Previously

Well I started to follow all of Grandma’s requests, but I was seriously ticked and would really give her what for. It wasn’t just the acrylics, she was stacking the pile in the ‘choose Tegan’ column, and that was not right. I had my nighty in one hand as I barged into the bathroom in just my knickers.

“Tegan why aren’t you wearing your nighty?”

“Grandma you gave me tits!” I yelled.

“Tegan, don’t be vulgar, and I assure you that when I first met you in the salon you already were as you stand before me now. In addition to not being responsible for your womanly upper curves, I also didn’t give you hips, shrink your waist and height, nor give you long hair that is nearly a foot down your back. I’ll explain as we remove your make-up.” I placed my nighty on the side of the tub then sat down beside it as Grandma used some cream and a cotton ball and proceeded to gently rub my face.

“Did you really think if you were just Thomas in a skirt and blouse with make-up and a hair cut that I would have been as startled as I was when I first saw you? I can assure you that aside containing the once more than twice you had left gaping wide open, the only other magic I cast was to shrink Melisa’s skirt to fit you because even if I’d tightened the belt it would have bunched up badly, and if I did nothing then the skirt might have fallen down to your ankles.” Grandma took a moment to sigh and looked sadly at her new granddaughter.

“Tegan, when I entered the salon I saw a set of identical twins stood either side of their Mum. I knew you weren’t Helen or Thomas, its why I looked to the rest of the salon even when Doris said that it wasn’t Helen but my other Granddaughter Tegan, and I wondered if Thomas might be pulling a prank. Until you called me Grandma, and the whole ‘I used to be a Tom, boy’ I had dismissed you as not Thomas.”

“Why would I end up looking like Anne Marie?”

“Well that’s due to three, let’s call them, individuals. Tegan, on the Saturday evening you arrived from your Uncle's in November last year I said I knew you were tricking bartenders into serving you beers, and though I disapproved, I asked for three things. What were those three things?”

“Don’t hurt or damage anyone or anything, don’t encourage others to drink, and don’t drink at the Red Lion Pub.” I said with my head hung in guilt. In my haste to try to chat the girls into drinking at a pub I’d offered the first pub I saw and forgot that I wasn’t supposed to drink at that one. Grandma never gave me a reason and it’s not like I didn’t have plenty of other pubs to use, so I’d pretty much forgotten about it.

“Did you break any of those rules I gave you?”

“The last two.”

“I can make an argument for the first one too, Tegan. As not damaging anyone, includes not hurting yourself. Whether, you or the Peddler are most to blame in causing you to be standing before me as you do, is something that could be debated, but Anne Marie was the least at fault of the three of you. She merely provided the seed of an idea and an opening that the Peddler could use to change you.”

Grandma sighed, threw away the current dirty cotton ball and looked into my eyes with pain and pity. “My grandson, Thomas, whom I’ve constantly berated about the dangers of lies. Whom I tried teaching of paying attention when certain words are spoken or thought for they are a warning that something is open and must be contained. If Thomas listened to me on at least one of my warnings, then the Peddler wouldn’t have been able to do what’s been done.”

“Who’s the Peddler?” I frantically tried to think if I’d seen some shifty character trying to sell stuff that had fallen off the back of a lorry. My next thought was for a shady cloaked character on a bike with a basket for his wares to peddle.

“Tegan, you laughed as if it was a joke when Anne Marie pointed out the sign of the Red Lion Pub, that due to missing and partial letters. It reads as ‘The Ped l or’, she even said the pub’s true name.”

“The land lord of the Red Lion Pub is a peddler?”

“The Peddler is more a force than a person and the Land Lord has agreements with the Peddler. One is to not fix the sign. So all can be aware they are operating within the Peddler’s bailiwick. If I had chosen the other path in the salon to change you back into Thomas, one of the costs to pay is that both you and I would each owe the Peddler favors it would count as once more than twice. Which of course is a trap to the unwary to owe favors for the rest of eternity, and you can be sure that a force of chaos will be stacking the deck against containment.”

“Witchraft is a force of order?”

“Balance Tegan, but we are getting way off base and have more important things to discuss. Firstly, as I’ve removed your make-up look in the mirror and accept that you are Tegan, not Thomas. It is vital you accept who you are, but more of whom you are descended. Remember my husband, your Grandfather, Leslie, his Mother, Tegan and your Dad, Allan. All of whom, you, Tegan Allana Lesley Wehl, are named after.” Grandma then left me in the bathroom.

