Later that night Mika was laying in bed in a pink night shirt that was in her drawer when she heard her father, “Is he still pretending to be a girl?” in a shout.
“How can you be such an asshole?” Mary shouted back. “She’s our child. But all you care about is your damn job anyway so what do you care?”
“Well it’s my damn job that buys that sissy all his fucking clothes,” his father yelled back.
“And my career doesn’t mean shit to you does it? I sacrificed everything so you could rub elbows with those balding fatasses-” was all Mika could stand to listen to. She grabbed the earplugs she kept on her nightstand and crammed them into place. It wasn’t as though her parents fought all the time, but whatever it was they were fighting about, it was always extremely loud.
This time though it cut deep. This was the reaction she was afraid of. She started to cry as she covered her face with her pillow.
“I wish I was born a girl,” she sighed deeply. “I wish he’d just fucking leave,” she sobbed.
A few moments later her door opened slightly, “Mika? You awake Princess?” her mother asked.
Mika peeked out from under her pillow. She could barely hear her mother because of the earplugs, but she quickly pulled them out when she saw her there.
Mary sat on the edge of Mika’s bed, “He left..” She was almost in tears herself.
“Good,” Mika growled. “He’s never loved me even when he thought I was a boy.”
“Don’t say that Princess, your dad.. he always loved you.” Mary was playing with Mika’s hair, which seemed longer than she remembered.
“All he cares about is money, or his job, or his colleagues. I bet that business dinner tonight was to honor some jerk who probably fired a bunch of minimum wage workers to save a half percent on the bottom-line,” Mika sighed. “I hope he stays gone this time,” she hissed.
Mary kissed Mika’s forehead, “Want some hot cocoa sweetie?”
Mika just nodded a little. She was too angry to say anything else. She didn’t want to make her mother more upset than she already was. Besides, cocoa made everything better. She sat up and slid off her bed, her feet dropping right into a pair of pink fuzzy bunny slippers
Mary smiled as she went down into the kitchen to make them some cocoa, “Sorry you had to hear all that Princess.”
“If that’s how he really feels about me, then I really hope he stays gone because I’m not changing for him,” she sighed. “If anything it makes me want to reconsider going to school as Mika.”
She paused, verbally at least, as she followed her mother. She had absolutely no idea why she just blurted that out. The thought of going to school as Mika terrified her. Just today the thought of someone seeing her squeal over a new pair of shoes terrified her even.
“You know your therapist said whenever you were ready, she was ready to sign off on you going to school as Mika.”
“I should’ve done it already, instead of putting it off,” Mika said, again, not sure why she said it. “I guess fear of how you’d react, how Dad would react, is what kept me from being honest sooner. Without Crystal and Lindsey’s support I wouldn’t have lasted as long as I did.”
“And Angela,” Mary teased as she poured water into the hot beverage maker’s reservoir.
“And Angela,” Mika giggled a little as she echoed. “I called her Mom today. Not like, replacing you Mom, but like, my other Mom.”
Mary laughed, “You and Crystal are awfully close. I don’t mind at all.”
That moment Mary’s cell phone rang it was Angela.
“I’ll finish this,” Mika said as Mary glanced down at her phone and nodded. She didn’t bother to check the Caller ID, expecting it to be her husband trying to apologize.
“You’re spending the night in a hotel after that display mister,” she said sternly.
“Mary? It’s me Angela.. Not Christopher.” she teased.
“Oh,” Mary laughed a bit. “Sorry. I should’ve checked it first. Hi Angel,” she said, leaving off the ‘a’. “We were just talking about you.”
“It’s ok, but Chris ran over our mailbox, I wanted to see if you were ok.” Angela asked, “I just called the cops too.”
“Jesus, are you serious? I knew he was pissed off, but...” she sighed.
“Yeah he slammed the mailbox with the car, and peeled out in the yard, taking off.” Angela sighed.
“You did the right thing. Maybe a night in jail will make him rethink his priorities. I know it’s late Angel, but do you think you could come over for a little bit?”
“Sure, my husband did the same thing when he found out Crystal liked girls.. never came home though.” Angela sighed, “I’ll bring Crystal with me if that’s ok?”
“Oh I’m sure that would make Mika’s night,” Mary teased. “I know she heard the fight; I’d be surprised if the whole damn neighborhood didn’t-” she paused as someone knocked hard on the front door.
“Police department,” a woman’s voice called loudly.
“Sorry Angel, I have to go. The police are here,” she trailed off, realizing Mika was already halfway to the door.
Mika pulled the door open to find two cops, both female, standing at the door with their cruiser lights flashing just behind them in the driveway.
“We’re responding to a 9-1-1 call of a domestic disturbance,” the taller, brunette officer said. “May we come in?”
“Yes, yes of course,” Mika said, motioning for the officers to come inside. “Mom, the police are-” she said, turning around and cutting herself off as she realized Mary was right behind her. “... Oh.”
