Sam hid from the world for most of his life but a chance encounter burst everything open. Now Tracy has promised to reveal the truth.

Sam’s heart pounded as he avoided Tracy’s stare. “You said we’d talk.”

Tracy turned the door handle to her room. “You and I … we ARE going to talk.”

Sam lingered outside the door, a fear-filled dread filling his mind. “You owe me answers. Crystal told me everything... ”

“Everything?” Tracy turned on a heel, her interest piqued. “What did she tell you?”

Sam whispered his response, the idea so ludicrous on its face. “She said you’re turning me into a girl.”

“Of course she did.” Tracy shook her head, a teasing smile on her lips. “Crystal doesn’t have the cleverest of minds and still … I’m surprised you aren’t sprinting through my door.”

Sam tried to make sense of things. “What are you trying to say?”

Tracy pointed Sam towards the bed and pulled out a data pad. “Sit down and roll up your sleeves. I need to evaluate the damage.”

Sam’s feet moved forward without instruction, he tripped and fell into the bed as he tried to sit. Tracy flashed another smile but Sam didn't notice. A tantalizing smell somewhere in the room called to him. “So, is it true?”

“No, Sam. It is not true. I am not turning you into a girl.” Tracy sighed, “How much have you had to drink tonight?”

“Three or four beers…” Sam shrugged, “… or more.”

“Camitas brand?” Tracy wrapped a velcro cuff around Sam’s bicep, and pulled it tight.

“Yeah.” Sam nodded. “What is that thing?”

Tracy attached a cord to the cuff and the cord to a data pad. The device beeped a few seconds later. She looked at the device and then at

Sam’s worried eyes. “Not much harm. The 0.12 blood alcohol will be a problem. Get ready to run.”

Sam hadn’t registered Tracy’s words before the acid taste of bile crept up his throat. “Oh god.” He made a mad dash to the bathroom, finding the toilet in the nick of time. The harsh smell of alcohol wafted from the bowl below.

Tracy stood in the doorway. “Get up.”

“What did you do to me?”

“I purged the beer from your system.”

“You what? How did you do that?”

Tracy handed Sam a cup of coffee and pointed to a chair. “Sit.”

“No.” Sam said, “You owe me answers.”

“I’ll answer your questions as soon as your mind has a chance to clear.” Tracy took a deep breath. “Your body wasn’t the only thing Crystal screwed with tonight.”

Sam smiled as he thought of Crystal. It had been a long time since he’d had sex. He took a long sip of coffee, remembering the encounter. After a second sip, questions began to form. “Why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like our conversation?”

“Because you won’t.” She pointed to the pot of coffee. “More caffeine. We need your brain awake and there’s a lot to cover. It’s going to be a long night.”

“Come on, Tracy.” Sam ripped open his shirt, popping open a few buttons in the process. “You’re trying to tell me you have nothing to do with this?” A look down showed his nipples had distended even more.

“I am not the one changing your body, Sam.”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s not a lie, Sam.” Tracy sighed. “I knew you were hiding things when we first met but no one shows the world their true face.”

“What does that mean?” Sam got an itchy feeling on his skin, like he did at the start of a panic attack.

“Meeting you was either destiny or dumb luck but I’ve been around long enough to not question such things.” Tracy took a deep breath. "When I saw you, I saw someone I knew I could help. I’d had a bad day and you looked like an easy win. I figured … what the hell. My rider quit so I had an extra bike and plenty of Maxus gear.”

Sam thought about the Maxus sports bra in the box she gave him. “Were you training a girl?”

“Yeah.” Tracy nodded. “Her name is Sydney. She’s from Boston, like me. The Chicago branch has an open position and our CEO tasked each branch to find the best candidate. A week ago, the competition had entrants from Boston, Atlanta, Dallas, Seattle, San Francisco, Los Angeles, and Las Vegas. Chicago is the home location so they had two entries.”

Sam rubbed his temples. “The race is a job interview?”

“Of a sort. The race is different than anything you could imagine. Three competitors have dropped out, including Sydney.”

“I don’t need a job.”

“Maxus isn’t any job.” Tracy looked at Sam, her eyes looking hesitant. “Joining Maxus would change your life. We’re a leading member in the most prestigious organization in the world.”

