Gateway to Life
-:Book 1:-
Through Death, Rebirth
by Faeriemage

Sometimes, it is what you do that matters. Sometimes, it is who you are. Usually it is just being in the proper place at the proper moment in time with the will to act.

Chapter 17:
What was lost, now is found

After all that we'd been through, to come home and have to deal with this. Most of the time people think nothing of someone fainting. They just collapse to the ground, right?

Sometimes we all forget that there are safer places to fall down than others. She was in the kitchen and hit her head on the counter as she fell. It opened up a gash on her scalp. All the power in the universe, and I couldn't stop this one action. I was going to collapse there, but Jams rushed over and put pressure on her Mom's head. She turned and looked at me.

"Call 911, Sis."

Her words spurred me to action and I ran over to the handset.

"911, what is the nature of your emergency?"

"My Mom fainted and hit her head on the counter."

"I show you at 493 Raintree Circle, is that correct?"

"Yes, please hurry. My sister is trying to stop the blood."

"Please stay on the line with me until the EMTs arrive."

I considered. for a moment, poping over to the 911 call center and scaring her a bit. She was so calm when all I wanted to do was scream. There was a nock on the door "Hargrave FD, we had a call about an emergency."

I dropped the phone and ran to the door. I had stared down two killers and a rapist. I had acted well and quickly, followed my training. . .

I let the men in as I continued to think about my actions. Training. I had been trained to fight, to evade, to overcome. Life had trained me. My dreams had reflected life. I was a warrior knight.

Jams really was my other half. She was the benevolent queen. She dreamed of helping people through her knowledge and compasion. She thought things through, and found resolutions. She was the leader, not me. I had thought I was the lead of this story, but I had always been wrong. I had been following Jams for my entire life, and the one moment that I actually recognized it I paniced and got us both captured and almost killed.

Even in our interactions, she had more of a name than I did. I was the Sister. She was Jams.

It was a flash of light in the darkness. I realized at that moment that I would follow her to the end of the world, and would use my sword and shield to protect her from the monsters in the darkness.

I came back to the world around me, and realized that Jams had been talking to me. "Are you alright, Sis?"

"I think so. I really think so."

"Girls, your mom is going to be alright. Head wounds tend to look worse than they are."

Mom was just stirring and looking around.

"What's your name?"

"I'm Helen Patriche."

"Do you know where you are?"

"I'm at home. What happened?"

"Mom!" We both said together. We rushed over and hugged her.

"Your girls found you collapsed in the kitchen. You seem to be ok now. If you'd like we can give you a ride into the hospital. If you decide not to come with us, I need you to sign a denial of consent form. If you do stay home, I suggest taking it easy for a couple of days, and contact your doctor at the first sign of light headedness."

"My girls. . .?"

"We found you Mommy. We were so worried."

"Yes, Mommy. We were worried."

She decided to take it in stride, and waited until the EMTs left to hug us to death. "I thought I'd lost you two. Why did you leave without telling me. I was so worried that something had happened to you. The police went out looking for you and your step-father, who was out on bail, was picked up again because we thought he might have done something."

She cried, and I was ashamed of my actions all over again. I had never thought of the consequences. Jams had organized a rebellion, and saved all of the lives of the people around her. I had done nothing but fail.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't ever have come. I'm sorry that I took Jams with me. I'll go somewhere else now."

Jams grabbed onto me like she could stop me by just holding on.

"Never leave me without permission."

I felt something change. I had been about to leave. I had planned to just head straight for the beast and have it out once and for all. Him and me. To the death of both of us.

I couldn't.

"What did you do?" I looked at her with wide eyes.

"Something that pains me. I prevented you from leaving, but in a small way I changed who you are."

"But why? I've brought you nothing but greif."

"You're the only reason I'm alive, Dummy. I would have been dead two weeks ago. You're the reason that I found someone who loves me. I had to return the favor."

The three of us sat there in the front room and cried. We'd collapsed there after the EMTs left.

We slowly calmed, and simply hugged on the floor. "Are you better now, Girls?"

"Yes, Mommy."

"Yep." I'm the one who made the short reply, "Mommy?"

"Yes, Jamie. . .ok, with two of you, I think that we need to give one a new name."

"Mommy, I think that she should be Jamie. I died, and so this is a new me, and should have a new name."

