"Come here, you little Dodger girl! You know I love you, don't you? I'm not getting rid of you! I just don't have to be your mother any more! Let's face it, you're like a little soap opera — with breasts!" She laughed and laughed at her own joke.

Rules Are Rules
39. A Little Soap Opera - With Breasts!
copyright © 2006, 2007 Kaleigh Way; All Rights Reserved

 

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Part 39
 
Jerry got his Giants shirt and put it on, and the two of us wandered through the mall aimlessly. For some reason we were both a little tired, and he had his arm around me while I leaned into him, sort of nuzzling my head against his chest.

I was turning my face, pressing my head against him, when a flash went off, followed quickly by several others.

"Sorry," the man with the camera said, "but it was too beautiful to miss." He introduced himself as a newspaper photographer. "If that picture comes out the way I saw it, we could all be famous. Both of you are really photogenic, has anybody told you that?"

He followed that with a stream of flattery, telling us what a nice couple we made. He talked about my cheekbones and Jerry's shoulders, and so on. He asked about the t-shirts.

Jerry gave him a slightly inaccurate version of what happened: He made his purchase of a Giants t-shirt seem like a Solomonic inspiration. In the end, the man asked our permission to use the photo, and then he disappeared.

After that, we went to a bookstore. Jerry needed a copy of Moby Dick for English class.

While I waited, I looked through the girls magazines. I wanted to get one, but couldn't make up my mind. How was I supposed to choose one? Maybe I should pick by the woman on the cover — go for the one I'd most want to be? Was that the way to decide? Maybe I should go with the article titles that interest me... No, that didn't help much either.

I wondered whether Eden had any thoughts on the subject, or whether Cassie would answer me seriously if I asked her. Knowing Cassie, she might steer me the wrong way just for a laugh.

Jerry walked up to me with his purchase in his hand. "Hey, Jerry," I said. "Which of these magazines does Cassie read? Does she read any of them?"

"Oh, pull-eez," he said. "Can we go? Haven't I suffered through enough girly stuff for one day?"

"I don't know," I replied. "Have you? Seriously, come on: you must have noticed the names of the magazines Cassie reads."

He looked at me and shook his head. "You're lucky you're so incredibly cute," he said. I blushed a little and smiled. "Come here," he whispered. He put his arms around me and we started kissing each other as if we were trying to make up for years of being apart.

A man cleared his throat behind me. He did it again, a little louder. Then he said, "Could you two please take that outside? Outside the mall?"

"Sorry," I said, and we left the store.

We wandered around a little longer until it was time to rendezvous with Mrs. Auburn and Nina.

As we approached, Jerry's mother's eyes twinkled. "Are you a Dodger fan, Marcie?" she asked.

"Let it go, ma, let it go!" Jerry cautioned.

"Now I know why you had your coat zipped up earlier," she commented. "You wanted to surprise Jerry."

I grinned at her. "I just liked the colors. I didn't even know it said 'Dodgers' until Jerry pointed it out."

"Jerry HATES the Dodgers!" Nina informed me.

"But he likes Marcie, right, Jerry?" his mother teased.

"We have an agreement," Jerry informed us, in a very serious tone. "If she wears that... shirt, I will wear this one, just so the facts are clear."

"Yes," his mother said, smiling, "We have to make sure the facts are clear."

I had a hard time to keep from laughing. Nina burst out with a laugh, but I don't think she knew what she was laughing at. I gave her a hug.

 

~*~
 

When I got home, Aunt Jane was awake and smiling. She'd worked the third shift last night. "Good morning/afternoon! Hello there! I didn't know you were a Dodger fan."

"I'm not," I said. "I just got it for the colors."

She laughed.

"You're in a good mood," I observed.

"Yes, I am!" she chortled. "And do you know why? Because I am done being in loco parentis with you."

"What do you mean?" I asked, a little alarmed. I don't know Latin, but I could figure that out — it meant she wasn't going to be acting as my parent any more.

"I mean that your mother is coming!" she said. "It turns out that your parents found a house that they like."

The color drained from my face. "Does that mean I'm moving?"

"No, silly!" she said. "Well, not right away! Your parents made an offer on the house, and it was accepted. Now they have to wait for the closing. That takes at least a month, usually longer. I'm thinking end of November, early December. You might even make it to the end of the semester before everything is settled.

"Anyway, in the meantime, your mother is coming out here so she can keep an eye on you! I mean, both eyes!"

Aunt Jane was crowing with glee, but when she saw the glum look on my face, she grabbed me and hugged me. "Come here, you little Dodger girl! You know I love you, don't you? I'm not getting rid of you! I just don't have to be your mother any more! Let's face it, you're like a little soap opera — with breasts!" She laughed and laughed at her own joke.

I didn't think it was very funny, but her silliness made me laugh anyway.

"Call your mother," Jane told me. "She'll explain everything." Then she turned a critical eye on my shirt. "Then you and me — I have to take you bra shopping. You've outgrown that one by a long shot."

 

~*~
 

My mother didn't really explain anything. She zipped through a bunch of real-estate lingo that I didn't understand, quickly brushing the subject out of the way.

What she really wanted to talk about was my breasts. She wanted to know how big they were. She was shocked when I told her I was almost as big as Eden, so I tried to backpedal. She wanted my measurements, but I didn't know them. "Call me back when you know your bra size," she said. "In fact, take all your measurements. Get your aunt to do it. I want to know the numbers."

"Aunt Jane is taking me shopping for bras as soon as I hang up," I told her.

"It's not for that!" she exclaimed. "I want to know exactly how big those things are! Look, I don't know how you can be so blase about this. It isn't every day that a boy sprouts a pair of breasts from one day to the next. What are you going to do when you go back to being Mark? You are going to go back to being Mark, aren't you? I hope you understand that this is a big deal — a very big deal — but you're acting like it's nothing out of the ordinary!"

"I guess I like it," I told her.

"Oh, Lord," she said. "It's a good thing I'm going to be out there soon."

"When are you coming?"

"Tuesday morning. I'm taking a red-eye flight, so I'll be there before breakfast. Your aunt has all the details. If it's any consolation, you'll get to skip school so you can come and get me."

"Great!"

 

~*~
 

After I hung up, I became aware that I had a stomach ache. I know it sounds weird to say it that way, but I suddenly realized that my stomach had been hurting for a while, and I wasn't sure when it started. Could there have been something wrong with the ice cream I ate?

"What's the matter?" Aunt Jane asked me. "What's that face about?"

"My stomach hurts," I told her.

"Probably just nerves," she smiled. "You're worried that your mother is going to cramp your wild Marcie style." She laughed.

I tried to smile, but my stomach hurt too much.

Aunt Jane took me back to the mall to shop for bras. We bought three, and Jane did pretty much all the work. She even helped me try them on.

"What's with you?" she asked. "Does your stomach really hurt that much?"

"Yes," I said. "Maybe I have the flu or something."

"Maybe you just need to go to the bathroom," Jane replied. "Have you gone yet today? But it's probably just nerves, like I said before. You'd be surprised how many people come to the emergency room for that."

"Do they really?" I asked.

"No," she admitted. "It sounded good though, didn't it? Seriously, nerves can tie your stomach in a painful knot. Still, if you think you're going to throw up, tell me so I can pull over, okay?"

"I won't," I said, and bent over, with both hands on my belly.

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To Be Continued...