Rita Soto came into the living room in her little black dress ready for her night out with her man, Elmer Rice. They were going on a double date with Elmer’s friend, Nathan, and one of his friends with benefits, Nora Mae West. The dress' hemline was high and showed her wonderful legs, it was tight in order to bring attention to her curves, and the neckline plunged to highlight her magnificent cleavage. She asked her beau, "How do I look in this dress dear?"

Elmer would have said she looked great in anything she wore. The man who adores her said, "You look great in it my love."

Rita then asked him, "Do you think I should change?"

The wise man knew better than to ever tell a woman what to wear. He also knew most of the time when a lady asked her man multiple questions about her outfit, the issue was not her outfit. That they usually needed to hear a compliment. The reasons varied from the woman just having a bad day to the man not paying her enough attention. Elmer gave what he thought was the safe answer of, "No, I do not think you should change. What you have on is flattering."

Rita thought to herself, "His friends are right, Elmer wants me to only wear dresses" The lady who was thinking that her boyfriend had sexist views gave him another out. "How about if I put on that purple pantsuit outfit I have instead?"

There was no way that El was ever going to tell Rita what to wear. He might see himself as a simple farm folk but he knew better than to be foolish enough to directly answer that question. It is her body and he had no right to tell another what to wear ever. The empathetic man tried to reassure his lovely Rita she looked wonderful, "Dear there is no need for you to change. You look amazing in that dress. It shows off your physical beauty so well."

Rita was so disappointed that those jerks that were his friends were right. Then again Elmer hung out with them and her momma always told her if you lay with dogs you will get fleas. Rita tried to hide her displeasure with her boyfriend's antiquated point of views on women's attire. The lady who was getting in a bad mood was not successful, the woman who was looking down at her other half sighed when she said, "Ok, let us get going."

The man who never claimed to be a wise man knew enough from that sigh that something was wrong with the lady who was his queen. In a caring voice he said, "What is wrong dear?"

Rita became over sensitive towards anything Elmer said and automatically took it in the wrong light replying, "It is nothing and you wouldn't understand anyway." She thought, "How can he be so clueless to how hard it is for us women to have to dress to impress other people?"

Jethro Knox, Zeke Davis and Nathan Stephens were enjoying one of their favorite pastimes of sitting back with a cold one on the front porch of the Stephens’ homestead. They started the little drinking session bitching about Rice never showing up to participate anymore. They felt he thought he was better than them for just hanging out with a liberal lady. He needed to spend time with them other than when they were out on a date.

Then after they put their friend down for growing up, those three were laughing to themselves for their plan was working so well that it really dilled their pickle. Not only is Elmer once again going to have to drive them all to Pittsburgh for their annual night out on the town on Halloween. This time they figure out a way to pull a prank on him also. Elmer's costume was going to be a cheerleader.

This was the fourth year in a row that they hit the big city which was 150 miles away for a night out. It was also the fourth year in a row which they figured out a way to have Elmer drive. The first year Elmer just offered and after the run they had, those three decided that they were never going to be the designated driver. The second year Zeke was supposed to drive but at the last moment he had, "truck trouble". The third year Nathan was the ringer and did not throw a ringer in a fixed game of horseshoes where each of the losers had to do one of the winners a favor. Jethro picked Elmer taking his turn driving for their annual night out on the two as the favor. The best part for Nathan was his favor was not to tell Elmer about how crooked the game was.

They needed to come up with something new this year, so it was decided to draw straws to drive, and for the winners to pick out the costume the holder of the short straw would wear. They wanted someone who Elmer would see as either neutral or like him. This was just so their friend did not get suspicious about their con on him. Then it came to Zeke, to get Rita to hold the straws.

Jethro and Nathan thought that Zeke lost the good sense which God had given him when he suggested to get the love of Elmer's life to be in on their plan. Zeke explained to them, "Guys this is going to be so easy. Just get that feminist Rita mad at Elmer. She is all for women being treated as equals, yeah right, if anything, men needed to be treated equal to women. Just mention that Elmer said how he always wanted to see her in a dress. She will buy that because that liberal lady thinks that all men are sexist pigs. We are not, we just know what looks best on women."

Here is the best part you know how if Elmer does not want to do something he just will not. He will say rightfully that he did not agree to the last part. While he will not, that feminist will put pressure on him to wear that cheerleading outfit to teach him to be more understanding to the plight of women. We will not have to do anything other than sit back and enjoy pulling another one over on that rube."

They planted the falsehood about Elmer having chauvinistic beliefs in Rita's head and so she bought it. Zeke was not worried, for he believed women who were feminists went out of their way to find any fault in a man. That was not an unusual opinion for Zeke to have, as he based all of his opinions on his guts and not knowledge.

Rita was not a man hater like Zeke thought, Elmer's girlfriend did not dismiss the lie right away for she was unsure of how Elmer could be so different from his friends. He was kind, considerate, open minded and did not need to follow a leader, the exact opposite of his three best friends.

It was time for those three to roll out the next phase of the plan. To get Rita to hold the straws for the rigged drawing. It was easy, and would be done over a double dinner date Nathan and Nora Mae West had coming up with Elmer and Rita. Nathan and Nora Mae hooked up after the bars closed on most weekends, she had a romantic interest in him and Nathan took total advantage of that. He was not ready to settle down but when he was he knew it would be with her. It was great for him for he got to be single when he wanted to and also had a girlfriend when he wanted to. One day he will marry her, but not right now, that man was just having too much fun to start a family.

Nathan felt lucky when he saw Rita in that little black dress. It was going to make it easy to remind her how horrible Elmer's view on women's attire was, and it had the added bonus of him seeingt her smoking body. The dog of a man just wished that Nora Mae would wear a dress like that once in a while.

Nathan got to work on getting Rita on board right away, it was just the best way to enjoy the evening. As the man with the plan greeted her he said, "Rita, it is great that you wore that dress just for Elmer."

As those words came out of his mouth Nathan got a great idea, use that lie on Nora Mae. If the girl he was going to sleep with tonight believed that a strong independent woman like Rita would wear something just to please her man, she would do the same. Nathan thought to himself, "Life is good."

Elmer did not like his friend saying something so backwards to his better half and he quickly told him, "Quit that dude."

Hearing Nathan make that ignorant comment irked Rita. How could Elmer have his friends think she dressed to please him, instead of herself? She took Elmer telling Nathan to quit it, as not to bring too much attention to his fashion sense for women. Rita did not say anything, but she was going to remember this when she finally had that talk with Elmer about her wardrobe.

Before they ordered dinner Nathan brought up how they were going to decide who drove down for their big night out in two weeks and the added stipulation. As expected Elmer was a wet blanket and only agreed to the driving part. Nora Mae asked if she could come along and Nathan said no for there was no room for her in any of the cars of the guys. He did not want her to cramp his style or a chance to get some action.

Nora Mae wanted to go with Nathan for she was smart enough to know why he did not want her to be there. She worked long and hard to get him at the point where he did not even try to get another woman at the local bars. The lady who wanted to be married was not going to let a boy's night out set her progress back. Nora Mae said, "Well, I can drive us all down in my van."

This could be a huge wrench in the machinery of Nathan's weekend. If he did not come up with something soon, then Zeke's plans would be ruined, not to mention his freedom down in the Burgh. It suddenly came to him, "Honey this is for the guys to bond. Rita only comes with for she is just about married to Elmer. He told us that she would not let him come without her."

Elmer made a mental note that he was going to have to have a talk with Nathan and the guys. He was getting sick of them joking around in that manner, they either needed to grow up or Elmer was going to stop hanging around with them anymore. So he said, "That is not true."

Rita shot Elmer a stare, how could he make her sound like she was controlling to his friends. No wonder they come off how they do, they must think I am a bitch. Nathan was so happy at that look for he knew the potential disaster actually turned out to add more fuel to the anger Rita had towards Elmer. Nora Mae dropped the subject for those daggers coming from Rita's eyes made her not believe Elmer.

After the dinner, the two couples went out for a couple of drinks. Nathan and Rita started to have a conversation and Elmer stayed out of it for he wanted those two to get to know each other better. Nora Mae talked with Elmer for she wanted him to keep an eye on Nathan while they bar hopped on Carson Street in Pittsburgh. If she could not be with the man she wanted that night at least she will know how he acted.

