No-Hoper to Knocked Up
Copyright 2014 Natasha Koshkov
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1: Ungrateful Child

Jerry threw his controller against the wall with all the force he could muster. It rebounded with a loud thud. Unbelievable, he’d been sniped by the same stupid kid three times in a row. There was no way his opponent wasn’t cheating. He should report him for using bots. The childish laughter ringing down TeamSpeak made it a million times worse.

“You fucking cheater!” Jerry yelled, “I’m going to track down your IP, come and fucking smash your face in!”

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” came the tinny voice down the line, “I beat you loser. Go back to your mum’s basement.”

The channel went dead. Jerry, despite his hatred of the stereotype, did in fact live in his mum’s basement. It was just a stopgap measure while he found a job. It had been a stopgap measure ever since he dropped out of college four years ago. There hadn’t been much progress on finding a job in that time. He hadn’t had much luck finding a girlfriend or friends either – things that he cared about only marginally more than employment.

Life wasn’t terrible though. He had the luxury of playing videogames all day and well into the night and when he started getting down a few ounces of bud always lifted his spirits. The only obstacle to his happiness was his mother’s constant nagging. She couldn’t just leave him to his blissfully empty existence in the basement – she always wanted him to go out and do things, meet new people or help her out around the house. It was bad enough when he was a kid, but she should really back off now that he’d grown up. He kicked the game controller out of his way as he climbed the stairs. He had a craving for some potato chips.

Jerry emerged into the well-lit ground floor of the house and crept to the pantry. It was still early enough for his parents to be awake. He’d rather not talk to them, all he ever got was a scolding for his laziness or more nagging about looking for a job and getting out more. He could do without that. The sink was full of dirty pots and pans from their dinner – as always Jerry had declined to eat upstairs and disappeared into his room with the meal.

“Honey, can you help with the dishes?” his mum shouted from the next room over.

“No Mum,” he hollered back.

His mother walked into the kitchen looking as disappointed in her son as ever. Jerry rolled his eyes, he knew the drill.

“Jerry, your father and I would really appreciate if you could help around the house from time to time. We cook, clean and shop for you. I’m not asking much, just make an effort sometimes ok?”

“I don’t ask you to do any of those things! You do them because you want to. You’ve never done anything for me Mum!”

“Honey, let’s discuss this like adults. You’re twenty four, you’re too old for tantrums.”

“It’s true though, you’ve never done anything for me!” he yelled. His mother tried not to get drawn into the shouting match he wanted to start.

“It really hurts to hear you say that. I carried you for nine months, raised you for two decades and it’s hard to watch you refuse to take any responsibility for your life. I just wish you could learn to take care of yourself.” Her voice broke on the final words, tears welling up in her eyes. Jerry saw nothing but another attempt to make him do his mother’s chores for her.

“Fuck you, Mum!” he half-shouted before storming away.

Safely back in his basement room he realised he’d forgotten to grab the chips while he was up there. Not only had he put up with his mum’s nagging, he hadn’t even got anything for it. He was absolutely livid. First that cheating kid camping him online, then his mum bitching him out for not doing her work around the house for her. Un-fucking-believable. This day couldn’t get any worse. He decided to play a few more rounds on his console before he hit the hay. Nothing calmed him down quite like showing those losers online how much they sucked.

2: Is This Real Life?

A deserted town centre, everything was washed out shades of grey. Jerry glanced up and saw lights flickering in the windows of nearby buildings. The night sky was utterly starless. Jerry’s footsteps rang hollow against the black pavement of his dreamscape. He didn’t feel safe here, the buildings across the way looked like they might provide shelter from the growing sense of malevolence he felt radiating from the skies above.

The heavy oak door of the building was unlocked. Jerry stepped inside and the lights along the ceiling burst to life. A young woman was standing in the antechamber. Greenery spilled out from the floor around her, an isolated garden in the belly of this concrete edifice. He eyed her tits, so it was going to be one of those dreams.

“Hi, I’m Jerry,” he said in the suavest tone he could muster. These dreams always went the same way. Any second her panties would drop and they’d get it on.

