Notes:

1. I am aware that the devs claim that everything from 2.0 through Dawntrail has taken less than a year, and I call bullshit. Plot mentions of transit time (four months sailing to Doma, three months to Sharlyan) reveals this to be dev laziness, pure and simple. You can't tell me I ended a 1000 year war, liberated two nations on different continents from their colonial oppressors, traveled to an alternate dimension to prevent a future where I died, went to the moon and the literal edge of existence to stop the end of the world, and traveled the length and breadth of the fantasy equivalent of North and South America... All in less than one year. No. Absolutely not. No way.
So I'm ignoring that. My personal headcanon is that it's been as long in-game as it's been in the real world. Ish.

2. My WoL is a non-binary viera.

3. Follow my in-progress writing ramblings on Bluesky: @ashthestampede.bsky.social | Support my writing on Patreon & read ongoing chapters of my original works 2 months before they're released anywhere else: patreon.com/ashkreider

GHIMLYT

The war camp was a flurry of preparations. It took effort to keep my expression light as I made my way through the camp to the final strategy meeting before the assault, not wanting the rank and file to see their vaunted "Champion of Eorzea" as anything other than the fearless paragon I was supposed to be.

How was I supposed to be a symbol of hope when I was struggling to hold onto it myself?

Were the others here, we could have easily held off half an Imperial Legion with just Scions alone, but now only two of us remained to take the field. Would it be enough?

After all, Papalymo wasn't here to pull a rabbit out of his hat this time.

"Please, Hydaelyn. Let that damnable voice stay away until after the battle is finished," I muttered to myself, making a furtive gesture of warding.

Alisaie appeared out of the hustle and bustle, falling into step beside me. "Ready to frighten some Garleans?" she asked with breezy self-assurance, giving me a smile that was equally parts teasing and challenging.

Gods. She really had changed so much in the two years we'd known each other, hadn't she? When we'd first met in Ul'dah, she'd been a surly teenager so uncertain of her identity that she'd settled for being a pale imitation of her twin, despite being entirely unsuited to being a scholar or an Arcanist. And now here she was, a Red Mage nearly on par with my own strength, and a seasoned campaigner to boot.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Shit. I hadn't meant to stare. "I'm just. I'm glad you're here," I said awkwardly.

Alisaie blushed and looked away. "Well I couldn't very well abandon you, could I?"

I smiled. "And I'm grateful to have you at my back, but I do feel rather naked without the other Scions here."

"I wouldn't mind seeing that," Alisaie quipped, mischief dancing in her eyes as she looked back up at me with a suggestive smile.

Unaccountably, I tripped over my own foot.

Alisaie grinned at my discomfort and broke into a jog. "Come on then," she called over her shoulder. "Or they'll get started without us!"

My heart thudded painfully in my chest as I stared after her for a long moment.

What the hell had just happened?

- - -

It says a lot about the life I've lived since coming to Eorzea that Garlean invasions were starting to feel old hat, but. Well.

Hien and Yugiri talked me up to their countrymen, whose contingent I would be fighting with. Raubahn gave the usual stirring speech. And then it was over, and all there was left to do was wait.

When the council was over, Raubahn joined Pippin in his futile attempts to convince Nanamo to retire from the field while the other worthies scattered to attend to their own business, once more leaving me alone with Alisaie.

"I should be terrified," she mused, crossing her arms as she surveyed the rest of the camp. "But with you at our side, I can't help but feel everything is going to be all right."

I shrugged, unable to muster any other response, and she turned to pin me with a glare.

"So don't you dare leave me alone."

My stomach did a slow swan dive as I stared into her piercingly blue eyes, and I only belatedly remembered to nod.

That seemed to satisfy her, at least. "No matter what happens, we have to survive," she said in a steely voice. "Together."

Was I blushing? I might have been blushing. "I promise," I said hoarsely.

Alisaie nodded jerkily, then turned away as she self-consciously made a show of checking her equipment.

I did the same as I wrestled with my feelings.

What in the hells was I thinking? Alisaie was a... Well, technically she wasn't a child, but at my age, using the fact that she was eighteen to justify any kind of relationship would be nothing but rank sophistry, and we both knew it.

"I have to get my head back in the game," I muttered to myself, scrubbing my hand across my face.

