A month later, a lot has happened. First, I got a new Yu-gi-oh deck called Geargia. It’s pretty cool and I am now second place in my school. Not only that my friends have a thing going on in Study hall where we sit on a round table and play Yu-gi-oh. We always play big team battles that we never quite finish at thirty minutes. McVie is being an asshole as always. He’s been picking on me lately and getting onto me. Kerry and James have been a bunch of fun lately on the internet. We started playing a game called ‘Unturned’. A blocky zombie game. It’s fun if you like Minecraft and zombies. A cool new anime has come out. It’s called Tokyo Ghoul. I absolutely love the opening song. I think my favorite character so far is Touka Kirishima. She’s a real badass bitch with a cute delicate side. I love a tough girl with sensitivity. I stopped going to the tournaments. Some of the people there are complete assholes. I can’t stand them. A guy actually tried to hit me because I was taking my time. Jeez dude, if it wasn’t for the fact he was too slow. It would’ve hurt. Besides keeping up with anime. I have down very much besides going through the motions of routine.

Another month later, OH MY GOD. Tokyo Ghoul is the coolest thing ever. I don’t want to spoil things, but the last episode made me love crazy. Karman and I have been going at it in Yu-gi-oh. Kerry, James, me and a bunch of their other friends decided to make a thing called the ‘Bruh Society’. What was a joke, was now more than that. Speaking of McVie. He’s really been on my ass. A computer acted up and he immediately blamed it on the three of us. Mostly looking at me. Really unfair. I mean computers can act up at any time. Especially old computers. Halloween rolled around and I didn’t have any costume bought, so I went as the scariest thing known to man. Me. People were pretty freaked out by that.

Two months later. I have been on an anime marathon lately. Just binge watching them like a boss. I’ve been growing my hair out. I want it to look like Touka’s hair. Or at least similar to it. Thanksgiving was pretty great. I’m always eating at my Uncle Kevin’s house. I swear he’s gay, so does my dad. The colder months are hell on the bus. Because of how old the bus is. A lot of the windows don’t shut all the way. I move my computer upstairs into my room for more privacy. I used mom’s table that just so happens to fit perfectly in the room. I now have two screens for my computer. I got sick the first day of winter break. I’m so unfortunate. I got a lot of stuff for Christmas. One notable thing is a cell phone. I did have a cell phone before, but it was the boring flip phone.

New Year’s Eve was shit. I didn’t stay up for the passing of 2014. I just wanted it to end so I can get passed this year. All of this year sucked major shit. Starting with the fact I gained a traumatic life event at the very beginning. I even cried myself to sleep New Year’s Eve just to end it quick.

A month later. Dad planned a trip to Cleveland to see the rock and roll hall of fame. I’m not really into music like my dad and Caleb are. We aren’t supposed to go into April. Hardass McVie was being soft all this month. Maybe it’s because everyone needed to get back into the swing of things. Tokyo ghoul season two came on. The first episode was cool. I don’t really like the opening music choice. Jason and I decided to plan for a con in February. Team Four Star is supposed to be there. I can’t wait.

Three weeks later. McVie brought in these giant robot arms. They were pretty cool. He told me I could work on learning them. Two things I learned from working on them is that they are cool as fuck and the computers are too slow to handle the program for the robot arms. I’m making due with it.

The day before the anniversary of mom’s death. I really don’t want to go to school. I want to go back to bed and cry, but I have to do my normal routine. I go to the backroom and throw everything off. I look in the mirror. Tears start falling down my face. No, not right now. I got stuff to do. I wipe off my tears and took my shower.

The school was as noisy as ever. I zipped up my jacket, pulled my hood over my head, and took off my glasses and threw them in a box in my bag. I did want to be seen or see anything today. I just want to be left alone and be invisible. I sat alone on a seat in the hall not daring to go into the cafeteria. Tears start falling as I go into the fetal position.

“What’s wrong.” Says a man’s voice.

I didn’t even look at him to respond, “Nothing, I just want to be left alone.”

“If it’s nothing then why are you sitting here crying.”

“I said,” raising my voice a little louder and turning to look him straight in the eyes as I said angrily through my teeth, “Leave. Me. Alone.”

“Alright, fine, I get it. You can always talk to me if you need me.”

The bell rings and I walk to my first period. I bump into someone, but I don’t care. I feel a hand grab me by the shoulder. I did even see who it was. I just smashed my elbow into the guy’s jaw, knocking him out. All I see is black the next second.

When I gain consciousness, I was being held down by two guys. “What the hell happened? Why are you holding me?”

“Finally, you came to.” Mr. Jefferson says as he stands over me. “You can let him go now. He won’t do that again. Chase, follow me.” I follow Mr. Jefferson into and sit down in a chair in front of his desk.

“So, what happened?”

“I can’t explain it to you. I gotta show you.” He turns on a tv monitor and plays a video of a kid going kung fu on everyone around him. Everyone besides the unlucky victims run away. The kid stands there and looks into the camera. There was no soul in him. It was like he was some type of animal. Then I look closely and I realize. That’s me.

“What do you remember last?”

“I remember being really depressed and angry. I just wanted to be left alone. Then some douche had to grab my shoulder. I did even care who it was. I just smashed my elbow into his face. After that, darkness.” The tears start rolling down hard. I can’t believe I could be so animalistic.

“Well, the darkness was your rampage. You’re lucky that everyone was only knocked out and fine for the most part.” He hands me a tissue as I cry. I’m such a monster. “Well, we can safely say that the person on the screen wasn’t you.”

“B-b-but it w-was m-me.” I sob.

“No, Chase. That person on the screen is a psycho that had no morals or care for human life. You, on the other hand, are crying because you have a care for human life.” My eyes go wide. Then I almost tackle the guy. I wailed on his clothes.

“Thank you… Thank you… Thank you.” I repeated.

The school sent me home after that. I just fell into my bed and cried for the rest of the day.