For years, I was aware of how dangerous my depressions could be - I've been suicidal more than once in part thanks to the depression
But I really didn't understand that the manic phase was just as dangerous.
its the equivalent of being high as a kite, or being a "happy drunk", in terms of my lack of restraint.
I am so full of happy chemicals just about anything sounds like fun, and boy have I done stuff I regretted once the manic phase wore off.
But its more than just a tendency to do silly stuff. All my emotions are cranked to 11, so I can get angry at the drop of hat.
I also tend to "graze" more while in manic, eating anything I can get my hands on.
But the good news is I'm learning to understand and manage the manic phase.
Day by day, step by step, cycle by cycle, I am trying to do better.
Comments
Kudos
Just remember to keep the shiny side up and the dirty side down. :)
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
I'm going to try my best
knowing I got support here helps more than I can say.
Huggles!
I many 'magic realms', ...
... knowing someone's True Name gives you (some) control over them.
(I call it "Naming the Dragon".)
Now that you know the Name and Nature of your manic phase, your Dragon, you have some control.
A good college friend liked to drink, sometimes too much. He told me "If I give you my car keys (at a party), keep them. No matter what." He knew the Name and Nature of his Dragon, and I was to be his 'fire-proofing".
I think just about all of have a kind of Monitor, a Watcher or Guardian, always working to keep us safe and happy. When it 'sees something', it guides our behavior: "Am I hungry?", "It's Fred - he never pays back a loan.", "It's Sunday afternoon. Is my schoolwork done?" ...
"This place is Safe enough to let some things out."
And you just did let a kinda big Something out. Thank you for trusting us.
having this site and its people as support
has given me the safety I needed to make changes.
huggles!