Sixteen Feet of Steel Chapter 16

Printer-friendly version

Sixteen Feet of Steel Chapter 16

*Before…

I’m staring stunned at the whole thing and Jessa gives me a nudge. “C’mon we’ll be holding them up enough. Let’s get aboard and get you out of here and on your way to Sanctuary.”

I think I’m in stunned shock as I let her guide me to one of the coach like parts where everyone else is and I’m still staring since we have nothing like this…even remotely.

I sit and exhale and look around before there’s this sudden jolt and we start moving.

I can’t help it I’m out of my seat once we’re moving and we’re getting faster and faster as this huge iron beast gets up to the speed of a fast gallop and I’m leaning against the frames of the glass windows in the coach and then there’s a latch and I open the window and stick my head out and it makes my hair whip sideways and I’m smiling like I haven’t in a while.

*And Now…

Rattatatatatata-chunk, chunk, chunk…

The sound is almost hypnotic.

The motion the sound and the power in the Iron Rhino and I mean that literally as it’s getting into sunset and I feel a wave from the front and there’s power that flows past and under me and there are illumination bulbs coming to life inside little brass cages and I look around as are the others.

Well I feel better for not being the only person impressed with this.

I look around for a few more moments trying to take it all in and very much failing because there’s too much from the illuminations and all of the glass and the windows to the fine works on the bench seats.

I sit down beside Nicole who is looking out the window and actually pretty awake.

“This is pretty amazing.”

She nods. “We were headed here by the way.”

I nod. “But the fever.”

She nods. “I had a duty to my people and that comes first before title.”

I smile. “Honestly I would have likely insisted on staying anyway.”

She looks at me. “How are you doing though, I’m sorry but I’d think that you’d be having a much harder time with being made into a girl than this.”

I sigh. “Honestly I’m trying not to think about it, that’s not working of course but I’m still trying.”

“I thought you’d be a lot more upset.”

“I think I’m in shock or that I’m bespelled.”

“Bespelled? By your mother?”

“She could fly and change my sex with magic so I’ve been thinking that she might have foreseen a side effect of all of this and did something so that I could function.”

Nicole looks at me. “I guess that’d make sense you’d have to function as a girl and not be acting out all the time.”

I grin. “A girl running around ranting about finding her cock would be noticed and I wouldn’t be talking about a rooster.”

We both end up laughing at that and yes I giggled a little in that and we finish by smiling at each other and then there’s the rhino’s carriage page coming down the middle of the car with a wheeled tray with tins of sweets and two big pots of good tea and then there’s long cutting boards with bread cut into neat slices and butters and potted meats or jams.

We get served some tea in enameled flagons with teapot like lids and we take napkins and we get some food and Jessa joins us too.

The tea is very good and a nice change though different that what Alaan had but this is still lovely and the bread, the bread is rich and brown and I can taste the savoryness of it having rye? I think it’s rye but there’s this sweetness too that’s concentrated in the top and I have two slices with just butter.

Jessa and Nicole have the potted meat but I’m content with just a good tea and bread and butter right now and the bread is that good and fine that I chew it slowly and savor the feel of it.

“I am never going to look at the same things ever in the same ways.”

Jessa smiled around a mouthful of bread with something that was I think rabbit in fat and gel and onions and spices. “Well we’re getting all that gilt rubbed off and we’re seeing the good steel neath it all.”

I look at her and smirk. “Well at least I’ll still be shiny.”

We eat and laugh a little more and then we’re sipping tea and just watching out the windows and the landscape or what we can see of it is changing. There’s less trees and what looks like settled farmland and I see lights and then their gone…a village or a town close to this steam road and we passed it by so fast and I watch it as those lights fade out of sight.

It’s like that a few times too it’s scary and amazing at how fast we’re going.

Not that I haven’t go faster but that was Lady Blackhand’s power that did that and this is different this is carrying soldiers and weapons and battleknights and cargo even and we’re now going faster than a racing horse and it’s non-stop, barely slowing and that’s a huge thing.

“People home would lose their minds over this, the nobles would love this and they’d hate this.”

Nicole says. “It’s that way here in some places certain lands forbid it and some want exorbant rates to have the road go through so it’s limited without The Lady doing something like claiming the needed land on behalf of the needs of the realms and she won’t do something that underhanded.”

