Not What We Expected by Tiffany B. Quinn As the wedding plans and my girl training ground on, I kept in touch with my lawyer. One afternoon at the end of April she called me to let me know that we had a court date set in mid-May. I let Sandra know about our upcoming court appearance when she got home from work. She broke her date with Tom that night and the two of us stayed home together and ignored the phones. We pulled out our photo albums and spent the evening reminiscing. That evening we laughed a lot and cried a lot as we talked about the good times that we had shared. It was a double chocolate ice cream kind of evening. We consumed more than was healthy. I learned that chocolate ice cream is surprisingly therapeutic.

Chapter 11

"That seems to be a lot for a weekend," I observed as Sandra rolled a large suitcase to the entry of our condo.

She just shrugged, "I don't really know what I'll need. You'll be doing the same thing as you embrace your femininity. A girl has to be prepared for anything. Unlike guys, who only need one or two changes to be prepared for just about any occasion."

It was a Friday in mid-May and the day of the hearing on our dissolution. I also had a hearing on my petition for a name and gender change. Our plan was to drive together to the Courthouse in my car. After the hearing, Tom was going to whisk Sandra away on a corporate jet to meet his parents and extended family in Louisiana. Tom didn’t actually own his own jet but he did subscribe to a corporate jet plan, kind of like a time-share condo. He was entitled to so many "free" trips a year, if you call the exorbitant annual dues free.

With the wedding only a month away, Tom's family was annoyed that they had not met his fiancé face-to-face. Tom and Sandra thought it best to wait until after the dissolution was final before taking her to meet the clan. Tom’s family knew that Sandra was in the midst of a divorce and that she didn’t want to meet the family until she was a single woman again. They could, grudgingly, accept the excuse.

Of course, Tom had already been vetted by Sandra's family as they all live in the area. Sandra told me that the first meeting of Tom with her family had been very tense. Her family hadn’t yet come to grips with my exit from their family circle. I had been a well-loved member of Sandra's family and no one was particularly happy that Sandra had found a new man. At that point they still needed to be convinced that I wasn't being dumped for a better offer. It took time, and some input from me, before her family started to take Tom into their hearts as they had done with me. This was expected. Sandra and I knew that, given the way things had transpired, it would be a while before Sandra's family was entirely comfortable with Sandra's new husband. Being the basically good guy that he is, Tom did eventually win them over. I was pleased, however, that I was so well thought of by my soon-to-be ex in-laws.

Before she left, Sandra and I had talked a lot about her first trip to Louisiana to meet Tom's family. To say that she had been nervous is an understatement. Tom's father was a civil court judge and his mother was a lawyer that specializes in family law. Tom is their youngest child and had been the only one unmarried at the time. His siblings had several children each, with the oldest few of Tom's nieces and nephews being about the same as my apparent age. While he was the richest sibling, his brother and sister were no slouches in the money-making department either. They were an intimidating group.

Sandra had been on the phone a lot with her future mother-in-law as the wedding planning had progressed but had avoided giving her the specifics of how she and Tom came to be a couple. That would all come to a head that weekend. And she was scared to death about meeting the family for the first time.

"Nice outfit," I observed as she grabbed a bagel and orange juice out of the small kitchen.

"You don't think it's too much?" She nervously asked. We must have spent two hours last night pulling outfits out of her closet and debating the pros and cons of each. She finally decided on a conservative skirt suit that would be appropriate for both the hearing and the introduction to Tom's family. We even debated what lingerie she should wear. I suggested that she probably didn't want to feel too sexy when meeting the Judge and Tom's family, so she went with something plain and conservative. She would save the sexy stuff for the honeymoon.

She was also wore her wedding ring necklace. She hadn't said anything, but I knew that the necklace would be replaced before she landed in Louisiana.

I also wore my wedding band necklace to court. I did retire it to occasional use after the dissolution was final, but I waited a few days to do it. I have left it hanging in open sight in my room all the years since as a reminder of the good times that Sandra and I had once had. I also hung my friendship necklace with it to remind me of the wonderful experiences that Sandra and I had had and would have in the future. Both necklaces have been worn fairly frequently.

"We've been over this," I reminded her. "You look great, girlfriend."

She comes over and fluffs my hair a little and said, "And so do you little girl."

