization.

With that, Brodsky turned to leave followed by Tommi. At the door, he turned and said, "Oh, and don't worry about your younger sister. She's back home being the good little girl she needs to be to keep you safe. Next time, don't try to compete with your betters."