Simply Irresistible
By Jezzi Belle Stewart (c)2001

It was a cheap carnival, the kind you expect to find in the parking lot
of the Piggly Wiggly. In on Friday; out on Sunday. Sitting on a decrepit bench on the midway, Steve could see the trash all around - candy wrappers, drink cups, a
few religious brochures, and, looking directly down, a used condom.

*Not Great America.* he thought, as he brushed specks of the bench’s peeling faded green paint from his jeans.

Tinny music came from the cracked speakers under the Tilt-A-Whirl across the way. Looking at the chipped and faded paint, marred here and there by rust spots, Steve, who fancied himself a poetic soul at times, likened it to a pathetic attempt at a song of seduction sung by a wrinkled whore, long past her prime.

*A whore,* he thought dejectedly. *That's what I'll have to find.*

He had tried all of his own lines on the girls here, and then the ones his
friends swore always worked. He'd even tried Joey's "How YOU doin'?" that
always worked on “Friends”. Nothing. Zero, zip, nada. He had thought that
maybe the carnival atmosphere might make the girls more receptive to his
charms, but that had not been the case. Like every other Saturday night
since puberty, Steve found himself womanless. Women found his charms, his
lines, his deodorant and aftershave, in fact every thing about him, eminently
resistible. Even Fat Ginny, who, rumor had it, slept with ANYONE, had turned
him down with the old "Let's just be friends." line.

Steve looked at the brass covered ashtray in his hand. Funny, he didn't
remember winning it at any of the concession booths. In fact, he didn't
remember much of anything since the cute redhead, his ninth pickup attempt, had told him to go into Myrtle the Mystic's tent to "Get a future!"

*Wow* he thought; *I must have really tied one on at the beer tent after that!*

Without thinking, he began to rub the ashtray on the leg of his jeans.
Smoke exploded from the ashtray, knocking him over onto his side on the
bench. When he was able to right himself and look, there was a female genie
standing in front of him; she looked remarkably like Barbara Eden.

She stood there in her cute harem outfit with her arms crossed in front
of her breasts, and all Steve could think of was *Watch out Major Nelson,
wherever you are!*

"Are you ready for your third and last wish, Steve?" She asked.

Steve looked at the genie and said, "Uh, pardon me, ma'am (His mother
had raised him to always be polite, even in impossible situations.), how do
you know me, and how can I be getting a third wish when I haven't had a first
or second wish yet?"

"Call me Barbara" she said, seating herself next to him. "We met
earlier. You have had two wishes already, dear, but your second wish was for
me to put everything back the way it was before you made your first wish.
Thus, you remember nothing, because everything is the way it was before you
made any wishes. I'm sorry, hon, but you really do now have only one wish
left."

That was a little confusing, but Steve brushed the confusion aside; with
a cute harem girl sitting close to him, he knew exactly what he wanted.
Forgetting the things that usually happened to Majors Nelson and Healey, he
said, "Okay, I don't believe this, but what the heck! Barbara, I wish I was
irresistible to women."

"Are you sure, dear?" asked Barbara. And then, as if reluctantly
obeying a rule, "I must tell you that that was your first wish, too."

Since his arm was brushing Barbara's breast and her thigh was rubbing
his, any warning Steve might have derived from her hesitancy in uttering that
last sentence was totally lost. "Sure, I'm sure" said Steve, imagining
himself as very Heffneresque in a silk smoking robe surrounded by scads of
beautiful women, all of them of bunny proportions and all of them eager to please!

A big smile lit up Barbara's face. "Oh, I'm so happy to hear you wish
that Stephie, and this time there won't be any more nasty wishes to get in
the way!"

*Stephie?* was Steve's last thought as the cloud of pink smoke that
enveloped a disappearing Barbara enveloped him, too.

---

Steve's thoughts were fuzzy - it seemed like every place there should
have been a word of two syllables or more there was only a mental blank - but
he knew what he felt; his bottom felt funny. Funny bad! She - *She?!?* -
wanted to complain, but all that she seemed to be able to do was start
whimpering. She looked up at the huge female face coming down closer to her,
and instinctively reached out to the woman. "Moooommy!"

A smiling Barbara picked up her brand new daughter. She had always
wanted a daughter, something usually denied to a female member of the Jinn, and now, thanks to Steve's last wish, she had one. She looked at the cute little baby
girl in her arms: Blonde hair in ringlets, blue eyes and tiny upturned nose,
cute pink lacy party dress short enough to show pink ruffley rubber panties,
the panties obviously filled with a now very, very wet diaper.

"Shhhhhhh, Stephie." she whispered. "I'm going to make the best mommy for
you ever! No pesky other wishes to get in the way this time. We are going to
have such a good life together, you and I."

Changing her mood, Stephie gurgled happily. Steve, locked inside, cried.

Barbara's genie-girlfriends gathered around her, happy for her. "Isn't she
adorable?" one said.

The others nodded, replying, "Simply irresistible!"

END