Some of you here knew that I was a Muslim of the non-bomb making sect, until January of this year, and had adopted the first name of Khadijah in honor of Muhammad's first wife.
People here in Portland seemed to assume that I would revert back to my given name of Gwen when I returned to Christianity, and I indeed did try very hard to do so. However, there are so many harsh memories associated with my given name that I have decided to return to using Khadijah as my first name and plan to legally change it both in the State of Oregon but also the State of California on my birth certificate when I correct a mistake on it.
I doubt that I will change my Author name here at BCTS, and in fact, will likely retain that name on any of my publicly published work.
Much peace
Khadijah
Comments
Doing good
Its your name and you like it so no one else should complain. I truly believe names have no religious sect its our personal choice of what religion we want to be
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.
Gwen to Khadijah
You are a much loved member, here.
May Your Light Forever Shine
Thank you for your kind and generous comment.
Quite a few members here have expressed similar sentiments and I have lacked the grace to say thank you, or even acknowledge their kindness. It is an inexcusable fault but not one without remedy and I promise to do my utmost to do so.
Khadijah
Dear Gwinn/Gwen/Khadijah
You know...I love you and always wish you the best. I think it's excellent that you are living the best time of your life.
The only thing is, and , of course its just my opinion.... I think you are an extremist! I think wanting to be a chained sex slave is extreme, something more moderate and probably more satisfying would be to get married or live with someone. Next, you could just pick up men and only be with them a short time; that seems less satisfying, but more exciting.
With your religion: You go from being an extreme right wing Christian, which bit you in the ass. All the prejudice and intolerant you taught your kids; they used against you. Next you became a Muslim, I don't know how conservative or liberal, but you didn't become a modern American wimyn Muslin, you wore your "nun" outfit and hung out with traditional middle Easterners, where much of their rules and behavior are from tribal custom and not the teachings of Mohammed. That's not especially bad; it just reminds me of the ultra-orthodox Jews, it's just a large switch from your previous religion. Now, it seems you are interested in the Mormons/CoJCoLDS. Another authoritarian, patriarchal religion. You know, probably most Mormons don't think too highly of Muslims, or blacks or independent, childless wimyn. Not you though, I meant hard driving career wimyn, like my ex. I mean, what's next? Are going to become an orthodox Jew?
With your name: I think going from Gwen to Khadijah is extreme for a non-Muslim, non-foreign American. It's really fine with me, but are you going to be Gwen around the Mormons and Khadj in the rest of your life? Maybe Mormons in your more liberal part of the country are different than the older, semi-farmer descendants of Mormon pioneers that settled in this area. Kim boards her horses at a very nice mormon grandfather type's lot about 4 miles away in South Tempe. The thing is, the cul de sac they are in is all well-off Mormons; we get to see how they act. They seem quite clannish. I think Mesa AZ, which is next to Tempe, has one of the first Temples not in Utah.
I keep thinking you are going to get yourself in trouble, but you never do, I guess. Still, I think you are quite a character! I, OTOH, am a social phobic with Asperger's, genetic depression and a bit crazy. You function much better than I do!
Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee
I am NOT an extremist ...
Oh, well maybe just a little, MAYBE. It's my damnable high need for order thing ya know; brought up in chaos and all that eh?
Not that I really want to get into a big Mormon bashing thing... But if I could just say that they have been extremely kind to me, beyond anything that I could expect. AND, there is a movement from within to begin addressing the GBLT issue in a more intelligent way, but it will be slow. I was going to discontinue it with them but two sisters came to me and asked me to continue on for the reason that they saw me as a bridge. One of the sisters has a brother who is gay, and the other has a sister who is lesbian. The sisters told me that the leadership had never encountered someone like me and I should continue on, questing from within.
As far as their "present" treatment of women, we are treated like princesses. And, not one single person has questioned my present presentation, something I never got from the Muslims or those of the plastic Jesus.
And the LDS insist that I not attack or say bad things about any other religion. I have gotten nothing but love from them at every step, even when I was acting irrational from pain a few weeks ago.
I've heard dozens of horror stories about them from inactive members and all I can say is that I hope change is coming and I want to be part of the fight.
Much Peace
Khadijah
I too have felt included by
I too have felt included by the LDS despite preconceptions.
Change is hard but it does happen, and I believe we will be seeing positive "realignment of thought" in the next few years from this quarter.
PM me if you want - I'm also in Portland area and LDS.
Kathy
Faith
I'd imagine that in many different faiths there are pockets of followers who may have a substantially different profile of beliefs to the official line - it's probably more noticable in Christianity as (a) it's the biggest faith on the planet and (b) most denominations conduct business in the vernacular. Quite often, the official line will be very conservative and sometimes even literalistic (i.e. claiming that everything in the Bible literally happened, with convoluted theories to explain discrepancies between different authors describing the same events). Just because that's the official line, it doesn't necessarily follow that all the followers of that denomination believe likewise.
Then of course, even among different congregations that believe more-or-less the same, there'll be differences in how the congregation functions as a community, their approach to geographic outsiders, their approach to lifestyle outsiders, the length / structure / organisation etc. of services, the style of services, the messages delivered by the current priest in sermons / homilies / talks (I've experienced several of the "Pray more or pay more" ilk, as well as several giving face-value interpretations of stories / events).
I'd say that is sounds as though to you, the label a particular congregation wear or faith they express doesn't matter so much as how much of a community they are and their approach to geographic / lifestyle outsiders / societal outcasts. After all, the Biblical accounts do suggest that Jesus spent a lot of time hanging out with his society's outcasts (much to the disgust of the religious hierarchy of the day) and railing against those with over-zealous interpretations of what he believed were the key rules Moses encouraged his community to follow a couple of millennia previously.
In addition, I think one of your reasons for adopting your current name was to put some distance between your present self and the name given to you at birth (Gwen being too similar sounding for comfort). So try to follow the lesson of your attempt at reverting back to Gwen - have the strength to try to be who you are, and not try to mould yourself into a form that's more acceptable to society but not who you are.
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Dear Gwen,
I hear the same thing about LDS, and from the kids. Kim has a very smart, active 14 YO LDS chicana helping her with her horses.
I'm very glad that you are treated so well. I'm really happy for you and I hope everything continues to be great!
Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee
A rose by any other name,
would still be my close, dear, trusted friend. Whatever name you choose to refer to yourself is Jake with me.
Rock on girl!
Cathy
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.