Jessa… “T’is a dwarven thing really I’ve seen these in use when I was in their realms but the keep them mostly inside their realm.”

“Inside…like the mountains?” I ask.

She nods. “Aye, they life on the surface too and all but the great dwarven realm itself is under the mountains.”

Nicole… “It’s extremely easy to fortify a mountain really.”

I nod too. “That makes sense and I heard that they are inventive and mechanical and secretive.”

Jessa shrugs. “They’re far more of a community than humanity, they share more and they’re an old race too.”

I look at her. “But this is an ancient human idea.”

She nods. “And they know it and recovered it somehow.”

I look at her. “But it’s human knowledge.”

She actually grins at me. “And that means what? They’ll out live us by thrice on the average and what do humans do with what we have most of the time? And frankly they’re dwarves and not humans they have no obligation to us as a race.”

I’m…okay that’s disturbing in a way.

This would not go over well home we’re all human home and the idea that we’re not at the center of things as a race seems odd to me.

Even disturbing and scary a little.

The girls look at me like they know what I’m thinking and Nicole says. “We’re allies though, there’s worse things that human and dwarven and elven politics in the world.”

I look at her. “Will there be elves there too?”

She shakes her head no. “Elves rarely show here or anywhere really they keep to their lands.”

I nod. “They try and keep out of everything from what father said, they didn’t even get involved with the battle with Blackhand.”

Nicole nods. “They’re extremely long lived and they have tight defenses as well on their islands.”

Elves here on Titan live on islands out far past where it’s safe for most boats and from what I’ve hear it’s guarded by rocks and almost a labyrinthine series of reefs and rocks and as far as I know they’ve never been invaded.

There’s lots of rumor styled knowledge about them but very little actually know or known by us really they do trade and a lot of the trade is medicines and cloth as far as I know but they’re known always said to be mystical beings.

I look at Nicole after another drink of tea. “So did the dwarves get involved with the fight against Rory Blackhand?”

Nicole nods. “Some, there were volunteers and then there were specialists involved.”

“I didn’t know that it’s not in a lot of what I’ve read.”

Jessa says. “There be a lot that isn’t writ, the royals have reasons fer keeping tight lipped about the goings on there an all.”

“Oh?”

Nicole nods. “There’s always such with some of the particulars in a big event like that.”

I nod actually looking at things I’m pretty sure that I’m one of those secrets. “Are there many dwarves in Sanctuary?”

Nicole nods. “There’s a fair amount especially in Boot Town?”

“Boot Town?”

“It’s what we call the under town.”

“Undertown?” I am pretty confused.

Nicole nods. “The dwarves helped build the city and fortress and not wont to waste they build a whole mass of the city works that are needed and the tunnels for those and then they built out and around from that and all of those workers hooking up things and whatnot built homes close to their works and those being dwarves much of the time it became a regular part of the city.”

I blink… “So there’s a city under the city?”

Jessa nods. “Aye and it’s all smaller tunnels than the streets so it’s foot traffic only hence it’s called Boot town.”

Nicole grins. “You’ll see soon enough.”

I roll my eyes. “You like doing that.”

She nods. “But I wouldn’t want to ruin things for you.”

We pass another two towns or settlements really close together and one looked like it was fortified with a castle. “We’re getting close, things are getting closer together.”

The girls nod and Jessa says. “It won’t be too long now.”

I look out the windows and there’s more lights, and the lights themselves are in little pockets but there’s no more darkness of any length between them anymore. We have to be getting close because it’s like those little pockets of family like houses or large farms or even possibly estates or some such and right now they’re all really close together.

Not close, close but at these speeds it sure seems impressive.

And then things level out…like they go flat and they get darker as we hit this large flat stretch of plains and it’s man made. I can tell it’s that flat and there’s not a hint of anything to break the skyline either and even with the lights on I can see stars out in the sky through the windows.

It’s not a big plain three miles or so and then we’re going uphill some and that’s when I see it.

Sanctuary.

It’s built up on this huge mound maybe three hundred feet and all of that’s flagged with stones at an angle and I see roads and gates and walls and it’s a fortress city with really large walls with big squared off towers that are topped with roofed guardhouses that have pennants blowing from the tops of them.

Even at night I can see this as the city gives off this glow of light and I can feel the electric running through the city in the distance and it all seems so grand…in the distance close to the middle I see other walls and towers and in the center this large dome of white stone unlike anything I have ever really seen.