We also debated my outfit last night. What does a twelve-year-old girl wear to court when she is splitting up with her wife? I don't think that there is a standard protocol for that. We decided that I needed to wear something that left no doubt that I am no longer husband material, as if my apparent age and gender are not enough. I wore a cute knee length dress with cap sleeves and an empire waist that emphasized my small breasts. My body had stabilized at a height of 5' 2" and a skinny 90 lbs and I don’t appear to be regressing in age any longer. My A cup breasts eliminated any remaining doubt that I was now female. My hair had grown out some, but still didn't quite reach my shoulders. Sandra had shown me how to use a curling iron and I had spent time on it that morning making sure that it looked as feminine as possible. Sandra had me put a barrette with a bow in my hair. I had also painted my finger and toenails to match my outfit and was wearing open toe sandals with a small heel. At the end of April, Sandra had talked me into getting my ears pierced so my still healing ears also sported a cute set of small half carat princess-cut diamond studs set in platinum, a gift from Tom. The man likes diamonds.

Sandra said that I looked too cute for words. Looking in the mirror, I agreed with her.

Standing in front of a full length mirror the night before it occurred to me that we did look like mother and daughter. We had the same color hair and many of the same physical features.

After a couple of months of practice, I was getting pretty good at braiding hair, though I still had a way to go before being considered an expert. I would frequently practice on Sandra's mid-back length hair during our girl lessons. While we were waiting to leave for the hearing, I had her sit down and I braided a fishtail French braid for her. It added another layer of sophistication to her look.

I remember thinking, while I was braiding her mid-back length hair, that I could hardly wait until mine is long enough for braids. It would be another year before my hair was long enough to do some fun stuff with. It eventually grew out to be as long as Sandra's and I love all the hairstyles that I can now put it in.

Eventually it was time to go and we wrestled her suitcase into Butterfly, my Honda car. We had a melancholy discussion about some of the good times we'd had over the years as she drove us to the Courthouse. She apologized to me several times for being at fault for the end of our marriage. I tried to reassure her that it wasn’t her fault, but my assurances fell on deaf ears. I know that both of us were sad that we had been forced into our current situation, but Sandra was also happy about the new love in her life. She still had some guilt issues about how she had come to be in love with Tom but her new love carried her past it.

We met Tom at the Courthouse parking garage and he effortlessly transferred her bag to his Lexus, muttering something about too much stuff for a weekend. Sandra glared at him. Tom still had a lot to learn about women.

I noticed that he only had a small gym bag for his stuff tossed in the trunk of his car.

Outside the assigned court room, we met with my lawyer and doctor who had both come to reassure the Judge that this was a real situation.

There were several other couples on the docket. They all looked like they are going to do great harm to each other as their lawyers kept them apart. It seemed obvious to me that our case would be the easiest one for the judge to solve that day.

The Judge must have thought so too, as we were the first case that he called forward after everyone was settled in the courtroom.

"Where's the husband?" he asked as we all approached the bench.

I raised my hand and give him a little girly wave. "Here, Your Honor."

He stared at me for a moment. "I've read the petition, but I still can't wrap my head around this. Please prove to me that you're not playing a joke on the court."

At this point, my lawyer stepped forward and set out my medical history before the Judge. In it was a series of photos taken every week over the past seven months that I've been seeing my doctor.

"Your Honor, these images demonstrate the husband's transformation over the last six and a half months," my lawyer explained as the Judge studied the pictures. "As you can see, he starts out as a healthy male and ends up as the girl that you see standing before you. Blood tests at the start of this process show Andy as having typical male XY chromosomes. Blood tests taken two months ago, when the petition was filed, show that Andi now has typical female XX chromosomes. In between there was an interesting mix of chromosome pairs, the like of which have never been documented by medical science that we know of. Over the course of the transition period, Andy lost weight and height and started to display typical female sex characteristics, including the loss of male genitalia, by natural means and not surgery, the formation of incomplete female genitalia, the development of female breasts, rearrangement of skeletal structure, redistribution of fat, and loss of facial and body hair. Andi's gynecologist tells me that her internal organs are currently in a state of flux and that it is expected that, if the transformation continues on its current trajectory, that Andi will soon have all the organs and functions of a naturally born genetic female. This has all happened by natural means that have yet to be explained. The only hormone therapy occurred early in this process as an attempt to stop the changes. The therapy was ineffective. Andi has experienced age regression in addition to spontaneous gender change, now having the physical body typical of a twelve-year-old female. As a result of these changes, Andy can no longer fill his/her role as the husband that Sandra married. The situation has forced the couple to jointly request a legal dissolution of their marriage commitment and they have agreed to the attached disposition of assets. There is no fault finding in this case and the applicants will remain the best of friends, but not as husband and wife."