And then, without warning, that electric, obliterating pain was back - like someone was trying to yank my soul out through my nostrils.

:THE LIGHT WILL EXPUNGE ALL LIFE.:

"No!" Alisaie gasped, turning back toward me. She staggered, clutching her skull in pain. "Not now!"

:ONLY YOU CAN FORESTALL THE CALAMITY.:

Pain. Pain and fear and pain, and panic in Alisaie's eyes that mirrored my own. "Don't," I gasped. She reached for me, and I struggled to reach back, the movement causing bolts of agony to cascade down my arm. "You can't--"

:THROW. WIDE. THE GATES.:

Alisaie's face was a mask of anguish. "Not like--"

She collapsed like a puppet with her strings cut, and the voice vanished as it made off with its prize. I crawled over - when had I fallen? - and pulled her into my lap. She was breathing, thank the Gods. But I knew that I was holding nothing more than an empty shell.

I was alone.

- - -

AMH ARENG

I'd finally arrived at Journey's Head, only to be told that Alisaie wasn't there. So back into the sands I went.

The sky was too damned bright in the First, and the reflection off the sand was nearly blinding. I should have sent Feo Ul to the Source to request a pair of smoked glasses from Tataru before setting out from the Crystarium, but it was too late for that now.

How typically Alisaie to hare off to the literal edge of the world in search of adventure after finding herself stranded in an alien world.

I could have waited, I suppose. But despite the Exarch's promise that my friends were whole and well, I needed to see her. I needed to know that she-- that they were all okay.

I spent a good twenty minutes trudging through the sands, sword and focus at the ready, before I finally spotted the tell-tale flurry of alabaster wings. However, before I could move to intercept, a familiar voice rang out from somewhere above me. I looked up just in time to see someone leap from the top of an old watch tower, some twenty-five feet up, to plunge a long blade into the sin eater's back.

Alisaie!

I was seized with relief so intense that for a moment I felt dizzy. She was okay!

Better than okay, actually. I'd never seen her make a leap like that before, and there was more strength behind her blows as she took on the weakened sin eater.

I clapped as she finished the monster with a final well-placed thrust. "Impressive!"

"Just a lesser eater," Alisaie she said with studied diffidence, keeping her back to me as she sheathed her blade. "Nothing to write home about."

"Not happy to see me then?" I teased.

"I knew you'd turn up sooner or later, but I had been hoping for sooner," she shot back, her smile as wry as ever.

The fact that she'd be angry with me for distracting her while out on patrol was the only thing that kept me from sweeping her into a giant hug. As it was, I knew I was grinning stupidly and didn't much care. "It's so good to see you."

Alisaie turned away, ostensibly to study the horizon, but the set of her shoulders betrayed her fraying control over her emotions. "Come on then. We can catch up after we finish patrolling."

- - -

Tesleen lit up when she saw us return together. Tesleen and Alisaie were obviously close, because Tesleen immediately started needling her friend extensively about how much she'd missed me, and Alisaie didn't once threaten to stab her.

"I respect Savvel's methods!" Alisaie finally cried, throwing her hands up in disgust.

Tesleen's laughter echoed around the small shelter, and then the conversation took a turn I hadn't expected. "After seeing them in action, I can understand why. The way they leap into the fray without hesitation, it really is something to behold! I might be a little smitten myself!"

Alisaie turned red right up to her hairline and stalked off.

There was a long silence as Tesleen watched me with a knowing look.

"Smitten," I said flatly.

It wasn't a question, but the blonde carer heard what I was asking anyway. "I said I was a little smitten. Her feelings go well beyond that."

I swallowed as I recalled the way she'd smiled in the Ghimlyt camp when she said she wanted to see me naked.

Oh. Oh.

Oh no.

- - -

I tossed and turned that night, plagued by dreams of sin eaters in Garlean uniforms, and woke feeling tired and grumpy.

Over breakfast, we were asked to acquire some supplies at the market, so off we went - the Champion of Eorzea and their heroic companion - to slay the dreaded provision beast. Thankfully, the need to be on the lookout for flying eaters precluded any awkward conversations about feelings, and we fell easily into our old rhythm as we made the hour long trek to the Suq, only relaxing once we'd passed through its thick stone walls.

