What would you do if you found out that you were the child of Lucifer and what is basically an immortal woman? Will you rale against Fate? Would you curse God for who your parents were? Would you face the oncoming battle for your soul with a smile? Would you curl up in a ball and hope that it was all a dream? That is the problem facing one young man as his reality changes

---

Chapter 17
Paperwork. Hell’s greatest torture.

“Can someone please tell me. Why am I filling out a twenty-one page, single space, report on capturing an escapee?” I demanded of my seven clan heads.

“Princess Ashley, you preformed an unauthorized capture. A capture I might add that you preformed on Holy ground. First you attacked a member of the Swiss Guard in public view. You sicked your Hellhound guardian on your prey without any thought to the consequences. Namely mass panic among civilian bystanders. You then summoned your Hell cycle to the earthly plan without authorization. Where you then proceeded to engage in a high speed pursuit through the streets of Rome and onto a major Italian Interstate. Leaving behind a trail of melted asphalt. After capturing your prey, you summoned a Hell portal. You did all of this in view of several witnesses.” Jesmond told me from her desk then smirked. “Be thankful it’s only twenty-one pages. Lord Methuselah is going easy on you because this is your first time.”

“Okay I can deal with that. What I, don’t understand is why I have to use a typewriter? I could turn this out in half the time if I could use my laptop.” I bitched as I hit the return bar.

“The joys of paperwork in Hell.” Mom chuckled as she entered my office. When I looked up at her there was a small smile tugging at her lips. “One of the tortures is to use technology that you’ll be uncomfortable with Ashley.”

“So, if I was comfortable with a manual typewriter. I would have to write all of this out by hand?” I asked her.

“More like having to learn cuneiform or hieroglyphics.” Jesmond snorted.

“Knowing Methuselah, he would make her learn Martian. Just to screw her.” Mom snarked then chuckled at her own joke. “Then again he might allow her to use a desktop computer. If it was an Apple Lisa.”

“What’s an Apple Lisa?” I asked in confusion.

“The most diabolical computer ever developed by Steve Jobs. Only Bill Gates has corrupted more people.” Jesmond told me with a soft smile. “I have to say. The corruption of those two men has to be one of Lady Lilith’s greatest achievements. How she ever saw the impact that computers would have on the world is beyond my comprehension.” Jesmond sighed.

“That is why we are Hunters, sister.” Mavis said as she entered my office. “Excuse me Princess but I have the reports for the other captures. They need your signature and authorization before sending them to Central Processing.”

“How many?” I asked with a sigh.

“Not counting yours, Princess. Thirty-eight captures and nine eliminations. All nine eliminations were forced by outside elements.” Mavis told me.

“How often are our people forced to eliminate one of our prey?” I demanded.

“More often than we like to admit, Princess. The Forces of Chaos have been actively recruiting souls to upend the Grand Plan. We don’t know their goal, but all of these individuals have one thing in common. They want to bring about the End of Times, Armageddon, Ragnarök, whatever name you use it all means the same thing. The final confrontation between Good and Evil.” Mavis told me with a sad look in her eyes.

“Which nine were eliminated?” I asked her.

“Three CEOs, two stockbrokers, two South American cattle barons, one cyber billionaire, and something called a dotcom executive.” Mavis told me.

“The two stockbrokers along with the software tech monkeys I can see as being key members to bringing about Armageddon. What was the deal with the CEOs and cattlemen?” I asked her.

“All three CEOs used their golden parachutes during the bank Methuselah out of oh-eight. They destroyed more than three-hundred-thousand families. As for the cattlemen. They went out of their way to inflate the cost of their beef. I believe the term is price gouging. I won’t even go into how they came by the land they use for raising their cattle. Needless to say, their actions cause a number of families to die from hunger.” Mavis explained.

“Then why all the paperwork? Who cares is a bunch of assholes become nothing more than a memory?” I asked her.

“Those souls won’t get their chance at redemption, Princess. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s in the rules.” Jesmond told me.

“Okay I can see that. Even though we’re damned for all eternity mortal souls are offered a chance at redemption.” I quickly realized.

“Exactly, Princess. The kick in the head about the eliminations is those nine souls would have bolstered several of our ranks.” Mavis sighed.

