Lucky Shot
by shalimar
copyright 1968, 1990, 2001, 2007
A soldier lost less and more than he expected.
Suddenly shots came from every direction as the troop was on patrol in the jungle. Everyone in the troop took cover and returned fire.
"Medic! I've been hit!" shouted one of the soldiers.
With his medical kit the medic bravely dove toward his wounded comrade.
"Where?" asked the medic.
"In my leg. Damn it hurts."
The medic quickly took gauze from his bag and bound up the wound enough that his friend would not bleed to death. He then attached an IV bottle to the wounded soldier. He stayed with his friend until the shooting stopped. Seeing that his wounded comrade was in pain he gave his friend some morphine. Finally, after the shooting stopped, the medic was able to call in a helicopter.
As the wounded soldier was being lifted to the helicopter he complained, "My leg, it hurts!"
It was a short helicopter ride to the MASH unit where the soldier was triaged and finally brought into the operating room.
"What ever you do doc," demanded the soldier as the doctor put him under the anesthetic. "Save my leg."
A few hours later as the soldier was groggily coming out of the operation’s anesthesia he noted that he felt that something was missing down below. Slowly opening his eyes he discovered the operating doctor studying his chart.
"Did you have to cut off my leg, Doc?" asked the soldier.
The doctor looked up from the chart and said, "You never had a problem with your leg, miss."
***
This story is the opposite of one I heard during the Vietnam War.
Happy Armistice/Veteran's Day
Comments
Hummmmm?
Ouch, that could hurt!!
Combat Wounds
This was a popular joke back in the 'Nam. Gallows humor often got us through some rough times. Thanks for bringing it up to date.
There Was A Joke
A guy was walking down the street and he sees an old friend.
"Hello Bill, how are you?"
"I'm very well, but I've changed my name to Lucky."
"Oh, why is that?"
"Well,you remember that train crash a couple of months ago, when only one guy got out alive. That was me, so I changed my name to Lucky."
"Sounds reasonable."
A couple of months later the first guy saw his friend again and said "Hello Lucky."
The second guy said "Now you must call me Lucky Lucky."
"Oh, why is that?"
"Well,you remember that recent plane crash when there was only one survivor? That was me."
"That sure sounds like a good reason to change your name."
Another few months passed and guy number one sees his friend in the street again.
"Hello, Lucky Lucky." he says.
"Oh no, now I am Lucky Lucky Lucky."
"Why is that?"
"Well I picked up this girl in a bar and she invited me back to her flat, which was on the first floor and we were making mad passionate love. Unbeknown to us the man in the flat below was cleaning his rifle and it accidentally discharged and the bullet came through the ceiling and shot off my left testicle."
"My God, what was lucky about that?"
"If it had happened thirty seconds earlier he'd have got me right between the eyes."