George Baker looked at the newspaper clipping in his hand, just to confirm the address.

He walked down the busy street, passing various shops on the way to his destination. As he walked, he reflected on things.

George and Catherine

by Susan Brown

George Baker looked at the newspaper clipping in his hand, just to confirm the address.

He walked down the busy street, passing various shops on the way to his destination. As he walked, he reflected on things.

George was 52 years old, overweight and not in the best of health. He had diabetes and heart trouble and nearly died before a triple bypass had saved him in the nick of time. He had married Jennifer just after leaving university, but it hadn’t worked out. He had lived by himself now for nearly 30 years and was a bit of a recluse. He worked from home designing web pages for small and medium sized companies and very rarely ventured out of his flat on the third floor of a fairly modern but not very interesting block of flats. He didn’t see much of his neighbours as they mostly went out to work.

George didn’t want to be like this. He was a victim of circumstances. It wasn’t his fault that he was born in the wrong body…a body that was ravaged by disease… a body that should have been female.

He looked at the slip of paper again; he was getting close to his destination now, just a few blocks away. He paused at a shop with pretty dresses in the window. He wished that he had the figure for some of the clothes. He particularly liked the little black dress and loved the way it hugged the shape of the stony gazed mannequin as it stared sightlessly at him.

George sighed and looked down at himself then smiled slightly as he imagined what he would look like in that dress, even if they did run to his 24 size! No, he would have to make do with the rather larger and more flattering clothes that he wore in the safety and seclusion of his own home. He only wore male clothing when he was going out, dressing as close to en femme as possible in private. Knowing that he could not pass physically as a girl, meant that George didn’t feel right going to any one of the several groups that he knew of in London that had evening meetings. He was too shy and not confident that he would look anything else but ridiculous going to places like that looking the way he did.

‘Number 229, this is it.’ he said to himself.

The wig shop was small and he nearly went past it before he saw the wigs in the window and the unobtrusive sign above stating the rather naff name…Hair Today.

George knew that the shop was run by someone who was transgendered, he had emailed her several times to make sure that he would not be uncomfortable or laughed at if he visited the shop and was asked to arrive about lunch time. In the past, George had bought his wigs on EBay and had been less than satisfied with the results. This time, he decided that he needed to try some on and see what they were like before buying.

Looking up and down the road and seeing that he wasn’t being noticed by anyone, George took a deep breath and opened the door of the shop.

He heard the tinging of a bell as he opened the door making him jump slightly. He was a bit disconcerted as he saw shelf upon shelf of bewigged heads covering the walls. A lady was behind the counter brushing a wig and looked up as he walked in.

‘Hello.’ she said smiling in a slightly deep voice, ‘can I help you?’

‘’Erm…yes, I’m George, are you Sharon?’

‘That’s me. Hi George…oh you emailed me, didn’t you; give me a minute and I’ll be with you. Have a look around and see if anything takes your fancy.’

George looked around and wondered at the variety on offer. There were short ones, long ones, straight, curly, wavy, blond, brunette, redhead… so much to choose from…

‘There, that’s done. Sorry about that George. Let me put the ‘closed’ sign up, it’s my half day and as it’s nearly one o’clock I’ll close now, then we’ll have a bit of privacy.

George watched her walk to the door and felt a bit envious. Sharon was thin, tall with a nice figure and passed very well. Her makeup was flawless and she was quite pretty. Only her slight Adams apple and lack of hips gave her away. Anyone who didn’t know the signs wouldn’t have noticed.

‘Okay George, it’s nice to meet you at last, but I can’t call you George when we are trying wigs on. what's your en femme name?

‘I haven’t got one.’

‘Why not?’

‘Well, I know I don’t pass and if I use a girl’s name it’s a bit of a travesty.’

‘So,’ said Sharon frowning slightly, ‘you aren’t a girl then?’

‘Yes…I mean no, I don’t know what I mean. It’s hard to explain. Inside I am a girl, 100 percent but outside I’m this.’ he waived at himself vaguely.

‘Look honey, I get lots of TG people in this shop. I see everyone from the drop dead gorgeous to the not so drop dead gorgeous. I see lots of RG’s too and many of them are not so hot looking. It doesn’t matter what you look like, at the end of the day it’s how you are inside that counts. Not everyone looks like a film star or a model, only a few. No one is perfect.’