“Nothing we can do about it now. Just make sure that the next time there is an elimination all the paperwork is in order. I’ll take the heat. That is my job.” I told them and began to sign the stack of reports.

“Excuse me, Princess.” Elsa said as she entered my office.

“What dog pissed in the road now?” I snarled.

“Did I just come at a bad time?” Elsa asked Jesmond and Mavis.

“No Elsa.” Mom chuckled. “My daughter is learning the joys of paperwork.”

“Oh.” Elsa said then she saw the look of impending mayhem in my eyes. “OH!”

“What is so damned urgent that you had to leave your hunt early?” I asked. I knew that it had to be bad if Elsa was in my office. She had already shown me that I could count on her and her clan.

“I was approached by the Angel Gadreel and Lady Tinaya the moment I appeared on the mortal plain.” Elsa told me bluntly.

“Aw, shit. What do those two shitheads want now?” Mom asked for me.

“They wish to discuss the terms of Hunting Rights to Princess Ashley’s old high school.” Elsa told her honestly.

“What the hell does that mean?” I demanded.

“All of your old schools were off limits to both Heaven and Hell while you were still on earth and mortal. Now that you have fallen those schools are no longer protected by the old agreement of noninterference.” Mom told me then explained. “The Angel Gadreel and Lady Tinaya represent the two halves of the same coin. For Hell that is the succubus. For Heaven it the Bright succubus. They may look like the same creature, but they’re not. The succubus feeds on sexual desire. While the bright succubus feeds on pain. To be exact they feed on emotional pain.”

“And high schools are chockfull of both pinned up pain and desire. Fertile feeding grounds for both sides.” I figured out quickly. “When I was attending school both sides stayed away. Now that I’m no longer there they figure that each side has rights to that school.”

“Which has led to an escalation of tensions between the two groups.” Elsa told me as she placed a rolled up scroll in front of me. “This is a formal request for a parlay on natural grounds.”

“Why is it coming to me?” I asked her in confusion.

“Because it was your old school. According to our traditions, you have first claim to those souls.” Jesmond told me quickly.

“Find. Tell them they’re free to share.” I told Elsa.

“It’s not that simple, Princess.” Jesmond said with a heavy sigh. “You have to hear out both sides’ reasons for hunting at your old school.”

“Don’t forget that you need to file a HD-five-oh-five-A request from for mediation on natural grounds.” Mavis told me.

“Why do I have a feeling that those two shitheads dropped this in my lap to avoid the paperwork?” I asked with snarl. When Mavis, Jesmond, and mom all chuckled I dropped my head on the desk. “How long is the damned form?”

“Only five pages, Ashley. The problem is it has to be filed with both home offices, and the IRS.” Mom told me with a small grin.

“What? You got to be kidding me? The IRS? Really?! What do I have to do pay taxes for holding a meeting on natural ground?” I asked in shock.

“No dear.” Mom chuckled. “The IRS in this situation is the Infernal Resources Service. They oversee all matters concerning the mortal realm.”

“Oh great. More bureaucratic bullshit.” I snarled then sighed asking. “Who do I got to talk with to cut through the red tape?”

“You could always try Jade’s Place, Princess.” Mavis suggested.

“Who’s Jade?” I asked her.

“Someone that you only go to as a last resort.” Mom told me. “File the paperwork first. If it get’s denied. Then you can go to Jade.”

“Fine.” I grumbled. “Bring me the form.”

Mavis just turned and left my office only to return a few minutes later pushing a handcart. The cart held five boxes. Each one was marked with a number. “Two copies of form HD-five-oh-five-A, Princess. Have fun.”

“Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?” I screamed as mom, Jesmond, and Mavis just stood there laughing at me. For some reason I think I might have just been played. “That’s not really a five-oh-five-A. Is it?”

“In all of its glory.” Mavis told me with a grin as she patted the boxes. “This is the real five-oh-five-A. A copy needs to be filed for both parties.”

“At least it’s not in triplicate.” I grumbled and began to fill out the from. As I got halfway through the first page I hit a major stumbling block. “How in the name of all that’s Holy and Unholy am I supposed to know where I’m holding this little get together. When I, haven’t even figured out if they’ll agree to the meeting?”

“That my dear is one of the great mysteries of peace talks.” Mom chuckled.

Chapter 18
I hate lawyers.

