As a card carrying member of the ACLU, I regularly get communications from them. Yes, many of those are asking for money to support their programs, but many others are asking for me to sign a petition or to reach out to my Congressman or Senator. They also send out communications regularly to help keep members informed.
I received this one today………
https://www.aclu.org/news/lgbtq-rights/trumps-executive-orde...
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE READ THIS!
And help support an organization which is working to save our rights - to save our very existence.
Comments
Advocacy gone to far
What I have to say should not be taken as a “I told you so”, though to some it might sound like that. So please, everybody, please let us all keep the exchange about this issue civil.
In my personal opinion, we from the trans community are partially to blame for this backlash against our hard fought rights and recognition. Why would I state such an opinion? I am glad you asked.
In the last about 100 years the LGBT community has firstly fought to decriminalize all sexual orientations that do not conform to the traditional heterosexual norm. This has generally affected M-M homosexual orientations more than F-F homosexual orientations. Mainly because in the so-called western societies men were [generally] seen as being superior to women and children, while women were [generally] seen as inferior to men but superior to children. Though sometimes boys who had gone through puberty were ranked higher than women while still below men. And since women were [always] seen as more emotional and more touchy-feely, it has usually been much easier to disguise and hide a F-F homosexual relationship.
Even as recently as the start of this millennium, I have encountered the fact two men living together in one house would get them both accused of and ostracized for being homosexuals, with the implication that all homosexuals (also known as Gays or “Schwule”) are known by definition to be pedophile sexual predators. (Even I as a single father, after my now ex-wife abandoned me with my daughters, have had such accusations hurled into my face.) While at the same time nobody batted even an eyelid at two women sharing a household or accommodations over the long term. And I know several cases where I have long had my personal suspicions of there being more than just sharing a household. But in those instances it was a case of “Don't ask, don't tell”.
In the early 1960s, as sexual orientation was slowly de-criminalized, the struggle for the recognition of gender identity started to emerge. As well as the long battle to get gender identity de-stigmatized as NOT being a mental illness that could be treated by any number of weird and wacky therapies such as electro-shock or aversion therapy. And we have to thank a lot of brave trans advocates (the vast majority of whom have been M2F) for the progress that was achieved over the decades. Lynn Conway was one of the quiet ones, but she has documented and high-lighted many of the active advocates on her website.
In the early years most of the visible trans people had to resort to sex work in some form to survive and finance their transition. Unfortunately that applies almost exclusively to the male-to-female segment. It was only in the mid-to-late 1980s that a shift away from sex work as a mode of survival started to happen. Nowadays it seems that the proportion of sex workers among the trans population seems to be equal to the proportion among the cis population.
Due to the value bias of gender still inherent in our so-called western culture, a transition from female to male is generally considered a social upgrade, while a transition from male to female is definitely seen by the society at large as a significant downgrade. Couple that with the admiration for tomboys and much wider range of socially acceptable clothing choices, and you can appreciate that F2M people have a much easier time at being socially accepted productive members of society. Thus the M2F segment is much more visible and controversial, having to fight a much steeper up-hill battle for social recognition.
After having set the stage with all that historical and sociological and/or anthropological information, I am now coming to the reasoning for my initially expressed opinion.
Instead of being content with [grudging] acceptance by society of an alternative gender identity, and very slowly consolidating the gains made over the preceding decades, a very few but very vocal tried to smash through the social barriers and glass ceiling by demanding access to things they felt entitled to. In the last few years such entitled individuals have become known as “Karen” and social media has been overrun with stories and videos of these entitled and extremely obnoxious individuals. It seems that the vast majority of these Karens are cis-female.
