Lost a family member today

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The last of my grandparents, my grandmother from my father’s side, died today.
My grandmother always took an interest in my writing. She never really understood my projects or understood the plot lines I told her about but she always said to keep working on them and that she was proud to see me working on something. That is why I incorporated her into two books: the grandmother who cared about the main character and at time doled a bit of “sass” about things. Those two universes seem changed now as I try to understand how I feel and how those characters (who are extensions of myself) will make it without the person who offered support in too many ways.

I guess this is why I reflect on the past
Why I like to look at old photos and try to understand.

Comments

My Condolences

tmf's picture

My Condolences on your lost

Sweet Hugs tmf

Peace and Love

what

Maddy Bell's picture

they said.

Look after the living for the dead no longer care.


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Madeline Anafrid Bell

Cling

Cling to the memories, not to the loss.

That said, please accept my condolences.

Sincere Condolences on your loss.

Any loss is never easy, as really all you have now is memories, and photographs. When you are ready, may I suggest you talk with family members still living, her friends, neighbors, and anyone else who may have known her. Write down the stories they tell. Do an ancestors search at least back to her parents, further if possible.Write your findings down, and keep those records for future generations. Tell everyone in your family and your spouses family about her. Don’t let her memory and accomplishments die with your generation.
Again, my condolences to your and yours.

Don't let someone else talk you out of your dreams. How can we have dreams come true, if we have no dreams?

Katrina Gayle "Stormy" Storm

My heartfelt condolences for your loss

Allow me to suggest that you make all possible effort to be there for the wake, the memorial service, the funeral and the burial. The active participation in these rituals can be a big help in the whole grief process, and help you obtain a positive closure on that part of your life for some good memories of the good times you had with your grandma.
The suggestion of researching your ancestors and making a written record of it, is also very good. And it can also be very therapeutic.

Warm hugs and greetings,
Jessica Nicole

There is just one...

Mantori's picture

... total certainty in life... Death...

I can not imagine what you are feeling, because I lost my last grand parent in 1988, and the one before that in 1981. The other two I never got to meet. They died years before, one in 1955 the other 1968. For me it is that long ago, and to be honest with you I never knew them that well. Our family was honestly never that close.

There are no words sufficient when a close and loved family member dies. There just are no words.

But as creative people we have the tools to visit those who have died in our art as often as we like. One of my close aunts died in last week, she lost her battle against cancer and I still struggle to understand why such a beautiful human being had to die of such a horrible disease.

There are no answers to these questions, there is only the moment and our emotions in the moment. Feel it, be honest to yourself about what you feel and live through it.

Remember her, honor her, love her and celebrate her life and influence on yours. I am sure that is what she would want.

"Life in general is a fuck up,
but it is the rare moments of beauty and peace
in between the chaos,
That makes it worth living."
- Tertia Hill

Hugs

erin's picture

Just a hug,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

Hugs

Losing a loved one and their support is never easy. Time does help... My condolences...

So very sorry ...

Words can only help a little.

Let your grieving go along on its own.

Not much I can add to what others have said.

Take care of yourself, and if reasonable to do so, take care of your Dad; she is his Mom...