I'm just sitting here, taking a break from processing apples to dry. Got the first batch going now, and have decided that slicing them in 1/4 thickness is high risk for me; almost cut a finger off twice!
Wait!!!! What is this, where did the person who used to top 175 ft fir trees, work on live 600 Volt panels, and stare down assailants with the single beady eye of my pistol, go? Yallah ! I don't recognize my life any more! Looking at my face; getting older; finally figured out that line inside my mouth matches with scar on my face. He drove my teeth through my lip a long time ago. Maybe I now need to recognize this new life and embrace it?
Out the window, I can see chickadees, cardinals, nuthatches, and a wood pecker fighting over the bird feeder. A while ago, I listened to a Heron "grocking" away at something. Maybe she's lonely? I lust after a sailboat sitting at dockside just across the way. I could make her live and squirm happily in the ropes in my hands. Once in a while I hear a big squirrel loudly threating every thing around it.
A little while ago I read about Ricki saving his princess, and felt heartbroken for her lady in waiting who'd just seen her new husband killed right before her eyes. Earlier, I read about a huge biker making love to me. What, hoe, wait stupid, it was not about me but the protagonist in the story, and her feelings were being turned to mush by this huge biker! Yallah !!! What am I to do, my imagination is being like totally Haraaaam! giggle, but no one to spank me. :(
One counselor says I have a high capacity for adventure. Another says I am impulsive, AS IF !!! I have decided that I like the adventure better. I was frightened of leaving Oregon; afraid that some red neck would kill me either because I am Muslim or Twoman. Shockingly, neither happened to me at all and now I am taking bike rides alone to watch the sunset.
Hopefully, I will not pass South of the Mason/Dixon line. I hear some of those folks would be happy to send me to the next life.
It is really odd feeling. In a single day, I can talk to a Man in the Army whom I admire very much, and 15 minutes later can be skyping with a young Saudi man that I am trying to encourage to go to College. Hopefully, by education, radicalization can be stopped. I am wondering when I will get back to New York to visit a Cathy up there. It is a pretty drive if you can stand all the construction.
A visitor is coming soon and she will take us to Niagra falls, on the Canadian side. Last night, one of the roommates complained to me about buying food when it was not Saturday. I am not the submissive little subbie I thought I was, at least for now, she found out.
I love romance stories, but am writing a war story! What am I doing? Perhaps no one will read it and no one will know. My life is so full of unexpected surprises. We drove clear across America almost, and we did so many things wrong. We deserved to get in a lot of trouble, but we didn't. How can that happen? I thank the one who watched over us!
This morning I am feeling keen for adventure. I'd like to go see an Amish farm. Would we have anything in common? Are they Calvanistic or Armenian in their philosophy? I can understand their wagons; cars are such a headache, but no buttons? That is too much for me, I can not.
I have been wondering about the Trans Canada Highway? Is this something I can do myself? In leaving Oregon, having something distract me and tangle my feet seemed appealing. I wonder if I could encounter that huge bearded biker/farmer/trucker/banker(?) guy? Would he be upset by my secret? Along the way, maybe I could work at a resturant, or drive a big truck! I understand they have power steering, and good brakes. Would they let me tape blocks to the pedals so I could reach them? Yallah! The Tyre chains, I can not pick them up! What am I to do? Maybe driving snow plow would be fun? If I asked, maybe they would look at my little car and ask how this woman can drive snow plow; she is crazy! Make her stay home and cook bread!
Well, enough! There is laundry, and cleaning. I wonder what I will fix the girls for dinner? Maybe Zuchini bread for a start? I have never made that before; ah, the adventure!
Much peace
Khadijah Gwendolyn Hala Ellen ... Um Brown. enough already!
Comments
Life = Adventure
Continue treating life as one big adventure, where you're willing to embrace / deal with whatever may happen to be around the next corner, and you'll (probably) do fine. You've already shown us you don't get along with the (labels / pigeonholes / boxes) people use to classify other people, so just continue doing your own thing (as long as it's legal, of course!), regardless of what others may think.
You only get one chance at this experience we call "life", so you may as well make the most of it and enjoy the ride!
There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't...
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Once upon a time
.... there were two Aggies who were driving across the Permian Basin. The sun was starting to set and they were nowhere close to Lubbock, and they should have been there hours ago. Finally, one Aggie turns to the other. "You know, I think we're going to have to admit we're lost." "I know," said the other Aggie looking at the speedometer, "but, we're making great time."
Portia
Portia
Two things Gwen.
