"I don't know how parents survive!" she exclaimed. "You've been with me for what — five or six weeks now, and I feel like I'm either going to have gray hair or a heart attack or both! And the thing is, you're just skipping along, tra la la, and — oh! I'm a girl! oh! I have a boyfriend! oh! I climbed the school building! oh! I have breasts!"

The ride to the doctor's was not the most comfortable conversation I've ever had. I wanted to ask questions, but knew I should keep quiet. The saying "bite your tongue" came to mind, so I literally clamped my teeth on my tongue to remember not to talk.

Aunt Jane, on the other hand, just let herself go.

"I don't know how parents survive!" she exclaimed. "You've been with me for what — five or six weeks now, and the whole time I feel like I'm either going to have gray hair or a heart attack or both! And the thing is, you're just skipping along, tra la la, and — oh! I'm a girl! oh! I have a boyfriend! oh! I climbed the school building! oh! I have breasts!

"And every time you convince me that it's not some stunt you pulled, but just 'the way things happened'. Well, that train has stopped. That flag will not fly any more! You did this on purpose. You knew what you were doing. You knew what was happening, and you hid it so no one would stop you."

I sat in silence, and put the tip of my tongue back between my teeth to remind me not to talk.

"Am I right?" Aunt Jane demanded.

"Yes," I replied in a small voice.

"What?" she said loudly. "I didn't hear you."

"Yes, you're right," I said.

"I don't believe this bull-hinky story about a magical tea, by the way. I don't want to hear it. I'm taking you to a pediatric endocrinologist, and he will tell me what you've been up to. And then I want to know where you got the pills from."

"I didn't take any pills," I said, in spite of my determination not to speak. I wanted to ask what an engocryologist was, but went back to biting my tongue.

Jane didn't say anything for a while, but then, in a softer tone, she told me, "I want to believe you, but it's practically impossible, in the first place, for breasts to grow that quickly, with or without chemical help. And if there really was a tea that gave results like that, girls all over the world would be drinking it. Something happened to you, and even if it is the tea like you say, you still need to see a doctor. In spite of everything, you really are a boy, which is something you seem to forget."

At the hospital Jane led me through a maze of back hallways and stairs until we ended up in the employee clinic. A doctor was sitting in a chair, waiting for us. Aunt Jane fell all over herself thanking him for his time.

He said, "It's okay. I had a couple kids I had to see anyway." He was a fairly young, good-looking guy with light brown hair. He was wearing a white coat and had a stethoscope around his neck. He smiled at me, introduced himself as Dr. Monroe and shook my hand.

I liked the feeling of his strong, rough hand. I thought, If I were a girl, I'd have such a crush... but this was no time for thoughts like that. As he led me into an exam room, Aunt Jane insisted on coming with us.

He had me lift up my shirt and open my bra. I felt pretty embarrassed as he looked at my breasts and felt them. He also felt in my armpits for some reason, and then told me I could get dressed again.

"I don't understand why you wanted me to see Marcie. Rapid growth is unusual — I mean, it's rare, but not unprecedented. And you don't mind, do you?" With a smile, he directed the last question at me, and smiling I shook my head no.

"The problem is," Jane said slowly, "that this is a boy here."

"No," the doctor said.

"Yes," Jane insisted.

The doctor smiled. "Is this a joke? Did Hughie put you up to this?"

In the end, the doctor had a to do a more thorough exam to be convinced, and then his manner changed. He asked whether I was "transitioning", whether I was under a doctor's care, and whether I was taking any hormones. Jane answered all the questions except the last.

"I'm not taking any hormones," I said. "I'm not taking any kind of pills or shots or anything like that."

Luckily, the doctor seemed to believe me. Also, he wasn't upset or worried, which made me feel better. He commented, "Boys sometimes have breast growth at the onset of puberty. It isn't harmful. Once their testosterone starts going, the growth reverses."

"This much growth?" Jane asked.

"Well, no," he admitted. "I'm afraid that if you want to reverse this situation, you'd need to undergo, uh, breast reduction. But — based on Marcie's presentation, demeanor, dress — I'm guessing that this is a welcome change. Am I right?"

I nodded again.

"Have you talked to your therapist or doctor about hormone suppression?" I shook my head no. Jane sighed.

"What the hell is causing this?" she demanded. "You don't seem overly concerned."

"No, I'm not overly concerned," he said. "Things like this happen! Usually the problem is how to get rid of them. If Marcie likes them and wants them and her parents don't mind, then I don't see any cause for concern.

"I do want to do some bloodwork," he said, "I'll write up the order, and you can have it drawn right now. Once the results come in, I'd like to see Marcie in my office."

He handed Aunt Jane a card. "Call on Monday and make an appointment for two weeks from now. And get a referral from her therapist. We all need to be on the same page."

Jane insisted, "Aren't you afraid that she's taking hormones?"

"Honestly — just a gut feeling — I don't get that impression, and she says she isn't. Do you have any reason to think she is? I mean, aside from the breasts?"

"What do you mean 'aside from the breasts'? That's why I think so."

"Hmm," the doctor commented. "Puberty is a fairly malleable state. A lot of things can happen before the body settles down. Admittedly, this is a pretty extreme case, but boys do grow breasts. It happens." To me he asked, "Are you using a shampoo or body wash with lavender or tea tree oil in it?"

I shook my head no and asked why.

"Lavender oil and tea tree oil have been known to provoke breast growth in boys. Again, once the boy switches to a different product, testosterone gets the upper hand, and the breast growth reverses."

Jane pulled the brown paper bag from her purse and asked, "Do you know anything about this tea?"

The doctor took a sniff and chuckled. "Oh, yeah, I've seen this stuff before. It's harmless. Girls drink it and hope it will make their breasts start growing, but it has no effect. They drink it, and what was going to happen anyway starts happening, and they think the tea did it. It's just some herbs — wild yam, fennel, some other stuff. Like I said, it's harmless."

"Can I keep drinking it?" I asked.

"If you like it," he said. "Drink all you want. It's not going to do anything for you either way."

Jane and the doctor talked a bit more, and by the end of their conversation, she was a lot calmer.

I liked the doctor, and I had already decided a couple of things:

1. The tea had made my breasts grow,
2. I was definitely going to keep drinking the tea,
3. I was going to get shampoo and body wash with lavender and tea tree oil.

The blood tests didn't hurt. I had to look away so I wouldn't see the needle, but the woman who did it was good and fast.

When she was done, she asked, "Are you too big for a lollipop, hon?" When I smiled and shook my head no, she gave me a red one.

"How about you, mom?" she asked Aunt Jane, who sighed, then smiled, and took a green one.

As we drove away, Aunt Jane said, "I don't how I'm going to explain this to your parents. The doctor seems to think it's just happening by itself, but your parents are going to flip right out. I'll try to keep them calm, but I'm sorry, Marcie, they might want to pull you out of here." She looked at me. I smiled at her, and she shook her head.

"I don't know how you can be so calm about this. It's a big deal. I mean, you realize that if you want to go back to being a boy, it's going to be difficult. You might need more than a breast reduction."

She took her lollipop out of her mouth and said, "You manage to get into the craziest situations!" She sucked on the lollipop, thinking.

"I guess it would be worse if you didn't want to be a girl and had those things pop out of you, but still..." She didn't finish the thought. She just sighed.

"Hey," she said, "I haven't even had breakfast yet. Are you hungry?" I was. So, we went to a diner, where she had breakfast and I had lunch.

Then she drove home and went to bed, saying she'd call my parents when she woke up.

I walked over to Alice's house, filled her in on what happened, and made myself a cup of tea.