"Jams. . ."

"No, You deserve it. I've actually been thinking about this over the past week. When it was the two of us in one body, we could work it out. People were obviously talking to one of us, and we could both answer. It doesn't work any more."

"But. . ."

"No, I will change. I just can't decide on a good name."

"How about Olivia?" We both looked at Mom when she said that.

"If you'd been born a girl, we wouldn't have kalled you James, dear."

We looked at each other and laughed. Out of five alternates we had met, two of them genetically female, all had been James or Jamie. Tells you what assuming does.

We shared the joke with our Mom. She smiled at it. "So, do you like Olivia, dear?"

Jams, I mean Olivia nodded. I was going to have some difficulty with this, it seemed.

Something occured to me. Every other Jamie we had met had their name changed. Something bigger than me or even the few dimensions that I'd visited was going on.

I didn't have time to worry about it at the moment. We had come here with a purpose.

"Mommy, we need some cell phones so that we can keep in touch with you."

"Ok, sweetie, we can get you two cell phones."

"Um. . .we need seven."

"Jamie." She used her best strict Mom voice on me

"I need one, Olivia needs one, and each of Olivia's generals need a cell phone."

"My generals?"

"Of course, or did you think I missed you being called Queen?"

She blushed and pretty shade of red. It was fun yanking her chain.

She got a thoughtful expression on her face, "You know, Jamie, it's not going to work."

"Sure it will! I just need to make sure the opening stays open."

"And waste your energy on something meaningless? No, I have a better idea. We just need someone to alter the phones."

"That will cost money that we can't afford, and probably knowledge that the techs won't have."

"No, we just need Bree."

"Who's Bree?"

Olivia got up and kissed Mom. "We'll be right back. Would you mind taking us to Corin, Jamie?"

We popped over to Corin. I was beginning to wonder how we accomplished this without a pressure wave at our destination.

"Jams!"

"I'm Olivia now."

He looked at her quizically, but she continued, "Where's Bree?"

"In the common room."

She dragged me along behind her and we ran to the common room. Blue eyes. My mind completely locked up. There are eyes that are variations on the shade blue. They vary from what is called ice blue, to almost black blue. In that moment I realized that there was an arctypical blue that all the others had been preparing me for my entire life.

"I love you. . ." I only realized a moment later that I had spoken and I blushed crimson.

She kissed me. I melted.

I almost collapsed onto the floor I relaxed so much, but she held me up.

"You're Jamie, Aren't you. I'm Bree."

I looked at her face for the first time. "Brian. . .?"

"Brianna."

"Oh."

I had no idea what to think in that moment. I really needed a session with Mary. I loved a girl. I thought I was supposed to be a girl. I was confused.

Bree saw my look, and then she started to look uncomfortable. "I'm so sorry. I know it isn't right for girls to kiss like that, but when you said you loved me, in that moment, it was like I had been looking for you my entire life. . .I'll go." The happiness of a moment before went out of her face.

She thought of me as a girl. She wanted to kiss me when she thought I was a girl. Crap, she's getting away.

I ran over to her and grabbed her. "No, Bree, don't leave. You weren't wrong. I. . .I. . ." I couldn't think what to say that wouldn't be confused on it's way from my heart to my mouth by way of my brain. I kissed her. This time she melted.

She smiled at me when we broke it off that time. She hugged me and whispered in my ear, "I always knew there was someone out there who could accept me for who I am. Thank you."

We both cried some tears of joy.

"Ladies, would you mind paying attention to someone else for a moment?"

We both giggled at that and turned to Olivia.

"I'm going to stay here to start organizing the troops. Why don't you two go and get the cellphones with Mom. I'm sure she'll want to meet your new girlfriend, Jamie."

I blushed and Bree hugged me.

I moved the two of us to Mom. Bree was still hugging me.

"Hi, Mom."

"Hi, Jamie's Mom."

"Welcome back, Jamie. Who's this, and where's Olivia."

"This is Bree, Mom. Apparently she's the one I was supposed to pick up to help us with the cellphones."

"Yeah, we apparently fell for each other at first sight."

"Oh really. Aren't you two a little young for that?"

"Mom, I am fourteen."

She tried to look sternly at us, but I think it was too hard for her. She also knew the life I'd been through, and I think she might have thought that I deserved a little happiness now, even if there was a possibility it wouldn't last.

