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Well, it was a mixed bag of emotions at my daughter's birthday last night. I was very happy to have some time with her, of course, and the food was good, but the conversation ?
Well, not so much.
See, my mom started talking about my brother going to college, and my sister in law going to university, and how successful they were and are, but when it came to mentioning me ... well, let's just say I have had less success in my life.
Now, most of that lack of success is my own fault for not getting help for my mental health issues and refusing to deal with my gender struggle, and I know my mom didn't mean any harm, but at the same time, it kinda stung.
I, of course, made it worse by not saying anything, even though I wanted to mention the few successes I have had - like publishing a novel, and reading a poem I wrote for my church.
Ah, well.
Comments
Familes...
Familes, who needs them eh?
We do but in moderation.
Well done for not clocking them one!
Close family members...
Can be your absolute worst enemies at times. Keep your chin up, Dorothy, and know you can get support from lots of folks here.
Love
When you tell someone you love them you've put your heart on an anvil and handed them a sledgehammer. What they do next is up to them.
Society tells us that we are supposed to love our family. I have 69 years of very mixed results in that regard.
Families are more competitive than the NFL, but unlike the NFL -- your family will often move the goalposts.
Finding your own way in this world is complex. Negotiating a gender transfer is much more daunting than attaining a college degree.
You know that - - - they don't.
I'm very sorry you have to put up with their ignorance. Let's all hope the next ten years will see as much positive movement toward total acceptance as we've seen in the last ten years.
If you think about the millions that are spent by the thought police, who are tied by a mutual desire to pay much less in taxes, it is absolutely amazing that transgender individuals aren't universally scorned. People aren't stupid. People are as a rule pretty damned decent to one another.
One thing that is universal to EVERY major religion is the Golden Rule. The Koch Brothers and the DeVos family, with all their billions, can't change that.
The next time you have a family gathering wear a T-shirt that says, "I love you -- despite what you think of me, because that's what Jesus said I should do." Bring a spare in case someone asks you for the shirt off your back.
Jill
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Re: Love
'wear a T-shirt that says, "I love you -- despite what you think of me, because that's what Jesus said I should do."'
And that is exactly what so many people in our society refuse to do, they'd rather attack someone for being different.
I've been a pagan for over a quarter century, but I'd take and wear one of those shirts because that message is how we SHOULD live.
There are lots of ways of measuring success
yours are different from the usual but just as valid. Follow your own truth and don't let the ignorance of others get you down.
Angharad
So many ways to measure "success"...
It could be you don't need college, a stressed filled job or a corner office on the 85th floor this time around. There are a lot of people would could count having a family, a roof over their head and food on the table "success". Don't let others define success for you.
My mom's been disappointed in me for nearly 60 years. I just remind myself that my one marriage outlasted all three of hers put together.