I inhale some. “How…how is it round?”

Nicole grins and says. “We can ask.”

Jessa says. “It’s mesh over a metal frame then with layers of rock plaster laid over it all ties together between the layers with wire ties.”

“Oh…well that’s all sorts of wonderful really.” I know it sounded sort of odd or something to say but honestly it sort of is the way I’m feeling…that and in shocked awe.

The Iron Rhino pumps along and I realize we’re going around the city not and we’re facing the east side of the city and there’s a break in the walls that’s like several levels or tiers instead of the flagged sides of the mound and there’s the city gates by the look of them and what also looks like the main trading road then across that road and what looks like a caravansary market is another series of warehouses and docks and rails like we’d seen at the City of Threshold and I see another Iron Rhino docked there and with a much longer trail or whatever you call the carts that they pull and even for night it is busy with people and traders and laborers unloading things and I can see a few Battleknights here on a watch and a few Squire’sknights as well.

We’re pulling to a stop and I look over at the tiers the look like the main way into the city and I can see a large road for battle knights and such there and what looks like two tunnels like entrances as well but as open as this is I can see it’s different levels are well fortified and manned.

Jessa says. “These are The Steps they’re the entry part to the city fortress and their named for the tiers.”

I nod. “I think I puzzled that part out but I’m not used to seeing things being this bust at night.”

Nicole’s getting up and I give her a hand doing so and she’s wincing because of sitting and stiffening. “The Rhino’s have helped with trade some but there’s always a trader caravan or three in here and the trade areas are often quite busy as well as the night trades.”

“Night trades?”

“Butchers, the meat markets getting ready for the next day the bakers and all of the ones that collect the trash in the city.”

I blink. “People collect trash, like rubbish and why?”

The girls just looked at me like I’m slack witted.

Jessa says. “It keeps the place clean an free of filth surely Lyonnes did the same.”

I nod. “Father used it as punishment for the drunks and n’ere do wells.”

She looks at me. “Here it be a job, gathering an sweepin and sortin.”

“Sorting?”

“Aye burnable versus not an then there’s the glass an metal for the cullet merchants and then there’s the compostins.”

I shake my head. “We had some of that home, we reused everything we could but that was for the castle and such and not so much a thing done in the town I think that the villages were different though and used all that they could.”

They both nod and Nicole says. “With the population here, we need to keep things as clean as possible to guard against pests and diseases that can so come in easily with trade.”

I nod and just watch with them as they’re unloading our things and the horses and the wagons. Taylor’s grinning as he’s greeting people and he seems to be popular and very known at least and then again there’s Nicole who I can see people here know as well but they’re giving her more of a quiet respect and it’s more than some of the knights here are getting.

But then thinking on it her Lady Tatiana rules here and she’s one of her squires so that must mean something.

And I’ve seen her battle.

And she was out there with just her and Hawk and Taylor and I’ve seen them battle too.

I’m not sure just what this means that I’m in their company but I am glad that I am.

I hope that holds after I meet The Lady of this place too.

The wagon is readied and the horses seem excited in that way that they get when they’ve been on a trip and are close to their home and I’m kind of smiling at that for them and soon we’re on the wagon and we’re getting our escort with the knights that came with us from the battle site and we’re quietly going through the city and I’m watching and looking at so, so much.

There’s a lot of white here, bright tones elsewise and there’s roofs of tiles and again the drainage ditch half pipes I saw at Threshold and a lot of things that seem like how things are done here too.

Except there are electric wires in the air on poles and they have lights like lamps in the streets that we had in the town home but those were heavy brass and leaded glass hanging from wrought iron and we only lit those usually in winter’s dark.

I see wires going into buildings.

Granted these seem like well to do places and they seem to be merchants and the like but there are still quite a few of those really and it’s very strange to see electric illumination coming from windows.

It sort of makes the city cheerful in a way.

It certainly makes it active as we pass places with people doing things inside of all sorts and even having fun in what looks like the commons of taverns and inns and the like.

It’s so odd to be able to see through these large windows into places.

And I do a little “Oh…” as we pass a place with these odd letters carven in the top frame of the window that’s a good banner size and I can see women there with tied scarves around their hair and with trays of fresh baked things being set out and I can smell the breadiness and the different sugary offerings as we pass.