Nathan was going to fix the straw drawing right then. He started it by reminding Rita again about the dress and said, "I will say that is so nice of you to wear that dress for Elmer. I hope that he thanks you for doing that for him."

Rita said, "He does not. That man just does not understand what it is like to wear a dress. The worse part is that I love to show off my femininity but feel like I can't freely now for that asinine view he has"

Nathan could not believe how smooth this was going. He could not have scripted the night any better. He must have done something good to be this lucky. Nathan said, "How would you like for him to wear something he would not like?"

Rita said, "How, I am not like him and would never think that I should tell other people what to wear?"

Nathan with a devilish smile on his face said, "Easy fix the straw contest so he gets the shortest one. All four of us were planning on going out dressed as football players, but with him losing he can go as something in a supportive role, like the waterboy."

Rita did have morals and found that as being dishonest and said, "I don't think so. That would be unfair."

Nathan played on her sense of fairness."It is also unfair what he thinks about you having to wear a dress. I know you think of me as a caveman, but I would never dream of telling a woman what to wear.

“Do not think of it as setting him up, but a chance for you to be able to teach him a lesson about respecting what other people wear."

The mad woman hearing that got an idea and shared it with Nathan. "I will fix it but I get to pick what Elmer wears. He is going to be your cheerleader. He will know what it is like for someone else to want you to wear a dress."

Nathan almost gave away the plan by how happy he was, he could not wait to tell the guys that if anything goes wrong they could blame that stupid feminist. He was quick on his feet to act like he was happy for her. "That is a great idea, you need to make sure that Elmer learns that lesson and having a talk with him after he is put in a dress is the best way to have it sink in his thick head."

The next day all the guys went to Elmer's place for the drawing of the straws. To fix it was simple; Rita just had the short straw closest to her and she picked the order when each one of them drew their straw.

They all drew and Elmer got the shortest straw and everyone started to laugh.

Zeke said, "It looks like Elmer is going to be our chauffeur again this year. You must really loved us driving down route 30"

Jetro said, "Sorry about the bad luck Elmer. Guess you will be our waterboy. That is fitting for you were the least athletic of us all."

It is funny how people whose best days are behind them looked at them with rose tinted glasses. Elmer was the most athletic of them all. He played cornerback and was all-section. It was just he did not have a love for football so he quit playing after his junior year. Yet Zeke and Nathan thought that they were the best athletes of the group for they were named alt captains for one game their senior year. That was a honor given to all the seniors for one game.

Nathan smiled and acted like he was joking, "Or better yet our cheerleader."

Elmer said, "I will drive but I will not dress as a waterboy or a cheerleader. I did not agree to that part."

Rita smiled and said, "Honey I swear you did agree to all of it and so does Nathan. You might not have worded it right but Nathan and I both think you did. Plus, I think you would be cute as a cheerleader."

Elmer begrudgingly agreed, "Fine if my Rita wants me to dress as a cheerleader, I will have no issue wearing an outfit which looks like a bad jumpsuit."

Rita talking down to the man who was going to get a lesson said, "Oh no honey everyone knows that a cheerleader costume at halloween is always a sexy female one."

Everyone started to laugh and started to tease Elmer. He did not care about the childish behavior of his friends, he expected them to be mean and not treat others how they would have wanted to be treated. One thing he could not understand is why they found so much pleasure in putting other people down.

Rita's boyfriend did care about her doing so. That was so unlike her; he knew he had to figure out what was up with her. The last couple of weeks she did seem a little distant, but he chalked that up to the pressure she was having at work. Rita had to deal with budget cuts for the domestic violence safe house she ran and Elmer knew how much of herself she put into that place.

After his friends left, Elmer said, "Rita honey you know that I did not agree with that why did you say I did?"

Even with the fact that she lied to her man, Rita got defensive so he would drop the subject. She accused him of calling her a liar.

One thing Elmer did not like was when anyone put words in his mouth, and if he did not want to find out what had been bugging Rita her accusation would have worked. "I did not say that and you know that. I am straight forward.

“I am saying you must have misremembered. You know that something as childish as picking out what someone else has to wear is something I would not agree to. You always said one of the things you like about me is that I do not act like a boy anymore. So, I just find it strange you not only thought that I agreed to that immature stipulation, but you are on board with it. Is there something you would like to talk about?"

Rita could not believe Elmer did not count wanting her to wear a dress all the time is not the same as picking out what someone else had to wear. She said, "How about me wearing dresses all the time, is that fine?"

The man who had no idea what his girlfriend's last statement meant said, "If you don't want to wear a dress fine. I don't care what you wear."

Rita did not want to get into a fight at the moment. She wanted to wait until Elmer actually knew what it was like to have others want you to wear something before she told him about knowing his desire for her to always be in a dress. She said, "Yeah, right!"

Elmer just dropped the subject for he knew that it was going to go nowhere. There was something up with Rita and she just did not want to share it with him. The good boyfriend respected Rita's privacy and changed the subject to their plans for Thanksgiving, his favorite holiday.

The next day Zeke called Elmer to start really rubbing his new outfit in. This was going to be fun, it was so great for him to put other people down in jest. He did not care if they cannot take a joke, or if the words were mean when taken in their normal context. It was just fun for him to tease others. He found great humor in the humiliation of others, but on himself, not that much.

Zeke greeted his victim with, "Hey there Elmara did you get the outfit yet. It is going to be so great to see you with pom poms. Remember the cheer I love the most is Zeke, Zeke he is our man, if he can't do it then no one can "

El was not in the mood for Zeke's tomfoolery. "No for one simple reason, whoever is going to pay for it needs to be here when I order it. I did not agree to it so there is no way I am paying for it also."

Zeke said, "Oh I guess your purse is as tight as your wallet is Rice."

The man who was outgrowing his friends said, "No I am just not paying for you and the guys’ entertainment. It is enough that I pay to go to Pittsburgh. This outing is not going to cost me anymore money than it already did. I have a football outfit which I paid for already so I am not paying for a cheerleading one also."

Zeke did not like that he was not getting under his friend's skin. He just loved to annoy people and he was not finding the pleasure he wanted from the phone call. The practical joker said, "It is only money and we will see what Rita has to say about that?"

Now Zeke bringing up Rita and it being only money did annoy Elmer. He was starting to worry about her, she was just not her normal self and now she was not sharing. The troubled man started to think that maybe the relationship was in the downfall. That their time together was coming to an end. Rita knew how important it was to be open in a relationship.

It is true that Rice had the view that it is only money and there are so many more important things in life than cash. Even with El's cavalier attitude towards money, Zeke owed him a lot. The man in the red saying about money reminded his friend about the debt and with Elmer being annoyed at his friend he was going to bring it up.

The irritated man said, "Fine I will pay, but speaking of money, you do owe me $500 and I want it now.”

Hearing the disgruntled tone and Elmer relenting on paying for his own humiliation was exactly the outcome of the conversation which the prankster wanted. Zeke's victory was short-lived when he heard about his friend wanting to be paybacked right now. He was good for the money and was going to get around to it one day, but right now that $500 would hurt his vacation fund and he was going away on Thanksgiving week. "Dude you now I will pay you back, but I can't right now. I will give it to you at Christmas."

Elmer would not relent on the money. "No, like you said it is only money so you should be fine to pay it right now."

Zeke said, "Come on, you are just mad that you drew the short straw. I need that money for my family's ski vacation during Thanksgiving. I can't go broke and I would be."

Elmer said, "No, I am not mad that I drew the short straw, I am mad that you made a stupid childish stipulation which I did not agree and that my girlfriend is going along with it for some strange reason."

Zeke gave the quick rebuttal, "Do not take your anger toward her on me dude. That is not what friends do."

Elmer said, "I am not taking my anger out on you, and you know what else friends don't do? It’s borrowing money and waiting months to pay it back. It has been over six months now and I want my money."

Zeke knew that he had no choice but to pay back the money, maybe he can borrow some off of Jethro and Nathan for his family’s get together. "Fine, you can have your money dude. This is not cool."