‘I suppose you’re right though it’s hard looking like I do.’

‘Don’t keep putting yourself down like that! Look let’s have a cup of tea in the back and we’ll have a girly chat, okay?’

George smiled at this positive and uplifting girl and just nodded.

~*~

Mike Robison was tired. He had been working his cab for 12 straight hours. He hated the job, but it was the only work available. It didn’t pay very well, but that was life; at least it paid the bills. He drank his fifth strong coffee of the day, yawning as he realised that he still had two more hours to work before he could call it a day. Leaving Mo’s café, he went over to his car and got in. Starting the engine with some difficulty, he kind of ignored the black stuff coming out of the exhaust. What can you expect after two hundred thousand miles on the clock and not enough money coming in for proper servicing?

The radio scratched into life.

‘Mike, are you there?’

He picked up the handset.

‘Yes, Tracy.’

‘Got a job for you; Heathrow…pick up Mr James 15 Harling Street…know it?’

Dave yawned, nearly breaking his jaw.

‘Okay; when does he want picking up?’

‘Yesterday.’

‘Ha…ha, very funny. Tell him I’ll be there in ten minutes.’

‘Will do.’

There was a click and the radio went dead.

Mike pulled out into the traffic, getting a blast from the horn of a lorry that had to brake for him. He waived apologetically and made his way to Harling Street.

~*~

George and Sharon sat and sipped their tea.

‘So George, if you were born a girl, what would you have liked to be named as?’

George looked embarrassed.

‘What?’

‘Well, you’ll laugh.’

‘No I won’t.’

‘Catherine.’

‘What's wrong with that, it’s a lovely name?’

‘It’s a bit old fashioned.’

‘So what, it’s a nice name and anyway classic names like that never really go out of fashion.’

‘I suppose so.’ he replied, less than convinced.

‘Look,’ laughed Sharon, ‘you need to get into the female mindset when you are dressed as one, otherwise, why do you bother dressing or buying wigs?’

George sighed.

‘I know. It’s just that I have a low opinion of myself and if I don’t look the part, I don’t feel that I have the right to call myself Catherine.’

‘It looks like you need bolstering up a bit. Look, I have plenty of girly clothes here. Some of my customers like to dress properly so that they can see the real effect of the wigs they try on. Would you like to put on a few things? I’ll do your makeup if you aren’t too sure of yourself and the worse that will happen is that you will see if the wigs suit you; the best is that you will see yourself to the best advantage and might even start using Catherine instead of George when you are dressed. Will you try it for me?’

‘Have you got time?’

‘I always have time for a girl in need!’

~*~

After dropping the gentleman off at the airport, Mike made his way back to the office. He had about enough of today but he thought that he had better get at least one more job in before calling it a day. The car definitely needed sorting out as he found it hard to start last time and the bangs squeaks and rattles were getting worse. A1 Cars weren’t that fussy about the cars, but it was due for Council inspection next month and if it didn’t pass, he would be off the road.

Mike felt another wave of tiredness wash over him and he pulled into the services to take a quick coffee break. For the thousandth time, he wondered if he could find something else he could do for a living, but there wasn’t anything…

~*~

George looked at himself in the mirror and opened his mouth in surprise. He really did look quite nice. Not beautiful, but nice in a sort of homely, almost glamorous granny type of way. The dress was simple knee length and blue. It was cotton and had cap sleeves. The dress was lined and felt quite silky against his body. The bra felt restrictive but nice and the false breasts were just the right size for his frame. Over his silky panties, he was wearing some flesh coloured tights that made his legs look quite shapely. However, it was his face that he was noticing the most. The foundation had hidden the flaws and had given Sharon a reasonably blank canvas where she could weave her magic.
Georges face looked smooth and relatively wrinkle free. The mascara on his eyelashes made them look full and long. The black eyeliner and two tones of blue shadow made his eyes look big and somehow vulnerable. After the removal of a few wayward eyebrow hairs and the application of the black pencil, his eyebrows looked nice and quite feminine. The pink blush on his cheeks gave him colour normally lacking in his somewhat pasty looking face. Finally his lips looked fuller and lovelier after Sharon had first used a lip liner on the outside of his lips and then filled them in with some pink lip gloss that felt and looked wonderful.
Sharon had found him a light brown wig that was shoulder length, straight with a fringe that shaped his face. The over look was breathtaking to someone who had struggled all his life to look on the outside what he felt on the inside.

