As I fastened the silver mesh choker around my throat, I mused about my life as a Vampire Slaying Pretty Princess. I didn't start out that way, far from it. I cast my mind back to that night...

I had been working late at the office as was usual, and the streets were empty when I left. This should have cued me in that things were going odd, as the streets were busy all the time, no matter what hour of what date. Then my car sputtered and quit just as I reached a long section of street with just one dimly working street light. It was dark at that time of night, being the end of October. I gave an exasperated sigh, and pulled out my cell, only to see the dreaded "no service" notice.

I muttered a few choice curse words, and got out of the car to walk to someplace with cell service. As I walked, I heard a voice cry out from a nearby alley. It sounded like somebody really needed help, and I had always been cursed with a hero complex.

As I ran into the alley, I looked around warily for an ambush. There was only one person in there, a guy about as tall as me, and looking like he had last seen sun in the eighties. He seemed to be unarmed but also unhurt. I stopped abruptly and gave him a nasty look.

"Look buddy," I said, "I don't know what your game is, but I'm in no mood for ".

He cut me off by moving impossibly quickly, picking me up and pinning me to the grimy alley wall as if I weighed nothing. He smiled at me, showing two long, pointed fangs. His eyes turned a solid blood red as he said "Not what I was hoping for in a meal, so I will make ... adjustments."

After saying that, he said some words that hurt my ears, made my vision blur, and my mind swim. When things settled back down, he smiled again, and said "Much better."

As his fangs just penetrated the surface of my neck, a female voice cried out something that distracted him and made him quit biting me and turn around. I didn't catch what she said, as I was rapidly discovering that my body felt different.

The person that had distracted him staked him as he turned. I was unceremoniously dropped, and slid down to a sitting position with my back to the wall. I looked down at my body, and saw that I wasn't a 50's something, overweight, out of shape, male cubical jockey. My clothing was still the same, but the body underneath it!

It was a young woman that had saved my life, and she said "Hey, are you okay? He didn't bite you deep did he?" I looked up at her, and was momentarily bemused by the fact that she was dressed in a ... princess outfit? She bent forward and said "Naw, it's just a flesh wound. A little holy water, and you'll just have an interesting little pair of scars."

As she helped me up, I stuttered "B..but I'm a woman now..."

"Yeah, and about my age too, I'd judge." she said, "That was this vampire's fallback. He preyed on about 21 year old women, but if they weren't available, he'd change whoever was to fit the bill with magic. That magic sinature was what we used to track him down finally."

I started to say there was no such thing as vampires or magic even then, but the brush of my clothing against certain new parts drove home the fact that there had to be.

"Well, I can't just leave you on the street. And you sure can't go back to your old life." she said, "Come on, I'll take you to one of our Vampire Slaying Pretty Princess safe houses. We'll set you up with a new I.D. Heh, after this, you could even join us."

It took years, and lots of therapy sesssions, and even a little magic help with my mind to settle me into my new life. It seemed that the spell that changed my body could only be removed or reversed by the one that had cast it. And he was dust now. Also, my new body didn't age and had a capacity for magic.

My mind came back to the present and I checked myself in the mirror. It turned out that I had done exactly as my rescuer had half joked. The princess outfits served as a distractgion factor both for the vampire, and for any witnesses. I looked every inch the Pretty Pretty Princess now, and the choker hid the two small fang scars. I smiled grimly as I hefted my stake in one hand, and my functioning magic wand in the other.

The gods had better have pity on any vampires I encountered tonight, because I was fresh out of it.