Elmer laughed and said, "Owing people a lot of money is also not cool."

Rita was under the assumption her love was drawing the short straw in stride, she also thought that he must have believed her on not being clear about not going along with the stipulation. He did not bring up the conversation since she ended it with "yeah, right" and also agreed to model his cheerleading outfit for her in full makeup. He even took her needling him about how cute he was going to be.

A week before their trip to the big city Rita could not wait for Elmer to be in the outfit. The woman who was going to teach her better half a lesson wanted to get started with it. She wanted to say all those degrading things she assumed he thought about how she looked in a dress. Mention how great his legs look and how she liked how his skirt swayed while he walked. She finally said, "Dear you said you were going to model being a cheerleader for me."

Elmer looked at her and said, "You never asked me to do that. You might have worded it wrong for I thought you did not want me to model it for you."

The lady who was only trying for him to be a better person got so mad and said, "I did so ask you to model it."

Elmer asked, "Are you calling me a liar?"

That got her more pissed off but she did not know what course of action to take next. Elmer gave her the benefit of the doubt and she knew he would bring that up if she did not. She wanted to be mad at him for lying to her, but knew she started this game of deception. The honest man resorting to lying made her know he was mad about the situation. She was smart enough to figure out that his anger was about her part in it.

Rita not wanting to give up said, "You must have misunderstood my question, so please do what you agreed to do."

Elmer said, "I am, I agreed to not model the outfit for you."

Rita was going to get his goat at least. "I know why, you just do not want me to see those sexy legs of yours. I bet you are going to look so cute in that outfit and if you are cute enough I might like to see you in it more often. I am just going to eat up saying all those things you think about me in a dress to you."

Elmer again had no clue about what Rita was talking about. He knew that she was really upset about something. Does she think that I am like my friends who gawk and catcall women? "What exactly is it I think about you in a dress?"

Rita said, "You know."

The frustrated boyfriend knew he made a mistake by resorting to saying yes just to lie about the conversation like Rita did. It might have felt good but caused so much strife between them right now. Trying to get the woman who had the keys to his heart to open up Elmer said, "I do not dear, that is why I asked. I know something is bothering you and we need to talk about it."

Rita saw a chance to finally say what was on her mind to her boyfriend. The woman about to settle her grievance said, "I will tell you what is on my mind after you have changed dear."

Elmer was not going to be manipulated into doing anything, "I am not going to do anything just so my girlfriend will talk to me about an issue she is having. Plus, who knows if you are even going to talk to me after I change."

Rita was hurt by the accusation, "So El doesn't trust me now."

Elmer said, "When it comes to this cheerleading thing, no I do not. You were gleeful when I drew the last straw and acted so out of character. You joked about me being a cheerleader and the guys went along with it. If I didn't know better I would have sworn you wanted this."

Those words hurt the wounded woman even more for her lover was right to not trust her. In fact, he was actually more trusting of her than he should have been. Rita felt belittled in the presence of the better man and could not stand it so she left, "Honey if you are not willing to do that for me, then I am going home. Call me when you change your mind and will do this little favor for me. It is nothing but putting on a dress."

A couple of days later Elmer finally broke down and called the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He did not understand why him dressing like a cheerleader was so important to her, but he was going to do so. This was for it would not cause him any harm other than to his ego. Yeah he was worried about how he would look.

Rice swallowed his pride and called Rita saying that he would dress for her, but she had to tell him what is on her mind right away. Rita was happy that she was getting her way and said, "My love I promise you I will. You have to trust me, you will see how it all ties together when we talk."

El said, "I do trust you and I was wrong not to show it when you asked me to put on a cheerleading outfit. It is harmless. You have been acting strangely lately and I allowed that to override my decision making. I am just concerned about you. I am sorry and I love you. So come on over."

Hearing her man's words for some reason made Rita feel small again. If she took the time to self analyze she would know why, for what she wanted to do was wrong on many levels. She was breaking the trust between her and the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. The woman who thought she knew better was going to put down the man she loved to prove a point instead of just talking about the issue. She was untrusting that she could get an honest response from her boyfriend by just talking to him.

Even feeling bad about the transgression she was about to commit, Rita lied to herself about how it was for the common good. That lie made her feel better about what she was about to do to the man who made her whole. She believed that she was also going to make him whole by correcting his bad behavior. Sometimes doing the right thing is hard, she told herself.

When Rita arrived at Elmer's home he was happy to see her looking and acting more like her normal self. After a couple of minutes Rita built up the nerves to do the dirty deed to the man she cared about. Jokingly Rita said, "Hun, it is time for us to see how cute you are going to be this Saturday. I know I will like it."

Elmer did not know what he was walking into and laughed at her joke. He thought that he was doing the right thing for the woman he cared about was feeling better. Whatever was bothering her was being resolved by this harmless exercise

El was feeling good about dressing as a cheerleader for it was lifting his girlfriend's spirits. He could tell with each step getting the costume on, Rita was becoming more relaxed. The clueless man took the snide comments Rita was making as she joking around.

After his transformation the man who was ready to cheer his team to victory looked in the mirror. To tell the truth he was a little worried that he would look and feel foolish. He did not, in fact he liked how he looked. This was because Elmer had a great costume and will not look just like any other guy celebrating Halloween. Even with the skirt being extremely short, he did not feel that exposed. The shorts and sheer pantyhose he had on made him feel fully dressed. Being thin framed he did not mind his midriff showing. He shook his head thinking about how his friends who were already growing a beer belly would look hilarious in this outfit. The leader of cheer ruffled his pom poms a little and said, "Yeah, team!!!"

The man who drew the shortest straw was feeling better about it and wanted to make it more fun. The man with the pom poms in his hand said, "Rita you were right I am a little cute in this. I would not want to wear it other than for Halloween. I just thought, it would be even more fun is if you dressed like a cheerleader also."

That was the worst suggestion he could have given her at the moment. The love of his life was going to give him a lesson and she was going to be gentle until he made that suggestion. All the lady who was seeing red could think was that Nathan was right, Elmer had a thick skull.

Rita smugly said, "I did not draw the short straw so others cannot tell me what to wear. I do not want to show off my legs and now you are going to know how it feels when I have to.
I am going to go as a doctor and dress respectfully and you have to show off your body and have people judge you for your appearance."

They both felt that they were not on the same page. El did not know what made Rita go back to acting weird again. Rita could not understand why Elmer was being so insensitive, so much like Zeke and his crew. Right then Rita thought that maybe she was wrong about those guys. It could be that they were not as bad as Elmer, it could be her man was better at hiding his sexist attitude. The other guys were just more gruff than the polite man in front of her.

Even with trying to have empathy for his girlfriend's issues, the man who was trying to be like Job lost it. "I try to be nice to you and give you your space about whatever issue you are dealing with, but I had enough. You never have to wear a dress and I sure as hell do not judge you by your looks. So tell me what is going on before we get into a big fight over me not knowing what is bothering you."

Rita was offended that Elmer was trying to play innocent of his caveman attitude. How dare he try to play her for a fool. "Yeah right, like I do not need to wear a dress to make you happy. Please do not try to deny that."

Instead of trying to be compassionate, the man under the unwarranted attack by who should have been his biggest ally strengthened his defenses. "I have no idea where you are getting that idea but you are wrong. If you don't want to be open to me fine, I do not care. Just leave right now and do not call me unless you are ready to tell me what this is about."

Rita retaliated with, "You know what this is exactly about, just say it and we can work it out."

Elmer was done with this conversation. "Like I said. I have no idea what this is about but would love to know. I do know one thing I do not like your attitude lately and if you do not want to be constructive just leave. I am serious about you leaving and do not call me until you are ready to talk about this like an adult."

Rita got furious that her man was still trying to play innocent. She wanted to talk it out now but not how the man who dressed like a cheerleader did. No, not until he had to be in public dressed in that outfit. Then she would tell him what she was under the misinformation that he already knew. "Fine, I can understand why you can't man up about this now for you don't look like one, so I will leave."

Rita stormed out of the house like an angry hornet. Elmer was hurt by how she was acting and her words. It was not the words themselves, but who they came from. Before she could leave Elmer yelled at her “You did not keep your word. You were going to tell me what this was all about.”