First get yourself a veggie slicer gadjet that avoids the finger shortening thing with the knife.
Secondly education does not stop radicalisation of Muslims, or any other religious group for that matter. The two stupid twats who drove a landrove loaded with explosives into Glasgow airport passenger doors (and failed to set the bomb off,) were both recently graduated doctors.
How's that for dumb!!!?
I suggest you 'get out more' and drive accross Canada.
Love and Hugs,
OXOXOX
Beverly
Growing old disgracefully and completely haraamly.
Strongly agree!
>>I suggest you 'get out more' and drive across Canada.
It's about 5,000 miles, so you might want to pack a lunch :)
From where I am.
Mapbum says it is 3100, but of course I am not doing the eastern half, having heard that the pseudo french do not like yanks. Of course the same friend said that they don't like the French either.
I'd really like to have done New Foundland and Nova Scottia. Ah well, in the next life perhaps.
In fact, I tried to set my SRS up with that Doc up there and his staff was like, um not good to me.
What ever!
Gwendolyn
Well
I happen to be from Nova Scotia and I live in New Brunswick, we have a hugely mixed population here and I just have to walk less than a block for good Swarma and On Saturdays there's Indian, Morrocan, Japanese and German food and people. Montreal is filled with immigrants as a Canadian and an Eastern Canadian come on over to see us. If you are ever close i'll take you out for a bite.
Ya got nothing to worry about.
Bailey Summers
yeah, well
The 'pseudo french' REALLY would not like anyone who calls them pseudo-french. That's remarkably offensive, and I'm not even one of them.
Well, just get over it.
I thought my statement included adequate justification, and the information was from some one who lived there.
Gwendolyn
Ah, never mind then.
Your comments speak volumes, and I don't think I could add anything further.
I wonder why they don't like Americans?
I'll just get on with getting over it. Sorry to have bothered you.
The Zuchini bread is wonderful !!!
I never made anything like that before, no not even bread! The girls say it is wonderful. Wallah ! Oh, I have done pancakes and yesterdays' had pineapple in them. Yummmiiii ! It has been two weeks since a big mac. I am almost completely vegetarian now, and you know what, my Arthritis and all that Achie Breaky stuff is gone!
Hey, I plan to be intolerable now.
Gwendolyn
It's not the journey
I dont't know.
I've read enough of your blogs to have a sense that you are so much farther along the path than any of those that I've read here, including me. But I get the sense that you are still so into the searching that you are still beginning.
I guess it is different for everyone. For me, the journey is but a means to an end - that the journey will eventually end, and, if, in the end, it is not what I dreamed it would be, I would have the strength of character and the emotional will to accept it and be happy.
Based on the snippets that I read here, I have a bit of an idea of what you go through in your day-to-day. Seems to me, you are out to prove yourself still despite the fact you are so much further along the path than I, and to point the wrongs of people, and to fight for what is right. I am not as physical a person as you, not having climbed hundred-foot trees, worked on high-tension power cables, or fought off bad guys with a gun. And perhaps that is the reason why I perceive my life differently. But at the same time, you speak of a duality, of also yearning for the more placid and gentler life - a life of emotions instead of a life full of pro-activeness.
In most western cultures today, it is thought that it is the prerogative of the female to change her mind if and when she wants. Perhaps, with this in mind, you should give yourself the leeway to be as free to follow whatever path you choose to follow, instead of pigeonholing yourself to be one way or another, and not have to ask if this is the right way to go. I hate it when I am caught in a never-ending indecisiveness of continually asking myself the question "is this right," or "why"? To ask why a person has to be this way, and never thinking, hey, isn't it enough to be? I think wanting to be in the pro-active role and, at the same time, having a more nurturing role, is a perfectly okay way to be. You don't have to be one or the other, or to have to conform to the stereotype female role, or whatever.
Femaleness is a gift to me - and I am thankful I have that now, even if it is not a natural 100% kind of femaleness. To live as a female, even as imperfectly as I am living now - that is a gift, and this feeling of rightness - this is the affirmation, that, yes, I did the right thing. I don't know how you feel about it, really, but I hope you find some kind of an affirmation from it, instead of having to always have to defend yourself against those who don't understand.
Perhaps my puny little life goals don't amount to a hill of beans for others, but to me, all I want to be is to be accepted. That is enough of an adventure. So save me a slice of that zuchini bread, and maybe in the future, you can be more adventurous and try making some pumpernickel bread? Heehee.
(also, i think you mean "voila!" heehee.)
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