I have spent the last two days working on that damned HD-505-A. I’ve made eight trips back and forth between the two earthly offices for Heaven and Hell. That was just to work out a location for the meeting between me, Gadreel, and Tinaya. Now I’m working on the catering. I mean come on people!

Who cares what hors d’oeuvres are served or what wine is used for toasting the deal. I was wanted something small. You know like what President Franklin D. Roosevelt did for King George VI and his wife, Queen Elizabeth. I mean what’s wrong with hot dogs and cold beer? I mean if they’re good enough for World Dignitaries, they should be good enough for those two smucks. But no! That cunt upstairs feels that common food and drinks is beneath her. I won’t even go into what that slut succubus said. Let’s just say that if Grandma Lilith hadn’t intervened there would be one less magic user in Hell.

“Is there anything I can do to help, Princess?” Helga asked from the door to my office as I pounded my head on my desk for the umpteenth time.

“Not unless you can tell why I have to be the one to handle all the arrangements for this little talk?” I asked her bluntly.

“Don’t ask me, Mistress. Hot dogs and beer sound good to me.” Helga snorted.

“Yeah, well, a three day dead rat is a delicacy in your eyes.” I snorted as Helga nodded her head like a puppy. “Oh, pull your tongue in ya’ mutt. I’ve already got enough problems without putting those on the menu.”

Before Helga could make a cutting remark about the menu the intercom on my desk buzzed. “Excuse me, Princess. There is a messenger from your father here. He says it’s important.”

“Send him in, Gretchen.” I ordered the damned soul, but not before I hit a button that would send an electrical shock through her crotch. When the door to my office opened I had to do a double take. In the last few days, I’ve seen demons of every stripe you can think of. I talking succubae, incubuses, hellhounds, lilium, anti-paladins, gargoyles, imps, classic devils, hags, hellmaids, and even; a host to God, Death Dragons. But nothing I’ve seen could have prepared me for a 12ft long red tapeworm, carrying a briefcase, wearing glasses and a bowler hat, smoking a churchwarden pipe. “WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF DEMON ARE YOU?”

“I madam, am a Red Tapeworm. It has come to your father’s attention that you are currently trying to work your way through the headache that is the HD-five-oh-five-A request for natural grounds meeting form. To use a phrase from the mortal realm. I’m a parasite lawyer.” The damned thing told me as it set down its briefcase and actually tipped its hat to me. The worm then had the audacity to hand me a business card.

“Ah shit. I hate lawyers.” I snarled read9ing the card. “You have got to be kidding me. Is your name really Dewy Cheatem Howe?”

“Of course, it is Princess. Where else would you find a lawyer? You can’t trust any of us.” The worm snarked and puffed his pipe. “However, you’ll be happy to have me here. In my human life I was an attorney for the US Internal Revenue Service. I know exactly how those slugs in the Infernal Resource Service think. After all it was modeled after my old agency, and I’m well versed in their underhanded deals.”

“If that’s the case sir. I welcome your help.” I told the worm.

“Now for starters the reason you have to arrange for the refreshments. The answer is complicated. The simple answer is because you’re the one calling for the meeting.” The worm told me.

“I’M NOT THE ONE WHO WANTED THE DAMNED THING!” I screamed.

“Be that as it maybe, Princess. The request did originate from your office. Therefore, in accordance with the treaty between Heaven and Hell. You as the aggrieved party in an attempt to resolve the issue in a nonviolent manner must work to appease both aggressors. That is the reason for catering the meeting. Might I suggest we contact the Sour Genie. They have handle such events in the past for both sides.” The worm told me with a smug attitude.

“I don’t care.” I whined. “I just want to get this damned from filled out and filed. I don’t have time for this shit.”

“That is why your father sent me.” The worm smirked.

“You know that is something a lawyer would say.” I snarled.

“Of course, I could be here just to add to your torment.” The bastard chuckled. “I am a lawyer after all.”

The second he said it I knew I would never get the thought out of my head. No matter how hard I pounded my head on my desk. Helga just sat back on her hunches laughing with her tongue hanging out. When I finally looked from my desk the HD-505 from was completely filled out.

“Exactly what kind of lawyer were you in your mortal life?” I asked the worm.

“I was a parasite lawyer.” He told me bluntly.

“Uh?” I asked in confusion.

“I specialized in international business law.” He explained.