“You have a lot to learn Jerry.” Her voice sounded as if it was composed by a spring gurgling through rocks. It was eerie in this enclosed space. Once the echo from the walls had died down she spoke again.

“You create nothing. Yet you are fertile ground. Let me plant a seed,” she gurgled as she advanced towards him. Jerry turned only to find a solid wall where the door had once been. He pounded his fists against it but there was no sign that it had ever been anything but solid rock. The mysterious woman’s footsteps were right behind him now. Her arm swung around and forced something deep into his stomach.

“It is planted,” she whispered in her bubbling singsong tone, “be sure it grows well or I shall return for you.”

Jerry turned to find nothing but an empty hall behind him. The woman was gone without a trace. This was a very odd dream. His stomach was starting to hurt like the worst case of gastro he’d ever had. It was distending with the sheer amount of gas he imagined was building up in his belly. Dream logic was weird.

His belly was stretching out further and further. It was hanging over the waistband of his pants. He swung it around and laughed at the way it wobbled. He stopped laughing when he realised it was going to continue growing. Soon it was the size of an exercise ball. His back was hurting and he really, really needed to pee. It’s just a dream, he thought. Jerry grabbed that loose thread of thought and tugged on it. The dream unravelled and his eyes flew open in his dark basement bedroom.

He sat bolt upright and could feel his massive belly resting on his knees as he did. There was nothing he hated more than dreaming of waking up from a dream. He slapped himself in the face in the hope of shocking himself into true wakefulness. All that did was sting his face. The belly on his legs was definitely his, he could feel every movement he made reverberating through the firm fleshy bulge where his flat stomach should be. There was more though, he’d been too distracted by his obvious stomach to notice at first but he felt bloated all over. His fingers came up to his face again, this time with more benign intentions and felt his puffy cheek. He was like that all the way down, his scrawny frame had gained fat all over. Jerry almost fainted when his hand reached his chest. Under his pyjama top were a pair of breasts. Not small ones but massive engorged monstrosities.

Enough was enough. He practically flew out from under his covers to the light switch. It illuminated exactly what his groggy mind had feared. This had to still be a dream. He was a woman and pregnant. Very, very pregnant. In all his two decades on earth he didn’t think he’d ever seen someone with such a massive belly. He wasn’t sure which to freak out about first, the fact that he was a woman or the fact that he was the size of a house. Either way he was panicking.

A high pitched scream escaped him. It sounded so girly. This couldn’t possibly be real. It wasn’t possible for him to go to bed as a man and wake up as a woman. He must be near the due date, oh god, he couldn’t imagine the agony of delivering whatever was growing in his new womb. Anything that big was going to split him in half on the way out.

“This is just a nightmare,” he mumbled under his breath.

Footsteps came rushing down the stairs. Both of his parents had heard the ear splitting screams from the basement and assumed that something horrible must be in progress.

“Jenny, are you all right?” his mum shouted as they stormed into his room.

“I-I’m pregnant,” Jenny stuttered with tear in her eyes.

“Yes, we know hun. It’s ok.”

“I’m scared, mum. How can this be happening?”

“It’s going to be ok,” his dad chimed in, “the hospital said you’re going to have a perfectly healthy set of triplets. We’ll be here to help you out when they come. Don’t you worry.”

“But how? I’m not…I’d never sleep around.” His parents exchanged a knowing look with each other.

“We don’t necessarily approve of your lifestyle, but we support you either way. We’ll love you no matter what you do,” said his mum.

There was so much to take in. Jenny’s hopes of waking up in her old body were rapidly dwindling away to nothing.

3: Daily Pains

It had taken half the night for Jenny to get back to sleep again. No matter how she tossed and turned no position seemed comfortable. Her belly and swollen boobs were always squashed up against something, their weight a constant reminder of the terrifying mutability of reality. Sometime in the small hours of the morning she’d finally drifted off into a mercifully dreamless sleep.