“Those look so good.” And yes I ate of the train but I’m still young.

Taylor laughs. “Well you’ll be in good shape Chrissy because the keep’s kitchens will be doing the same things right now.”

“Really, even the sweets.”

“Aye, there be sweets there as well.”

My stomach growled for me and he and Nicole and Hawk all chuckle as it does.

There’s really though so much to say here about here…there fountains I can see and a public garden and more buildings and more buildings and now that we’re further into the city I can see that some of these buildings are quite large and even some look to have walled yards and courts of their own.

I have been to other close by lands home and I have seen towns that have some of these things but not a place with just so much.

“This is a rich, rich place.” I can’t help it but to say it.

Nicole nods. “While we’re a confederation of fifty some odd loose kingdoms and territories Sanctuary is the capital we’re the center of trade and of justice.”

I nod… “And paid by The Dwarven King to keep the peace.”

And Hawk says. “We are very close neighbors it’s different than in other places where they’re further off.”

It’s us passing what looks like an Arena the makes me quiet and there’s Battleknights there as part of the pillars in the front and there’s wall pennants and there’s even weapons and there’s parts of them in alcoves or on display on stone blocks….I just stare I’ve never seen anything like it.

Nicole says. “That’s the Arena of Champions; it’s one of the oldest Battleknight dueling arenas in the world. We hold games there and contests but it’s also where squires test their skills against each other and where we do the testing and awards of going from a Squire’sknight to a Battleknight.”

I am just… “Wow…and the things are?” I’m gesturing at the trophies?

“Trophies from tournaments and challenges especially famous duels and the like but there’s also guild trophies too.”

“Guild trophies?”

Nicole says. “Like my family we build Battleknights and we are part of a guild for it. There’s eight such guilds here in the city two more in the territories and then sixteen with the dwarves and there’s betting and prizes and honor and such all fought over in competitions here.”

“Really?... There’s…I thought that only nobles and knights could use a Battleknight by law?”

Taylor chimes in with. “Nay not in these lands it is whoever it owns it, they can be willed to folk even and such but the cost and upkeep and such for a battleknight sort of usually renders the point moot anyhows.”

I nod. “I saw the books at home and it took father twenty three coppers a month for The Rampant to keep it clean and oiled and that’s without it being used.”

Hawk nods. “An that’s cheap since I reckon it was a duty in yer house.”

I nod. “My brothers and … would tune and polish and clean to learn but everything else was father and then our master smith’s doing.”

We pass by several huge buildings too set up close to the arena and I can hear machines and Battleknights and the like moving around in behind the walls and the sounds of metal on metal and metal meeting grinders and all the sounds and the smells of heavy industry.

One place has Nicole’s shoulder flash of an anvil and a sword resting on it with a large M over it and it’s not a shield but like a round.

“Your home?” I ask.

Nicole nods. “It is.” She’s smiling but she makes no moves to go there.

“Been awhile?”

“Near a month but they’ll know I’m here by the morning.”

I nod…There’ll not be that for me.

I’m not even sure of the condition of my sisters.

And like this I have no idea how they’d take that news…the news of me.

Nicole actually takes my hand and she holds it and honestly it helps.

And then we’re there.

It front of the castle.

It’s white stone and it’s huge…eight sides by the look of it with high walls that look very thick and maybe thick enough for Squire’sknights to work on…The in the corners of the walls they have a bastion tower that I can see rising up it three separate sections each one a little smaller than the last with enough room for a little rim of a wall and soldiers…likely archers.

And I can see a keep the same way but a much larger section of space and that’s actually what looks like castle fine work with yards and small walls and archways leading in with glass doors that are shining light and again three sections of keep building each many stories high and then there’s that done on the top. I can see the outer walls of the keep have decorations and flags and long tapestries mounted breaking up the white but I can’t really get great looks at them.

Then we have call outs from our escorts instead of the horns and as we’re getting closer there’s a section of the wall were their gate and archway designed barbican is and I’m watching as the portcullis is going down.

And they’re not closing it either it’s going from being in place to sinking underneath the flagstones.

“That’s different.” I say as we’re passing through.

Nicole’s… “Harder to get through the gate goes up and supports can be placed under it to secure it in case of siege.”

