by Beth Williams
Intro:
My mind is clearer now
As I come to the end, all pretence has been stripped of me
If you take away, what once was thought whole
There is none for the world left to see...
Jesus!!
One:
Oh, Lord you know I believe in You
I know that You're the Son of God
And what the Bible says is true!
But all the things I've done
Have been swept away
I'm naked and I'm hurting Lord and I don't know what to pray...
Two:
Listen, Jesus I don't like what I see
All that I'd ask is that you'd listen to me
Please remember, I've tried to be your MAN for oh so long
But everything I do today
Gets twisted round in some strange way...
And it hurts me so to think I'm wrong
Three:
I remember when all of this began
No cloud of doubt then I knew I was Your man
Please believe me my love and adoration hasn't died
But now my heart is torn and tired
I still confess you are Messiah.
But Pretending to be a man is oh so wrong.
Bridge:
Oh Lord you know this battered one
Was always different so alone
Not at all man inside
It was all a lie!
Preaching teaching touching loving souls
Watching while Your Will unfolds
Speaking bold and loving You
It was so good.
Four:
I've tried for years and now I've almost died
I'm a woman not a man deep inside.
I've been the mommy but now my babies they won't talk to me...
I have loved and now I've lost
My heart can't cover the cost
Oh Lord what's to become of me?
Five:
Listen, Jesus do you care for me still?
Speak to me Lord, and I will do Your Will!
But my life's a joke; I'm falling to pieces before my eyes
I'm your follower but I'm blind
Always a woman deep inside
My life was beautiful but now it's sour...
Yes it's all gone sour
Oh it's all so sour...
Listen, Jesus it's all gone sour.
Lyrics: Heaven On My Mind
Based on: Heaven on their Minds from the Musical Jesus Christ Superstar
by Timothy Rice and Andrew Lloyd Weber, 1972
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zB8wNjmHwRc
Comments
Twins...
...so alike and so different; our paths converge frequently and diverge from time to time, but we share the same faith and many of the same hopes and dreams. This touches my heart in a way that few works of creation can. Thank you for blessing me this day.
Dio vi benedica tutti
Con grande amore e di affetto
Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
Beth,
ALISON
'I know your prayers will be answered.Remember 'Drea's poem,"A Right of Passage"and the last stanza says
"and now,my once blind eyes do see,
that I am her,
and she is me".You are Beth!!
ALISON
"Listen, Jesus do you care for me still?"
I've prayed that too, sweetie. But not long ago God gave me a vision of His acceptance of me as His daughter. I pray He will do the same for you.
"Treat everyone you meet as though they had a sign on them that said "Fragile, under construction"
dorothycolleen
Raw!
Unanwered prayer = rejection? It feels like that when you want to be accepted and all around you don't. And a God who doesn't speak? Maybe he speaks through Alison or Dorothy or Andrea or Stan, huh? Damn this is good!
Heaven on My Mind
Beth, I hope and pray that this song is a reflection of a ppast experience and that you now see yourself as the beautiful waman that you are.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
This one speaks to my heart -- and breaks it
Beth,
I read this yesterday and could not write, I was crying too hard. I wish I could take away the pain. Unfortunately it gets worse before it gets better.
"I've been the mommy but now my babies they won't talk to me..."
I have 3 boys. None of them talk to me - unless they want something from me. That's an improvement. Up till 2 years ago the only thing they had to say was hurtful and laced with profanities.
The pain you are going through is not unique to Christians, but the added dimension of knowing God can intervene but doesn't is a heartbreaker. The only encouragement I can give is that God is outside space and time, with a wisdom we don't understand. That being so, I know that God will provide a way through, but it might not be what I expect. Our response is called faith, but I expect you knew that already.
You are in my prayers,
Evie
He does his will; speaking to us, or not.
Most of the time, God does what he does without speaking to me; perhaps I was not listening? Trying to learn from what ever happens, and to do so without anger or bitterness is a challenge.
Sometimes I wonder? Do we just think that God is not talking to us or are we not willing to listen to the answer?
Much peace
Khadijah
"Listen, Jesus it's all gone sour."
Yeh. Been there. still struggling with it sometimes. Thanks for sharing this.