She woke up feeling nauseous. Morning sickness was only supposed to affect people in the first few months but it looked like she’d hit the jackpot. Not only did she get to drag around a pregnancy belly that felt like it weighed as much as the rest of her body combined, she got to watch yesterday’s dinner disappear around the S-bend too. She’d only been awake for twenty minutes and already decided she was going to hate every second of this experience.

Once Jenny was confident that her stomach had settled she waddled to the kitchen. Even covering that short distance was an effort in her current state. An extra seventy pounds on her poorly conditioned body was nothing to sneeze at. She collapsed onto a chair as soon as she arrived.

“Good morning!” her mum chirped. She was altogether too cheerful for Jenny’s liking. “Do you want breakfast?”

Jenny was simultaneously ravenous and acutely aware of how recently she’d been bent over the toilet while her insides promoted themselves to outsides. She settled for a glass of water and some dry biscuits for the time being. Five minutes later she felt an urgent need to pee and waddled back to the bathroom. Water was going in one end and straight out the other. By the time she’d made the slow, exhausting journey back to the kitchen she felt like she needed to go again

“Oh god, I can’t put up with this for much longer,” she mumbled to herself.

The pressure her new womb was exerting only became more disturbing when she started to notice the intermittent kicking of six tiny feet inside. A silent prayer to the woman from her dream went unanswered. It was impossible to fight down the fear that she might be this way until the delivery, maybe even beyond. She didn’t feel capable of taking care of three screaming brats. She’d barely been able to take care of herself as Jerry.

Being cooped up in this house with nothing to do but obsess over her body was starting to chip away at Jenny’s sanity. She needed to get out. As Jerry the only place she’d frequented on a regular basis was the local games shop. It was a short walk, even towing all this extra weight she could make it with a few rest stops. Jenny pulled on a pair of black pregnancy stockings and a maternity dress that looked big enough to house a family of four. In a certain sense she supposed it was.

She’d been expecting sympathy – or more likely to be ignored – on the way to the shop. Instead she could feel the glares from the women, and occasional men, she passed. This was a traditional town and a lot of the older generation didn’t take kindly to teen mothers. She assumed Jenny was actually in her early twenties like Jerry, but she had a baby face and the passing strangers were happy to judge on appearances.

Her expectation that young people might be less judgemental was shattered at the games store. The crowd there were just as fast to give her disapproving looks. She thought she heard a couple whispering about her when her back was turned. Something about sluts who were too dumb to work out a condom. Jenny didn’t stick around to find out what they were saying. Being confronted with a new, vastly different life overnight had already stretched her mental resources to breaking point. She simply didn’t have the energy to deal with this. Without a second thought she hightailed it back home. She’d come here to forget about her stresses, not have more piled on.

By the time she got home she was sweating like a pig. The extra weight and the awkward waddle she had to adapt to get anywhere really took their toll. Pregnancy sucked and being a woman sucked. Maybe if she went to bed she’d wake up in her old life again. As real as this felt it had to be a nightmare.

4: Conjugal Visit

Another day had passed and Jenny was starting to get used to the constant discomfort of her gravid body. She’d thrown up some more in the morning and spent the last few hours trying to cool off from a never-ending procession of hot flashes. She couldn’t even lie on her bed to relax for too long, it felt like her bladder was the size of a pea with the weight of the triplets bearing down on it.

“Why is this happening to me?” she moaned. On the one hand she wanted this to be over, but it felt like the only way it was going to end was with her as a slave to three children for the next eighteen years. Things were only going to go downhill from here.

She was distracted from self-pity by her phone. The ringtone was some kitsch girly pop group that she wouldn’t have touched with a six foot pole as a man, but apparently in this world she enjoyed them enough to hear their sappy lyrics every time there was a phone call for her. She rolled off the bed like a turtle flipped on its back and answered the phone on the final ring.

“Hello, this is Jenny.”

“Yo Jenny, it’s Phil. You up to anything princess? I thought I might drop over and see how the buns are cookin’ in your oven.”

“Um, ok?”

“Ok, see you soon babe.”