I stared, and I’ll blame this body for the leaking waterworks because aside the hair colour, my male bits and a cup smaller pair of boobs, I was looking at the Anne Marie I’d met before the fateful beers, even without a bit of clothing aside my knickers or any make-up on. I now understood what Grandma was meaning when she had said Thomas was gone. I may have male genitals but this body was, aside that, female. Further, unlike my sister, I didn’t see my parents or grandparents in my face. I didn’t see a female version of myself.

Washing and drying my face I slipped the nighty on and headed for the bedroom. I found my Grandma waiting for me. “Pop into bed, Tegan, I’ll fix your hair for the night. Now, Tegan Allana Lesley Wehl, can you tell me your full name?”

“Tegan Allana Lesley Wehl?” What was my Grandma asking?

“Be surer of your name, Tegan. It is yours, own it. Now write it again and again on this. Think of each of the people you are named after and how you are related to them.” She handed me an ordinary note book and pen. It had my full name written once at the top of the first page. Then nothing but blank lines.

“What am I doing?”

“Becoming familiar with your name, enforcing it as yours. Solidifying and stabilizing who you are so it can’t be ripped from you. Now keep writing while I talk. I’ve set your alarm for four thirty…

“Four thirty, why so early you said the shop opens at seven?”

“You’ve got more to do in the morning now, before we can leave.”

“Grandma if the Peddler was causing me to turn into Anne Marie why do I have…

I blushed, as I realized that I didn’t want to call out my male stuff.

“You also still have your strong slate blue eyes not the bright light blue ones that Anne Marie has. Your changes are skin deep only, and your hair will grow the same colour it’s always been. Remember I told you the price for getting now is always a greater cost. When I was telling you off for not honoring your name and relatives. I wasn’t doing it to humiliate you in front of your friends. I was containing the spell before you, were no longer you.”

I now felt disappointed with myself. There I was blaming my Grandma. Getting angry with her and she was stopping me from being more changed than I already was.

“I was adamant I would pay for your hair as you are not Melyonen’s daughter. I reminded you who your Dad was to stop either you losing your Dad or your Dad being changed by the free wild magic you had released. Anne Marie does not have magic, and the Peddler would have got yours when it completed changing you into her twin. Her personality and experiences would have overwritten yours. To all intents you would be dead, and Melyonen would have twins that had the same first fourteen years of life. ”

“If the Peddler gets more from me the more I am changed why would it get me to bleach parts of my hair to get blonde high-lights and Anne Marie to dye parts of hers while we are at it. If it was going to use the salon, why not cause me to bleach all my hair?”

“Does a river run in a straight line to the sea? The Peddler used Anne Marie’s hair appointment to establish a debt from you to Melyonen, to prepare to have you at the genetic level be overwritten to pay for that loan. Why use its magic when treatments at a salon achieve temporarily the same result? Melyonen is not going to pay for her daughter to only get her hair cut and pay for her daughter’s friend to get both a haircut and bleaching.”

“Then why force me to accept acrylic nails from Melyonen?” I asked worried I owed a debt now.

“Because I negotiated the terms and the Peddler was not involved in the transaction. It actually enabled me to completely stop the Peddler’s deal from going forward anymore, containing the wild magic you had let loose. I included it being listed as offered as a gift. Which instantly decreased what could be owed. She gave the gift to celebrate your first step from girl into womanhood and to be Anne Marie’s friend. To be a word of caution to tame her rather wild child to tread on less dangerous paths. Remember, how she said a true friend would also do what she enabled her friend to do? Melyonen, would not have been upset if you said no to the acrylics, she was willing to use you to deny her daughter. For her, whether you said yes or no, she won.” Before I got bent out of shape of being used I recalled Grandma’s words on selfless people. My Grandmother would count Melyonen’s willingness to use me, as a positive character attribute.

“You will have to use Melisa’s clothes tomorrow when we buy you your own. I will also buy new packs of underwear for both girls, and a silk blouse for Melisa so that we give them back more than the clothes you borrowed. Why do you think it is a good idea to give them back extra clothes, Tegan?”

“Is it to ensure I don’t have a debt to both girls for wearing their clothes and using their make-up?”

Grandma nodded smiled and got up from my bed picking up the notebook and taking the pen from my hand. “Have a good night’s sleep, Tegan. She flicked the light switch as she left the room and closed the door to.

