You want olives with that?
by Donna Lamb
"It's supposed to be three wishes," said Tom.
"One wish," the naked djinni insisted. He'd come out of the bottle they'd found nude, except for a sort of jacket and some jewelry, and the three friends tried very hard to ignore the massive evidence of the mystical being's masculinity.
"Now I know why in movies, genies are usually wearing pants or smoke from the waist down," Harry said in an aside to his buddies. "How come in all the stories it's three wishes?" he asked.
"Yeah, and there are three of us, we should each get a wish," said Dick.
"One wish," repeated the man-like creature. "There's only one of me and there's only one wish. And you all three must agree on the wish since you are each separately and together responsible for releasing me from my prison."
"Crap," said Tom.
"Hey, one third of a wish is better than none," said Harry.
"Right," said Dick. "And maybe we can phrase the wish so we each get what we want."
"Hmm," said Tom. One effect of the djinni's nakedness was that they were all thinking of sex now.
"I want a smart, beautiful woman who loves me and loves to make love and is rich enough that neither of us has to work for a living if we don't want to," said Harry.
"Wait, you didn't include that you're together and can stay that way," said Dick.
"Yeah, and make sure you're both healthy and will live a long time together," said Tom. "And heck, why settle for just one woman? Wish for two who are best friends and love each other as much as they love you."
"Yow, hot," said Harry, waggling a hand as if burned.
"That sounds like a really good wish," said Dick. "Let's see if we can make it better. Does everyone want a version of this wish?"
"Can't think of anything better, the genie said we can't make a Miss-America-style World Peace wish, it has to be something for ourselves," said Tom.
"Okay, okay, so how about we phrase it like this...." Harry began.
They worked on the wish for several hours, phrasing it carefully, trying to get as much out of it as they could. The djinni had warned them that a short wish was better than a long wish because it had less that could go wrong.
The djinni watched and listened, showing no emotion at all. They asked him a few questions and sometimes he answered them and sometimes he didn't.
Finally, Tom told him the version of the wish they had worked out without formally making the wish. "What do you think?"
"I think," said the djinni, "that that may be the wisest wish I have ever been asked to grant. You have only left out asking for happiness, and that is not always wise."
"We figured," said Harry.
"So gentlemen, is that your wish?"
"Yes, it is," said Dick.
"Then repeat it, each of you say part of it separately, then together swear that the whole thing is your wish."
Tom began, "We wish, each separately and together, that each of us had two beautiful, rich, healthy women companions who loved us and loved each other and loved sex with both men and women...."
Later, Mr. D.J. Martini smiled to himself as he rode the elevator up to his penthouse suite where Tammie, Haylie and Connie, his three rich, healthy, beautiful companions who loved one another and loved sex waited for him. He decided he'd been really smart to save the other two wishes for himself. "Now what to do with the last wish?" he wondered.
Originally presented 2007-03-29.
Comments
And their off!
Adona,
you had to be first.
I just knew all three would end up sexy women. Didn't see that someone else had found the genie first and tricked Tom, Dick and Harry. Or is D J Martini the djinni?
Funny stuff, you're going down Adona.
John in Wauwatosa plotting his literary revenge.
John in Wauwatosa
Started this one when Erin announced the contest :smile:
Got another longer one I'm working on, too. :grin:
But as to the identity of the mystery wisher, well, you always need djinn to make a real martini. :lol:
Oh and thanks to Karen for the read and proof.
-- Donna Lamb, Flack
-- Donna Lamb, ex-Flack
Some of my books and stories are sold through DopplerPress to help support BigCloset. -- Donna
But I thought the idea was ...
... that something had to go wrong to qualify for the contest. It all seemed to work out perfectly as far as I can see ;)
Geoff
Very clever, Donna
And, as I've come to expect from you, very well written. Fun too!
Amelia
"Reading rots the mind." - Uncle Analdas
"Reading rots the mind." - Uncle Analdas
It's not fair!
I'm still trying to come up with an idea and Adonna is already posting completed stories? It's not fair I tell you! To make it worse its a cool story too! Wah!
Hugs!
grover
At least there are no pictures
Come on Grove...
Good thing she didn't post an image with this one like that, more than slightly obscene flower in “Pitcher Plantâ€.
Just admit it: We’ve been outmaneuvered by a master, or a mistress, or whatever…
Jamie
I did have a picture
Of a naked male djinni. :grin: But I decided not to use it for fear that it wouldn't be appreciated by a large part of the audience here. :lol:
Glad so many are liking the story.
-- Donna Lamb, Flack
-- Donna Lamb, ex-Flack
Some of my books and stories are sold through DopplerPress to help support BigCloset. -- Donna
One Wish
Mr. D.J. Martini sure must have enjoyed his wish as it has turned out so wonderfully for him. Wonder why he chose those particular three?
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
A joke and a bit of rules lawyering
You know the old joke on the djinni wishing:
And here's the fun thing - a good enough djinn would have been able to rapidly age his benefactor. So it's not like this is a good idea. NOW, I'd like everyone to gauge the following answer:
"I wish do die the death, the circumstances of which are not the consequence, of neither your action nor inaction, neither knowing nor unknowing, neither willing nor unwilling, neither directly nor by proxy."
How does it sound?
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
Faraway
Big Closet Top Shelf
Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!
How about...
"I wish to die in which the circumstances of my death are neither knowing nor unknowing, neither willing nor unwilling, neither directly nor by proxy." I'm pretty sure, someone would find a way to make this bad.
I don't think that being aged-up would defeat the death due to old age. After all, if a 20yo's body is aged to a 90yo's body fast, he's still only 20 years old, since he was born 20 years earlier.
-- Daphne Xu (a page of contents)
Originally presented...
...2007-03-29. Okay, that explains why I didn't recall a new contest being announced for this new month.
This was rather funny. It went without saying that they were going to become the others' girls. I'm wondering whether Mr. Martini was disguised as the Genie, or whether he used his first wish to give the second wish to the three men, and lure them into his clutches. I'm trying to decide whether the Genie was a "Literal Genie" or a "Jerkass Genie". Okay, I wouldn't make him a Jerkass Genie. It's not the worst thing to be in love and in a poly relationship. At least, they weren't turned into whores.
Would it be a Jerkass Genie, who grants the wish of someone for "a million bucks"?
How does one repost a story, keeping the comments, that was already posted, so that it gets on the front page again?
-- Daphne Xu (a page of contents)
I do this about once a week
I do this about once a week; pick an old story, usually a Solo and repost it to the front page. I do this by looking at the oldest stories on the site and picking one that I remember enjoying. Sephrena used to do it but since she stopped, I've taken up the project.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
Ahah
So this was one of the stories, and one that I noticed. I think that I vaguely recall finding a few old stories posted, but I didn't know what was going on.
-- Daphne Xu (a page of contents)
I thought I
had read this before.