“Okay I get it. You were the same thing as a divorce or corporate lawyer.” I snarked as the worm turn a deeper shade of red.

Chapter 19
The Conference.

There are times when being the Princess of Hell can be a real pain in the ass. Today is one of those times. It has took me fifteen days to make all of the arrangements for this little chat. I was actually surprised at the rather normal looking restaurant where we were holding this conference. The Sour Genie looked like your typical roadside dinner. Then again it does sit in the middle of nowhere on Route 66 halfway between Albuquerque, New Mexico and Amarillo, Texas. I kind of like the place. It reminded me of this great little place called the Jug back home. Sadly, it went out of business.

“Welcome to the Sour Genie Miss. How many in your party?” A teenage girl asked as I entered the dinner.

“They should already be here Miss.” I told her looking around the restaurant. When I spotted the reserved section I smiled.

“Excuse me Ma’am. That area is reserved for a special party.” The girl told me and moved to stop me.

“I won’t do that Gabby. Princess Ashley has an extremely short temper and little tolerance for stupidity.” An angel told her as she stepped in behind me. “I think the last person to incur her wrath was a lawyer.”

“Not really. The last dipshit to piss me off was a Department Head of Hell.” I chuckled as the girl turned white and showed her true form. “I see. You’re one of the true djinn of Persia.”

“Please forgive my rudeness Princess.” The genie said with a quick curtsy. Not fast enough for me to read her name tag.

“You’re forgiven Gabby. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” I told her and headed for the table that was set aside for our use. As I neared the table a succubus entered the dinner. I knew right away that she was Lady Tinaya. Just as the angel was the Angel Gadreel. As I sat down I took in all of the other costumers. There were all types of supernatural beings in this tiny dinner. “This has got to be the most screwed up dinner in the world.”

“Not really Princess. We just have an unusually high number of supernatural beings in the restaurant today.” A normal looking woman told me. It took me a second to realize that she was one of the immortal four queens of the djinn. As much as I wanted to ask for a wish from this woman I knew better. “You’re verry wise for your years Princess Ashley.”

“Let’s just say that I remember that old joke about djinn logic. You know the one where you wish for a million dollars and a bag full of money appears out of nowhere.” I told her honestly then smirked as I delivered the punchline for the joke. “Along with a SWAT Team holding a warrant for your arrest.”

“That is one I haven’t heard.” The djinn queen said with a small chuckle. “I am the proprietor of this establishment. Azsain the Honest and purveyor of truth. None may lie within my presences.”

“Now I know why Dewy felt this place would be perfect.” I told her with a smile. “You automatically detect any deceit.”

“Let’s get this over with.” Tinaya snapped as she near the table. “My people have souls to corrupt and gather.”

“Sit down and shut up bitch. Before I snatch a knot in your ass.” I told her coldly. When she went to argue with me I remind her of who she was dealing with. “Remember what you’re asking for Tinaya. Those schools are still under my protection. I can easily end this meeting by removing you from existence.”

“Yes your Majesty.” Tinaya squeaked as she meekly sat down next to me.

“I must say Princess. You have a unique way of dealing with your subordinate. I approve.” Gadreel snarked as she said down across the table.

“Shut it whore. Unlike my father and uncle. I have no use for shitheads who prey upon the weaknesses of others.” I growled.

“You would actually challenge an angel of my power?” Gadreel chuckled. “I know your weakness. I can defeat you.”

“You really think so?” I chuckled. With a small wave of my hand, I summoned a Hell bolt. “Like I told Tinaya. I’ll end this little meeting by removing you from existence. From what I can see. You would make a nice yakitori.”

“A what?” The angel asked in confusion.

“Yakitori is a skewered and grilled chicken.” Azsain informed her with a chuckle. “I must say Princess Ashley. You have a very low opinion of angels.”

“Let’s just say that most of them aren’t worth my time. The ones that I have dealt with so far all think to highly of themselves, Azsain.” I told her with a friendly smile as Gadreel bristled. “That includes my own father.”

“You dare to compare an angel to that unclean spirit.” Gadreel spate.

“I do. Micheal is just as big a pouncy asshole as my father.” I told her with a small chuckle as the angel grimaced. “Trust me I should know. I’ve had to deal with both of them.”