Our needs were simple. Fresh fruit, particularly nectarines. But Alisaie looked so sad as she carefully packed the delicate fruit into her bag that I realized there had been a hidden significance to the request that I had missed entirely.

"Alisaie..." I began, placing a hand on her shoulder. When she didn't shake it off, I drew her into a hug, thinking only to offer comfort.

However, instead of resisting, Alisaie threw her arms around my neck and hauled me into a deep kiss.

It felt like being struck by lightning. I gasped as her lips moved on mine, parted them reflexively when she licked into her mouth. She pulled herself tightly against me and kissed me like I was the only thing keeping her from drowning, and everything fell away but the feeling of her soft lips and our tongues sliding against one another.

I may have moaned in her mouth.

Which may, had it happened, have emboldened her. Or it may have simply been her own initiative that led to her grab my butt.

With a groan, I broke the kiss and held her at arm's length. "We can't do this," I said sternly, even as the sight of her kiss-swollen lips made me want to kiss her more.

Alisaie took this as well as expected, which is to say not well. "Why not?" she demanded, her expression thunderous.

"You're a child." I'd meant to sound implacable. Unyielding. But my voice came out thin and pleading.

"I'm not a child," she shot back heatedly. "For the love of Thaliak, did you forget the extra year I lived here? I'll be twenty in a few weeks!"

"That doesn't make it right," I growled. My face was on fire, which I can't imagine helped my argument much. "You're so much younger than me."

Alisaie gave ground - it definitely wasn't a retreat - crossed her arms, and glared at me. "Oh and that makes me too impressionable, does it?" she scoffed. "Do you seriously think you could make me do anything I didn't want to do?"

No. I didn't. But I wasn't going to tell her that.

Alisaie's eyes narrowed. "Tell me you don't want me, and I'll drop it," she said in glacial tones.

Shit. Fuck. Shit. There was no point in denying it - she'd know I was lying. She always knew. "Tesleen is waiting," I finally said helplessly.

Alisaie snorted in satisfaction as she shouldered the bag with our purchases, roundly ignoring my attempt to take the bag myself. "We are not done talking about this," she said, jabbing me in the sternum. Hard.

- - -

Alisaie walked in furious silence for the first half hour, and I'd just about resigned myself to days of the silent treatment when she cleared her throat. "Did you know I'm trans?"

I blinked in surprise, but continued scanning around us - the last thing we needed was to get jumped by bandits or coyotes. "No."

She shrugged. "Most people don't. I don't like to talk about it. People get weird, and I've got better things to do than argue about the shape of my genitals." Her voice was less edged than it had been as she glanced over at me, but still I didn't meet her gaze. "Point is, I've put a lot of thought into 'who I am' and 'what I want'. More than most of the Scions combined, I'd wager. Discounting Urianger, of course."

I couldn't help but look surprised as I glanced over at her. She caught me looking and smiled sweetly.

Alisaie one, Champion of Eorzea zero.

- - -

Dinner was... Well. Not exactly pleasant, although there were pleasant moments - the food was delicious, and Alisaie and Tesleen were good company. It was impossible, however, to forget the inn's purpose as the carers circulated to see to their largely silent charges. And yet, these people were determined to seize whatever small scraps of happiness they could find, no matter the bleak fate in store for them.

After dinner, Tesleen went to settle her charges before bed, leaving Alisaie and I alone.

"Elezen don't hit full growth until their mid to late twenties, you know."

I nodded warily but said nothing.

"There's a Hume convention called the Rule of Seven. Have you heard of it?"

"Vaguely."

"A rule of thumb for determining social acceptability of age difference in relationships. It's said that you shouldn't be with someone who is less than half your age plus seven."

I sighed. "Okay. Where are you going with this?"

"Would you sleep with Thancred?"

I wrinkled my nose in distaste. "Not my type. He's pretty enough, but I'm not into men who brood."

Alisaie huffed impatiently. "If he was your type then, would you?"

"I suppose."

"The Rule of Seven says you shouldn't sleep with him, or any of the other Scions for that matter. And yet, I seriously doubt you'd tell Y'shtola she wasn't old enough to know what she wanted if she ever propositioned you." Alisaie pinned me with a sharp look. "Applying the social standards of shorter lived races to Elezen and Viera doesn't make sense, because past a certain point it all becomes arbitrary anyway."