“Don’t you …” Sam said, doing his best to hold off a grin. “... spend your days riding a bike?”

“That’s a cover, Sam.” Tracy’s brow furrowed as she took her time to choose her words. “Maxus is a witch’s coven.”

Sam stared with his mouth open.

“Did you hear what I said? We’re witches, Sam. I’m a witch. Crystal’s a witch. Aimee’s a witch.”

Sam didn’t speak, waiting for the punchline.

“Do you have questions?”

Sam tried to speak but his mouth wouldn’t work.

Tracy’s face softened, “Do you remember the contract you signed on Monday?”

Sam’s blood turned cold. He mouthed the words, ‘Oh shit’.

“Do you remember skimming the contract?”

Fear crawled up Sam’s spine.

“Calm yourself.” Tracy instructed. “Remember to breathe.”

Sam tried taking a couple ragged breaths in and out.

“Good.” Tracy nodded. “I’m sure a lawyer like your friend Tommy would have insisted you read every line. Most people sign documents without reading every word, but the best law firm wouldn’t find anything out of the ordinary in ours. Like all good contracts, the truth is between the lines.”

Sam asked, “You know Tommy?”

“I know everything about you. I’ve had people researching your past. I know the reason you were late for our ride this morning was because Tommy’s ex, Danielle stopped by the house.”

“How do you know that?”

“My people are good.”

“Fuck off.”

Sam stood and Tracy moved her hand. ““You are bound to me, Sam.”

An invisible force pushed Sam back into the chair. “What???”

“It’s in the contract.” Sam tried to stand but Tracy waved her hand, forcing Sam to sit again. “It’s only for a week but during that time you and I are bound as master and student. The contract ends on Sunday at sundown. Until then, you are my charge and as such, Order rules allow me to administer potions, tests, and methods as I deem fit the situation.”.

Sam gulped. “Potions, tests, and methods? What potions? What tests? What methods?”

Tracy sighed. “I didn’t intend to bring you harm. With Sydney gone, I figured our deal would be simple. I’d help you lose a few pounds. You’d salvage my shitty week by letting me perform a good deed. But to help an outsider, Order rules insist we must be bound. That means I am responsible for your actions.”

“Order rules? What’s this Order you keep mentioning?”

“Ah, yes.” Tracy put her hands behind her back, a stance Sam had learned was her teaching pose. “Every witch in the world is part of the Order.”

Sam shook his head, “Like a witch’s union?”

Tracy sat on the bed in front of Sam. “Think of your fraternity. Fraternities at a college are chapters who report to their national headquarters. The Order is the same. Maxus is a chapter of the Order. We select our own members and have our own rules but if we stray too far, they’ll close down our house.”

Sam smiled, remembering the days of hazing freshmen. “Do you have pledge pins?”

“The Order is no joke, Sam. We’ve existed longer than any government in the world. Our courts have case law which goes back a thousand years. Every witch in the world is bound to the Order’s tenets upon pain of death.”

“Death?” Sam repeated, as if that sort of thing needed repeating.

Tracy looked him square in the eye. She quoted, “Ut ex chao.”

“What’s that mean?”

“It’s our motto.” Tracy’s eyes flashed, “It means ‘Order from chaos’.”

“Now you’re scaring me.” Sam took a deep breath.

“That’s good. The Order will do anything to remain in the shadows. We have ever-ready strike teams at our headquarters in Amsterdam waiting to fix problems.”

Sam leaned forward, his head in his hands. “This is a bad dream. Please tell me this is because you’re mad I slept with Crystal.”

Tracy pointed at Sam’s chest. “Can you explain those? Are they a bad dream?”

“No.” Sam placed a hand on his chest and pressed down. “I don’t … I can’t…It’s not...”

“Fear is not helpful in solving our problem.” Tracy put her hand on Sam’s shoulder, her touch bringing an instant sense of calm. “There’s something you need to know.”

“What’s that?”

Tracy said, “You’re a witch too.”

“Me?” Sam looked up in disbelief. “A witch?”

Tracy’s face betrayed no emotion. “Yes.”

“But I’m a guy.”

“Men can be witches, Sam. Don’t be sexist.”

“They can?”