“Ma’am, is everything alright?” the officer asked. “Your neighbors said they could hear screaming and some verbal threats being made regarding you and your daughter.”
“Yes, we’re both okay. My husband Christopher,” she trailed off, sighing deeply. She tried to keep it together, but she just couldn’t. Mika frowned angrily.
“He’s a homophobic ass who flipped out about me coming out,” she said matter-of-factly. Mary nodded.
“He ended up in my friend Angela’s front yard after driving over her mailbox. She also called 9-1-1 about it.”
The two officers glanced at each other and the shorter blonde woman answered, “That explains the other call. We were on our way to investigate when we got the disturbance call so we diverted here first.”
Over the cop radio a dispatcher stated, “We have an 11-83 code 3 I repeat an 11-83 on Madison and Walton ave, Code 3, any unit respond.”
“That’s a few blocks from here,” the brunette officer said to her partner, grabbing her radio as the shorter blonde turned to Mary.
“We’ll come back to take your statements shortly if you decide you want to press charges.” She quickly turned to race after her partner, who was now already halfway to the cruiser.
Angela and Crystal walked over after the cop car sped off, “What the heck?” Crystal asked looking at Mika, “Cute shirt, you should wear it to the next sleep over.”
Mika shrugged a little. “Thanks. No idea what that was about though - 11-83-something-another not far from here. One of the neighbors called the cops after they heard Dad screaming,” she sighed deeply, wrapping her arms around Crystal and sinking into her shoulder. “He flipped.”
“Aww,” Crystal said as she held Mika tight. “Believe me I understand. When Dad found out I like girls he did the same thing. Last we heard he was dodging alimony in South America or something.”
“Want some hot cocoa?” Mika asked timidly. “Or coffee... Tea... Soda-” Crystal put a finger to her friend’s lips and giggled.
“Cocoa’s fine.”
As she turned, Mika realized there was a young girl watching them. She was across the road so she didn’t get a good look at her, but the child seemed to be about six years old. She was sitting on a Barbie pink bike with no helmet. She waved as the girls walked inside.
“Did you see that?” Mika gasped.
“See what?” Crystal asked.
“That little girl..” Mika sighed. “She looked just like Luci.”
Crystal blinked, looked at her friend, and then went back to look out the window. There wasn’t anyone there now, so she shrugged. “I don’t see anyone. Why?”
“Nevermind.” Mika shrugged and walked inside with Crystal.
~oOo~
It was late, somewhere around 10:30, when another knock came at the door. Mika and Crystal were in the living room with their mothers. They had been talking for a good two hours, since the incident.
“I’ll get it,” Mika said. “It’s probably the cops come back to get our statement or something,” she sighed, walking to the door. The brunette officer that had visited earlier was standing in the doorway, looking rather dour.
“Yes?” Mary said as she came up behind Mika and put her hands on her shoulders.
“Ma’am, does your husband drive a black SUV, Tennessee license plate MDA-757?”
“Oh God, you found him? He didn’t do anything stupid did he?”
“Ma’am,” the officer said softly. “Is there somewhere your daughter can stay for a short time? I’m afraid I need to ask you to come down to the county morgue...” she trailed off, not wanting to say more in front of Mika.
“Oh God,” Mika whispered, turning to bury her face in her mother’s chest.
Mary nodded, “She and her friend can stay here with Angela..”
Both Crystal and Angela approached now, managing to pry Mika away from her mother just long enough for her to latch onto them. The officer frowned softly. “I’m so sorry,” she said quietly. “We don’t actually know if it’s your husband or not because he didn’t have any ID on him, but the registration matches, so we need you to ID the body,” she explained, as Mika was quickly escorted away from the conversation.
“It’s my fault,” Mika whispered, choking back tears as Angela and Crystal brought her back to the living room.
Angela looked right at Mika, “It’s not your fault sweetie, never think that ok?”
“Mom’s right,” Crystal added. “He freaked out. He left, and he acted like a jackass. You can’t blame yourself for his mistakes.”
“I wished he’d never come back though,” she managed through tears. “And everything else came true too... Now this,” she sobbed. Crystal looked at her mother, not sure what to say to the ‘everything else came true’ part. Crystal than just hugged Mika tightly.
Angela nodded, “I’ll talk it over with Mary when she comes back, but I don't think you girls should go to school tomorrow.”
Crystal looked over at Mika, “Want me to go with you and see Doctor Sweets tomorrow then? After we can go to the mall?”
“I need to talk to my therapist too.” She paused a moment and laughed a little, cracking a small smile. “You know I still don’t get how you girls can spend hours and hours shopping.” Mika sighed.
“It’s about the journey,” Crystal said as she hugged Mika again. “But we can go back to my house and watch movies instead - whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“I heard that first part before. Becca said it somewhat the same way.” Mika giggled, “But no its ok I need a new pair of running shoes.”
