"This is the life. Look at us hanging out in style," Tom said smiling.
"You mean with above average beer in the mall and money to spend on entertainment instead of browsing social media?" I remarked.
"Yep. Thanks to our new source of humble wealth. And look at my arm."
He times it right, flexing his biceps just when a few girls were walking past, giving him and annoyed and then an interested look when she thought I wasn't looking. Hah.
"Those beans work differently for you than for me it seems. I got stronger but without the big muscles, just leaner. And my stamina is crazy. I can bike for miles without getting out of breath. I overtook a scooter yesterday. You had to see the look on the guy's face!"
What I didn't tell him was that I lost more weight from around my waist. And my chest started itching recently. I mean, you don't discuss your nipples with your pals, right?
"Have you noticed that counting and remembering stuff is easier?"
"I have. I often figure out the sum of the merchandise I ring up at the register before I scanned everything. Well, almost. I think my boss has this hack on the register that adds a random amount to the total of the purchases. Just a percentage or two if my calculations are correct."
"You work for a skimmer, man."
"Yep. Such is life"
"Can't you quit and live on the seed m-"
"Hush, look. Nigeria on TV."
"... the military report a drone has been lost above the jungle of Nigeria during the investigating of the jungle as part of the quarantine program. As you know, the multiple diseases that wrecked the country in the last 15 years necessitated international cooperation for the creation of a quarantine zone around the entire country and coastal areas.
As you can see in this footage, large numbers of trees have more leaves that are in shaded of dark blue or dark green instead of the normal vibrant green. The scientific community expressed their concern about the growing number of spots in the jungle where this so far unexplained phenomenon is taking place. However, the advanced drone was taken down by what appears to be a primitive man with a wooden spear in want military experts say was a very lucky shot.
More news will follow after the international meeting in Frankfurt to discuss the situation has concluded.
In other news, the dust bowl in the Midwest is expected to arrive at..."
"Your mister Jama has damned good aim," Tom muttered while throwing his empty beer cup in the trash bin.
"Good throw man."
"It's about the only thing you learn at the office."
"Can you come to my work tomorrow? We can get supplies in the shop with employee credit. I have the feeling it's going to be a long trip tomorrow. We can depart at middag. Then I get off shift."
"Right, tomorrow is letter day. Sure, no problem."
"Hey Andy. How’s business?" Tom asked as he walked into the shop.
"The morning rush from the hyperloop commuters is over. I only expect just a few shoppers today but there is nobody here now. Our stuff is behind the counter. Let me open up for your."
"Sheesh Andy, are you expecting a tornado? Look at that pile."
"I'm just so hungry lately."
"Yeah, me too actually. Maybe all that food is a very good idea. I've parked the car in front."
At that moment somebody wearing a balaclava kicked the door in. At least, they tried, but the door opened automatically causing the leg swinger to stumble. The robotic greeter turned and was slowly rolling towards the visitor. The man entering the shop, with a painfully bruised pride and looking for a way to re-establish some dominance, fired a shotgun shell through the bot and into the lemonade rack. That allowed him to enthusiastically pump his shotgun and grin threateningly at Tom and Andy, while small streams of cola and other fizzy beverages were spraying behind him.
"Boyos, we have some business to discuss."
Tom lifted his hands in the air and I was quick to do likewise while cursing my boss. Why had that stupid guy bought the simple open register model instead of the bullet proof glass.
"Andy!" the guy yelled at me. How did that knew my name? I'm not wearing a name tag or something like that. The guy was now slowly pointing the gun to me.
"You have been selling gold," he said. A few more goons came in now. Of course, my greedy friend from the pawn must have gotten even more greedy. I should have expected that. "You thought we wouldn't notice hey? But we found out. You got it delivered. You're getting a letter today. Am I right?"
Andy nodded. "What do you want?! I don't have a stash of gold or money! Do you want that letter?!"
"No, I want your supplier."
"I don't know the supplier! I just get the letter!"
"I thought so. But you'll tell us find the source of the gold," the main robber said smugly while standing in the carbonated carnage.
"But how? I can search for the old letters and give them to you. I swear. But I have to search my room, it's a mess."
"So you don't know that the letters are actually delivered by a seagull. I can see by your gaping faces you don't. You'll see soon enough. The bird arrives at nine thirty. We'll have to see up before then. Jamal, Juan, put our guests in the van and keep them there. Jeff, take that pile of food. No sense in letting it go to waste. Let's go.
The bandits sat behind us in the van casually holding their guns. They drove off and in a few minutes we arrived at my apartment building.
"Get out," the guy behind Tom said.
We scrambled out of the car. I tried to appeal on their humanity.
"Please don't hurt my family. They haven't done anything wrong! They don't know anything!"
"We're not here for your family. We're here for the seagull."
"Seagull?" I asked confused.
"My g**, you're so naive. The seagull brings those letters from overseas. To find out where the gold comes from, we follow the seagull."
"But if the seagull gets the letter here, then how does that bird get the letter in the mailbox?" Tom asked.
"There are a few rats that help," the other bandit said.
"Rats? Don't they know where the gold is? And why rats? I don't get it!" was my intelligent response.
"Our source doesn't know where the rats come from. Just that they help the seagull getting the letter to you. But you need the seagull to get the gold," bandit number three explained.
"So who is your source? The internet?" Tom asked sarcastically.
The bandits were suddenly suspiciously quit and looking at each other. Then two of them started pushing us to the side of the building where there were some trees.
"Move it you two. We have to set up the trap," the guy behind us said roughly.
Three men started to build a trap under the trees while one men kept a gun pointed at the ground before us. It turned out that the trap was a metal mesh they put on some wooden poles just in front of the entrance of the building, where the post boxes where located. They added a little "Cell phone reception measurement, do not touch" card on it. Then they hid back under the trees. After that, the waiting began.
After a bit more than an hour, the seagull landed on the grass. It slowly waddled up to the door. I could also make out a few beady eyes behind the glass of the door, from the rats. Unbelievable! The bird stopped in the middle of the metal mesh where it started eating some dog food one of the men left there. It was of course stolen from the store but was near expiration date so nobody would miss it. The bird seemed to appreciate it anyway.
While the bird was eating peacefully, somebody pushed a button on the remote and the net dropped on the bird. Strangely enough the bird wasn't really startled, like it was expecting this.
When we got closer we could see that the bird was wearing a little white backpack. The robbers didn't waste any time and took the contents out of the little backpack. The robber-in-chief quickly took the little gold nuggets for himself and threw the letter towards Tom and me. Once the backpack was empty, they inserted a cobbled together piece of electronics and lifted the net from the bird. Of course the seagull quickly scrambled away, probably cursing us with it's loud cries and flew away to the ocean.
Comments
OK
Color me lost.
Strike
Yes, I feel like a substitute writer during the Hollywood writer strike now. It's building up to some world changing events but it's a roundabout way.
So our two "birds"
really were clueless to the gull post delivery.
Someone who could arrange such an unlikely postal service would surely have safeguards in place to prevent hijacks or tracking?
Teri Ann
"Reach for the sun."
Interesting delivery mechanism
I'm wondering if there is a reason for it. One thing I do suspect though is the robbers will fail miserably.