“Have you no respect for our Lord and Master, Princess?” Tinaya asked me in disbelieving shock. “He is your father after all.”

“Nope. None at all. Last time I checked he was nothing than my sperm donor.” I told her with a grin. “You can ask him yourself. He’ll be here shortly, and most likely he won’t be alone.”

“Why would Lucifer come here? Who is coming with him.” Azsian asked me quickly. “He knows that my restaurant is natural grounds.”

“I’m here. This is my first official duty on earth as a representative of Hell. Daddy and Uncle Mickey want to make sure I don’t make a hash of things.” I told them with a small grin as both Gadreel and Tinaya blanched white at my very blatant show of disrespect for two of the most powerful angels in existence. Not that I gave two shits for their opinions. Azsian had a totally deferent reaction to my words.

“Rissume, please escort the Archangels Lucifer and Micheal to their usual table when they arrive. Azura, make sure to have a bottle of 1875 St. Miriam whiskey for them.” I was actually surprised by Azsian’s order.

“If you really want to make an impression. Produce a bottle from NYC Mayor Jimmy ‘Beau James’ Walker’s personal collection.” I snarked only to Azsian give me a strange look. “What? I may be a teenager, but I know my whiskeys and fine liquors. I’ve tasted enough rotgut moonshine and good whiskey to know the difference between the two.”

“Can we get this over with already?” Gadreel asked politely.

“We’re still waiting the arrival of two others that this little agreement will affect. They should be here momentarily.” I told her.

“Who are you talking about?” Gadreel asked with a snarl.

“Why your male counterparts.” I told her smugly.

“Oh, please tell me you did not invite that pompous ass Torihr, Princess?” Tinaya asked with pleading eyes.

“You wounded me with your words dear sister.” Rather tall, dark, and hansom man dressed in a suit straight out of 1950’s film noir movie. He had a real Humphry Bogart feel to him. He turned to me with a slight nod of his head. “Thank you for informing of my sister’s attempt to secure exclusive hunting rights to this era’s high school, Princess.”

“Not a problem Torihr. Is Hasmal with you?” I asked the incubus.

“I am here Princess Ashley.” The angel said formally as he appeared in a burst of white light. “I must say that I was surprised that you would even think to include at male halves of our two opposing orders.”

“Why wouldn’t I include you gentlemen. On one side we have Hope and Dreams. The other side represents Lust and Desire.” I explained then smiled at the four adults. “Now shall we get down to business.”

“I will leave you kind people to your discussion.” Asian told us and left.

“Alright Princess. Now that you got us here. How exactly are we going to divide up the rights to hunt amongst your erstwhile peers?” Tinaya asked.

“I had planned on was an equal share for all of you. Only there is a problem with that.” I told her honestly as I thought of your average teenager.

“What is the problem? We get those who are naturally drawn to heaven. While those who are damned by their own actions belong in the grips of hell.” Gadreel told me bluntly.

“Then you don’t consider an emotionally disturbed young man or woman worthy of Heaven? What of those who do not believe in God? What of those who follow the path of the druid or wiccan traditions? Better yet what of those who actually believe God made a mistake with their births? Are they not unworthy of redemption?” I asked her bluntly.

“The rules state.” Gadreel started to say only to stop her with a snarl.

“Fuck the rules. The game is rigged if you follow the rules. You angels are so hung up on the damned rules that innocent children are ending up in Hell. I should know because I have seen their souls passing throw the Gate.” I snarled and spit in the bitch’s face. “You have forgotten your Word.”

“What would you know of my Word?” Gadreel asked in surprise.

“More than you or your brother could understand in a thousand lifetimes. I may only be a babe among immortals, but I do read.” That was something I had always done. “You would be wise to read the works of several mortal authors. Their understanding of the laws that govern us is amazing.”

“I must say Princess Ashley. You show a remarkable knack for finding the Truth of a matter. Now that you understand the situation how do we proceed?” Hasmal asked with a smile.

“The only way we can to guarantee a fair dispensation of hunting rights among you. Only one member per clan may hunt the halls of high schools. They can only target one person school. If an angel should cross a succubus’s prey they can attempt to save them. However, a succubus can also attempt to corrupt an angel’s prize. The same for your male counterparts. The only exception to those rules are those that are called to a higher calling. They shall remain off limits to both parties.” As I was explaining my solution to the problem. Each one slowly nodded their heads. “Are you all in agreement?”

