Well, last night I was having a conversation with Jaci, when out of the blue I started shaking and crying. I bawled and bawled for about twenty minutes, while Jaci just let me go at it, but finally I wound down enough to regain some control again, at which point I wanted to know why this happened. Jaci thinks this was because of the tension I had going into my physical finally coming out, but I'm not so sure that's the only reason.
Ah, well.
Comments
Crying
Suddenly crying for no discernible reason is something that I find myself doing a lot these days. There have been many times where I was able to relate the crying to a song on the radio, or something I've seen on TV, or simply a thought that passed through my head. But there have also been times where I couldn't understand why it happened. I seem to have developed a habit of crying in the shower every day. I don't know why it happens, it just does.
Perhaps it's the tensions of the day being released all at once. Maybe it's just some buried issue finding it's way to the forefront while I stand under the shower head. I don't know, and I may never know. I do know that I usually feel better afterwards. For decades of my life, I was never able to express my feelings or allow them to show. Now that I have allowed myself to be myself, and adding in the impact of HRT, I have begun to feel things that I never felt before. I have begun to feel things deeper than I ever did before. If an occasional unexplained crying jag is the price I pay for that, I'm good with that.
You may simply have to face the fact that you will never know the cause of your crying. The important thing is that you can cry, and that you have friends to comfort you when you do.
I sincerely hope that you felt better afterwards. If you did, then the crying served it's purpose, and you have nothing to worry about. Remember, you're a woman, and we have the right to cry.
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
Partly?
...a great part, I might add? You don't have the 'luxury' of crying when you're with your daughter or ex, and being 'around' Jaci is a safe place where you don't have to hide or push your feelings aside.
Love, Andrea Lena
Safty Valve
My lovely lady you have to let some of the energy you have had aimed at you, out. Its best to do this when you are in a safe environment. This is just another indication that you are a girl, a whole girl, and nothing but a girl. full stop
This is how ,us, girls remain sane riding out the ravages of day to day life. Crying is a sign of copping well with all the pain you live with. Men process things differently and that is all I will say about that.
To put it simply "You be weathering heavy seas and have taken on water. It is a fine thing the bilge pumps can keep ye dry so ye do not sink me lassie. ARGH." sorry my inner Salish sea pirate personality suck out there. he he he
Bailey's misbehaving Faerie
Huggles
With those with open eyes the world reads like a book
Could Be Toxic
Hmmm...you may need to sit down and listen to a Britney Spears number. This one's very therapeutic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXJ67A5pt3U&feature=share&lis...
You say you want to be a woman.
Well, babe, this crying is part of the job. Are you on 'moans yet? Don't over do the dosage. I never took more than 4 mg. I'm down to less than 2 now. If you use Spiro that'll mess with you too.
Get used to it, you asked for the woman's life. :)
G