Chapter 61
Fireworks
Everyone at the table was talking, while carefully leaving me out of it. I was happy about that and grateful. I'd already embarrassed myself enough by not knowing what to say, saying the wrong thing, having my RTS kick in making me look bustier and curvier, and knowing that the Stirling's knew what had happened earlier in the day. I didn't want to make it worse.
Staying quiet at the far end of the table, finishing off a really tasty piece of luska drizzled in some tropical fruit sauce, suited me perfectly. There was no chance of shoving my foot into my mouth if I didn't open my mouth.
A server came in with the main courses. My Ketea Indikoi Salad looked pretty good. There were a few different types of lettuce, spicy radishes, thin strips of carrots, some unidentifiable vegetables, and bite size chunks of a meat so dark it was almost black, covered in a sweet smelling vinaigrette. It smelled pretty good too.
Once everyone had their food, we started eating.
Taking a bite of the meat, I had to admit it was really tasty. It was a bit like beef liver, but with a nice smooth texture. And the sweet vinaigrette contrasted very well with the flavour. I tried not to be too quick getting another piece along with some of the vegetables, with food this good, it was meant to be savoured.
“How is the salad?” Mr. Stirling asked.
Taking a moment to swallow my mouthful, I smiled and said, “Really good. Thank you for suggesting it.”
“My pleasure. Are you looking forward to the grand banquet tomorrow?”
“Well I've never been to a banquet before, especially a big one like that. But, I wouldn't miss it for the world.” I actually did want to miss it. Ella promised it would be fun, but being in a room full of important dignitaries, wearing a really expensive dress, that just promised to be a disaster.
“Fantastic. Since you and Reginald got along so well today, would you like to go with him as your escort?” the hero asked.
I don't know if my face got paler as the blood drained from it. I was already very pale, so with all my makeup, I might have looked just the same. But almost every instinct was yelling at me to run away screaming. A few of my nerves, the ones around my stomach and pelvis were cheering and having a fireworks display as celebration.
Reginald didn't look very pleased at the offer, his lack of expression was very expressive. I swear I could hear his teeth grinding against each other. Ella was very subtly nodding. Clarice, Calci, and Naomi were grinning like little schoolgirls at the idea. And Mrs. Stirling was giving me a very small, but encouraging smile.
My body tingled. It wanted to change even more. I closed my eyes, trying desperately to calm down. The sensation passed and it seemed like I was OK.
Using the traitorous feelings of joy that wouldn't go away, to help me, I smiled. “Sure, that sounds like a wonderful idea.”
The butterflies in my stomach erupted into a concert, with marching bands, dragons, and a whole array of pyrotechnics. Along with that pleasant sensation, I started to get light headed.
The bit of sun that was still shining through the window was uncomfortably hot. I could swear steam was coming off of my hands. I took another bite of my salad hoping the feeling would go away.
“That's wonderful,” Mrs. Stirling said. “I know today was rather awkward for you two, but it seems like you are both putting your former issues aside. Just because you're going to competing schools doesn't mean you have to be enemies.”
That seemed to be more for Reginald's benefit than mine.
“Right,” I said. I was about to say more, but Mrs. Stirling had suddenly become blue. That wasn't right.
Looking around the table, Ella was just in her underwear. I knew she had a dress on a second ago, what had happened to it? Then I turned to Reginald who was completely naked, and flexing his enormous pecs making his nipples bounce up and down. It was hypnotic.
“Petra are you OK?” Calci asked from up near the ceiling. She was bigger than Rocky.
Grabbing my glass, I took a long drink, hoping that would help. It didn't, it just made the Dwarf's beard grow longer, turn into a pair of hands and start thumb wrestling, while cursing at each other in Orcish.
“Yeah... Perfectly fine,” I said. I felt scales rise up on my legs as I became demon-ish.
“Are you sure?” Mrs. Stirling asked.
Unwillingly my eyes were drawn to the end of the table. Mr. And Mrs. Stirling were dancing a waltz together. She had a rose held in her lips, and Mr. Stirling was singing about slaying a dragon.
“Uh-huh. Everything is totally normal.” It felt like my mouth was working without asking my brain for advice. Hoping to get the attention off of me, I looked down and began eating more of my salad. My teeth turned sharp, shredding the meat and vegetables.
“NO! MURDERER!” I jerked back in horror as the meat in my salad grew limbs and faces. They pointed up at me, screaming and crying as I chewed on my food.
“Petra?” Naomi said. She was standing up, thumping her boyfriend on the head with her spear. Her dress had turned into a tiny bikini.
Reginald came walking over to me, still flexing his chest, and he was only wearing a teeny tiny pair of speedos. I stood up, not sure what he was going to do, my brain wasn't really working at that point, all I knew was I had a silly grin on my face.
He put a hand on my head and cast a spell. His hand lit up, becoming nice and warm, and my body became even curvier and more sexy as I started to turn into a demon.
“My healing spell didn't work,” he said.
“What's wrong with her?” Ella demanded. She looked really, really cute standing there in her underwear.
“I'm perfectly fine. Never better,” I insisted. I really wanted to say that we shouldn't be standing on the ceiling. And it would have also been nice if someone would tell me why Clarice and Gold were making out on the table, but I didn't have control of my mouth at the moment. All I could do was insist that everything was fine.
Mrs. Stirling came running over, with the rose still in her lips. “Why is she shapeshifting?” she demanded, from five different mouths.
“She has RTS,” Ella said. It was hard to hear her since she was standing under a waterfall, running her hands through her hair. “She took a potion to keep it under control, but strong emotions make it flare up.”