“About one in four witches in the world are men. The Order’s founder was a man and men make up a disproportionate percentage of our leadership.” Tracy’s face looked pained as she made a loud sigh. “You’re a witch and the sooner you accept it, the easier things will go the next few days. You’ve got a lot to learn, and not enough time to do it.”

Sam said, “You’re going to teach me how to be a witch?”

“Not exactly. There’s not enough time for that.” Tracy shrugged, “I’m going to teach you how to win the race.”

“Win the race? Fuck that…” Sam shook his head. “I’m going to Tommy’s house. I’m going to try to forget we ever met.” Sam drank the rest of his coffee and tried to stand but a force pushed him back into the chair.

“I can’t let you leave without knowing all the facts.” Tracy moved her hand as she spoke words in a language Sam didn’t understand. “In the end, it is your choice, but I must warn you. The life of an independent witch is dangerous, and a fool’s errand for someone at your age without training. You need friends.”

“I don’t care.” Sam tried to stand again.

Tracy’s hand moved and Sam found he couldn’t move either leg. “The Order has a name for witches like you.”

“So?” After struggling for thirty seconds, Sam stopped trying to escape.

“Are you done?” Tracy took a passive stance, again with her hands touching behind her back. “Most witches manifest their talent during their teenage years. The Order has an entire department of witches whose sole job is to find teenagers with the talent. They funnel them to schools who can give them proper training.”

“But not me.”

Tracy nodded, “We miss students all the time. Think about it. The United States graduates more than three million high-schoolers every year. That’s three million potential witches in one country. We don’t have the resources to scan everyone so some get missed. Most are no problem as their abilities fade without training.”

“And the others?”

“We call them feral witches. These witches are a potential threat to the Order. Most get purged.”

“Purged?” Sam tried to stand but Tracy forced him to sit.

“A purge doesn’t kill.” Tracy returned to her teaching pose. “The goal of a purge is to return things to normal as our existence depends on remaining hidden. A purge wipes a person’s memories of our organization and rips the magic from their soul. If you don’t win the race, you’ll find yourself on Tommy's couch, with the memories and look from before our first meeting.”

Sam looked down, “No abs?”

“Come on, Sam.” Tracy shook her head. “Let’s stop pretending. Your true interest is the items growing above your abs.”

Sam closed his eyes. So much was happening. He tried to slow his breathing. He tried to make sense of Tracy’s words. “What are you suggesting?”

“You are bound to me through Sunday and I can protect you if you’re accepted into Maxus. To do that you need to win the race.”

The panic boiled through Sam’s blood, “I don’t think I can. It’s too much.”

“You have to try.” Tracy’s face took a serious tone. “I don’t want to scare you but there are things in my world much worse than a purge. I will do everything I can to protect you but our best course forward is to stick to the plan.”

Sam said, “I wish we’d never met.”

“I understand your sentiment. I do.” She put her hand on his shoulder. “But I can’t say I wish we’d never met. You have a rare talent and only need training to blossom. I know I can help you become the person you want to be.” She lifted Sam’s head so they stared eye to eye. “I see you. The binding allows me to see things others can’t. I know you can do this.”

“You think so?”

Tracy said, “I’ve broken a half a dozen Order rules in the past ten minutes by telling our secrets to a non-member. Would I go to the trouble if I thought you couldn’t win?”

Sam drank another cup of coffee but what he craved was a cigarette. It’d been four days and he hadn’t thought about it once since he’d moved. St. Louis to Chicago was three hundred miles by car but it might have been three million the way Sam felt. In St. Louis, Sam lived his days in non-stop sameness as a company brand manager. Only on nights and weekends did Samantha show her face. She holed up in the apartment, only appearing in public for an occasional balcony cigarette before returning to confinement.

“I need to go downstairs.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“It’s not safe, Sam.” Tracy said, “I’ve told you too much of our world and other witches might pick up on it. We can’t risk them finding out your powers.”

“My powers?” Sam shook his head. It sounded unreal. “I don’t have any powers. I can’t do a single card trick. How can I be a witch?”

“Witchcraft is about potential. I’m sure that’s the reason Crystal asked you out to dinner.”

Sam said, “That’s harsh. I’ve lost a lot of weight.”