“Yay! I do too actually,” Crystal said as she poured Mika a fresh cup of cocoa. “I’m glad you’re starting to feel a little better sweetie,” she added as she sat down at the dining room table. “Please, please don’t take this the wrong way, but... your dad was an asshole.”
“It’s impolite to speak ill of those that can’t defend themselves,” Angela said from the kitchen door, but sighed. “But she’s right that you shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened.”
Mika nodded, “He hated me, so I agree Mom.” she called back to the kitchen.
“I think he hated everyone - including himself,” Angela answered softly. “Something like this was honestly inevitable.”
“I can’t bring myself to cry for the loss of my dad..” Mika sighed. Crystal started to giggle a little and Mika looked up at her. “What?” she asked. Crystal giggled again.
“I just realized. You get to have the last laugh.”
“Huh?” Mika asked.
“You don’t own a black dress, so we need to go and get you one when we go get our running shoes, so you can wear it to the funeral as a final ‘fuck you’.”
Mika giggled a bit and nodded. “I tried you know, to be the best son and the best daughter he could have.” She shrugged and sipped her cocoa.
Crystal stood up, taking Mika’s hand and pulling her up into a hug. “You ARE the best daughter he could have had. It’s his fault that he couldn’t see that. That’s what I’ll mourn, for him and for you, but you do still have our Moms.”
Mika stared into Crystal’s eyes for several seconds until finally, she couldn’t resist the overwhelming urge to kiss her anymore. It was soft and sweet, delicate and loving, but brief. She lay her head on Crystal’s shoulder and cried. Crystal held her tightly without saying a word, but she had a big smile on her face. She couldn’t help herself.
“What took you so long?” Crystal finally whispered in Mika’s ear.
“I was scared?” Mika blushed, “I didn’t want to ruin our friendship you know.”
“Well, you didn’t,” Crystal giggled, cupping Mika’s cheek in her hand and kissing her back. “I’ve thought about that night under the big tree every single day since, when I had a chance to kiss you and didn’t take it. I thought I blew it.”
Mika laughed a little, shaking her head. “Every time you hold my hand to scare off some jock, my heart skips a beat. But what’re you going to do now? If I start going to school as Mika...” she trailed off as Crystal kissed her again.
“Then I’ll just have to stop being scared,” she said with a smile. “If you’re going to be you, then I need to have the courage to be me too.”
Mike smiled, “Thank you Crystal.”
Comments
Well if her wishes
were coming true, it would be the happy ones too. The Father caused his own problems, driving in the red Zone,
Goddess Bless you
Love Desiree
and if I had some
way of stopping this double posting I would be happier, though it always seems to happen on a story that deserves a double comment. So thank you for a wonderful story.
Goddess Bless you
Love Desiree
It was bound to happen
I didn't expect this but well in a way it's for the better now Mika doesn't have to deal with bigotry at home. Also she gets to have her best friend as her GirlFriend too which is nice & they can be themselves.
Love Samantha Renee Heart
I know life is what it is...
...and I make my own choices. I would, however, just once like to not be scared.
Love, Andrea Lena
Blaming Oneself...
...in a situation like this is (from what I've read) certainly common enough in the real world, especially for a young person. But as Mika says here, there's more to this one:
“I wished he’d never come back though,†she managed through tears. “And everything else came true too... Now this,†she sobbed.
Don't know whether or not we'll find out -- and if so, whether it turns out to be her own (unconscious) doing or that of someone else (e.g., Luci) that's picking up her thoughts. But this particular event seems like a figurative case of burning down a house to roast a pig, something easier to expect from something like the irrational part of one's brain on the one hand or, on the other, a magic-user too immature -- or uncaring about humans in general -- to cavil at killing off a perceived villain. (But we've been told that Luci doesn't seem to be as young or immature as she looks.)
True, our authors do their best to portray Dad as, in one character's words, "an asshole". But that isn't a capital offense. (I was reminded of the flashback scene in Ursula LeGuin's Lathe of Heaven, where the hero, as a youth, discovers that he's killed off a disagreeable aunt to avoid her paying his family a visit.)
Eric
DK, Zoe......
I'd say this sets the stage for Mika's "coming out". I guess Lucy's Been working her magic, I wonder when Mika will figure that out. Ok Ladies, hurry back with the next installment please? Big Hugs Taarpa
More changes...
...and it looks as though Luci's the causative agent - although given her sudden appearance and disappearance plus ability to bend reality, I'm guessing that rather than being a mere magic user, she's a deity of some description with a bigger agenda than merely easing Mika's transition. With both Mika and Crystal's mums now single, I wouldn't be in the least bit surprised ifshe's got plans to make one big happy family - albeit one with two mums at the helm...
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!