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I sometimes wonder if I am actually making any progress, or if I am just going around in circles. I feel like a mental conjoined twin - one side is female, the other is male, but neither can really live without the other. After having my male side resurface, I am back to having sleepless nights and fevered prayers to finally be at peace. But I have patrolled the limits of my cage, and I simply do not see any exits. I went to a wiener roast at my church's pastor's new place yesterday, and one of the women there insisted that one day soon I would be sharing my story in public. But I don't see how that could possibly happen. Ah, well.
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It takes time
Dear Dorothy,
Changing as wide as you will do takes time. But remember that at the end of the tunnel you do have the "golden cup" awaiting. Those around you have the same problem to adjust to your (new) personality, but they do not clearly see the benefit of their doubts as you do. Just do not rush your own transition, that will only make you hurt more. DO enjoy the new horizons that will open for you.
You could try the methode that worked for me. I made the transition in several small steps using each week to do something new, while keeping the earlier weeks alive at the same time. Like week 1 Learn to use the silverware as women do, week 2 try to walk with the swinging hips in he way women do and so on. I made long lists of "to train" things. In this way the change was not too overwhelming but could become daily changes of habits.
There are a lot of other things I did in the same small-steps-way. Just drop me a line and I will get back to you with some other things that will fill your days.
Good luck on the way to your (new) personality!
Ginnie
GinnieG