Tracy said, “You think she asked you out because of your looks? You’re not that cute.”

“Ouch.” Sam said, “You didn’t need to make it personal.”

Tracy held her index finger in the air. “Lesson #1 - Assume everyone has an agenda in the witching world. You can’t trust anyone.”

“Even you?”

Tracy shook her head, “Not even me. You have a chance to win if you remember this rule through the weekend.”

Sam tried to stand and found Tracy had released his bindings. “I assume you have a plan.”

Tracy nodded, “I always have a plan.” She pointed at Sam’s chest. “And it has to do with those.”

“My chest?”

“Your boobs are the key to everything.”

“My boobs. Ha!” It sounded weird to hear anyone saying the word referring to him. The bumps on his chest didn’t amount to much. The breast forms Sam hid in Tommy’s garage filled a C-Cup. A training bra would take care of his swelled chest. Sam pressed down on the area.

“So you did lie. You are trying to turn me into a girl.”

“I told you the truth, Sam. I’m not doing anything to you.” Tracy’s eyes looked up and down Sam’s body in a way that made him feel uncomfortable. “You are doing that to yourself.”

“Me?” Sam stopped playing with his nascent boobs. “No way.”

“I agree. I didn't believe it myself when I saw the readings. It shouldn’t be possible. You aren't trained to cast spells. It takes most witches a year of training to learn basic spells.” She pointed at Sam’s chest. “What’s happening to you takes transformational masters decades of training. Only the most powerful can do what you’ve managed to do.”

Sam pressed on a nipple. “It doesn’t look like much.”

“None of this should be happening since you don't have any idea how to harness your power or store magic. My best guess is the weight loss elixir was a trigger for you. It’s like putting a key into a lock. My scans show you’ve been making the changes each night in your sleep. With every change your magic has gotten stronger, and in turn has allowed you to change your body more.”

“So you think if I change myself enough, I can win the race?”

“Exactly.” Tracy stood still, and stared into Sam’s eyes. “Every witch in this hotel knows you’re feral and they know about your crossdressing. They know you’re in my charge and I let it slip that I’m helping you change genders. They don’t see you as a serious threat and if we play it right … we’ll take them by surprise.”

Sam nodded. “Rule #1. A witch can’t trust anyone. You want me to fool them.”

“Now you’re getting it.”

“Okay.” Sam said, feeling more confident, “So what’s next?”

“To complete the process, you and I are going to spend the night together.”

“You want to have sex?”

“As if. Maxus has rules against a master sleeping with their students.” Tracy smiled. “I’ll be sitting in a chair, funneling magic into you as I feel you run low. If my theory is right, we’ll know the truth in the morning.” Tracy tossed a bottle of Maxus Energy Drink to Sam. “Drink this.”

Sam sniffed the opening. It was the intoxicating odor he’d been smelling since he arrived. He took a small sip followed by a bigger gulp. A liquid hit his stomach then cascaded through his whole body.

Tracy said, “Feel nice?”

“Ohmygod!!!”

“What you are feeling is the rush of a large dose of magic entering your system all at once.”

Sam took another sip. This time the feeling wasn’t as strong. “It’s like a mana potion.”

“A what?”

Sam asked, “Have you ever played that online game … Wizards of Lore?

Tracy frowned. “I don’t play online games.”

Sam ignored her. “In Wizards of Lore and magic users run low on mana, they drink a potion and it fills them up so they can cast more magic.” Sam took another sip but didn’t feel anything. “Damn … the feeling’s gone.”

“You’ve filled your magic. I told you. New witches can’t store much magic in reserve and it takes them a long time to regenerate magic without help.”

“You mean mana.”

“Sam…”

“Sorry.”

Tracy said, “Focus.”

Sam nodded, “Sorry. I’m freaking out. It’s easier to think of this as a game.”

“No one’s going to be able to rez you if you screw up in the real world, Sam.” Tracy grinned.

“Hey! I thought you said you didn’t play those kinds of games.”

Tracy said, “I lied.”

“Ha! Another lesson?” Sam nodded as he took another sip. “I’ve been drinking these for the last few days. It’s never felt like this.”

