First, when passing you are playing tricks with peoples' minds. We decide male and female based on cues we have learned. You look at me and see broad shoulders, short hair, my face shape and your mind says 'male'. The trick is to provide more cues toward female and to cover up some of the male cues. You don't have to (and probably can't) cover all of the male cues, just shift the balance. For me, the right shape of pants or an A-line skirt creates an illusion of a shape that isn't really there. The right wig, dangly earrings, painted toenails, a cute purse - all are cues. It is the sum of those cues that cause people to say 'female' and look past the remaining male cues. And make sure that your attire and makeup is appropriate for where you are going and who you are. For me and the places I go as Alison, glam and eye liner is almost never appropriate.

The second point you may have heard before. I was hugely concerned with passing until I figured out that it doesn't matter to most people. Once I figured out that most people would accept me even after I was read, I stopped being so nervous and now am rarely read by people passing by. I am often read by people I interact with, but I am now comfortable as Alison. People can tell that Alison is the real me and I'm not afraid that they have figured me out. So, Dorothy, as hard as it is to overcome the fear (I know how hard it is - I was told this years ago), the more nervous you are the harder it is to pass. On one of my first ventures out a nice woman stopped me and gave me some clothing advice. I asked how she figured me out and she said it wasn't the clothes or makeup. I looked terrified. So search deep and find that confidence. It sounds like you have a wealth of it inside given your courage to venture out to the counselor en femme. Hopefully someday soon you'll see the irony that once you don't care as much about passing you'll begin to pass better.