The line clicked dead. Was that the father? Jenny was already kicking herself for impulsively agreeing to have him over. Oh well, at least it’d break the monotony of staring at her pregnancy boobs and waiting for tiny humans to pop out of her. She wondered what he’d be like. Obviously she’d seen something in him to let him do this to her. As Jerry she’d never had a girlfriend, she was slightly curious what it’d be like to have a partner even if the genders were flipped around.

Twenty minutes later her parents yelled down that she had a visitor. With bated breath she waddled upstairs to greet her babies’ father. A million scenarios ran through her head. Would he be kind? Mean? Attractive? Affectionate? And how would she react to having a man professing his love for her? Even worse, what if there was nothing between them and she’d just been a one night stand gone bad? It felt like that was by far the worst situation she could be in. She could put aside her squeamishness at being with a man if it meant a little support. Nothing could be worse than being left to bear the burdens of her new life alone.

The door swung open to reveal a man – a boy really – who looked like he barely scraped in over the legal drinking age. He had the glazed eyes of a chronic stoner – Jenny knew the look very well from her previous life. Still, if she’d taken anything away from her trip to the shops yesterday it was that you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. She invited him in and they disappeared together down to her room.

“How’s it coming along? You look ready to pop,” laughed Phil.

“It’s tough. I feel…just gross, all the time. And the looks I get when I go out it’s…uggh.” She could barely finish her sentence as the despair of knowing she was stuck like this washed over her.

“Do you mind if I feel?” asked her boyfriend.

Jenny shrugged her shoulders and pulled her shirt up to just under the line of her maternity bra. His hands rubbed over her bulbous torso, feeling the life growing inside her. After a while they drifted up to cup her breasts.

“You know you’ve still got an amazing body babe”

Although she still felt like a man inside, Jenny was flattered. A few days walking around in a bloated body like this made any compliment sound like music to her ears. She told Phil as much and he gave her a peck on the cheek. Maybe it was just the hormones talking but she genuinely felt something for the man in front of her. She pulled him close and kissed him again, harder this time wanting to get across some of the passion she was feeling. Acceptance was a powerful aphrodisiac.

Jenny’s hands ran over her partner’s body. Could she really do this? As a guy she never would have considered sleeping with another man in a million years, but as a woman it just felt right somehow. She was the mother to this man’s children, a part of him was growing inside her already. It was difficult to see how letting him stick his dick in could be any more intimate than their current situation.

Phil’s hands were unbuckling her bra now. It fell away to reveal her engorged breasts. Swollen veins were visible just below the surface running towards her large, dark nipples. She only hoped that they’d retreat to a more manageable size after she delivered. Phil certainly seemed to enjoy them, he left her mouth to inscribe a circle around her large nipples with his lips. The gentle suction was glorious, better by far than when he’d touched himself as a man.

It seemed unfair that he was doing all the work while she sat back and enjoyed it. She pulled down his pants and started rubbing his cock, watching it spring to life under her soft, womanly hands. He returned the favour as his fingers crept under her huge belly into her pants. They touched on the little red nub she hadn’t even realised she had and brought her into a whole new world. It was like nothing she’d ever experienced before, she had her doubts that her old male body had even had the capacity for the kind of sensations her partner was giving her right now.

“Do you want to do it?” Phil whispered.

“It won’t hurt the babies will it?” So far her first time as a woman had been the most intense sexual experience of her life. If she’d derived this much enjoyment from her boyfriend’s fingers she could only imagine what it’d be like to be mustered into an orgasm by his hard rod. Her only concern was her unborn children. Knowing they were there 24/7 they’d started to take on individual identities in her mind. She’d started attaching significance to every movement and kick she felt inside herself. She hated to admit it but she was getting a bad case of maternal instincts.

“No, it’ll be fine. I’m not that long!” he laughed.