“Tracy bonked you.” Tracy’s face kept a sly grin. “She drank from you like you are drinking from that bottle.”

“Oh.” Sam’s face clouded over. His memories of Crystal felt so nice. “I … I … wasn’t myself.”

“I’m sure you enjoyed it. I hear she is quite talented..” Tracy winked, “Crystal has always had a thing for virgins. It’s one of her kinks.”

“I’m not a virgin.”

“Close enough.” She held up the data pad. “Remember, this measures everything.”

“Harsh.” Sam stared at the bottle before taking another sip. The label read ‘Maxus Energy Drink’ in Helvetica typeface across the top. In the middle was a picture of a woman riding an old bike. Underneath the woman read the words, ‘Carpe Diem’. Not the most original ad campaign but not terrible.

Sam tried to push the memories of Crystal out of his head. “Do you think that’s the reason Crystal slept with me?”

“It’s impossible to know Crystal’s motives.” Tracy paused a second, “Sorry about the ‘not cute’ comment earlier. I have my own issues dealing with men and I took it out on you. Sharp words work on men better than any spell but you didn’t deserve my snark.”

“It’s ok. I’ve never been good with men or women.”

Tracy nodded, her face growing flush. “There are times I hate being able to read men’s emotions. To be honest, there’s a part of me who’s jealous of Crystal. She always does what she wants without caring about repercussions. I’ve never been like that.”

“Well, if you want...”

Tracy interrupted as Sam started to speak, “No, Sam. That doesn’t mean I want to sleep with you. I’m never going to sleep with you.”

“Got it. Understood. Never bringing up the subject again.” Sam’s face reddened. “Sooo … what’s next?”

“We’re going to sneak out of here and get you a cab. You’ll take it to get your car and head to Tommy’s. I’ll meet you there as soon as I’m able.”

Sam’s car sat alone in the parking lot as the cab sped off. A look inside showed no one had stolen anything. He pressed a button on his cell phone on the ride home. Tommy picked up after the fourth ring.

“What’s up Sam?”

“Did I catch you at a bad time?”

“Not at all. We’re finished at the client’s office and about to head to dinner.”

Sam asked, “Another late night?”

Tommy’s house looked spotless when Sam opened the front door. The dishes he’d left piled in the sink were in the dishwasher.

Tommy sounded distracted, “You know how it is.”

“Yeah.” Sam let the silence linger. This wasn’t a great time for discussion but they might not have another chance. “Danielle stopped by this morning.”

“She did?” Tommy grew quiet. “What did she want?”

“She stopped by to pick up some things from the garage.”

Tommy said, “Did you fight?”

“We argued some but sorted it out.” The Maxus clothing he’d strewn all over the living room had disappeared. Sam found it folded and sitting on top of the dresser in his bedroom, “She’s nicer than I remember. She told me you aren’t divorced.”

Tommy didn’t answer at first and when he did, he spoke one word at a time. “We … aren’t … legally … separated.”

“Not legally separated, huh? That’s an interesting word choice coming from a lawyer.” Sam said, “You told me you got a divorce and Danielle gave you the house.”

“I missed you, man. I wanted you to move to Chicago and I knew what you’d think. I’m paying for the mortgage and all the expenses. Danielle has her own place downtown.”

“You lied to me.”

“It’s not a lie. It’s …” Tommy paused. “Can we talk about this when I get home?”

Everything might be different by morning. “It can’t wait, Tommy.”

Tommy said, “Sorry, Sam. I have to go. Someone is calling my name.”

The phone went dead.

Sam found the items from his makeup bag lined in a brown on the bathroom counter. A company card sat nearby.

_________________________________
Rejin Consulting, Inc.
Danielle Hudson
Associate Partner
Email:dani.hudson @ rejinconsulting.com
_________________________________

Danielle wrote a note on the back.

‘I was happy to see you this morning, Sam. I sense you’re going through a rough time. I’m a good listener if you need to talk.’

Sam loosened his shirt and let it fall to the floor, his eyes staring at the image staring back. He’d taken a chance moving to this town. If Tracy was right, he’d be unrecognizable by this time tomorrow.

A strange town, no friends, no place to stay, and no job.

Sam turned to the side. “What’s the old saying? The surest way to make someone miserable is to give them everything they want.”