It took a couple of days until Rita tried to call her man. Hearing her man mad and also the truth made her not want to talk to him. There was no answer so she left a message. The message told Elmer that his woman was still not going to be mature about it so he did not call her back. The hurt man was not going to rehash the same fight with her.

The day of the night out on the town was upon them. Rita once again called Elmer to see if they were even still going. She also needed to see if they were still a couple. The two of them had not talk in over a week. The last couple of weeks before that the relationship was a little strained. Since the drawing of the short straw Rita and Elmer did not do anything to strengthen their bonds.

The call was as short as the fuse which was on top of the Elmer Bomb. Elmer confirmed they were going. Then when Rita started to talk to him about her week he said he was busy and did not have time to talk. Elmer’s girlfriend did not like how short the call was. Her man always made time for her. Elmer’s outlook was that a person would make time for what was important to them.

Rita went over to do his makeup. The look on his face and body language told her not to say anything right now. She would just wait until he was weakened by how he was treated while they were painting the town red to start giving her lesson to the man she loved.

Zeke and the other guys knew not to show up until right before they left for the steel city. They could not believe how out of sort their buddy was about their little prank. He should have been taking it better. How he was not being a good sport made them tricking him not worth it. What good is it to put your friend in a dress and not be able to tear him apart about it.

As they drove off Zeke was not going to let Elmer deny him his joy and started in on the cheerleader. "Hey there Elmara with how nice you look, you are going to have all the guys flirting with you."

The childish attempt at humor had no effect on the man driving his friends. The man with the bow in his wig found the joke itself lame. His other half on the other hand found the comment helpful to the lesson her misogynist beau needed so she joined in. "Zeke, I like how that sounds. I am going to call her Elmara all night. I am scared that I am going to lose my man to a man tonight."

The man who just wanted the night to be over still did not show any emotions as he stated his displeasure with Rita. He expected the childish behavior from the three amigos in the back. His girlfriend, no. She was mocking him harshly and according to her that was verbal and mental abuse. Elmer let some of his anger show and said “Rita if you call me Elmara one more time, you better use that from now on.”

Rita knew that comment got to him and the retort was all bluster. She saw his nose start to twitch a little. That is a sure tell sign he was getting mad. Rita was not mad about what she perceived a threat. Her man was just trying to lessen what was coming to him. Also, the threat was harmless. Elmer was not going to make the woman he loves stick with calling him something so degrading. Elmer’s woman hoped that the others would see Elmer could do nothing to them. She wanted them to join in with helping her break him down so she could build him back up. “I will Elmara. Since you seem to like it so much.”

Jethro, not one to be known for subtlety said, "Yeah, Elmara likes her new name as much as she likes sucking cock.”

They all laughed and it became louder when Rita added the quip, "The sad part is I bet that Elmara will be better at it than me."

Rice still did not want to show any emotions, but his hand clenched the steering wheel more and the truck speed went up by 10 MPH. He felt betrayed by the person whom he shared everything with. He would give anything for the night to be over. It was because he knew that Rita and him were going to have a huge fight by the end of it and he prayed that it was not in public. The last thing he wanted while all dolled up was to draw even more attention to himself.

Nathan liking to be cruel in his teasing went for the jugular by adding the wisecrack, "Yeah we all knew that Elmara was a fag, look at how she always let Rita boss her around."

Rita said, "Of course she does, that is why I am wearing the pants tonight."

As soon as those words came out of her mouth she knew it was wrong. She went too far and knew so for she saw a tear fall from El's eye. Rita assured herself that once she had the talk about her man needing to respect what she wants to wear it would smooth over what she said. To make the reconciliation easy Rita made the decision not to razz her man for the rest of the night.

The other three kept on riding their friend. It was so much fun to gang up on someone when they cannot fight back. With all the laughing and enjoying themselves Jethro messed up when he said, "Zeke it was a great idea to put Elmara in a dress when he drew the shortest straw."

Zeke quickly tried to cover it up by saying, "Jethro you know the idea was whoever lost would be put in a dress."

Rita was so mad at herself and also the three amigos behind her. She knew at that moment she had been played. The worst part was they made it look like she was in on it. While she was, they made it look like it was for a prank. At that moment she knew that her El should have never been in her doghouse and she was so in his. She turned around and scolded them, "Yinz have had enough fun at El's expense, now just drop it and look forward to having a good time tonight."

Zeke could not resist getting one last rub in, "Oh it is so nice that the person who wears the pants in the relationship is sticking up for the lady within it."

After being silent for the entire drive Rice finally spoke up. Rita trying to be nice after all the mean things she had done accelerated the Elmer bomb’s lit fuse. The normally laid back man finally blew up "Rita it is fine. I don’t need the person who wears the pants in our relationship to protect me. Y'all can keep on having fun, afterall I did draw the short straw.

“You've been quiet lately Rita. You should join back in dear. Also, call me Elmara. You said you were going to use it from now on. Remember I said you better and you said you would. Anyway, I could tell how much fun you were having by how loud you were laughing and how mean those words were. I want to see more of the real you that you have been showing me. I really liked that one you said about me being a better cock sucker than you. Come on, say it again.”

Rita did not answer. She planned on staying quiet and not saying another word. Elmer’s girlfriend was not going to inflict any more pain onto her man. Also, the Elmer Bomb went off and Rita wanted to try to get away from ground zero. Even if she was not trying to lessen Elmer's anger at her, Rita knew that even if Elmer needed to learn that lesson, she went about it the wrong way.

Zeke was no gentleman and pushed Rita down so he could get away from the upcoming concussion from his friend's explosion. “If Rita won’t then I will. I bet that you will be better at sucking cock than she is, Elmara.”

Elmer said “You’re right Zeke. You know the sad part? Cocksucking is a skill and even with all the practice she had at it Rita still sucks at sucking.”

Rita trying to defuse the situation she helped make said “El we went a little overboard tonight, but it ends now. No more messing with Elmer, or him and I are going back home.”

“Rita, keep your word! You said you were going to call me Elmara so do it. You expected me to keep mine so I will. I am our ride down to Pittsburgh so we aren’t going home. You might be wearing the pants tonight, but you do not boss me around.”

Nathan wanting to make sure that Rita, not him and the guys, took the blunt of the soon erupting Mount Elmer said “Elmer you got us. Yes we fixed the drawing and Rita came up with the idea of you being a cheerleader. That was a good one.”

Rita tried to defend herself “Bullshit Nathan.”

Nathan “Rita, don’t lie just because we got caught. We came clean about this, you should also. You did so the night we had that double date. I suggested that we dress him as the waterboy. You came up with the cheerleader. You were the one who said cheerleader when we drew the straws. We only went along because it would be funny.”

“Nathan, don’t worry I know who is to blame for this. Everyone keep on having your fun. Just remember payback is a bitch and that is how yinz had me dress tonight.”

Hearing confirmation on how cruel her words and actions were along with finding out she was taking the blame made Rita try to sink into the passenger car seat. The payback part was also a concern. She knew that Elmer was not going to believe the truth. She could state about being tricked into thinking he wanted her in a dress all the time, but those words would be useless. She did not believe him when he denied the accusation the couple of times she confronted him about his friends’ lie.

The rest of the drive down she looked out the passenger side window. She did not want to take a chance and see the pain and anger on the face of the man who made her a better person. This was for she knew he knew she caused that pain and anger.

Even with Elmer telling the three amigos in the back to keep on having fun, they knew better than to. Not saying anything was not about having remorse.The last thing those three wanted to do was cause any of the blame to come to them. Listening to Rita would entrench her being the mastermind of this prank.They were still going to joke around about tonight with themselves and were so looking forward to telling everyone at their social club back home about how cute Elmara was.

Elmer and his passengers finally made it to the South Side. As the truck turned left onto Carson Street the only sound inside it was the radio. Elmer drove past Station Square where he parked the last three years. The question which everyone wanted to know but dare not ask was answered. The driver informed his passengers that he was going to drop them off at Jack’s. Jack’s was on the other end of Carson Street

Halloween was the night when people could put on disguises and act a little out of character. They could get away with some actions or outfits which would put them in a bad light. The street was filled with countless amounts of girls dressed as sexy nurses, witches, schoolgirls, and somehow even candy bars. Somehow, in America, having a short skirt attached to anything makes it a sexy halloween outfit.