“I can only speak for my angels.” Gadreel said with a smile. “But we will abide by your ruling, Princess.”

“As will the succubae, Highness.” Tinaya said with a bow of her head. I could tell that the two men were going to be a problem.

“Gentlemen, let me be prefect honest with you. Either agree to this accord, or I’ll blow the both of you straight to hell. The moment you set foot in the parking lot.” I snarled as I pulled the feather from my necklace.

To my surprise instead of holding my usual double bladed spear I was holding matching pistols. They were both Colt firearms .454 Casull magnum pistols. This monsters are built on M1911 express frames. They’re beasts at 335mm in length with a weight of 4kg. Each held a 7 round magazine with 1 in the chamber. The bullets are 250-grain jacketed with a ‘casing’ of blessed Macedonian silver. Each one with a muzzle velocity of over 1,900 feet per second, developing more than 2,000 ft-lb of energy.

“THERE WILL BE NO VIOLENCE IN MY PLACE OF BUSINESS!” Azsian screamed. At her warning I returned both weapons to the void.

“My apologies Azsian. I lost my patience with these two pigheaded asshole males.” I told the proprietress with a bow of my head.

“You are forgiven Princess. I can see the truth of your words.” Azsian said with a smile. “And you were not the one I was yelling at. Allow me to handle the problem children in your party.”

With a snap of her fingers both men became toddlers in highchairs. When I started to laugh Lucifer and Micheal stood up from their table. I watched as they both neared our table. I could tell that they were both pissed off.

“Hold up daddy. This is neutral ground. They were going to break that very neutrality and suffered the consequences.” I told them as I stood up.

“We have no problems with their punishment daughter. We only came over here to leaned you the needed authority to in force your will.” Lucifer explained.

“I am in agreement with your father, Ashley.” Micheal said as he stood menacingly over Gadreel. “You have been given the terms Gadreel. Terms that I find to be both fair, and just.”

“Understood Lord Micheal. I’ll make sure that Hasmal and his minions abide by them.” The angel told him with her head bowed.

“Tinaya you have heard the terms.” Lucifer snarled.

“And they will be adhered to my Lord. I will make sure that Torihr and his brothers understand.” Tinaya squeaked out quickly.

“I only have one problem.” Lucifer said all of a sudden. “What will be the punishment for those who break the rules?”

“I’m a firm believer in ass beatings. Though seeing as how both sides can regenerate I’m thinking about banding them from what has to be the most fertile hunting grounds on the mortal plain.” I suggested honestly.

“If that doesn’t work?” Micheal asked me.

“Oh, I don’t know Uncle Micheal.” I said sweetly as I once again summon my new soul weapons. Holding the one in my right hand high enough to kiss the sight at the end of the slide. “Let’s just say that a four-fifty-four magnum makes a great big hole in people.”

“Lucy can you explain to me why your daughter always resorts to violence to solve a problem?” Micheal sighed.

“Because unlike you and me brother. Ashley will always be true to not only her Word, but to herself.” Lucifer told him bluntly.

“By the way Uncle Micheal. When can I expect your little test?” I asked him.

“Now, what makes you think I have already present my test?” Micheal asked. “I could very well have set all of this in motion to test you.”

“Simple. You’re not that sneaky of a bastard. You have always preferred an honest fight to political maneuvering. You leave that up to my father.” I told him bluntly then grinned nastily. “And he is not stupid enough to try me. He already knows about quick my temper.”

“It seems that we are undone Lucy. Your lovely daughter has seen through us both.” Micheal chuckled before turning to me. “Your last test will happen on the summer equinox. It will be held in the middle of White Sands at the stroke of noon. Don’t be late.”

“Won’t dream of it Uncle Mickey.” I told him and headed for the door.

Chapter 20
A surprising set of collections.

“God I hate this place.” I grumbled as I looked up at the gate for Auschwitz. “Helga are you sure that the soul is in there?”

“As sure as I can be, Mistress. This city is chuck full of ghosts. It’s hard to tell one lost soul from the other. Their stench lays heavy on the ground here.” The Hellhound grumbled. “What is this place Mistress?”

“Welcome to Hell on earth Helga. At least what humans were capable of creating at one time in our history.” I told her with a heavy heart.

