There is Nothing like a Dame A novel by Bronwen Welsh Copyright© 2017 & 2018 Bronwen Welsh A sequel to 'The Might-Have-Been Girl' and 'All the World's a Stage'

Chapter 42  . Mixed emotions

About an hour later, Aunt Peggy and I arrived in Bridchester and drew up outside Emma and David's house. David welcomed Aunt Peggy with a hug, told her how much he appreciated what she was doing for them and introduced her to the children. Penny remembered her from her previous visit, but the two youngest members of the family had no idea who she was. Aunt Peggy is a genius with children and it wasn't long before they seemed quite relaxed with her. I think her Australian accent intrigued them, and gifts of a toy koala and kangaroo to the youngsters, and a necklace with an opal for Penny to acknowledge that she was growing up, were very well received.

They asked if she had seen Mummy and Thomas and when were they coming home? Aunt Peggy handled these questions very diplomatically, saying that she had seen them and that Thomas would come home with Mummy as soon as the doctors said he was well enough. Rather than leave the children alone with a comparative stranger, David said he would stay home the next morning, and I said I would drive up again for the day so that he could go to the theatre for a rehearsal while I stayed with Aunt Peg gy and the girls.Teatime was coming up, so I unloaded Aunt Peggy's suitcase, put it in Thomas's room and bidding everyone goodbye, I drove back to York to make tea for Reggie.

It was wonderful to spend time with Reggie once more. Circumstances had kept us apart far too much, but Reggie was very understanding. I knew I was so lucky to be married to such a marvellous man. Much later when we lay in bed together after the wonder of intimacy, Reggie said to me: “You're very quiet, what are you, thinking”

“Well I can't help wondering if you ever wish you were married to a woman with a regular 'nine to five' job?”

Reggie laughed quietly. “I happen to love you and that's not who you are. We've talked about this before and you must know that I totally understand that you would be miserable if you couldn't go on stage. I'm not jealous of that because I know you will always come back to me.”

I turned to him and hugged him and we fell asleep in each other's arms.

The following morning, after I had made breakfast for us both, and Reggie had left for university, I drove back to Bridchester for the day. Once I arrived, David headed off to the theatre for a rehearsal. Penny had gone to school and both Elizabeth and Stella had obviously taken to Aunt Peggy 'like ducks to water' as the saying goes. I know it's totally ridiculous, but I suddenly felt very jealous of her; me, the person who had suggested in the first place that she come over and look after the children.

Aunt Peggy and I played with the little girls, but it was very obvious to me that I was superfluous to the situation. After lunch, when the girls were put down for their afternoon nap, Aunt Peggy and I sat down for a cup of tea.

“I've become quite envious of you,” said Aunt Peggy. “I'm one of those many people who hate public speaking, even if it's only in front of people that I know. If I have to stand up and give a speech, my heart races and I get sweaty palms. On the other hand, I've seen you in the theatre in Melbourne holding fifteen hundred people in the palm of your hand as you convince them that you really are Juliet, a fourteen year-old girl in love for the first time. You must never tell him I said so, but you brought my husband Ron to the brink of tears in that final scene. That is a very special gift.”

I felt tears start in my eyes:”Aunt Peggy, you are a very wise woman. I know why you told me that story. You saw how I felt this morning and I feel ashamed. You have a very special talent; children just automatically gravitate to you in a way they never would with me and I realise now that that's alright, because we all have our particular talents, and this is yours.”

Aunt Peggy smiled and reaching out, took my hand. “You mustn't be hard on yourself. You're actually a very good aunt and an excellent step-mother. I've had an advantage in that I've brought up two children from birth so I've learned a lot. If you'd been in my shoes, you would have learned it too. None of us can everything we want in life and sometimes we just have to accept that.”

I found myself able to smile too: “I've just realised something Aunt Peggy, and I can't think why I didn't realise it before; you are so very like Mum, which isn't really surprising since you're her sister.”

“Harriet, I know that you miss her, and that's very natural; I miss her too. Perhaps we'll all be together again one day,” she responded.

I felt I was in danger of tearing up again. “Sometimes when I'm onstage and things are going really well, I like to imagine that she's there in the audience and nodding approvingly.” I managed another smile. “I know that sounds crazy and I wouldn't tell anyone else or they'd think I'm going 'ga-ga'.”

Aunt Peggy smiled: “I don't think you're going 'ga-ga' at all, it's a very natural reaction. I'm really looking forward to seeing you onstage again when you come out to Melbourne.”

“Well I'm going to make sure you get the best possible seats, all of you,” I replied, grateful that she had subtly changed the subject.

We finished our tea and I helped her wash up before I headed back to York. It had been an emotional day but a fruitful one for me.

The following couple of weeks I divided between York and Bridchester. After just over a week of chemotherapy, Thomas was allowed a break from his treatment and I picked up him and Emma from the hospital and drove them home. With Thomas reclaiming his own room, Penny had offered to share with Aunt Peggy, so a single bed had been bought for her. It was lucky that the bedrooms in their house were quite large.