Jenny got down on all fours so that he could get inside her without having her belly in the way. Bending over like this only accentuated the changes in her body. The full weight of her pendulous womb and enlarged breasts was pulling on her. The mild discomfort in her back was tolerable so long as she focussed on the reward she was about to receive. While she waited for Phil to take her hard and unprotected she rubbed herself some more. The feeling of fingertips circling her clit was just heavenly. She wondered how women could ever drag themselves away from this for long enough to get anything done. The first time was always the greatest and it occurred to her that she might be the first woman to ever have the pleasure of losing her virginity while nine months pregnant.

The first moment his cock pushed through the lips of her womanhood was ecstasy. As it buried itself deep inside her she quivered with aroused anticipation. Phil started thrusting and suddenly there was nothing else in the world but her hand and his cock. The discomfort of her fat, fertile body faded from awareness as this new pleasure overtook her. The head of his powerful cock was rubbing at the sensitive spots inside her, eliciting moans and exhortations she never thought she’d hear from her own mouth. His hands curled around her gelatinous thighs, pulling her back forcefully onto his cock as he thrust forward.

The pleasure in her loins was getting stronger, was this what it felt like to climax as a woman? Her lover spurted his load into her and she realised that what she’d felt a moment ago was merely the faintest shadow of her approaching orgasm. Her head flew back as she cried out for more. Phil kept pumping away with his still hard manhood, his slick creamy seed providing an additional lubricant as it mingled with her juices.

5: Happy Birthday

Jenny woke up in her boyfriend’s arms. It was impossible to tell what time it was in the underground room, she fumbled around in the dark to find her phone. It was 3am. An intense cramp rippled across her stomach. Jenny prayed that it was just something bad she’d eaten. As another wave of pain swept across her abdomen she realised it couldn’t possibly be anything so simple. She’d had food poisoning before – Jerry’s eating habits weren’t great – but that pain was never so severe or so widespread. She desperately resisted the urge to devolve into a panicked mess.

“Phil. Phil! Wake up! I think the babies are coming.” She frantically shook her sleeping partner. He murmured and rolled away to the other side of the bed. “You need to wake up!” she screeched, slapping him hard on the arm as she did. That got his attention.

“Wah? What’s going on?” he asked half awake.

“I’m getting contractions. I think it’s time.”

“Oh shit! Shit, we need to get your parents.”

It was almost reassuring to see someone else as panicked about the whole thing as she was. They ran upstairs together. At least Jenny tried to, it was difficult to move at more than a lumbering snail’s pace carrying 200lbs on a frame built for 130. By the time she made it to the top of the basement stairs Phil was waiting with her parents.

“Is it really happening?” her mum asked.

Between gasps for air after trying to run up the stairs, Jenny told her it was. As she was bundled out to the car Jenny could feel a wet spot growing around her crotch. Her waters had broken, suddenly the reality hit her hard – she was about to become a mother. She felt a little guilty sitting on the nice clean seats of her parent’s car as they revved up and raced away into the night.

Two days ago it had been absolutely inconceivable that she’d be in this situation. A conception she hadn’t even been present for had destroyed the safety of that assumption. Another intense contraction crossed her belly. An organ she hadn’t even had for the first twenty four years of her life was rapidly becoming the bane of her existence. Was it too late to demand a C-section? The painful contractions of her womb seemed to be getting closer together already. Everything was happening so fast. It was terrifying to think that in the space of a little over forty eight hours she’d gone from a young man with no responsibilities to the cusp of becoming a mother of three. At least she’d be able to abandon the awkward waddle and be free of the constant dull ache in her lower back soon.

Jenny had never been so thankful that they lived close to a hospital as she was tonight. They pulled into the drop-off zone in front of the hospital and Phil and her mother helped Jenny climb out of the car. It was ridiculous how difficult such simple things became when she was shaped like a pear with legs. Her dad went to park the car while the other two led her inside.

Jenny had been expecting to be whisked away to the maternity ward the moment she stepped in, but instead the trio was told to wait at the counter while the staff exchanged phone calls with the midwives. She was feeling the need to pee again, that sensation had been like a constant companion for all her time as Jenny. It was a lot less distracting now of course, she had much more serious things on her mind.