I will give only two examples of trans advocates that, in my personal opinion, went to far to fast: Renée Richards and Caitlyn Jenner. The former imposed herself into women's professional sports through a controversial court battle way back in 1976/1977 after being outed on TV by the father of Tucker Carlson. Around 2012 Renée Richards has expressed ambivalence and maybe even some regret for this legacy she has. The latter has become extremely controversial in the LGBTQ+ community for her views on trans issues. Though Caitlyn Jenner waited until her youngest child was almost 18 years old before publicly transitioning, he had spent the previous 40 years in an ever growing celebrity bubble that started with participation in the 1972 Munich Olympic Games and a Gold medal in the 1976 Montreal Olympic Games, culminating with the reality series “Keeping Up with the Kardashians”. In April 2021 Katelyn Burns of Vox wrote:
As an avid student of transsexual and transgender issues since I gained access to the Internet in early 1998, I have found it chilling and troubling how Jenner's highly publicized and extremely vocal transition, and the increasing backlash against the trans community (starting with bathrooms and sports) seem to coincide.
I have a hard time understanding why cis-males feel so terribly threatened in their own gender identity and sexual orientation by trans-females. But I fully understand why cis-females might feel threatened trans-females, since way to many have experienced sexually motivate physical and/or emotional violence from people with a penis. And even though many of us in the trans community — especially among the male-to-female population — have also been victims of sexually motivated violence, and in serious need of a safe space. We should therefor grant an even higher respect to safe spaces for females and not seek to invade them like a bull in a china shop. If we as trans people show respect for all female safe spaces, we will get invited to some of those spaces and also be granted a safe haven there.
As for competitive sports, my personal opinion is that we should for now steer clear of and stay away from any and all competitive activities segregated by sex. If you are so inclined, then by all means indulge in your athletic activities. But you might want to consider just competing against yourself, or voluntarily refusing to have your achievements recorded or considered for “official” recognition. Maybe becoming a trainer or coach could be a worthwhile outlet for your competitive nature. Again, respect currently established norms and quietly build respect and acceptance from the grassroots without outright vocal demands.
Slow and steady is the way to go for the best long term results. As is so aptly illustrated by this old proverb:
First, let me say that I support your right to your opinion……
But let me also say that I cannot agree with all of it. Having said that, I do agree with part of what you have said. I do agree regarding your opinions on sport - although with the following caveat: transgender girls who transition at an early age have no discernible advantage over many cisgender girls. If a genetically male child is placed on puberty blockers prior to going through a male puberty, then that child may actually be at a disadvantage when compared to others. It is a well known fact that girls tend to mature earlier than boys, and that at some ages girls are easily physically equal to (and often superior to) boys of the same age. This is obviously not true once a transgender girl has gone through some amount of male puberty.
However, any doctor will tell you that until puberty girls and boys are extremely similar in physical capabilities. This obviously changes with puberty.
Admittedly I am taller than my spouse, my shoulders are more broad (but not by a huge amount), my hands are larger (but again, not by a huge amount), and I may have some physical advantages over her because of it. But I can tell you that years after transitioning, there is really no discernible difference in strength between us, as has become quite evident to her when we are playing around. Honestly, she is probably the more aggressive of the two of us normally as well - a fact which she finds quite humorous considering my military background and record.
The other major point which I differ with you in is in regard to the so-called “safe spaces” and showing respect for them. Are you suggesting that I, as a very obvious female, should use the men’s restroom? That I should allow women their “safe space” while placing myself in harm’s way by entering the men’s restroom? After more than a decade since I first transitioned, just how am I less entitled to the use of your so-called “safe spaces”?
I do in fact agree that some of our community have pushed too far, too fast, which may have contributed to the current backlash. However, I think the more realistic view is that they have simply made us more visible, and as a very small minority we are an easy target for people like Trump and his ilk to use. We make an easy target for them to use to whip up support amongst the ignorant and prejudiced morons who are their political base. It is an old story that goes back further than written history, but the most obvious example being the abuse of Jews throughout history as an obvious scapegoat. Additionally, there is an obvious irrational fear of transgender women in some men - and that is especially evident in specific sections of society. It is an old story for those seeking power to play on those fears for their benefit.