The urge to puke forced Sam to his knees but nothing came out. When he stood, Sam retrieved Danielle’s card from the counter. There’s no way he could talk to her. No sane person would believe Tracy’s story.

“What the fuck am I going to do?”

Sam continued to stare in the bathroom mirror until the chimes of the doorbell rang in the distance.

Tracy strode inside carrying bags in both hands. She looked at Sam for a brief second, then took a longer look around to appraise her surroundings. “Nice place.”

Sam pointed to the hallway. “I assume you want to do this in the bedroom?”

Tracy smiled. “Straight to business?” She sat a bag of women’s clothing on the kitchen counter. “I can feel your hesitation, Sam.” She pulled a wine bottle from the other bag. “We should talk. I’m sure you have more questions. I hit you with a lot of info at the hotel.”

“Don’t you want me clear headed?”

Tracy opened cupboard doors until she found a wine glass. “Non-alcoholic.”

Sam had never been much of a drinker since his college days. Tonight, he wished Tracy had showed up with a bottle of Kentucky’s finest. “Too bad.”

Tracy popped the cork on the bottle. “You can’t run from your problems forever. I’m pretty sure that’s how you ended up in this mess.”

Sam said, “You mean the mess you created for me by asking me to sign my life away in a contract?”

Tracy raised her glass and took a drink. “Touche, Sam.” She poured wine into the other glass and handed it to Sam. “I've spent the last few days trying to figure out how someone without training could suppress their magic ability. I didn't notice it when we first met. My suspicion is you learned to hide it from the world at a young age, which put a damper on your abilities so no one could see the person inside.”

Sam took a sip of the wine, then looked at Tracy. “This wine isn’t some weird witch brand, is it?”

“Nope. Store bought. I can show you the receipt if you want.”

Sam swirled his glass, staring as liquid made circle after circle, “Everything you’ve told me sounds ridiculous.”

“Of course it does. I felt the same way when they told me.”

Sam looked up from his wine glass. “Was it tough when you found out about witches?”

Tracy sipped at her glass. “A recruiter approached me in high school. She was pushy and mentioned I’d qualified for a scholarship. I wasn’t a great student and figured it was a scam but they paid for my Mom and me to visit their college. They put us up in a great hotel and plied us with good food. At one point in the weekend, they split the students off from the parents and told us the truth. I thought it was a joke.”

“That must have been rough.”

As Tracy spoke, Sam's mind wondered about the person in front of him. She was no longer a young woman, mid-thirties if Sam had to guess, and yet most men would kill for an evening with her. But still, hidden behind her confident look Sam sensed a young girl underneath, wearing a boxy dress and long braided hair, crouched under the covers of her bed as tears flowed down her face.

“It was rough.” Tracy said.

“Where did you go to school?”

“Asher College. It’s in Massachusetts.”

“Never heard of it.”

“Most haven’t.” Tracy poured some more wine. “I tried to tell my Mom the truth on the ride home but they’d spelled us so our mouths couldn’t form the words. I cried myself to sleep that night and many nights afterward.”

“That sucks.”

“I adjusted. A few years later they sent me to MIT for graduate school.”

“Wow.”

Tracy swirled the wine in her glass. “My first job out of school was at a large tech coven in San Francisco until a spot opened up at Maxus. I’ve been with them ever since.”

“You make being a witch sound like a job.”

“It’s not a job, Sam.” Tracy nodded. “It’s a way of life. That’s something you need to understand before we go forward. I lost touch with Mom and all my high school friends after graduation.”

Sam said, “I’m not close with my parents. I don’t have many friends.”

Tracy looked at the pictures on the wall, “I know you’re friends with Tommy. There’s no shame in volunteering for a purge. You wouldn’t be the first. If we go forward, we both know things will change more for you than they ever did for me.”

“Yeah …” Sam looked down at his body. “It’s like living a dream and a nightmare at the same time. I don’t know what to do. I’m not good with change.”

Tracy stared at Sam’s budding chest. “Despite all evidence to the contrary.”

“You know what I meant.”

“Sorry. Bad joke.” Tracy looked at a picture of Sam and Tommy in college. “When I was in college, I found myself surrounded by legacy witches. They’d gone to the best private witching academies in high school and made it clear to first-generation witches how they felt. For a long time I wondered if I’d ever be as good as them.”