“Hell is hell Mistress. Nothing humans can build could ever compare.” Helga snorted then snort a second time. “What is that stench?”

“What you’re Helga smelling is the suffering of over one-point-one million people. One of the greatest tragedies in human history. Did you know that the jews that where sent here to die actually put God on trial?” I asked.

“Mear humans actually dared to question the Divine?” Helga asked in shock.

“They did. According to the story while awaiting their inevitable deaths at this very concentration camp, one of the worse. There was a group of Jews that held a rabbinical court to decide whether God had gone against the Holy Covenant and if He is the one guilty for their suffering.” I told her bluntly.

“Did they find God guilty?” Helga asked with real curiosity.

“Nobody really knows but according to the story two theories were put forth. The first theory proposed that God must allow people to choose actions that lead to horrible results because human freedom of will is such an important value a solution that many consider to be the true one but is rejected with contempt. The second was proposed by a rabbi. He reviews the record of God’s deeds against Israel’s enemies in the Hebrew Bible, and draws the conclusion that God is not good, a that he has simply been on their side throughout history. He recounts that he had seen the phrase “God is with us” engraved on the belts of the German guards, concluding that God has now turned against the Jews once and for all. The account is so powerful that the others accept it, and there is a moment of silence before they began to pray for their salvation from the Nazis. Now this is all according to one of the few surviving blockaltesters from the camp.” I told her as I felt the soul we were here to collect approached us. I took in the ghosts uniform and knew that he wasn’t one of the guards. “Why would a Waffen SS Panzerschütze be here? It doesn’t make any since to.”

“I will not run Huntress. I only want fifteen minutes to say I’m sorry.” The soldier told me with deep regret.

“What regrets would a Nazi have?” I snarled.

“I failed to protect those who I swore to protect. Jews, gypsies, it shouldn’t have mattered. I was a soldier. What they did here was a crime against more than humanity. It was a crime against the soul of my nation.” The soldier told me as he looked towards the old train station for the camp. “This must never happen again.”

“You have my word Kapitän. If it is within my power. I will stop something like this from happening again.” I told him.

“I would think that the denizens of Hell would rejoice over another such tragedy.” The soldier told me in confusion.

“I’m not like most denizens of Hell.” I told him with a chuckle.

“You can say that again.” Helga snorted.

“I’m not like most denizens of Hell.” I snarked as the soldier chuckled.

“Please, don’t make me laugh, Huntress. These grounds do not deserve to hear my laughter. Only my pleas for forgiveness.” The soldier told me.

“Did you part take in the operation of this place?” I asked him.

“No. I never even knew that it existed.” The soldier told me honestly.

“Then why should you ask for their forgiveness? I can tell by the piping on your color and the insignia that you were a tanker. A frontline soldier. We’re you part of the Einsatzgruppen?” I asked him.

“No. Those thugs should be hunted down and dragged straight to the deepest pits of Hell.” He spat out.

“Excuse me Mistress, but our prey is nearing the far blockhouse.” Helga told me as she sniffed the air. “This ghost is not our prey.”

“Are you sure Helga?” I asked of the Hellhound. When she gave me the harry eyeball I sighed. “Sorry. I should know better than to question your nose.”

“A trusted hound is hard to find, Huntress. I miss my panzer troop’s mascot. She was a beautiful Weimaraner.” The soldier sighed. “Sugar was such a good dog. She died saving me and my crew.”

“How did she do that sir?” I asked as I kept my eye on the soul that we were there to capture. I could tell that this one was a true piece of shit. One that belonged in Hell. Right beside Hitler and the rest of his thugs.

“Sugar stopped a Russian attack on us. The man was going to hit us with a Molotov cocktail while we were refueling.” The soldier told me with a voice filled with more regret than I would ever expect from a soldier. With a wave of my hand, I called for the dog. As she appeared before me the soldier dropped to his knees. The dog leaped into his arms as he began to cry.

“Time to go home soldier.” I said and waved my hand once more. Only this time I sent him and the dog to their heavenly reward. Completely bypassing the Saint Peter and the Pearly Gate’s Judges.

“You know that both your father and Archangel Micheal are going to be pissed over this?” Helga asked me with her tongue hanging out.

