Thoughts too repulsive to write down

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Lately I'm having a sort of cognitive disconnect that is frightening. I've understood and grown accustomed to my rough drafts being embarrassing. Perhaps it would simply be easier to stroke out and die? Mostly I've enjoyed it despite the painful times. Thank you for being part of it. This is not a suicide note.

Gwen

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"... rough drafts embarassing ..."

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In my early days as a computer programmer, I often more error messages, than my programs had lines of code ...
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Cartoons of writers often show just two manuscript pages on their desk, and several wastebaskets full of crumpled paper, with more littering floor.
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I've seen photos of rough drafts by famous writers - some have more edits & corrections than text ...
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At work, I got a phone call from a co-worker, asking "Did you just send me a pencil stub in inter-office mail?".

She had been feeling 'down' all about all her mistakes. I said "Yes, that's the red pencil I used up marking all my own goofs..."

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