Been thinking a lot about my attractions to people since I did the "elephant in the room" post, and I found something odd looking back at the girls I had crushes on.

They had to meet three criteria - they had to be pretty, they had to be kind, and based on who I picked its now clear to me that they had to be unavailable.

So in fact, I picked "safe" girls, where there was little or no danger of an actual relationship developing.

Then there were my actual relationships, and in some ways, they were "safe" too. In the two cases of girls that I was serious with, both were almost asexual in terms of desire, at least towards me.

Make of that what you will.