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The Might-Have-Been Girl A novel by Bronwen Welsh Copyright 2015

Chapter 9 'Theatre royalty' and another date with Reggie.

The week went by with more sell-out performances, and judging by the applause at the end of each act and at the final curtain, the audience was really enjoying it. As I stood in the wings with Ross waiting for my cue, I kept thinking about how lucky I was to be doing something I really loved. At each performance, there was an increasing number of school children present. Word was obviously getting around, presumably each school letting others know that this was the only opportunity to see the play on stage.

One evening there was a surprise. David came on stage just after the final curtain had fallen and told Emma and I that he wanted a word with us.

“We had theatre royalty in the audience tonight, Dame Emily Good, and I understand it's down to you two,” he said, “I didn't tell you before the performance in case it put you off.”

“Oh goodness Emma, she did come after all!” I almost squeaked in my excitement.

“She's here with her daughter who's an actress too and would like to meet you to congratulate you on the performance. I sat them in the Royal Box and I've ushered them into my office by the back corridor so that she isn't mobbed by the audience.”

Emma and I gripped each other's hand as we followed David to his office. My heart was racing and I wondered if I should curtsey when I entered the room.

“My dears, how nice to see you again,” Dame Emily said standing up to greet us. “This is my daughter Cressy; she's an actress too. We enjoyed the play so much that we couldn't leave without offering our congratulations. David tells me that this is your first role Harriet; I find that quite amazing.”

“Thank you so much,” I replied, blushing scarlet. “Everyone has been so helpful and encouraging.”

She smiled. “Well, that only takes you so far. You have real talent young lady and I hope to see you in many more roles. I hope you will contact me when you are next in London and I'll do what I can to help.”

I was close to speechless and somehow managed to stammer out my thanks. I know this sounds silly, but after they left, I suddenly felt light-headed and Emma had to make me sit down and have a drink of water.

“Pinch me, I think I'm dreaming,” I said faintly.

Emma smiled. “You've made a very useful friend there. She's obviously forgiven you for not recognising her on the tube!”

I couldn't think of a smart riposte to that, so I just sat there in a happy daze.

Word got around the rest of the cast and crew of course and we both received congratulations. Thank goodness they are not a jealous group.

I was looking forward to my next date with Reggie. (I might keep protesting to Emma that they were not 'dates', but in my heart of hearts I knew they were.) He rang on Thursday to check that it was still on and asked me where I wanted to go. I suggested that this time he should decide and make it a surprise.

Sunday morning came around and I was up early to get ready. The day was overcast and the forecast was for a chilly day, so Emma suggested that I wear jeans instead of a skirt.

“I know that you prefer skirts, but it really isn't the weather for them, and you can still look very feminine wearing jeans and a pretty top,” she said. “Another thing is that you would find you were the only girl your age wearing a skirt and you don't want to draw attention to yourself do you?”

I was learning to take her advice, so I did as she said. I was fairly confident that no-one was going to 'read' me, but why take a chance?

“Where are we going?” I asked as we were seated in the car and Reggie drove off.

“Somewhere you've never been before. I can guarantee that.”

I was intrigued. How could he be so sure? The secret was finally revealed when Reggie drove across the Thames to the South Bank. Towering above us was the London Eye, the tallest Ferris wheel in the world at that time.

“It only opened in March last year so I'm sure you haven't been on it,” said Reggie as he parked at Waterloo and we set off on the short walk to the wheel. “I hope you've got a good head for heights, it's over four hundred feet tall.”

I wasn't sure how I would feel having never been that high before, but with Reggie beside me, I was sure I could manage it.

It was already a very popular tourist attraction, so after Reggie bought our tickets we had to stand in a queue to enter one of the large capsules which hold up to twenty-five people. We were looking around at the huge superstructure when a woman's voice from in front of us said in a coquettish tone “Hello Reggie.”

We both turned to look at her. I try to be friendly to everyone I meet, but there was something about this girl that made me take an instant dislike to her. From her long dyed blonde hair with black roots surrounding an over-made-up face to her dress with a ridiculously short hemline and a plunging neckline which barely contained her 'assets', everything about her screamed 'tart'. I could choose a worse word but I'll leave it at that.

Reggie looked embarrassed. “Oh, hi Samantha,” he said.

Seeing her inquiring look at me he added: “Sam, this is Harriet, a friend down from Bridchester.”

“Hello,” I said. There was no point in adding 'Nice to meet you' when I didn't mean it.

“Bridchester, 'oop north',” she said in what she imagined to be a comical northern accent.

“Yes, that's right,” I replied, trying not to sound too cold.

“Down long are you?” she asked.

“About a month,” I replied. I felt embarrassed that I was answering her so abruptly, but frankly, the sooner this conversation ended the better. Fortunately, the queue started to move forward and Sam's friends called to her as they were just about the enter a capsule, so she said “Well, I'm sure you'll enjoy a great ride with Reggie,” as she turned to follow her friends.

I was seething. Just what exactly did she mean by that final remark, or was it exactly what I thought it meant?

“Who was that?” I said to Reggie. He had hardly uttered a word during this encounter.

“Sam was one of the tellers in the branch where I work,” he said.

“Surely not dressed like that?”