I look around. “This place is huge and there’s more military might here than I’ve ever seen who would lay siege to this place? Who could?”

Taylor’s… “I wouldn’t ever want to know but it’s always been like that with The Lady.”

I nod and look around a little more taking things all in…there’s even at night a lot of soldiers and activity and there’s Squire’sknights and I see no less than seven Battleknights and that’s just from where I’m at and then there’s siege weapons….

I get a chill at seeing them and there’s not images but images from my memories and I’m sort of drifting back there to the night of the attack.

I know where I am, and I know that I’m with my friends but my chest is getting tight and my heart’s beating faster and I can feel the shaking my body is doing.

My face is wet too and now I’m crying.

Nicole’s looking at me. “Chrissy, Chrissy look at me…breathe…look at me and breathe…”

She gets in my face, not to be aggressive like I’ve heard it said about being in another person’s face but to literally be in my face so that I’m focused on her, that I can’t help but to focus on her and she’s breathing and it takes a few seconds for me to get where I’m breathing along with her too.

It still makes my chest hurt in a way and feel tight and so…it’s like being not in control but knowing it and feeling it and there’s this…

It’s a dozen screams trying to get out of me and it’s echoing around inside of me instead and it’s freezing me up and I just can’t breathe right and I want to cry.

I am crying, there’s still tears running down my cheeks but I want to cry like fold up on myself and cry and just…

Breathe, breathe, breathe…c’mon I have to just keep breathing right?

I hate this…but I’m feeling myself catching myself.

It’s what it’s like actually, that getting a grip after you’ve had a near fall.

The hammering of my heart slows.

“You alright?” Nicole asks.

“N…No… I…I was okay right, the Goblins, the Wargs, being wounded…then I see the siege engines and I…”

She pulls me close and into a hug. “Chrissy, those things broke your home of course it’s going to be different.”

I can’t help the tears that are flowing harder and harder until I’m bawling hard.

I sort of feel our wagon stop and there’s voices and talking but Nicole doesn’t leave she’s staying right there with me for quite awhile before I hear a strong woman’s voice…not a hard voice but deep, soft…like a voice that’s like good port.

“Make a little room aye.”

I feel Nicole shift and pull us both over a half foot then someone sit beside us on the opposite side of Nicole. I feel a large and muscular arm slip around me from her and she does that one armed hug and lean.

I feel a breast… (Sniffle-cough-laugh.)

I look at her.

She’s huge…seriously the biggest woman I have ever seen with long silvery white hair that’s been tied back pretty at the momently with a strip of tartin cloth and she’s must be close to seven foot… but she’s sitting so I’m just guessing and she’s broad shouldered and thick thighed…big arms and huge breasts that are very prominent and full…and she’s actually beautiful…not in this delicate way but so very much in this powerful womanly way?

I’m not describing just how impactful she is.

Big silvery grey eyes with no blue…? Pointed ears…I can see pointed ears tips peaking through the hair…gods and elohim she has a lot of hair.

“Are you an elf?” (Sniffle.)

“No, I’m not an elf.”

“What are you?”

She looks at me. “I’m your friend Chris, I’m Tatiana Whitehall, Knight Marshal of The West and Commander of Sanctuary and it’s company The Silver Swords.”

I look around and it’s just her and Nicole, Jessa and Taylor.

I take a stuffy nosed breath. “Prince Christian Lyonnes, and heir and…and daughter of Aurora Blackhand….”

I was not very sure of that… of this and her.

Nicole coughs. “We’ve been using Christiana or Chrissy.”

The woman breaks into an easy smile. “I like that I’d wager your mothers would have too.”

“You knew my mother?”

“Deidre? Nay just what Aurora had said, fine person by all account though.”

(Sniffle-sob.) “She was…” I gesture hopelessly at my face. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m….” (Sniffle-whine.)

She nods and pulls me close. “It’s a ‘cause yer here Chrissy, yer journey’s done, yer safe.”

…..

I…

(Sniffle-sob.) “Safe?”

She nods and squeezes me hard enough to make me squeak. “Aye…safe.” She lets me go and slips off the wagon and I was right she’s nearly seven foot tall and built with muscles and yet she’s still beautiful.