I also feel that your correlation between Jenner’s very public transition and the increase in backlash against the transgender community is a well made point. As you have pointed out, Jenner has been a contentious person for the rest of us in the transgender community due to our desire to support another transgender person, while at the same time being revolted at her idiotic political statements. Jenner has done none of us any favors by becoming the face that many think of when transgender people are discussed. I am sure that most of us could think of someone we would prefer to be the example people think of.
But the question here is simple? Is that correlation simply due to the transgender community suddenly becoming more public? If that is the case, shouldn’t we also be placing some blame on things like Ru Paul’s Drag Race? A show which I personally cannot stand as it pushes the whole idea that transgender women are no different than drag queens to much of the population. I am not a drag queen and resent that idea. I find it insulting when people assume that I must love that show. Why? Because I am transgender I must love a show about overly campy drag queens? That is insulting.
Is that how people see us? Is that how we want to be seen? I think not.
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
Many good points
I agree with much of what you say. Mostly I think that as a minority we have made many mistakes. One of the biggest is we've contended ourselves with riding the coattails of the Gay Rights movement, thinking that if we ally ourselves with them, we will be part of a larger minority and be more likely to be heard. I'll point out that in the acronym, LGBT that T is the last letter; kind of like an after thought.
When negotiating for rights, the leaders have always come from the other three letters while we Ts have sat back and let them do all the work. As a result when it became necessary make concessions to make progress, the afterthought, the Ts were thrown under the bus.
We watched this time after time and done nothing.
Mind you, I understand the mindset. My goal as a trans-women is to blend in with women at every turn. To do something would require me to step, no to jump, out of my comfort zone and suffer the slings and arrows of being outed to one and all. And that is the conundrum we find ourselves in.
What doesn't belong?
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
Sitting on the fence.
OK, so I am going to live up to all those clichés about women being conciliators. I actually agree with the main points which all of you have said.
I think that the "overt" trans activists have not helped the vast majority of those of us who just want to get on with our own lives quietly without people spitting at us in the streets. Frankly, I worry that some "trans" sportspeople were motivated by exactly the physical advantages that they may have had from experiencing male puberty. Dallas is totally correct to say that if you haven't undergone male puberty, you don't have those advantages. Let's be honest, though. How many trans "athletes" didn't go through male puberty? The result is that a huge swathe of the cis female community, stoked by the right wing media, feel that trans women are "beating" them "unfairly".
Frankly I don't give a damn who cycles faster, or runs a race or throws a spear. I just want to be able to use the ladies public toilet should I need to. Since my surgery, there's no damn way I am going to the "other place".
Caitlyn Jenner made us all look stupid. Let's face it, anyone in the media circus looks stupid, but Caitlyn, she took it to a new level., and claimed to typify the rest of us. So we all are tarred with a brush of being media seeking airheads. Thanks love.
There is also an issue that activists here, in Scotland, introduced a "self declaration" scheme. That was far from helpful, as lots of "males" declared themselves female "for a laugh". Those of us who went through intensive psychiatric assessments to get our "certificate" were suddenly lumped with a bunch of media attention seekers. The same is true about women's safe spaces. No Dallas, I'm not talking about toilets, but refuges for women raped and beaten, who might not appreciate sharing their space with someone still holding on to the kit that could rape them.
The only way that we as trans women are ever going to win this battle is to be accepted as women by the rest of the population.
Speaking for myself, I was fortunate in that male puberty passed me by, so I "pass" easily. But it's really nothing to do with big arms, or square jaws. People see me as a woman, because that is what I am. I cry at emotional scenes, I don't argue in public. If I am cut up whilst driving, I smile politely and think "pillock".
My mother in law loves the fact that I sit and talk with her about her interests, something that her two daughters never do. My niece loves the fact that I buy sweet clothes for her toddler's birthday.
What Trump has declared is vile, evil and unfair. It is also flawed to its core. We won't beat it by rioting, but by winning friends and influencing people.
Lucy xx
"Lately it occurs to me..
what a long strange trip its been."