“I'm fine. Never better. Everything is perfect.” I tried to cover my mouth, but my arms didn't seem to have any bones anymore. The concert in my stomach had moved up into my chest.
“Dear Gods!” the heroine said, jerking back. “She's been poisoned with Demons Blight.”
That didn't sound good. Fireworks started going off in my head.
“What is that?” Ella asked.
“A poison that can only be cured by a strong god or demon. Anyone who isn't a demon will die within minutes of taking it.”
Mr. Stirling dropped to his knees, praying loudly. It sounded like he was demanding several gods come immediately. Ella was sobbing, asking them to save me, and Reginald actually looked concerned.
“Petra had the shape of a demon!” Calci shouted. “Can we use that to save her?”
“What type of demon?” Mrs. Stirling asked.
“A lust demon.”
“That could work. We have to make her turn into it. She needs to feel lusty!”
Reginald blushed and muttered a prayer. A moment later I found myself in his arms, his lips pressed against mine. My arms went around his neck. Even with the fireworks going off all through my body, it felt good. Scales appeared around my temples. He let me go and I had to grab my chair to stay on my feet.
“She's close to being a demon. But not close enough.”
“Should I kiss her again?” Reginald asked.
“If it didn't work the first time, just kissing her again won't work.” Mrs. Stirling didn't sound too happy about that.
Mr. Stirling seemed to be arguing with someone, shouting that they owed him a favour and he didn't care what they doing at the moment. Everyone else was watching me helplessly, as the world got progressively madder, and my body felt like it was going to explode.
Reginald was shoved out of the way by Ella. She came right up to me, grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me down so my mouth was on the same level as hers. Then she kissed me right on the lips.
Where Reginald had been good, and even enjoyable, this was explosive. Wrapping her in my arms, I happily returned the kiss. It was everything I'd dreamed it would be. She smelled and tasted wonderful, like peaches. My body shifted fully into a demon.
Ella leaned back, breathing hard. Reluctantly I let her go.
There were several moments of silence. Finally Mrs. Stirling broke it. “How are you feeling Petra?”
The fireworks had stopped, but my stomach was doing flip-flops. I burped loud enough to make the nearby dishes rattle. “I don't think I'm going to explode anymore.”
“Is she going to be alright?” Ella asked.
If I could have answered through the blinding pain in my gut, I would have told Ella that I was far from all right. But something inside of me was grabbing my stomach and intestines and using them like a stress ball.
“I honestly don't know,” the heroine said. “I've never heard of anyone stopping Demons Blight like this before.”
Clutching my stomach, I crouched down, partly trying to relieve the agonizing pain in my gut, but also to avoid the sun. I might have survived the poison, but I really didn't feel like the alternative was much better.
There was a flash of light and a very tall, handsome man, with storm clouds surrounding his head appeared in front of Mr. Stirling. “This had better be good,” the God of Storms boomed in a thunderous voice.
I jumped back in terror. Looking like a demon around a god like him, was not healthy. My sudden movement shifted something in my stomach. I farted.
This wasn't a quick little fart. That would have been far too easy. It felt like the very gates of hell opened up and a horde of demons came pouring out in an unending wave of sulphur and gas. The room filled with a greenish haze, and all sound was drowned out by the brown cannonade of the apocalypse.
Before my butt trumpet came to a stop, people were gagging and vomiting from the stench. Even the God of Storms was looking at me with an expression of utter horror and disgust, covering his nose and mouth in a vain attempt to stop the smell.
Standing up, I felt surprisingly good, considering what had just come out of me. My stomach felt emptier than it had ever been in my life. But compared to the pain I'd been having, it was a blessing. Then I looked up into the furious eyes of one of the more important gods of the world.
“I'm sorry,” I managed to squeak out, while gagging at the god forsaken smell I'd created.
Just then the green haze parted a little. The last ray of sunlight hit me right in the face.
Fire erupted from my skin.
Fortunately there wasn't any time for me to worry about that.
Unfortunately this was due to the gas filled room exploding.
__
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Comments
oh thank you for the giggles
after a tough couple of days, this chapter was the perfect antidote.
hopefully everybody is unhurt by the explosion!
Happy to help
And even if they got injured, at least they have good doctors and healing magic.
Hallucinations and Hell-Farts
Wow, now that's a chaotic, action-packed chapter.
Oh yeah
I forgot to say...
Yay! A kiss from Ella! (Even if it's under nearly the worst conditions possible...)
Ella
seems to got it bad for Petra. Will this be the start of a beautiful relationship?
The Demons Blight seems to have side effects like LSD on a human. I wonder if this is a recreational drug for demons.
If this was a movie I know the perfect theme song for after the fart:
"You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July".
The remaining question is, I think: Will the storm god consider this entertainment or an attack?
If the storm god'll figure out who poisoned Petra, well, a quick death for the offender might be preferable.
Thx for another nice (sparkling) chapter^^
Thanks
I hope that one day we find the reason for Petra’s run of luck. Or lack there of. Thanks for the chuckle
Chewtoy
That's the life of being fate's chewtoy. Being able to catch a break... not a chance of that.
Poor Petra, but damn that was
Poor Petra, but damn that was funny. hopefully something worse happens to the ones who wanted to poison the hero.
Now the hero owes Petra for
Now the hero owes Petra for taking the poison instead of him
"Born under a bad sign, been
"Born under a bad sign, been down since I began to crawl.
If it wasn't for bad luck, I wouldn't have no luck at all."
:O
Doom Valley Prep
So is this story abandoned, or is it going to continue?
Any chance of more of this?
Any chance of more of this? Been a long time since you posted last.