“Not exactly; the counter staff do wear a uniform,” he managed a slight smile. “Mind you she did take up the hem of her skirt six inches and management made her put it back down again.”

“You said 'was' one of the tellers',” I said.

“She left straight after the New Year. There was a drinks party at work on the Friday before New Year's Eve. I wasn't there. The scuttlebutt was that she was caught having sex in a storeroom with one of the work experience students who just happened to be the son of a senior manager. The first day back at work it was strongly suggested to her that she hand in her resignation. The alternative wasn't spelled out but it was pretty obvious. The ironic thing is she might have got away with it if she wasn't so darn noisy having sex.”

There was a silence as we both digested the significance of that remark.

‘How on earth does he know that?’ I thought to myself, not wanting to believe the obvious answer.

“Well that's what I've been told, anyway,” he said lamely, but we both knew it was too late. I felt so disappointed in Reggie, not because he'd had sex, but that it had been with her. Supposing she had become pregnant? Knowing Reggie, he would have felt obliged to 'do the right thing' and marry her and what a disaster that would have been.

We moved forward and took our place in the capsule. Thank goodness it wasn't the one Sam had entered. I would have refused to go into the same one anyway. We moved off slowly, and to my surprise, I wasn't worried as we slowly rose up in the air. The view was certainly sensational. At one point I looked up at the capsule in front and now above us. I saw Sam looking down at us and if looks could kill I'd be being measured up for a pine box. I looked away, ignoring her. She wasn't going to scare me.

The whole circuit of the wheel took half an hour. I did talk to Reggie as he pointed out some of the London landmarks.

“This is the largest wheel in Europe,” he said. “Well at least for now. Someone else will probably decide they need to build a bigger one.”

“The male preoccupation with having the biggest one?” I said. It was meant to be a joke, but somehow it fell flat.

After the Eye, we walked through Jubilee Gardens to Sea Life, the London Aquarium. It had amazing displays of fish and other sea creatures and normally I would have been fascinated, but I was acutely aware there was a distance between Reggie and me and I didn't know how to deal with it. Eventually, I turned to Reggie and said “I'm sorry Reggie, I'm not feeling very well today, I have a terrible headache. Would you mind taking me back to the hotel?”

“Of course,” he said, and he looked so miserable my heart went out to him, but I couldn't help how I was feeling.

We drove back to the hotel almost in silence, and when the car pulled up outside and Reggie said “Next Sunday?”, my reply was “Why don't you ring me?” I didn't kiss him goodbye.

I went straight up to the room and fortunately, Emma was still out. I threw myself on the bed and sobbed. Was this what it was like being a girl, finding out your boyfriend had had sex with an awful girl, just because she threw herself at him?

By the time Emma came back, I had cried myself to sleep, but the tear-tracks on my makeup could not be hidden when I awoke. Emma sat beside me on the bed.

“What's up kid?” she asked. I could feel my eyes brimming again as I told her everything that had happened. When I finally ran out of things to say, she sat in silence for a while.

“Well you can't really say he was unfaithful to you,” said Emma. “That happened before you even met up.”

“I know that,” I said. “It's just she was such a horrible person. I just don't know what he saw in her.”

“Well I can't answer that. Perhaps he was lonely? He hasn't been in London very long and doesn't know many people. Perhaps it was the hormones kicking in?”

“I know you'll say that I of all people should understand how boys feel, but the fact is I don't. Am I being unreasonable? I suppose I wanted him to be pure and untouched.”

“Perhaps he is,” said Emma. “After all, he didn't actually say he went to bed with her.”

“Well, how did he know about her being noisy having sex?”

“I imagine it was common knowledge in the bank. Anyhow, we live in different times now Harriet. Very few people are virgins by their mid-twenties, I know none of my friends were when they got married. Most people take the view 'Don't ask, don't tell'. Let whatever is in the past stay in the past.”

“I suppose you're right,” I said. “But I feel at such a disadvantage; he can't even have sex with me, so why would he want to be my friend?”

Even as I said it I thought 'I'm glad Reggie didn't hear me say that. It makes it sound like I think he's very shallow.'

Emma laughed “My dear little sister, there is a lot more to sexual intimacy than you realise, and don't forget that the most important sex organ isn't where you think – it's the brain, and I'm sure both you and Reggie have one of those! As to why he would want to be your friend, that's simple, he likes you – very much, and always has done. That's much more important in a relationship than sex. Surely you can see that. And you, you like him too don't you?”

I could feel myself reddening “You know I do.” My heart sank. “Do you think he'll ring me again after how I reacted today?”

“I think he will,” said Emma. “And if he doesn't, well you have to write it off to experience. You may not have realised it at the time but you reacted exactly as any girl would in those circumstances.”

That wasn't really something I cared to think about. Reggie was my first boyfriend, (there, I'd admitted it to myself), and now I knew how much I wanted to keep him. Life seemed to be getting very complicated. After all, I was supposed to go back to being a boy when I returned to Bridchester, but that would mean the end of my relationship with Reggie. He would only be interested in me as a girl, I was sure of that. I wondered if he was already thinking of me as one, but how could I ask him a question like that? In fact, how would I answer if he asked me how I saw myself?

To be continued

I would like to acknowledge the assistance of Louise Anne in proofreading the text and giving me a great deal of useful advice about modern-day Britain to incorporate in the story.