Of course there were many cheerleaders. When the truck passed the first group of ladies dressed as part of a cheer squad. Elmer spoke up again. “Hey Rita, do you think I look better than those ladies in the outfit you picked out for me?”

“Elmer, sorry I went too far.”

“Dammit Rita, you know not to call me Elmer and answer my question.”

“No, you don't look good at all in it.”

“That hurts, the woman who says she loves me picks an outfit which makes me look like a fool. Why would you do that? .”

“Elmer, I said I was sorry. Can we talk about this without your friends around?”

Trying to have the much needed talk later in private came off as Rita trying to dictate to Elmer. He was not in the mood for her bossing him around anymore. “No Rita. You do not get off from using Elmara and planning this by saying you are sorry. Zeke and his boys were in on this with you, so they should also hear what we have to say.”

The conversation had the desired effects. The three masterminds and Jethro in the backseat were as uncomfortable as Elmer was in his skirt. Zeke hated that he knew he was going to have to deal with the ramifications of getting caught. Nathan knew his friendship with Rice was never going to be the same. Jethro felt bad seeing the couple in the front seat breaking up in front of him because of the three amigos wanting to get a laugh. He knew his time as Elmer’s friend was over. The remorseful man was going to come clean. He at least wanted Elmer to know Rita was just a pawn. “Elmer, be easy on Rita, we tricked her.”

Elmer shouted “Jethro shut the fuck up and stay out of this.”

Zeke was still no gentleman and saw a way to make sure the Elmer Bomb blast was centered on Rita. Maybe if he got Rice to aim all his anger at Rita the Zeke could get out of this scott free. “Yeah Jethro. You never get between a man and his woman.”

Nathan was more than happy to help Zeke. “Jethro, let them talk this out. We only helped Rita. We don’t have to defend her.”

“Honey we can talk about this when you drive back to Station Square to park.”

“Don’t call me honey. Call me Elmara or don’t talk to me Rita. Also you are getting out at Jack’s.”

The truck got to Jack’s and everyone got out. Elmer only handed the three amigos their ID and the guys $50 each. They only wanted a twenty each, but dare not correct Elmer. They knew he was about to blow up again. They also did not question their friend keeping their wallets and phones. The guys had no pockets and were going to keep them in Elmer’s purse.

Rita got no money because she had none on her. There was no reason for her to carry cash, she loved using her debit card and her man always took care of what could only be paid with cash. She hated that she was going to have to ask her man for money. “Elmer, can you please give me a twenty. I have no money on me.”

There was no response for her man. “Elmer give me some money so I can get something to drink before you get to Jack’s.”

Still no response from her man. Rita knew why but was not going to cave in and hurt her man once again by calling him Elmara. Jethro on the other hand thought that Rita did not know how serious Elmer was about his girl staying true to her word. “Rita you have to call Rice Elmara tonight. You said you would.”

“I know Jethro. I don’t want to.”

Then Rita paused, she let her anger at herself be displaced to Elmer. If her man was going to act like a little boy then she was going to treat him like one.

“You know what, skip it. Elmara give me some money!”

Elmer laughed.The clueless absurdity of that lady thinking she can boss him around was amazing to him. Even after Elmer stopped giving into her whims somehow Rita still thought that she could get what she wanted from him.

The mocking laughter hurt Rita. This was because she knew her man was right to do so. That after Elmer’s girlfriend tricked him, mocked him and now she was giving him orders. The biggest reason she thought her immature school yard name calling was going to hurt the man she loved. Her anger got the best of her. All it did was make Elmer’s newly formed opinion of her become more solidified. To her man, Rita was becoming more and more an immature girl not ready to be in a serious relationship “Rita dear, you are wearing the pants tonight so you need to pay. Hold up as I get it out of your purse.”

“You know I don’t carry money.”

“Then I will give you your debit card.”

Jethro wanted to make up for getting Rita into this mess. He did not trust the big city and did not want Rita to have her card on her. “Rita I will get you a drink.”

As the four passengers were walking towards the bar, they heard Elmer’s horn. They turned around and he had the window down. Elmer informed them they were only one-way passengers in his truck tonight. “Hey, remember I said payback is a bitch. Well, the bitch is here. We drew straws for the ride down to Pittsburgh. Nothing was said about the ride home.”

Rita wanted to start talking sense into her man. She knew he was mad but to her this was an overreaction. Him getting them back would do more harm than good to Elmer. Leaving her high and dry would add to the fight which those two were going to have. Stranding his friends would cause a shipwreck and end his friendship with them. Rita said “Elmer.”

The Elmer Bomb was still going off. The betrayed man was not going to let his woman go back on her word. Until Rita was caught she was having fun by putting him down. She needed to get back into his good graces before she could start to act like nothing has happened between them. “Don’t you fucking talk to me unless you are going to call me Elmara. Like you said you would. What fucking part of that don’t you understand?”

Nathan protested. Yeah getting each other good was fun until Nathan was the one who got real good. “Being the drive home was implied and you know that.”

Elmer pointed out how tricking someone could backfire. The person tricked could start playing dirtier than you. “The ride might have been implied, but it was not stated. It is also implied that a man’s woman and his friend would not set him up like yinz did, but yinz did it. It was also implied that we only drew the straws for what was agreed upon, yet you forced me to go along with the fake stipulation. If you think I am going to do anything more than I have to for you after yinz trick me, then you must think I am a bigger fool than I am.”

Zeke was not going to waste a night which he should be getting wasted on trying to find a way back home. "Oh get over yourself. This was not the first time we tricked you. We have been pulling having you drive us down to Pittsburgh for the last three years. We upped it a little this year. Just man up and take it like one.

“Oh yeah, you are not a man tonight, you are a sexy cheerleader. So be a dear, have a good time not drinking tonight and when it is over drive us home. Then when we get back, make us a sandwich. We will all be laughing about it when you get your sense of humor back."

El said, "I know I will be laughing about it on the drive home, just thinking of yinz trying to get back. It will be great."

Before the man who made it so the co-conspirators against him were the one who were holding the short straw could drive off, Jethro asked him to wait. Elmer honored the request. The man so wanted to deny his friend's reasonable request to reconsider. Jethro only said sorry.

Hearing Jethro being remorseful actually made the Elmer Bomb’s blast radius grow. The simple man being the better person got to Elmer. He was about to get back to those people standing outside of Jack’s and one of them had the nerves to show remorse. Elmer wanted the taste of revenge more than forgiveness so he lied to himself. The man in a cheerleader outfit told himself Jethro was just trying to manipulate him. Saying sorry was only to get Elmer to be their drive home.

Before the others could follow Jethro’s lead Elmer revved his engine to drown out anything they might say. The four knew the conversation was over so they backed off from the truck. Saying anything else would have been as useless as an umbrella stand in the desert. Only two would admit it, they went too far and deserved what was given to them. Elmer sped out of the parking out and drove home.

*************

Nora Mae West loved working the occasional shift at the local volunteer fire department social hall. Doing so was a way to help keep the company afloat and the tips she got on those busy nights they needed helped keep her savings afloat. If helping the community was not enough to make being behind the bar worthwhile, there was also another benefit by also helping herself. Being the barmaid at the social hall did not feel like a job. To her and the laid back patrons, it was like she was hosting a party. No one was in a rush to get their drink. The gratitudes for being served were as strong as the moonshine on the bottom shelf. By the end of her shift everyone had had at least a small personal conversation with her. Lastly she would be done when the crowd thinned out and could go on the other side to have a couple.

Her enjoyment for what she was doing for the night got halted by the joke made by Elmer. He just drove them down and left them without their wallets and cell phones stating something about only being the ride down. That was a stupid joke and now instead of joining the other revelers she had to drive down to Pittsburgh to pick up Nathan and his friends. Even with Nathan saying he will call at eleven, she knew it would not be until 1:00 AM. That boy will want to have all the fun he can have in the big city. The only good thing about having to pick him up is that Nathan will see that he can depend on her. That maybe he will move forward in their relationship. There was a good man wanting to grow out of him and she wants to be with that man.

