STOP
by Nicki Benson On a really bad day I’ll pick up a newspaper and find that all the full stops are missing from the text. |
The message never changes.
A child will start misbehaving, and its mother will shout ‘stop it!’
If I overhear a conversation in a café or on a train it’ll be filled with expressions such as ‘stop right there’ or ‘what’s the next stop?’ or ‘I wonder if it’ll stop raining soon’ or any number of similar phrases.
Each time I go out someone will ask me for directions to the nearest bus stop.
When I turn on the radio the song that’s playing will be ‘Stop Stop Stop’ or ‘Stop! In The name of Love’ or ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’.
On a really bad day I’ll pick up a newspaper and find that all the full stops are missing from the text.
Something else never changes: the girl I see whenever I look into a mirror.
I’m getting used to her now, of course. And my personality has adapted to my reflection: I never leave the apartment unless I’m in full make-up; I spend whole afternoons shopping for shoes; I’m house-proud and careful with money; I watch my weight; I feel my eyes mist over at a sentimental scene in a movie or on TV.
It’s all softening me up for the ordeal I know I’ll have to suffer before I can move on.
And afterwards?
That isn’t for me to decide. But I’ll still be female. The memories will be more visceral that way — and when all’s said and done they’ll be my real punishment.
Because I got off too easily before. They left me wearing my trouser belt, and I don’t think it was an oversight. If that was a more damning indictment than any court of law could have thrust upon me, it was also a means of avoiding a life where I’d never be able to look a single member of my family in the eye again.
Whatever happens, the last words I heard before the key turned in the lock will always stay with me.
“Protest all you like, son, but that’s what you’re going to be charged with. If she says stop, you stop.”
Comments
STOP by Nicki Benson
has me asking exactly what happened and her view point. I do not question his guilt, but ask for clarification.
May Your Light Forever Shine
He's In Purgatory
He's in purgatory. He took his own life in the police cell rather than face the stigma of spending the rest of his days as a convicted rapist. He's now learning that suicide may not have been the easy way out he thought it was.
What an outstanding little
What an outstanding little piece you've written. In your economy of words you've said more about who and what we all are than any thousand page novel. As for further writings...don't STOP!!!
May Your Words Flow Like a River to the Sea...
Kelly
Thanks Kelly
Thanks Kelly
I don't know whether it did all that, but I hope it raised one or two questions.
I got the idea from the Guardian 'Comment Is Free' site around the time of the allegations made against Julian Assange. Someone suggested that if a woman initially consents to sex and then changes her mind, the charge should be called something other than rape. The first reply I read was stinging.
'No, rape will do. When she says stop, you stop."
Who else could write it?
Nicki,
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. They lie.
We understand his crime. We understand his guilt. We understand his shame. We understand his punishment. And we are allowed to see that he has hope for redemption. And last, but not least, we know that, even with redemption, there will always be profound regret.
Not bad for 350 words.
will there be a follow up?
will there be a follow up?