‘You like, Catherine?’

‘Yes,’ she whispered.

‘And are you George or Catherine dressed and looking like that?’

‘C…Catherine.’

‘Good girl. You see, you can be Catherine if you really try.’

Catherine nodded. It was strange thing; for so many years she had danced around the problem; making excuses and not doing anything about it. Looking at herself now, she could see that she could be closer to her dream, to live as a woman. Alright, she still wasn’t a Marilyn Monroe look alike, but dressed in the right clothes and wig and with makeup properly applied, she would just about pass and she would be satisfied with that.

With tears in her eyes, she tore herself away from the mirror and hugged the smiling Sharon.

‘Thank you so much!’ she cried.

‘Now don’t you go crying, you’ll wreck your makeup!’

~*~

‘Mike, are you there?’

‘Hello Tracy.’

‘You sound tired love.’

‘Yea, I’ll be glad when this shift is over.’

‘Well, you be careful. Are you sure you want this one?’

‘What’s the job?’

Lady…a Mrs Jones, wants picking up from the shopping centre and taken home to 22 Spencer Drive.’

‘Well, at least it’s a quick one. Tell her I’ll be there in ten minutes. After this one, I’m off call.’

‘Okay Mike. See you later.’

‘Bye.’

Mike started the car…eventually and clattered towards his final job of the day…

~*~

Catherine and Sharon spent a nice afternoon together. Catherine tried on several different outfits and most of the wigs in the shop. Sharon tried different makeup looks on her until they both agreed that they had found what suited her the best.

It was a wonderful afternoon for Catherine. At last she had found relative peace with herself and a new friend! She decided that she would find out what she could do to go full time as Catherine and she was looking forward to having a happier future than she had experienced in her past. All her life she wanted to look as well as feel like a girl and Sharon had shown her the way. She had gone into the shop feeling negative and left the shop with several bags, a more positive view on her life and a new friend.

Rome wasn’t built in a day, so had Catherine changed back into George before leaving and after a quick hug from Sharon, he left the shop promising to come back very soon.

As he walked down the road, he marvelled at what a difference an afternoon could make. George was happy to be male for a little while longer. He needed to see some people who would help him change into her. He was still a bit uncomfortable referring himself as her, but knew, when the time came, George would be a thing of the past and Catherine would immerge as the butterfly, a somewhat elderly butterfly but still…

~*~

Mike turned into the high street, the car was sounding noisier than ever. The lady in the back wouldn’t stop complaining about the smell of oil. He decided that he would put on a CD and grabbed one from the seat beside him. At least it would drown out the engine noise and the stupid bat in the back…

~*~

George came up to the pedestrian lights and waited until they turned red. He smiled as he saw the mother and toddler walking in front of him as they crossed the road; they looked happy and the little girl was skipping and singing while Mum was trying to keep hold of the wriggling child and carry two carrier bags at the same time…Then he heard the sound of a noisy car coming from the left…

~*~

Mike tried to put the CD in the player, but he missed the hole and damn thing fell down between his legs…He leaned forward and briefly took his eyes off the road as he tried to pick up the CD from the floor by the peddles…

~*~

George saw that the car was coming closer and it appeared to be speeding up slightly. The mother and child in front hadn’t seen it and were continuing to cross the road, more interested in themselves than paying attention to what was going on around them. The car wasn’t going to stop!

Without thinking, George dropped his bags and ran forward, shouting for the woman to watch out. The mother and child just stopped and looked back, startled at his voice. He pushed them both strongly and could hear them screaming as they were bundled out of the way in the nick of time…

~*~

Mike looked up as the lady in the back started shouting at him. He saw in the briefest of seconds that he was virtually on top of a pedestrian crossing. The lights were red and there were people crossing the road…He slammed on the brakes and nothing happened; the brakes wouldn’t work! It was like slow motion as he saw a large man push a lady and little girl out of the way and then try to avoid his speeding car…

~*~

George looked up and saw looked into the face of the man driving the car. He knew then that it was too late…He felt a big explosion in his side and then blinding pain in the head …then it went dark…

~*~

Mike saw the man’s face and the look he gave him… a look of sheer terror as his car ploughed into the man’s soft body, sending him flying in the air with a sickening finality…

~*~
George felt no pain as he looked down from above at the scene of carnage. He knew that he was looking at his own body as it lay on the ground with an ever widening pool of red blood seeping out of him. He looked over at the kerb and the hysterical woman and child as they were being comforted by some people. The driver had gotten out of the car and was weeping uncontrollably by the side of his dented car.