Jenny’s mum volunteered to stay and wait for her father when an orderly came down to retrieve the expectant couple. Twenty minutes later Jenny was feeling extremely exposed in an open hospital gown with her legs up in stirrups and birth canal bare for all the world to see. An intimidatingly large contingent of midwives and their students shuffled into the room. They assured her that everyone here was a highly trained professional and she had no need to worry. The point was undermined somewhat by the nervous huddle of trainees in the corner looking like they were barely out of school. People scurried around setting up lines, jotting down notes and occasionally offering well-practiced words to placate her rising anxiety. Phil clutched her hand tightly. Although they’d only met yesterday – at least from Jenny’s perspective – he was still the most familiar thing in this hideously alien environment.

Contractions were coming thick and fast now. The head of the birthing bed had been lowered so her nether regions could be more easily accessed by the clinicians. She wished someone would just cover her up, she was starting to think of this body as her own and the embarrassment of strangers gawking over it hit hard.

It felt like she was lying there for hours while the midwives wandered back and forth, leaving to tend to other patients, coming back to check her vital signs and drug doses every once in a while. All the time her contractions were worsening, the painkillers barely covered them. Then she reached some critical point in the process and suddenly everyone was interested in her again.

“Push!” shouted the midwife. “Push!”

Jenny simply did what she was told. This was all so far out of her comfort zone. She was still mostly a young man inside even if she was gradually beginning to identify with the way everyone else saw her.

The miracle of birth had been greatly overhyped, as she soon discovered. There was nothing but pain, bodily fluids and humiliation. It took forever for the first one to show its head. It felt as if it was going to break her in half. The relief when an obstetrician finally showed up to pull it the last few inches was overshadowed by the knowledge that she had two more inside her waiting to come out the same way.

The midwife was kind enough to clean off the first and place it between Jenny’s engorged breasts so she could get acquainted. She wasn’t sure whether she loved or hated the little creature that had sprung from her loins. When it started crying she panicked, unsure what to do. A nurse rocked the baby gently until it calmed down, assuring Jenny that it was normal to feel overwhelmed. She was sure that the sound of crying children was soon going to be a regular fixture in her new life.

6: Family Life

It had been a month and a half since Jenny’s journey to the hospital. She’d stubbornly hoped that once she’d given birth the woman from her dream would return to place her back in her old body. At first she’d been angry, frustrated when she woke up to her wailing triplets each night to find that she was still herself. She’d felt like a human cow, half her life seemed to consist of waiting for the children to latch on, nursing them to sleep on her nipple or milking herself so her parents would have something to give them from the fridge on the rare occasions she could get away for a few hours. Sleep deprivation combined with the constant feeling of bloat from the pregnancy weight and her continually full breasts was enough to have her tearing her hair out.

Eventually she’d accepted that her new body was going to be permanent. There was no going back to being Jerry. After a while she started to wonder whether she even truly wanted to go back to the layabout she’d once been. Sure, her current life was stressful beyond belief, but she felt like she was achieving something. It felt good to know that she was somehow succeeding in keeping the three howling banshees she’d spawned alive and well. It helped to know that Phil was there for her too. Having someone else there to commiserate with over the daily challenges meant the world to her. As Jerry he never could have loved a man, but in the pressure cooker of parenting three insatiable infants she found herself caring for him more and more each day. The amazing encounter they’d shared the first day they met was no fluke either, he was a genuine tiger in bed.

It was early days, but Jenny was developing an increasing level of respect for her own parents too. Not just for the tasks they took upon themselves to help out with now she had her own family, but for the fact that they must have gone through all the same things for her once upon a time. She only hoped that her kids wouldn’t still be living in her basement when they were twenty four. That might be a little more than she could handle.

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Natasha Koshkov is a budding erotica author from Brisbane in sunny Australia. After a brief period as a professional nomad she decided to settle down and get a real job. Increasingly desperate for ways to employ her filthy mind, she has since turned her hand to writing erotic fiction. Please visit me at natasha-koshkov.com if you enjoyed this story!