“Now you and Coley look dunn in, let’s get ye both to the healers.” She stands with us until we’re down and she walks with us as we’re heading inside keeping pace and a coupe of pages open the doors for us and we head into warm lights of the keep.

up
284 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

Comments

Flashbacks

D. Eden's picture

Flashbacks suck, and there really isn't any rhyme or reason for when they hit you. Been there, done that.

And yeah Bailey, safe is good. Like the Old Viet Nam vets used to say, welcome back to the world Chrissy.

Dallas

D. Eden

Dum Vivimus, Vivamus

Flashbacks are never easy to write.

Trying to get to where it comes across but not to trigger readers and get that all to come together is quite a thing.
Great Big Hugs

Bailey Summers

Sanctuary looks like lives up to its name

The forces that took out Chrissie's home would not even put much of a dent in Sanctuary's defenses. Still, the clock is ticking and she has to mature in her power until the death... erm opposition comes for her. It will be interesting to see how powerful she will be compared to Mom.

It will take Chrissy a lot to catch up to Aurora.

But yes Sanctuary was built for very hard times by Tatiana's commands and by her experience in what she's already seen.
*Great Big Hugs *

Bailey Summers

Wow…

This is really, really good. Worth reading through the disconnected language, I love this story.

At this point, it feels like an arc of Chris's is over, are we going to see more of the sisters?

As always, thank you for writing and sharing.

nice and soft

BarbieLee's picture

There are a few authors who write softly. Their use of hell and damn carries no real fire and brimstone. They write the words and one feels kinda warm and fuzzy after reading the fight to the death of the hero or heroine. It is the spirit of the author spilling out into his or her stories. No matter whether it is an author who can put the blood into blood and guts or an author who wipes their blade clean regretting they had to fight. All good story telling because their soul was in it.

Watch the people who check out at the grocery store and the items they purchase. How they dress, how they stand, how they inter react with those around them including the cashier. One can tell if they are married, single, man, woman, bad day, bad job, etc. just by paying attention.

Authors stories are that way if the author wrote it from the soul.
Very nice story Miss Summers.

Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl

Home

Podracer's picture

Chrissy's home has gone. Now she's come home it feels like. Tatiana comes over as Mother to a company, a city and a nation. And now to another lost girl.

Teri Ann
"Reach for the sun."

Sorry, not understanding ...

Bailey, you have this edgy way of writing that feels so compelling and breathless. Thank you. So I am surmising that this is post apocalyptic, and in this new period, magic and other things have inserted themselves into existence?

I hope this is not the end of the story or there will be a sequel or something?

Thank you.

Gwen

It's not the end of the story Gwen.

Things happened sort of like this. In the ancient past there were two universes one was science and tech the other was majik based. In both portals and gates were used to cover the massive distance between worlds. At one point these portals crossed and they discovered each other and no one knows how things started that far back but war happened and the war ended when the gates for both sides were destroyed causing massive destruction.

Now as per Titan there were starships that were damaged and came down to the planet to survive and humanity is built up from those ships ages later. But no one knows which universe the planet is in if this was the tech verse or the majik based one. Since the majik verse forces were likewise stranded and everything else when the gates were destroyed.

*Big Hugs *

Bailey Summers

Enjoying this story Bailey.

Keep up the great writing girl.

Hugs,
Tamara Jeanne

Thanks Tamara :)

I am really glad you are enjoying the story so much.
*Great Big Hugs *

Bailey Summers

that's a big woman

pointed ears but not an elf. thats going to be an interesting pedigree.
good chapter, thanks

Yay! Made it through another chapter!

And Yay that Chrissy's finally made it to Sanctuary! Pretty amazing ride so far Ms. Summers! Now to find out what has become of her Lands and Siblings. Loving Hugs Talia

Glad you liked it Talia.

I'm working on chapter 21 right now actually.
* Great Big Hugs *

Bailey Summers

Safe

She is safe for now but how long is that going to last for. Now it’s time for her to decompress some and let it out.

hugs :)
Michelle SidheElf Amaianna

It had to hit her some time

Jamie Lee's picture

Chrissy's been through a hell of an experience. Her home attacked, people killed, he sent off in order to be safe and becoming a girl. The goblin attack, twice, and taking care of that village with scarlet fever.

While she was stoic through it all, or trying to be stoic, reaching sanctuary and seeing the fortress brought it all back. She had to break down at some point, because of it all. And the unknown about her sisters.

Others have feelings too.