Nora was thinking about the good old fashion tongue lashing she wanted to give Elmer when he came walking into the club. Even with being dressed as a cheerleader, the light shining behind Elmer gave him a menacing silhouette. The outline of the dark figure was screaming leave me alone. The shadow walking towards her, also made Nora realize that there was much more to the story than what Nathan said. Elmer was too laid back and easy going to be this upset over something small. He also would not be in such a bad mood if he was playing a bad joke.

Even with the warnings being as loud as warning sirens coming off of Elmer a couple of people at the club said something. They were too distracted by the sounds of laughter in their head about the cheerleader outfit to know to be cautious. Their ribbing was in good nature so they got offended by the silent stare Elmer gave them.

He sat down at the bar and Nora went to get him his regular, a nice cold Iron City Beer. She placed it right in front of him. Elmer not looking up from his drink said the mandatory thanks and requested a double of CC, Canadian Club. Nora just served the man who was radiating a leave me alone vibe. It would be best to get to the bottom of this with Nathan.

50 dollars does not get one many drinks in Pittsburgh so an hour after Elmer showed up Nathan called again. He wanted to have as much fun as possible tonight so he was going to ask her to join them. She would be more than happy to hang out and buy a couple of rounds for him and Zeke. Jethro and Rita left them right after Elmer drove off. Those two were more concerned about getting home. Rita had a cousin who lived above Carson street so Jethro and her went there. The plan was to stay there for the night and Jethro to offer to pay for a ride home in the morning. Nora told Nathan to call back in 15 minutes so she could tell them when she could leave.

Nora asked Beth, the regular barmaid, if she could leave now. The flow of customers to the bar had started to dwindle by then, people were leaving the Halloween party and the others who were staying were drinking slower. Beth knew why and said yes. She might be a little rushed getting the drinks but that was fine. Nora had help during the most hectic part of the night.

Before leaving Nora went up to Elmer. She wanted to help Nathan and Zeke get their belongings back. “Hey Rice, can you give me Nathan and Zeke’s wallets and phone.”

Not looking up from his drink Elmer responded to the simple request with one simple word, “No.”

Nora was not happy that someone she saw as a friend would not do the easy thing she asked. “Listen here Elmer. I don’t know or care why you fucked over your friends. I can tell you are mad so I am going to let it go. It is between you and them.

“I am trying to be nice to you by giving them their wallets and phones. It will make it easier for yinz to make up.”

“We’re not going to make up. They will get their stuff the next time they see me. Now go pick up your boy and leave me alone.”

How matter of fact Elmer stated the friendship between them was over was a wake up call for Nora. Those four have been friends since they were in their mother’s wombs. All of their mothers were friends when they were pregnant. “Rice, what happened?”

“You said you didn’t care, leave me alone.”

“I don’t care what happened. I do care about why you are so upset.”

“This outfit is what happened. They got Rita involved in playing a trick on me. They thought it was so funny. I can’t believe she is so fucking childish.”

Nora's outlook on her future with Nathan along with her opinion of Rita changed. That boy she thought had a good man hiding in him went too far. Trying to get someone’s woman or man to play a joke on them was wrong. Rita was wrong to go along with it. How could she think that having her man dress in a way which people would mock him could turn out good. “Oh my fucking God, Rice.

“Beth can I please have a Rolling Rock.”

Beth said “Hun, don’t you have to pick up Nate in Pittsburgh.”

“Not anymore. I found out why he got stranded and he deserved it. “

As she was putting the green bottle in front of Nora, Beth said, “I will tell him you are not coming when he calls.”

Nora did not want to be denied the pleasure of hearing Nathan beg. “Oh no, no, no. I want to make sure he knows that I will not be waiting for him anymore.”

*******************

Zeke’s mood was almost as pleasant as the windy raining overcast morning. He hated the fact his mom woke him up so early. He was a grown man, she had no right to set his schedule. The petulant adult protested to his mom on waking him up by saying he was an adult and could sleep as long as he wanted. Ms Davis was not going to suffer any foolishness for the fool of a child she raised. She quickly retorted his weak protest by stating that to be treated like an adult one has to act like one.

Zeke knew his mom would not let him go back to sleep and went about finding out what was so important to her to scrape his plans of sleeping in and doing nothing after a hard night of partying hard. She informed her son that he was going to Elmer’s house to apologize to his friend about the practical joke. Hearing that he had to face Elmer and lie made his throbbing of his headache become harder.

Zeke objected to the new plans of his day. Him and his friends did nothing wrong. There was no way that he knew the practical joke would go so astray. Elmer should have chilled about the joke and joined in the laughter. Zeke thought that if Elmer joined in with laughing that somehow his own laughter would become with Elmer instead of at him.

Ms Davis had enough of having a conversation with her son. Hearing what he did to Elmer was bad enough, then her son had the nerve to call after midnight for a ride home from Pittsburgh. That call frightened Zeke’s mom, there was never any good news from a call at that time of the night. The boy of a man infront of her was so self-centered when he was stranded he waited to get a ride home until after having fun. She told her son that any joke which makes someone’s friend look like a fool is not practical.

Finally Zeke arrived at Elmer’s door, he felt like a fool because his mom was in the car waiting for him. His mom went along because she did not trust him enough to say what she wanted him to say. The drive over did not help Zeke feel good about himself. On the entire way there his mom just kept on telling her son he needs to grow up. That he needs to quit acting like he was a teeenager. That he needs to go on to the next phase of his life.

Elmer answered the door and Zeke put a plastic smile on his face. The words which were about to be said were as honest as the drawing of the straws. “Elmer, sorry we got a little carried away with the harmless joke we played on you.”

“What do you want?”

“Dude, I just said it. I want to say I am sorry for the misunderstanding last night. For the mistake we made.” As Zeke was extending his hand to offer a shake to seal the apology he continued “Come on let’s bygones be bygones. We will all be laughing about this in a couple of years.”

“No we wouldn’t. You went way too far. This isn’t the first time you pulled that shit on me. I am done with you. Stay here and I will get your wallet and phone.”

“Come on Rice. We messed up and did not think. Get over it, this was a mistake. You are blowing it so out of proportion. You need to get over yourself. You are being oversensitive.”

Funny thing about people saying others are being oversensitive. They are always lacking any empathy. They are only seeing the intent of their actions and not the results. The people who are downplaying what they did never even think how they would feel if it happened to them. They are too concerned about not having to pay for their actions, or thinking that a laugh is worth making someone look like a fool. People hate to admit that they get a little bit of sadistic enjoyment from the misery of others.

“Zeke here is the thing. You did think. You only thought about yourself. You did not think about how your stupid joke would go down. You were too worried about getting a laugh.

“Here is what is going to happen. You are going to wait here as I get your stuff. Then after I give it to you, you will go to your mom’s car and tell her I said hi.”

As his friend went to get his stuff Zeke was working on how to make things better between them. Instead of trying to see things from Rice’s point of view, the schemer was going to play on their families’ friendship. Rice would not like Ms Davis being upset over something small. “Come on dude, my mom is going to be pissed.”

“I don’t care. She will be pissed at you not me.”

As Rice closed the door on Zeke, the coldness from his friend made him shudder. There was something final about this ending. Fear came to Zeke that it will never be the same between him and Rice. Blaming his friend’s snowflakeness did not bring any warmth to the coldness inside Zeke.

The next visitor to Elmer’s was Nathan. This visit was just a repeat of the first one. Nathan tried to downplay what happened as Elmer held his ground. Then Nat tried to play on Elmer’s emotions by saying it would help him smooth things out with Nora if those two made up. Elmer once again said he did not care.

The sun was finally shining when Jethro came to Elmer’s door. The weather was not the only change in this visit. Jethro was remorseful. The guilt-ridden man said “Elmer, I messed up. I should have thought about the joke. I am just here to get my wallet and phone and also Rita’s purse.

Not having to deal with any more self justification was also a welcome ray of sunshine in the deadness of Elmer’s life. Also not having to deal with Rita right now added some warmth. Elmer was still too mad to listen to her about her role in the prank.