“Were you?”

“I’m in Maxus aren’t I?” Tracy smiled. “Our situations are different but I have a sense of what you’re going through. You’ve felt like an outsider your whole life so you pretended to be something you’re not. You’ve hidden away in books and involved yourself in relationships you force to fizzle out. You can’t do that in the witching world. Every flaw … every fear … every emotion. There will always be someone looking to take advantage of your innermost secrets. What Crystal did to you tonight is mild.”

Sam asked, “Did you know what she’d do?”

“I suspected.” Tracy nodded. “Crystal has never been a deep thinker.” She put a hand on Sam’s back. “I hoped she’d give you a taste of our world but I never would have left you alone with her if I thought she were a real threat. You wanted you to understand how the witching world preys on weakness and discards the unworthy. The only way to survive is to be honest with yourself. Do you think you can do that?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you want a girl’s body?”

Sam stared at a picture of him and Tommy, both well into their cups. He would never forget the night of the junior year mixer with Phi Lambda Phi sorority. Standing next to them in the picture was a girl wearing a goofy grin. She’d told them her name was Danielle. “I’m not sure.”

“Are you serious?” Tracy’s downed the last of her wine, “You’ve dreamed of becoming a woman most of your life. You’ve spent the last ten years living as a woman in private. Now you have an opportunity to make it happen, and you aren’t sure?”

“It’s hard to explain.” Sam felt the start of a panic attack, “I wanted it and I dreamed of it. I closed myself off from the world because of it but at this moment … I don’t know. What if it’s a fetish or something I can live with? What if I’m a man who likes to wear dresses? I’m changing everything. I’ll have to quit my job … my best friend won’t know me … the whole world will look at me different.”

“I’ll help you adjust, Sam. The Order takes care of our own.”

“You said it yourself.” Sam said, shaking his head, “The first rule of your world is not to trust anyone.”

“Aren’t some things worth the risk?” Tracy stood. “Take a good look at yourself in a mirror and tell me you aren’t thrilled with the changes. Our bond tells me the answer. Remember, I’m not doing this to your body, you are. Fear is the only thing holding you back from getting everything you’ve always wanted. You know you want this.”

“It’s a lot to process.”

“We don’t have time for you to get comfortable, Sam.”

Sam looked into Tracy’s eyes, “Do you think I can win the race?”

“Crystal approached you tonight because you scared her today.” Tracy placed her wine glass on the counter. “I don’t know how many times I have to repeat myself until you believe me. I know you can do this.”

Sam nodded as he took a deep breath. “What do you need me to do?”

Tracy held up a bag. “I went shopping while Crystal entertained you. Go take a shower and put on these clothes. I’ll get things ready in the bedroom.”

Sam looked in the mirror as water from his body dripped on the floor. His legs looked as fit as they’d ever been during his riding days. His waist didn’t show a single ounce of fat. He would have killed for this golden tan in college though he’d have difficulty explaining his lack of hair. His chest hadn’t gotten smaller. In fact, the redness looked worse.

Sam turned to the side to see his profile. Like his belly, the area had gotten smaller,his flabby pecs replaced by something much firmer and now pointing up. The breast buds, there wasn’t any other name for it, were surrounded by small mounds and darkening areolas. He’d read enough to know he was past Tanner stage 1.

Sam reached in the bag and found the bra Tracy had purchased. It wasn’t much. Sized 38A. He’d bought many bras in the past, the last a 44D, which were a perfect fit when combined with his flabby chest and C-cup breast forms.

Sam put his arms through the straps then reached behind to fasten the clasp. The bra’s silk material felt smooth as it glided over his skin. The support felt amazing. Sam straightened his posture until he felt an audible ‘pop’ in his back.

Sam said, “Ouch,” though it didn’t hurt.

After a look in the mirror, Sam thrust out his chest. He’d worn many bras over the years but this was the first time he’d seen a bra pressing up hairless flesh, giving the appearance of real cleavage. A strong grip on the counter steadied his feet as tears filled his eyes. The itchy electric feeling of a panic attack flowed through his skin but this time it felt different. Usually, the fear forced him to his knees. Now, he stood tall as his eyes drank in his naked image.

