I am in a weird place at the moment. Its kinda like this: (part of my brain): "Any moment now, my facade of happiness will crack, and I'll tumble into a depression ..... any moment now .... I'm braced, I'm ready, bring on the sad .... any time now ... (taps a foot ) ... yeah, it will sure will be awful .... when that big downer hits .... any time now ..."
and on and on like that ...
Comments
Ever hear the phrase "Stinkin' thinkin'"
Dorothy my girl, what you've got there is a bad case of stinkin' thinkin'. It's the same kind of thing addicts battle. They get stuck on what it will take to make them fall off the wagon and take that drink or toke or shoot up. They just know that the least little thing will shatter their resolve to get strait and stay strait.
You need some good old positive thinking to combat it. A while back, when you were down, I sent you a link to a song. In case you don't still have it, here it is again. "Hello My Name Is"
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
This too shall pass
Maybe you will suffer another emotional downturn.
And maybe it'll be horrible, I don't want to minimize it.
But I'd put money on the fact that it won't swallow you up
and that it won't last. This isn't mind reading or some godlike omniscience
on my part; all a person has to do is chart the frequency of your positive, hopeful
posts and your despairing ones over the recent years to see that this is generally the case.
And if it does hit, well you've got a lot of friends here who know there's nothing fundamentally
wrong with you and who will listen and give HUGS until you can climb back out of the pit;
because what you bring to this site is all good, and we value and love you...
~[insert typical Laika-type defensive-about-expressing-honest-emotion wisecrack here] Veronica
What borders on pure insanity?
Canada and Mexico.
.
Depression :-(
I'm dealing as a caretaker of a depressed person and it is a battle. You are doing good even with these set backs. First good sign is that you acknowledge you have this disorder and you seek help KUDOS for that, my bother is first letting me help after year of fighting me.
CYBER HUGS
Jerkbrain
I think this is what the folks over at captainawkward.com call your "jerkbrain" -- the piece of your brain that is filling your head with all kinds of dysfunctional stuff.