Short Chapters: 23. The Playboy of the Western World

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In my head I heard Mrs. Legno's voice: "The day after Halloween you're just going to put your pants back on and go play football?"

and my reply: Not exactly, but something like that.

Short Chapters by Kaleigh Way

 

23. The Playboy of the Western World

 

The next day at school was one embarrassment after another.

To start with, I arrived in homeroom as the last bell was ringing. Another few moments, and I'd be late. Then, Mrs. Pearl asked me for my "slip."

"My what?" I asked in disbelief. In my sleepy brain I saw an image of Mrs. Jameson handing me a slip to wear under my dress last Sunday.

"Your slip, Mr. Samson, your slip," she repeated.

I still didn't get it. Puzzled and cautious I said, "I don't know what you're getting at, Mrs. Pearl."

"What I'm getting at?" she repeated, her eyebrows rising above her glasses. She shook her head in disapproval. "I *know* where you were on Friday." There were a few snickers from my classmates. "But where were you yesterday?"

"I... uh... uh..." I stammered, unsure what my parents had told the school about my absence.

"You uh uh," she repeated. "Go to the office, Mr. Samson, and see if you can explain yourself better. AND bring me back the excuse slip."

 


 

That pretty much set the theme for the day. I was in a fog from lack of sleep. Plus, I felt as if I'd been gone a month, not a long weekend. So much had happened!

The teachers looked at me in a bad way. They knew I'd been suspended on Friday, and they knew why. A few of them gave me a little warning about "going down a bad road" and things like that. The girls looked at me as if I was a creep. A lot of the boys, including many I didn't know, treated me as if I were some kind of hero.

As I walked through the halls between classes, I'd get dirty looks and pats on the back. Playful punches and judgmental disdain.

Kristie really milked it for all the attention she could get. Every time I glanced at her, even by accident, she toss her head with a scornful hmmph! She'd also gathered a group of girls around her, girls I didn't know, who eyed me malevolently. I got the definite message that if I came anywhere near Kristie, they would claw me to pieces.

Diana, on the other hand, was obviously as embarrassed as I was. Several times, our eyes locked, then dropped and we blushed together. I wanted to talk to her, to apologize, to make some kind of positive contact, but it wasn't going to be possible today. At least not at school.

When lunch time arrived, I sat at an empty table. I didn't want to put anyone on the spot.

Lou — my best friend, Lou — soon dropped into the chair opposite mine, and said, "You missed a great party, man!" He popped a french fry into his mouth and chewing said, "I hope it was worth it for you."

"Yeah, it was fun," I said, and sighed heavily.

"Doesn't sound like it. I mean, spare me the details, but are you okay?"

"Oh, it isn't Halloween," I replied. "It's my grandfather..." my voice trailed off, so I cleared my throat and started again. "He died this morning." Tears wanted to come, but I drew them back inside.

"Wow, sorry, man!" Lou said. "That really sucks! Was he in the hospital?"

"Yeah, he went in over the weekend. I got to go see grandpa with my Uncle Mickey."

He stopped, considering something. "Last night... when my mother went out..." then he stopped himself. "Never mind, I don't want to know."

"She came to pick me up at the hospital," I said. "She saw my Uncle Mickey. Did you know they used to date?"

"Whoa," Lou said. "Chapters, please. Don't start with the revelations and stuff. Really, I don't want to know."

"Okay," I said, and poked my sandwich with my finger. I couldn't decide whether I was hungry.

From the corner of my eye I saw a girl approach the other side of the table. Dark gray skirt, dark green top, medium brown hair. She rested her hand on Lou's shoulder. I liked her face.

"Hey, babe," she said to Lou. He smiled up at her.

"Chapters, this is my girlfriend Serena," he said. "Serena, Chapters."

"Ahhh," she said knowingly, and she nodded her head. "I've heard about you. You're the playboy of the western world, aren't you?" And she laughed a warm, throaty laugh.

I blushed deeply.

"Ah, no," she corrected herself. "Playboys don't blush. That's good."

I tried to smile at her, but felt a little tongue-tied.

"Nice to meet you, Chapters," she said. "See ya around. I'm gonna get some lunch, Lou. See ya after school!"

After she left, I told him, "She seems nice."

"Yeah," he said, smiling.

"You look like a dog," I told him, laughing.

"Yeah? Wait till you and Diana hook up," he retorted. "Then you'll look like a dog, too."

 


 

That night I was home alone. Mom and Dad were busy, and I was sick at heart. After I finished my homework there was nothing on TV, so I got a box, went to my room, and packed up all my clean Juliette clothes. The dirty ones and the costumes I put in the laundry.

Into the box went the Clarkina glasses, all my girly shoes and sneakers... Madison's clothes in their little plastic bag... and then...

I hesitated on dropping her into the box. It felt a little like a funeral. I thought about keeping her in my room, but it would be like the one red thread hanging out that could pull the whole story behind it, so in she went.

After folding the top closed, I put the box in Mom's sewing room. Goodbye, Juliette.

In my head I heard Mrs. Legno's voice: "The day after Halloween you're just going to put your pants back on and go play football?" and my reply: Not exactly, but something like that.

Was I going to miss Juliette? I don't know. I really did like some of those clothes... the cloth, the colors, the patterns. I don't know if a guy can get away with some of those things. But being a girl? No. It was fun being with Miranda, but all the rest of it? No. It was all just an extension of Halloween.

There was only one loose end to tie up, and that was Auralee.

I knew I'd see her at the funeral. How would she behave? What could she do that she didn't already do to me? She was a bully. She was mean. Been there, done that. Was she going to mock me about wearing a dress? So what. She was always mocking me already.

Was there some way I could finally put my foot down? Make her stop? Probably not.

In the end, the whole Auralee thing was anticlimactic. She was all broken up at Grandpa's funeral. All she did was cry. I've never seen anyone cry so hard. Even afterward, when we had a little reception at the Sons of Hibernia Hall, she just sat in a chair and cried.

That was it for Auralee.
 

Miranda told her mother that she'd figured out I was Victor, and came for a visit the week after the funeral. We played Scrabble and Clue, talked about things... but at the end of the day she told me, "Victor, you're a nice guy, but I prefer Juliette." And that was that.

 


 

So, done. All done. Juliette was in a box in my attic. I started walking home from school with Diana, and my mother was both relieved and alarmed when she caught the two of us making out in my living room one day.

I was back to being Victor, nothing but Victor, and glad to be me.

But of course there was a little postscript.

A letter arrived for me. In a clumsy, childish handwriting, it was addressed to "Juliette Samson." The return address was illegible.

I opened it and found a note from, of all people, Robert Murdoch. This is what it said:
 

Dear Juliette,

Please read this letter and don't be mad. I know I been a pest to you. You were always nice to me.

Miranda told me what you said about Mrs. Rosenstern. She got in big trouble and now she teaches the other fifth grade. My father went to school and yelled at her. We have Mrs. Lucas now. She is really nice.

I owe it all to you. I always knew you were an angel. I hope we can be friends.

Robert

 

"Oh, jeez," I said. The poor kid!

I fumbled with the letter for a bit, and read it two more times.

Then I went into the attic and slipped it into the Juliette box, for safekeeping.

 

[ The End ]

 

© 2009, 2010 by Kaleigh Way

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