Whether caused by hope, excitement, or maybe even magic, the whirlwind of the past few days swirled in Sam’s brain, dispersing the cloud. Thoughts of Tommy, Danielle, Tracy, and his new job jumbled together as he continued to stare. Tears filled his eyes at the realization he might get the one thing he wanted.

Sam held the dress against his body before putting it on. It slid on easy, exposing curves he hadn’t noticed gathering over the past three days.

“Tracy!”

The door opened in an instant

“Yes?”

“What do you think?”

Tracy said, “You look beautiful, Sam.”

“You think so?” Sam whispered as his tears continued to fall.

Tracy grabbed a tissue. “Your face looks a little splotchy.”

Sam laughed as he wiped his eyes and stared in the mirror. “Would it be okay if I put on some makeup?”

“I insist on it.” Tracy grinned.

Sam sat in the chair and began applying base. Tracy didn’t say a word as she watched from the doorway.

It was weird to have someone watch him do this. Weird and wonderful. He’d held this secret for thirty years and in one day, two women had seen him wearing makeup.

Tracy said, “You’re better at that than me.”

Sam spread the concealer under his eyes. “I had no choice. I was so hideous, getting good applying makeup was my only chance.”

“Stop that, Sam.”

The eyeliner pencil moved with a mind of its own, marking dark lines across his eyelids, “Stop what?”

Tracy said, “You’ve always been a beautiful woman. I thought so the moment we met.”

Sam laughed as mascara covered his lashes, “In the park?”

Tracy moved closer to Sam. “My job allows me to meet new people everyday and my abilities show me their loneliness and their pain. When we first met, I felt a pain so deep I wondered how you got out of bed but when I looked deeper, I felt hope. After we first spoke, I thought it was the hope of moving to a new city but then I saw her. I saw you Sam -- I saw the woman inside."

Sam put the finishing touches on his eye shadow when Tracy held his wig. “Isn’t that too much for bed? I’m going to sleep, and besides, a wig gets hot at night and you wake up to a garish mess that’s hell to untangle.”

Tracy pointed to her own close cropped hair. “You don’t need to preach to me about the benefits of short hair but there will be no half measures tonight.” She held the wig over Sam’s head as they both worked to fix it in place. “That’s better.”

Sam blushed as glanced at the mirror. Tracy was laying it on a bit thick but he appreciated the support. “You are the first person I’ve ever let watch me get dressed. It doesn’t feel weird as I thought.”

“You’re beginning to feel comfort in your skin. That’s a good sign.”

Sam added some lipstick that matched the wig. “I look like a girl.”

“You are a girl, Sam. You always were.”

“Of course. I know.” Sam moved his head from right to left, his red locks flying back and forth.

Tracy held out an energy drink. “Drink up.”

Sam chugged the whole bottle.

Tracy pointed to the bedroom. “It’s time for bed.”

Sam yawned, “Do you prefer the right or left side? I have a bad habit of hogging the blankets.”

Tracy shook her head. “The time for joking is over, Sam. You need to center yourself. We’ll meditate before you go to sleep.”

“I’m too tired to sit.” He jumped on the bed and lay back on a pillow.

“Meditation doesn’t have to occur sitting down.” Tracy spoke in an authoritative voice Sam recognized as an order. “Lay back and relax.”

He sighed, “Okay.”

“Listen to the sound of my voice. “

Sam did as she asked.

“Close your eyes and concentrate on what you want.”

“I don’t…”

“Shhh…. What do you want, Sam? What have you always wanted?”

Sam centered his mind and repeated a single thought: “What do I want?”

His thoughts drifted to Tommy. His thoughts drifted to the nights as a child when he cursed his body. He’d run from these thoughts but he couldn’t run from his dreams. His dreams knew the truth as thoughts turned to Samantha. She smiled as she slipped into oblivion.

Tracy kissed Sam on the forehead as she sensed his brain enter REM sleep. She put another blanket over him, “Sleep well Sam.”

Tracy sent a secure message to Amsterdam:

‘Subject Chrysalis in transition. Impressive results so far. Will send a followup report tomorrow.’

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