I will always have a soft spot for the Apollo Players, not just because their main director is my brother-in-law, but also because they gave me my first rôle on the professional stage.

Outside of the major towns, Bridchester is one of the few places in the country to still have an active professional theatre group. This is largely due to the wonderful support they receive from the town and surrounds and in return, the Players have always tried to put on really entertaining plays, and to look 'outside the box' as they had on this occasion.

Their latest production was 'Summer of the Seventeenth Doll' by the playright Ray Lawler, considered an Australian classic. Set in 1953, two sugarcane cutters, Barney and Roo travel from Queensland to Melbourne in the 'off season' where they spend their 'rest and relaxation' time with two women, Olive and Nancy. Among the gifts they bring annually is a kewpie doll, hence the title of the play. It's a human trait to think that when a tradition is established, it will go on for ever, but this is not necessarily the case. To say more would be to spoil the play for anyone who gets a chance to see it.

“I think it will go well, I certainly hope so,” said David. “It's been produced in England before but not for some years. I hope there's no complaints about the lack of Australian accents.”

Aunt Peggy laughed: “We don't all sound like 'Chips Rafferty',” she said, ironically in her own broad Australian accent. “There's so many migrants in Australia that you can hear almost any accent that exists. I do hope it goes well. You know I've never seen it?”

“Well in that case you must come to a perfomance as my guest,” said David. “The play is actually a part of what's called the 'Doll Trilogy', as there are two prequels, although Lawler wrote them later than the original 'Doll'. If this production goes well, I hope we can present them too.”

“How are ticket sales going?” I asked.

“Really well; our locals are great supporters and we couldn't manage without them. Opening Night is sold out.”

It was arranged that Reggie and I would drive to Brid one evening and Reggie would babysit while Aunt Peggy and I accompanied David to the theatre. It was an excellent performance and I sat there fascinated. It was a real treat for me to be in the audience for a change. At the end when we gave the cast a standing ovation, Aunt Peggy said: “To think I had to come twelve thousand miles to see an Australian play!”

When we saw David after the performance I complimented him on an excellent production. I had noticed that he really took notice of my opinion now, that's what performing with the ISC does for one!

“Do you have any suggestions for improvements?” he asked, and I honestly hadn't and told him so. I could tell that he was really pleased with my response. The only thing that might have made the performance better would have been actors with genuine Australian accents, but rather than try to imitate the accent and fail, as I have heard quite well-known actors do, it was better than they just used their normal speaking voices and let the audience concentrate on the drama. Later, when he pressed me, saying there must surely be something that would have improved the play, that's what I told him and he agreed with my view.

Back in York, Thomas had returned to the hospital for more treatment and some days I spent at the hospital to give Emma a break. Thomas was progressing really well. Some days he was sleeping, and I just sat beside the bed and read, mainly scripts, even 'Romeo and Juliet' for the umpteenth time. Some people might ask why I would do that when I knew the whole script backwards? My reply would be that with a genius like Shakespeare, no matter how many times you read his works, there is always something new to discover.

Other times Thomas was awake and like any child, loved having favourite books read to him, especially as I made up different voices for all the characters. He knew the books by heart and would pull me up if I made the slightest mistake, which I occasionally did deliberately to see if he was alert.

The time was approaching when I would have to leave for America, so I prepared him for my absence.

“You know that I'm an actor, which means that I do things called plays which are telling stories in a big room called a theatre?” I said.

“Daddy does that and Mummy did before I was born,” he responded, once again proving what a smart child he was.

“Well I have to go over the sea to a place called America to do a play for four weeks, so I won't be able to come and see you while I'm gone, but I'll think of you every day and come back as soon as I can,” I said.

“Do you go in an aeroplane?” he said.

“Yes, just like in the book we've been reading,” I replied. “Would you like to go in an aeroplane?”

“Yes please,” he replied and I wondered what I'd let myself in for, realising that children don't take such remarks as something they might like to do sometime in the future What I had said amounted to an invitation to take a plane trip.

“I'll talk to Mummy and Daddy and see if we can go on one when I come back and as soon as you're well,” I said, hoping he'd forget about it but suspecting he wouldn't.

This time I had mixed feelings about my overseas trip. I really didn't want to leave England because of Thomas and also because I had been spending too much time away from Reggie and that worried me as well. However, I knew, especially after my discussion with Richard, my agent, that I had no option but to go, so being a professional, I determined to do the best I could; audiences deserve that.

The last week in England I spent visiting Thomas in hospital, the other children and Aunt Peggy in Bridchester, and always being home with tea cooked when Reggie arrived, being the best wife I could possibly be.

The last night with Reggie, after we had made love, I started crying which of course concerned him and made me furious with myself.

“I'm sorry, darling, I'm just not as good a wife as you deserve,” I sobbed, and Reggie held me tight and comforted me telling me that of course I was a good wife and that he was very proud of me. It was wonderful being held in his arms and I knew I was going to miss that so much. I would have suggested that he fly over for a few days in the middle of the season but he had final exams coming up and I knew that to ask him to interupt his studies would have been selfish. I would just have to tough it out.

To be continued.