“Fuck em. Any man who shows that much love for a dog doesn’t deserve to be in Hell. Especially not a soldier. I don’t care who they fought for.” I told her then grinned as I scratched her behind the ears. “Besides. How could I send him to Hell with you standing next to me?”

“Thanks boss.” Helga said as she rubbed head against my leg. “I won’t rat you out. I’ll also deal with the Judges.”

“Thanks, but you don’t need to do that. I’ll take the heat if there is any. It’s part of my job. Now, let’s bag our shithead and go home.” I told her. Helga just sniffed and pointed her head towards the gas chambers. “I take it that our shithead just went in the chambers?”

“Yes ma’am. That one has the stench of a thousand souls about him.” Helga grunted as she stalked towards the gas chambers. “I know that I normally won’t ask boss. But can I take a bight out of this fucker before we take him back to face his just reward?”

“You know what. Go ahead and have some fun. I need to pay my respects.” I told her as I turned to walked through the memorial. “Just bring back enough to prove we captured the asshole.”

“I’ll leave enough to collect the bounty boss.” Helga snarled as she took off at a high lope heading for the gas chamber. I could tell that she was going to enjoy this hunt for some reason. It took her less than five minutes to hunt the asshole down and capture him. I could hear the screams from the far side of the confines of the camp.

I might be the Devil’s daughter, but I could tell that the suffering that took place here wasn’t his doing. What happened here was done for the sole purpose of promoting one man’s twisted ideals. The very air smelled of death. I could feel the oppression of those who passed through the gate to Auschwitz. I could hear the silent cries of pain those who were tortured to death. I could even feel the hunger and fear of the children who separated from their parents. I could even feel the deaths of the twins at Joseph Mengele’s hands.

When I finally caught up to Helga she had the escaped down on the ground shaking it like a ragdoll. “Helga I don’t think it is going anywhere.”

“Ssseee rowing roo vish yad winished ear.” Helga mumbled out around the soul.

“Please don’t talk with your mouth full Helga.” I told the Hellhound with a soft chuckle. Then almost told her finish the bitch when I got a look at who she was gnawing on. “How the fuck did that asshole escape?”

“Don’t know, Mistress. All I know is someone dropped the ball here.” Helga spat out then burped. “Sorry about that.”

“Forget about it.” I told her and kicked the female soul in the head. “Maria Mandl they called you the beast. You were lucky when they hanged your ass. I would have sent your ass to an all-male prison in the states and put in in with the general population. I figured the prisons would have gotten ten maybe twelve years of usage out of your ass. Before you kicked the bucket.”

“Do what you will with me your devil’s whore. We were justified in our actions. I don’t care what those race traitors say. Jews cannot be trusted and are subhuman. They are a parasite on all humans. The German people have the right to expand our nation. We are the superior race. All others should bow before us.” The bitch spat out.

“I don’t know how you escaped cunt.” I snarled as I grabbed her by the hair and pulled her to her knees. “But I can guarantee you’ll never escape again.”

As I held her on her knees I summoned my Hell cycle. As it appeared I stuffed her into a soul bag. With it closed and tied to my belt I mounted the cycle. “Helga summon a portal straight to the lowest pit in Hell.”

“You know that if we don’t enter through the gate you’re going to be in trouble with the Judges?” Helga asked as she formed the portal.

“You know what Helga. Those old men can just get over themselves. If I got to drag pieces of shit like this back to Hell. Then I’m going to do things my way. When my aunts and uncles get their shit together. I’ll do things by the damned book. Until then.” I said as I gunned the engine heading for the portal. “They can get used to me playing fast and lose with the rules. The same goes for those shitheads in Heaven as well.”

“I hope you like doing paperwork Mistress.” Helga grunted as she ran next to me as we passed through the portal. “Because you’re going to be in a shit load of trouble with the powers that be.”

“That’s the nice thing about having a tame lawyer. That worm can earn his keep by dealing with them.” I chuckled as we entered the lowest pit in Hell. The heavy stench of sulfur and the cries for mercy assaulted my senses as I came to a stop. Reaching down I opened the soul bag. As I dragged the bitch from the bag she became tangible. With a cruel smile I unfurled my wings and tail. “You know something cunt. Even here this place is far too good for the likes of you. But this is the only place that’ll have your ass. I suggest you get comfortable. Because the next I see you. I’ll just say fuck it and end your worthless existence.”

-----tbc-----