Unable to find fault in her logic, I shifted uncomfortably and said nothing.

"That's what I thought," she said smugly before getting up to help help Tesleen.

I went for a walk to clear my head.

When I returned, one of the carers directed me to an unused bunk. I hung my coat from the end and sat down to pull off my boots, only to be startled by Alisaie appearing out of the gloom with a stack of blankets. "It gets cold at night. You'll want these"

"Thank you," I said stiffly.

She calmly handed me the blankets. "So what's the magic number? Twenty one? Twenty two? Twenty five?"

"It's not about a number," I said wearily. "It's about experience. Or lack of it, in your case." The last came out more sharply than I'd intended, and Alisaie pursed her lips in displeasure.

She leaned forward, arms crossed. "I've known you a long time, Warrior of Light, and I'm positive that I've had more sexual partners than you," she said, clearly trying to shock me.

It worked. "What... I mean. How--"

She cut me off with another of her edged smiles. "You only sleep with people you have a strong bond with. I, on the other hand, have sucked so. Many. Dicks." She paused for emphasis, fluttered her eyelashes at me, and slowly licked her lips. "And I'm very good at it."

Trying not to think of Alisaie's pretty mouth wrapped around my cock was like not thinking about a pink elephant - utterly impossible once the image had been conjured. I held myself utterly still, trying not to react to the dizzying rush of arousal I felt as my pants suddenly grew far too tight. Unfortunately, my lack of rebuttal only gave her room to press her advantage.

Alisaie held my gaze as she raised a finger to her lips and delicately circled the tip with her tongue before sucking it into her mouth with a soft slurping noise.

Oh Gods oh Gods oh Gods.

My face was on fire. I couldn't breathe, couldn't think of anything but the fantasy of blue eyes on mine as my cock sunk into the wet heat of her mouth.

Alisaie slowly withdrew her finger, then pointedly looked down at the ridge of my erection, which was starkly visible through the pristine white pants I loved wearing with my Red Mage's coat. "Hmm."

Point made, she left me alone for the rest of the night.

- - -

The following morning, Halric escaped.

Tesleen looked stricken when she found out. True, he had so little time left before his condition rendered mercy a necessity, lest he transform and continue the cycle that spawned new sin eaters. And yet, he was a child who deserved to be more than the infection gnawing at his soul, and who deserved a more gentle death than vanishing down the maw of a wild beast, or having what little of him remained consumed by an eater.

Alisaie and I paused only long enough to arm ourselves before joining Tesleen in the search. I went North and East, Alisaie North and West, and Tesleen took the promontory to the South.

Tesleen found him first.

Her cry of fury rang out over the dunes, and I scrambled as fast as I could toward the sound, cursing at the difficulty of running on sand. I crested a rise, made eye contact with Alisaie as she rounded a towering rock formation, and we both arrived just in time to watch the horrible scene unfold without any ability to stop it.

Tesleen had faced off against an enormous eater - a stern, imposing angel in alabaster armor - despite being clearly overmatched. She interposed herself between the creature and Halric as the eater's sword came down, managing to knock the blade aside, but wasn't able to parry the riposte that impaled her.

Alisaie and I stood frozen in horror as the color immediately began to seep from her face like wet paint being washed from a canvas as Tesleen rapidly transformed from a bright, compassionate young woman into a white, winged horror.

The eater lingered to watch its handiwork from a safe height, somehow remaining aloft despite the wing that Tesleen had sliced off, then flew off once the transformation was complete.

Tesleen...

The eater that had once been Tesleen lingered. Horrible, human-sounding noises emerged from its mouth. And then it said Alisaie's name. With a strangled cry, Alisaie darted forward before I could stop her, but Not-Tesleen was already aloft and following after her maker.

Halric was eerily, utterly silent as he watched the retreating eaters.

Alisaie - that brave, fierce woman who abhorred making any show of emotion - collapsed to her knees and wept.

Woodenly, I went to my knees beside her to offer my shoulder. She clung to me, sobbed for half a minute, then stood and mastered herself with grim determination. "We have to get Halric back," she rasped. " We... we have to tell the others."