After giving Jethro what he asked for Elmer went to close the door. The man standing alone on the porch said “Elmer, you really need to hear Rita out. We played her good. She was really mad about thinking her man would be so worried about what she wore. That it made her feel like an object. She was not trying to get a laugh, but get you to understand her. Hear her out when she has the strength to talk with you. Take care.”

*************

The social hall was packed with the regulars waiting for the start of the Steelers game. Being surrounded by the noisy crowd drowned out the inner dialogue in Zeke and Nathan’s head. The beer and double shots of CC on the bar were also doing the same. A couple of the regulars giving them props for pulling off the joke was going to be used as a retort to rationalize why their inner voices were wrong.

Then Jethro walked in. Seeing their friend who abandoned them coming back to the fold was going to help even more prove what they know was right as being wrong. As their friend was getting closer the self-righteous sense of them being in the right got closer to winning out. Jethro then was next to his seat. Once he plunked his ass down there all will be well to the two still in the land of denial.

Jethro walked by. Zeke and Nathan tried to not see Jethro walking past them as a bad sign. There were many reasons why that seat was still as empty as their apologies to Elmer. Most of these reasons were good. Their friend could have needed to relieve himself. Jethro might have wanted to say hi to someone else. He might have wanted to go to the cigarette vending machine to get a pack of smokes.

Zeke and Nathan greeted Jethro as he walked by. Jethro’s missing greeting should have been a sign. Their friend was always the one to acknowledge them before they did so to him. The feeling of everything being back to normal finally went away when Jethro only grunted hey back at them. The lack of effort in returning the greeting made sure those two saw it as Jethro doing a formality.

Nathan was going to speak up about Jethro not sitting down with them. How dare he try to take this holier than thou attitude towards them. He was part of the prank and knew it was not that bad. Zeke did not want to hear anything about last night, so he stopped his friend.

Jethro was sitting at the bar alone when Nora Mae came in. He just wanted to watch the game in peace. A couple of the regulars came up to talk about last night and he shot them down quicker than a frat boy did a shot. Those people only wanted to get a laugh at Elmer’s expense. A little giggle last night was not worth the price. He lost a good friend and his good friend lost a good lady.

Nora Mae wanted to set one of those people who wrongly played Elmer right. She knew that Zeke and Nathan were not worth her time. Even if they were, those two would put up a fight, try to explain why she was the one who was wrong and needed to be set right. Jethro would not. He was passive when it came to people. Jethro went along with what people said to just keep the peace.

Nora started in on Jethro right after she asked if it was fine to sit down. The unplesantries would be out of the way before the game started. “Jethro, I thought you were better than those two. You know better than going along with them. You need to make this up to Rice and also Rita. You messed with their future to get one over on your friend.”

Instead of hearing the expected I know something as unexpected as a person staying dead in a soap opera happened. Jethro fired back “You have room to talk, Nora. If you are going to try to preach to me just sit somewhere else.”

Nora’s friend had an excellent reason for his unpredicted response and she was about to find out what it was when she said “Don’t get an attitude with me. I am trying to make sure you don’t fuck up again by messing with people.”

The sassy response caused the irked hackels of Jethro to raise. Wanting no conflict he only mentioned without any details why he was not putting up with Nora being a hypocrite “Talking about messing with someone’s relationship. How about Bruce?”

Sometimes one word, in this case a name, can be an entire story. The name Bruce was shorthand for the old “hilarious” ongoing joke about Jethro’s imaginary boyfriend. Zeke and Nathan were not homophobic, they just found how flustered Jethro got to be a hoot. The merry pranksters did not care that the discomfort came from Jethro’s insecurities. That he was concerned about how others might not see him as a man. Jethro was also worried about making sure he did not put down gay men when he said no. There was nothing wrong with being gay but a forceful denial could make it come off as so.

Around two years ago when Jethro brought his new girlfriend, Barbra Ann McCoy, around to meet the group, Zeke and Nathan thought it would be cute to rattle Jethro some. Jethro being thrown off balance as a little kid learning to ride a bike made her believe the fooling around of two court jesters.

After the two bad comics left, Jethro was able to regain his composure. Having his confidence back made it where he was able to mostly convince his lady they were joking. There was still a little part of her which thought Bruce might be real. Jethro might be bisexual. That would be fine with her as long as he was honest.

Nora came into the social hall giggling and laughing with her friend Mary. She was already feeling as fine as full grain leather. She saw Jethro with a lady. That must be Barbra, the girl Jethro has been talking about. Nora went right over to introduce herself. She had to meet this lady. Each time Jethro talked about her his eyes lit up as much as she was feeling right then.

Barbra took the meeting as her chance to clear up the manufactured confusion from Zeke and Nathan’s joke. Being asked about Bruce gave Nora a great idea, to add to the joke. She found how red Jethro became cute and adorable. She went along with selling the validity of Bruce. Even after Jethro asked his friend to tell the truth, she went with the joke. Not having any of his friends to back him up made Barbra believe that Jethro was not right for her. He had to deal with coming to terms with his sexuality. There was no way she was going to take the chance of falling in love with someone who has a chance of coming out as not being able to return that type of love. Barbra put protecting herself from heartache over a chance at an amazing relationship with a good man and broke up with Jethro.

Jethro spoke to all three of his friends after joining a club no one wanted to become a member of, the newly dumped. He tried to call them out on their joke. It was three against one so instead he went along with them saying it was for the best. That lady was no good for him. How could anyone who did not trust you be the right one for you. That he was just being oversensitive. The heartbroken mad caved in to his friends self serving arguments. Jethro was going to protect himself from losing three friends over the chance he was right in calling them out.

Nora did not want to feel small so defend her actions. “That is different. You two were just starting to go out. Plus I was drunk and joking around. I did not know she was taking me seriously. I was laughing.”

“Here are the real differences. You played the joke and it was on me. Come on Nora, you know that joke was wrong. You, and those two over there.” Jethro was pointing to Zeke and Nathan at this point. ”Yinz defended it so admittedly I believed I was being oversensitive. I saw you were wrong last night when El and Rita were fighting. I grew up last night from my mistake. You, you are still trying to defend yours.

“So why don’t you just find somewhere else to sit so I can enjoy the Steelers whooping ass on the Brownies.”

“Jethro I learned, I never made that joke again.”

Nora staying meant once again, one of Jethro’s friends was not listening to him. Jethro had enough so got up and said “You never said you were sorry.”

Jethro was not elegant with his words. They were as simple as his wants. Even with not being able to pontificate as well as Oscar Wilde, his few words' meaning came across clearer than anything that long winded orator said.

Nora knew it was time to face the truth about that night. “Hold on Jethro, I was wrong. I am sorry. That was fucked up of me to still joke when you told me to stop. I did not respect you then and I was not respecting you now.

“I just know how mad Rice is and wanted to get that point across to you. Those two wangrods over there will not understand, but you would. I want you and Rice to be able to make up. I want to help.”

Jethro plunked his ass back down on his seat. “I know. Right now is not the time to worry about me and Rice’s friendship. Rice has bigger issues, like him and Rita. They need to work it out and hopefully will. We just need to have faith. Now let’s just watch the game.”

********

After getting her purse back, Rita waited a week until she went over to see Elmer. Rita called him everyday leaving a message and never got a return call. Both of them needed the time and space. Rita to gain the strength to face what she did. Elmer so he could carefully mull over the words of wisdom from Jethro. Those words ringed true, but Elmer wanted the advice to be false. He wanted what that wise fool said to be self-serving. It would be easy for Elmer to not listen to Jethro if his former friend was getting something out of it.

She was apprehensive knocking on the door. This was going to be the end of her relationship with the man she loved. The relationship was over because of lack of communication on her part. If she had been straightforward with him about the concerns which were planted in her head, his words would have acted like weed killer and got rid of them. Instead they grew by the careful gardening of his friends.

“Elmer, can we talk?”

The answer to Rita’s question came in the form of an action. The man standing at the door just closed it right in Rita’s face.

“If you aren’t going to talk to me at least let me get my stuff. I will bring yours over.”

“Go ahead.”

“Elmer, hear me out. I know you are mad about the prank. I want to explain why.”