"Doctor," the Judge asked my physician, "convince me that this is not a hoax."

"Your Honor," she began, "Andy came to me six and a half months ago with unusual symptoms and I have met with him/her every week since. It has been a most intriguing case and I have involved the services of a number of specialists in the search for a cause. We know of no scientific basis for these changes. We also recently ran DNA tests on hair samples from a year ago and from a month ago and found a very strong agreement in the results. They are an almost exact match. Her lawyer has also had her current fingerprints compared to those taken several years ago when he was first employed at the University. Aside from the size, the patterns are precisely the same on all fingers. You will find the prints and analysis in my report."

"Young lady," he addressed me, "is all this true?"

"Yes, Your Honor." I replied with confidence.

He looked at me as he was pondering the evidence.

"Tell me about your employment and ability to support yourself if this becomes final." He directed.

"I was let go by my employer two months ago as a budget cutting measure and the fact that I could no longer do the work assigned," I began, "but what they really meant is that my work was excellent but our clients did not want to work with me based on perceptions of my age. I was no longer useful to them. They did provide me with three months’ severance pay and health benefits, which run out in a month. I have been looking for work, but there's not much out there for a twelve-year-old IT technician. I am worried about my ability to support myself. In the interim both my wife and parents have offered me shelter and support until we can resolve the problem."

Looking at Sandra, he continued, "I have reviewed the proposed division of assets and see that it is heavily weighted in your husband's favor. Why is that?"

"I am currently in a position that provides me with great financial security and the potential for a substantial income in the future." She responded, "I want to help Andi to be in the best possible position to move forward in her life. I can recover much better from this dissolution that she currently can."

"Why aren’t you agreeing to pay alimony?" the Judge asked.

"She offered to, Your Honor," I answered in Sandra's behalf, "but I refused it. I want us both to be unfettered by continuing commitments."

"That’s noble of you, young lady," the Judge noted, "Are you sure about that? I don’t want you to come back to the court after changing your mind."

"I am sure, Your Honor," I replied.

"Why do you want this dissolution?" He asked Sandra.

With tears in her eyes, she replied, "I love Andi, and never wanted these changes to happen. If he hadn’t transformed into a young girl, we wouldn’t be here. Unfortunately, the changes have taken place and neither of us can see how we can remain married. She is no longer the man that I married. We both agree that our marriage is effectively over and that this is the right thing to do. What we do still have is a strong friendship. We will be best girlfriends for life."

"I still can't wrap my head around this," the Judge said, "but the facts seem clear that Andy can no longer function in the role that the marriage was originally founded on, through processes unknown and outside his, err, her control. The distribution of assets seems very lopsided to me and I think that Sandra should be paying alimony, but both parties are in agreement that this is what is in their best interests. Having not heard any objections to the petition, I grant the petition for dissolution. From this moment onward, you two are no longer married. May you each find happiness."

With that pronouncement, our marriage officially ended.

Sandra and I hugged and we both shed a few silent tears. She whispered that she still loved me, then left the courtroom hand-in-hand with Tom.

The Judge then picked up the petition for my name and gender change and commented, "I take it that, given our discussions here today, that I need to grant your petition for a name change and decree that you are now genetically female in the eyes of the Law as well as in the eyes of Science."

"Yes, please, Your Honor" I replied.

With that, in addition to being newly single, I legally became Andrea Marie, female.

I had copies of the finalized court decrees in hand before lunch time.

With the dissolution finalized, Sandra was free to pursue her marriage to Tom. At the time, I didn't know where my future would lead me. I did know that I would need to talk to someone after the courtroom experience, so I had scheduled an appointment with my psychologist for right after lunch. She had blocked out an hour and a half for me and I needed every minute of it.

Feeling a little better about the events of the day after talking to the psychologist, I headed to the DMV with the new court approved name change decree in hand to change the name on my driver’s license.

By late afternoon I found myself sitting at my parent’s breakfast table filling in the final blanks on applications to change my various records. I attached copies of the court decrees and the affidavit from my doctor. The applications were ready to go in the mail before my parents arrived home from work. To keep myself busy, if for no other reason, I took the time to fix a nice dinner for my parents. I really did not want to be home alone in the condo where Sandra and I had spent so much time together. I ended up staying the weekend in my childhood home.

A few weeks later I received my new birth certificate. It was a bittersweet experience. The date hadn't changed, just the gender and name. Other changed documents were also trickling in.

The legal process had run its course, and, by the coloring of the crystal, my physical changes would soon be completed.