Someone thankfully covered his body up and George was thankful for this.

George looked behind him and saw something wonderful. It was a white tunnel and at the end of the tunnel was a bright light. Somehow, George knew that he had to go toward the light and so he moved in that direction without much conscious thought. He had a warm feeling and he felt calm and not frightened at all. As he drifted slowly toward the light, George reflected on his life. He had not done much with it and in the end it wasn’t a very happy life apart from the wonderful few hours that he had spent as Catherine with Sharon. He was so happy that he was able to save the life of the mother and child though; it kind of made his life all the more worthwhile.

As he came closer to the wonderfully warm bright light, he saw a vague shape standing there. Then he saw behind the shape that were some huge golden gates and they were closed. He wondered if that meant that he wasn’t allowed in, but it was momentary as this was a place of goodness and peace, perhaps they would open when he finally got there.

A few moments later the shape was clearer. It was a wonderfully beautiful women dressed in long white robes. Her hair was like spun gold and was long and luxuriant. She was looking at George and smiling.

‘Hello George.’

‘Wh…where am I?’

He noticed that his voice sounded strange, high pitched and somehow…

‘Where do you think you are?’

‘Is it heaven?’

‘Yes.’

‘Are you an Angel?’

‘I suppose I am,’ laughed the lady.

‘I didn’t go to church much, I’m sorry.’

The lady laughed gently and sweetly.

‘Oh George, it doesn’t matter whether you went to church or not or even which religion you practiced. What matters is how you lived and conducted your life. You are a good person and you sacrificed your life for others, that is enough.’

‘Does that mean that I can go into heaven?’

‘You will go to heaven, but not now.’

‘I don’t understand.’

‘You see the gates behind you?’

‘Yes.’

‘When you are ready to come through them, we will welcome you with open arms, but now is not the time.’

‘I don’t understand!’

‘Look at yourself.’

A large mirror appeared in front of George and he could see the diaphanous form of a lovely girl. She was tall and beautiful with long flowing blond hair. She was dressed in a similar fashion to the Angel.

‘Who is thi…’ George stopped as it was clear that it was he or rather she speaking and she notice that her voice was not that of a man but of a girl.

Yes, all your life, you have thought that you were a girl trapped in a male body and you were right. The reason why you were born as a boy was that you would be there at the right moment to save that young mother and her child. You have fulfilled that task and now it is time for your reward.

‘Could I have not saved them as a woman?’

‘Possibly, but chance can sometimes take a hand and this was a way to ensure that the right thing happened.’

‘But other people die all the time, why were they to be saved?’

Because it was not their time yet, just as it isn’t yours.’

‘I don’t understand what all this means.’

The Angel looked kindly at George.

‘There are some things in Heaven and Earth that you need to trust on faith.’

‘W…what happens now?’

‘Well, you have choice. Although I said you are not ready for Heaven yet, you do have a choice. The gates will open and let you pass in, if you do so desire. But, you can return from whence you came and live the life you should have had… if that is what you really want. Do you wish this?’

George thought for a moment. He never had a chance in his previous life; perhaps, somehow things might be better if he had another chance.

‘Can I go back?’

‘Yes dear, if that is what you truly want and when your life finally ends, I will be here to welcome you. One thing though, you will remember nothing of this or your previous life. It will be a fresh start. Are you willing to lose all your memories?’

George just nodded as after all what had he to lose?

~*~

Exactly eleven months and two days later, Catherine Baines was born on Christmas Day. She was a pretty child and loved by all her family. She led a long and happy life and had four children..the first of which was called Sophie. She had sixteen grand children and no less than thirty seven great grand children in her extended family and she was loved by all of them. She led a long and happy life and went to her maker with a smile on her face and no regrets.

Fin

Please leave comments if you have the time...