Instead of engaging in a conversation with Rita, Elmer turned his attention to television.

The dismissed miss was not going to be ignored. Rita shouted “Dammit, talk to me Elmer!”

“Rita, I told you not to call me Elmer. Call me Elmara or don’t talk to me.”

“Elmer…”

“Shut up!”

“Don’t you dare tell me what to do. You will treat me with respect. You being mad at me does not give you the right to talk down to me.”

Elmer was like a knight in a jousting contest and knocked Rita off her high horse with his response. “Don’t you dare talk to me about respect. You set me up, lied, and tricked me. You mocked me. You used my nature against me. You did not treat me with respect so you do not get any from me.”

“If you would just calm down then I can explain why I did that. You won’t so instead of getting to an understanding we are fighting.”

“Don’t put this fight on me. You started it with playing that stupid joke on me.

“You had been acting funny lately so I relented and went along with the made up conditions because I was worried about you. I should have stood my ground. I should have known you were finally just showing your true self to me.

“You put me in a dress, mocked my manhood and laughed and somehow thought that I would not be mad. If you have not noticed I have been mad about this since the fixed straw drawing. Now I know I was stupid to be worried about you. This was all about shit and giggles.”

“Elmer if you will just listen to me you will understand why.”

“Dammit, I told you not to call me Elmer. If you will not listen to me why the hell should I listen to you? “

“Because I am trying to set the record straight.”

“Don’t give me that. I tried to set the record straight when I knew you were upset about something. You would not let me. Now, only after you see the price of playing the prank, you want to talk.

“If we do talk then it is on my terms. You can start setting the record straight by keeping your word. I kept mine. If you are not willing to keep your word how can I trust what you are going to say. If you are going to keep on going back on your word then just get your shit and go. I don’t have time for your bullshit.”

Rita could not bring herself to keep her word. Having to say Elmara to the man she loved was just painful to think. Putting herself in pain was too hard.

Elmer went back to watching television as Rita grabbed the open cardboard box with her name on it. Looking into it she saw the cheerleading uniform on the top. That outfit was not hers so she took it out of the box and placed it on the table.

Out of the corner of his eye, Elmer was watching Rita. When his soon to be ex placed that unwanted outfit on his table Elmer jumped out of his chair. Then he forcefully walked over to the discarded garment, picked up what Rita was trying to leave behind and placed it back in the box. Rita was not going to have that reminded of how she messed up with her and went to take it out.

Elmer stopped her. “You came here to get your stuff, so you either take all of it or none of it.”

“Elmer I came here to talk with you. You are being a fucking jerk.”

“You stupid bitch, what part of do not call me Elmer don’t you understand? I told you if you called me Elmara one more time to use it from then on. You know that I don’t mince my words. I meant it and if you want to talk to me you keep your word. Now either take everything in that box with you or leave the box. Goodbye.“

Even with being wrong, her job at the domestic abuse safe house made the protector of women get defensive. Rita was not going to take any verbal abuse from her man even with how she treated him. There was no way that proud woman was going to be disrespected. "I was wrong but you do not have the right to talk to me like that. Calling me a stupid bitch is verbal abuse and I will not take it."

El shook his head, he could not believe that she went there after the stunt she just pulled and how she has been talking to him. "Listen here, you started with the abusive behavior. I held back until now. I am just giving you what you gave me. It is simple. If you don’t want to be called a stupid bitch then don’t act like one. If you don’t want to be called a stupid bitch don’t start with the name calling. You called me a fucking jerk. Isn’t that name calling? You said I was a cocksucker. Isn’t that verbal abuse?

“I want to make it clear, right now you are nothing more than a stupid bitch to me. Stupid for playing that joke on me and a bitch for how you are trying to act like I did you wrong for calling you out on it and making you keep your own word.”

The defender of downtrodden women became open to what her man said after she heard her defense. "I only did all those things for your own good."

She has heard abusers and victims use variations of those words which came out of her mouth. She could not believe that she had that mentality. She looked down for she knew she could not look the person she was going to hurt in the eyes and said, "Elmara,I am sorry, you are right. There is no excuse for my actions. I was abusive to you.”

Elmer might have been pissed at Rita, but he did not want to end what they had together. He did not want to until he heard her side. Her finally trying to own up to what she did, made Elmer give an opening to her. He would listen, so he would not be hesitant to feel what was in his heart and share it with her. Elmer was not strong enough to open up to a wall, but could to a window. The simple country man needed to know the truth instead of just ending something special on his speculation. “Babydoll look at me when you talk to me. Why did you go along with them?”

“I I I can’t.”

“Yes you can, you are strong. You can tell me what happened.”

“I can’t”

“You can, you are strong enough to help all those ladies down at the center. You can be strong enough to help yourself.”

“I am not going to help myself by hurting you. I am not going to call you Elmara. I much rather have you think that I cannot keep my word than cause you any more pain.”

“Then call me El. We need to get to the bottom of what is going on with you, babydoll.”

Elmer changed his stance. He might have been as stubborn as a pack of determined donkeys but Rita changed her stance. Rita’s man knew at that moment they would be dealing with the cause instead of the symptoms. Elmer was not going to waste time putting a bandage on the major gash in their relationship, but he would take forever to stitch that injury up. The band aid might stop the bleeding but once that cut was open again the bleeding would resume. The stitch will lead to the relationship healing and becoming stronger.

“I am stupid. I listened to those jerks. I could not believe that you could be so different from them and still be friends. I deal with so many men who seem good but are terrible. I believe the worst in you from seeing it in others.”

Elmer motioned Rita to come to him. His arms were as open to her as they both were to hearing each other. As she was embraced by her man Elmer used his words “Babydoll, don’t call yourself stupid. That is abusing yourself. If you are not going to put up with it from others, you better not put up with it from yourself.

“Your job is a hard one. It has to take a toll on you. I respected your privacy when it comes to the women's shelter but should not. I need to be your emotional support. I did not want to have to deal with those stories from where you work. How those men treat those women get me so pissed off. I need to take a step back and not be so emotionally involved when you tell me those stories.”

“My job is hard but it is also so rewarding. Seeing one of those women regain their strength makes it worth it. Instead of just using you to vent off anger I need to share the joy from that place also. I will.

“I need to make it clear I know you never cared about what I wear. I am sorry for thinking the worst in you. I will make sure we talk.”

“I will also make sure we talk. I should have pushed the issue and stood up about the change in what was agreed upon. I was concerned about not upsetting you more. I should have been concerned about what was upsetting you.”

Rita then stayed true to her words about opening up. “Rice, how about Jethro?”

“I am done with him. He is the butt of those two jokers so often he should have known better.”

“He is and that might be why he thought what was going on was fine. He could have gone along so he was not the target once again. I am not saying he was right in doing so. I will say that once he saw it was wrong, he admitted it.

“Instead of staying out and drinking like the other two, Jethro made sure we got home. He has been checking up on me and also got Zeke and Nathan out of his life. You should at least hear him out.”

“I will. I want to. We will hash this after the next time we see each other. Don’t worry we will work it out great. Now the game is about to start, so why don’t we curl up on the couch and watch it. We will talk more later. I would like it if I came home to you every night you know.”

Elmer and Rita only followed some of what he laid our. The two reconciling lovers did curl up on the couch but the game was not watched. Instead they talk about the present and future. Rita and Elmer both agreed to share more about wjay is on their mind. To say why they are feeling how they were. Those two also made the decision that Rita would move in with Elmer at the end of the year. Them living together was s it was easier for them to be there for each all the time and make it easier for them to open up when needed. The next two months she would stay there as often as she wanted. Which ended up being very often.

With their relationship becoming more intertwined Elmer asked if it was fine to call Jethro to come over during halftime to watch the second half of the game. He wanted to get the friendship with him back. Rita agreed and asked about Zeke and Nathan. Elmer said he was done with them. That he outgrew those two and they have not really been friends for a long time. It took the prank for the loyal man to realize that.

Waiting for Jethro to walk in Elmer and Rita were happy. They knew that there will always be work but that their love for each other will end up always growing stronger. They have both matured and will not draw the short straw again in how they handle their relationship.