After the day I’d had, sleep was determined to elude me. I analyzed everything my Grandma said looking for any fault or discrepancy against what I recall happening. Trying to see if I could find anything that could solve or prove that it wasn’t my own fault as Grandma heavily implied. I mean even if she managed to smooth things out with the school there would still be issues like would anyone twig that the day Thomas leaves school a relative that’s female just happens to show up and start. Also, rarely does one change school for the second half of summer term. In a bit over four weeks its final exams for the year’s course work.

Then there was tennis, gymnastics or athletics that girls had to choose two of. How could I shower and get changed in the girls’ locker rooms? At night I would be expected to sleep in the girls’ dorms which would raise the same issues. It’s all well and good Grandma saying that though Thomas would get teased or beaten while Tegan would not, but he still had enough to be found out as a boy and couldn’t stop worrying. Then there was the typical boy attitude toward pretty girls. Some of the boys in our school were too aggressive in their pursuit of girls. I feared their interest in me could also cause me to be discovered, if I ever slipped up and relaxed just because I wasn’t in a changing room or the girls dorm at the time. No I couldn’t relax anywhere, anytime.

I finally got myself to sleep and wished I hadn’t succeeded. I found myself a prisoner within my own body. I could see and feel what Tegan did, but I wasn’t in control. The dream took off from Doris returning after the phone call to announce Tegan didn’t have to be squeezed in as her customer had rescheduled and Anne Marie and Tegan were now her last customers for the day. ‘Wait that meant Grandma wouldn’t be there to stop the wild magic!’

I wanted to get my wallet out of the Debenhams bag to pay the bill, but I had no control of myself. Tegan was increasingly behaving like a girl, and her thoughts of what she wanted to do, and wear made be uncomfortable and queasy. My mouth opened but I could form no words to interrupt Melyonen and Doris’s imminent transaction of paying for the hair do. That would seal the loan; cause my debt to magic to be due…

Thankfully the alarm seeded control of my body back to me. I refused to not be in control of my life. The few hours while asleep were bad enough, and at least I know the things I dreamt did not happen. Grandma was knocking on the door and bringing a cup of tea as I was stretching and sitting up having turned off my alarm.

“Quickly drink your tea and then use the bathroom. Try not to get your hair wet. Your skirt and blouse are hung up in the wardrobe, you’ll have to use the same bra, but I’ve got you a clean pair of panties here.” Grandma placed the bra I wore yesterday with a matching pair of pink panties on the other side of the queen bed. I was a bit concerned as they were not only skimpier than the pair I wore, but also briefer than the pair Melisa wore yesterday. That little bit of material would be all I had under my skirt protecting me from being seen.

Adroitly cleaning teeth after breakfast, I was looking forward to the next task. As it wasn’t yet five thirty, I had ninety minutes to study the book. Grandma had planned to spend up to an hour teaching me how to apply my own make-up, and the balance on the book, but agreed that I had the choice to not wear make-up and spend the whole time on the book. After my horrible nightmares last night having that one victory was huge.

“What do you see, Tegan?”

I’d been all psyched up. I was expecting as I now knew the title to read it aloud and get started opening the book and learning magic for ninety odd minutes. Well I was positive I knew the title but I still saw the second letter as an ‘o’. Except knowing that seeing it as an ‘o’ being wrong and positive that I knew the title I was at the exact same point I left off yesterday evening.

“You still se the ‘o’?” Grandma calmly asked.

“I know it’s wrong though but can’t force it to be an ‘a’ I let her know my frustration.”

“Don’t try to force it, and at least you know more than yesterday. You have improved. Progress is still occurring. I am glad you don’t have all three words. I prefer you to steadily learn, and though you think this is slow you are doing so much faster than I did.

Even knowing what the title was it wasted thirty five of my ninety minutes to get the three words to show up. My other problem, aside the lost time was though the three words were there finally visible I knew something was wrong with the title. I threw the book down in frustration.

“Tegan, what’s wrong now? I thought you understood it would take time even to see what you expect to be there.”

“I can see all three words, but they’re wrong. I was so sure it was right. That I’d found the title. I wasted all my time trying to see what I thought the title should be and likely forced it to display what I wanted rather than what it is.”

“Tegan if I said, ‘You are wearing a black belt,’ would that statement be the truth?”

I looked at my belt and back to Grandma. “Yes.”

“But, Tegan it isn’t the truth. A statement that is closer to the truth but still is not the truth would be to say ‘You are wearing a thin plastic black belt with black cotton stitching, punched holes and a buckle made from a mixed alloy of metals,’ it still would not be the truth but it is truer than the first.”

“What’s that got to do… There’s more than three words to the title of the book.”

“Bravo, Tegan, bravo.”