"Welcome, Bree. So, you can make cellphones work between worlds?"

"As long as I have some idea what I'm trying to do, then I can do anything with electronics."

"You look a little young to be an engineer."

"Well, you know that Jamie moves between worlds, and Jams can order people and they have to obey?"

"Olivia can make people obey her?"

"Her name is Olivia now? That's soooo pretty. Not as pretty as Jamie, though." She got a kiss for her efforts.

Mom looked sternly at us, and we both had the good grace to look abashed.

"While I accept your relationship, ladies, I expect you to try to curb yourselves, at least for the time being. I'll tell you both something my father told me when I started dating. Kissing and touching and. . .other things. . .are natural and make you feel good. They are also the easiest way to ruin a new relationship. Get to know each other first. Learn who you are together. The rest will grow from that, and be even more special when the time is right."

"How do Mom's get to be so wise?"

"By paying the consequences for wrong choices."

I remembered that my father wasn't my Mom's husband. I guess she might know the consequences for doing things wrong.

"So, can I expect you two to at least try to get to know each other first?"

"Yes, Mommy."

"Yes, Ma'am."

We stopped holding each other so tightly, but we still held hands, and we got a genuine smile from Mom.

"Bree, you can call me Helen, ok?"

"Ok, Helen."

Bree smiled.

"I need to take a look at a cellphone, and if possible, place a call to another dimension with it."

Well, to business. Mom handed me her phone, and I dialed Mary's number. "Hello, Helen?"

"No, It's Jamie. I'm handing the phone to Bree. She is trying to improve cross-dimensional communication."

"Hi, Mary. I'm Jamie's girlfriend, Bree. Can you talk to me so I can hear how the voice changes as I make modifications?"

She lisened for a few moments before turning to me and saying, "Done, and she wants to talk to you, Jamie."

"Hello?"

"Girlfriend? Does this change your mind about what you want to do?"

"She likes me for who I am."

"She knows about all of you?"

"Um, well, um . . .she sees me as a girl."

Bree looked at me a little strangely.

"Don't you think you had better tell her before we go on?"

"Um, well, probably."

"Jamie, I have seen you be truly decisive in the past, what's changed now?"

I couldn't tell her in front of Bree, I needed her to see me like this still. I couldn't loose this. I said nothing.

"Jamie, you need to tell her. Please. You can call me back when you are done."

She hung up, and I sat there for a moment holding a disconnected cellphone.

"Bree, I want to talk to you about something?"

"Are you breaking up with me already, Jamie?"

She looked like she was about to cry, and I couldn't help it and cried myself. "No, but you may not want me after I tell you."

We went up to Jamie. . .Olivia's room for some privacy.

"I was born a boy, Bree. I've known for a while I was really a girl, but physically I'm only just beginning to change into what I feel I am inside."

"Are you going to become a girl, then? Physically I mean?"

"Yes, I am."

"Ok, then everything's fine?"

"That simple? But, doesn't that change how you see me?"

"You look and act like a girl. You kiss like a girl. That's all that matters, Jamie."

I hugged her to me, and she hugged me back.

I called Mary on the phone, and while it was ringing, Bree walked out of the room and closed the door. I guess she wanted me to have some privacy.

"So, how did it go?" Mary was always really conversational with me when trying to open up. She would just start talking to me, and I would open up to her.

"It went better than I thought it would. She still likes me."

"I'm happy for you, Jamie!"

We talked for a while, and it felt good. We examined my feelings for Bree, and the fact that I still thought of myself as a girl. I realized when it ended that this was the first real therapy session I'd had with Mary in two weeks. I was used to talking to her every day or so.

I felt at peace.

I went downstairs where Mom and Bree were talking. "Are you ready to go, Jamie?"

"We don't have to buy all those cellphones!"

"What's up?"

"I can make them for us out of parts, and I'm going to make a base for us and put it in the back yard, and. . ."

Mom and I laughed, and the three of us went out to get the supplies that BRee needed.

It took us most of the afternoon to help her construct the headsets she wanted to use as the base. When we were done, we tested them by calling Mom and Mary at the same time. Four way calling, and the "cell tower" was in my back yard.

We gathered up the remaining headsets, I held Bree's hand, and she held mine. I latched onto Olivia. I let go of the world.