I nodded, and Alisaie gently took Halric's hand and led him back toward Journey's Head.

I followed mutely behind, sword at the ready, and ached for her suffering, which I realized was a twin to my own. When faced with the evils of the world, we loved too hard, felt too deeply, and subsumed the pain of inevitable loss into helping people.

I wished she had let me hold her longer.

- - -

Alisaie was withdrawn with grief as we started our journey back to the Crystarium. The only sign of spirit she showed were the furious glares she gave me when I attempted to offer comfort.

As we passed the rest of our journey in silence, I couldn't help but miss her attempts at seduction.

Not that I had changed my mind.

- - -

EULMORE

Alisaie sent me to fetch her brother by myself, claiming that she had business to attend to in the Crystarium. So I went alone, hoping that she would find the space she needed to grieve while I was gone. It was good to see Alphinaud alive and well after so many months of worrying, but if I was being honest with myself, his presence only made me feel Alisaie's absence more keenly.

After far too much effort, we finally won our admission to the so-called Final City by successfully convincing a noble couple that Alphinaud was the painter they needed to immortalize their love for the occasion of their anniversary. As I spent most of that first day roaming the city and talking to its inhabitants, I once more wished that Alisaie were with me - keeping her from punching nobles would have made it easier for me not to punch them myself.

That evening I discovered that even a lowly "painter's assistant" rated a private chamber with a bed large enough to sleep five comfortably. Given a choice, I would have taken the austerity of Journey's Head and the pleasure of good company over being subjected to such ludicrous opulence in solitude.

My thoughts inevitably returned to Alisaie as I tried to settle myself for sleep, which summoned the memory of her bragging about her prowess at sucking dicks. My cock slowly stiffened as my traitorous brain replayed the memory of Alisaie suggestively sucking her finger at me over and over again. Finally, knowing that I wouldn't be able to sleep until I'd gotten myself off, I sighed, sat up, and retrieved a vial of lamp oil from my bag. I poured some out onto my hand, before pulling up my nightgown and taking myself in hand.

Since thinking about Alisaie would have been all but admitting defeat, I summoned the thought of Aymeric instead, and the quickie we'd had for old times' sake in his office the last time I'd visited. I held the image of him firmly in mind as I started to stroke myself slowly, forcing myself to crowd out my desire for Alisaie with the memory of Aymeric.

His mouth had been firm and insistent on mine as we'd kissed, kisses that had quickly gone from tender to frenetic. We'd torn each other's clothes off in a frenzy of urgency, and I'd taken him over his desk.

My breathing quickened and my strokes grew faster as I forced myself to recall the encounter in vivid detail. The way he had wriggled impatiently against me as I worked him open with my fingers. The gasp he'd made as I slowly sunk my cock into him. The arch of his back, and his low moan when he'd taken me fully. The demands of his schedule had been too great for seduction or subtlety, but Aymeric had been so needy, so desperate to be fucked that neither of us had minded. I'd gripped his hips tight enough to leave bruises, bruises I knew he'd relish, and he'd thrust back to meet me as I pounded into him.

Gods dammit all, I hadn't gotten quite enough oil.

Impatiently, I poured more onto my hand, getting more than I intended, and resumed my stroking. I tried to remember how it had felt as he'd writhed and moaned underneath me, but the overly-slick sensation of too much oil brought with it the image of a wet mouth engulfing me. My thumb became a tongue flicking across the head of my cock, my tightening grip the pressure of obscene sucking.

I couldn't hold back my release. With my last fragment of will, I told myself that it was black hair, not white, that I pictured falling over ice-blue eyes that looked at me with smug satisfaction.

- - -

LAKELAND

Our business in Eulmore was concluded abruptly and unpleasantly with our forced precipitous departure from the city. And, as is the way of things, our reunion with Alisaie and the Exarch was followed by a series of emergencies too urgent to ignore, culminating with the sin eater attack on Holminster Switch.

It seemed only right that Alisaie was at my side as we rushed to save those we could from the eaters as they swarmed through the village. Tesleen was there, one of many eaters who fell beneath our blades, but Alisaie didn't falter for a moment.

Gods, I was proud of her.

We pressed on, and when the time came I plunged my sword into the Lightwarden's chest, absorbing the light-aspected aether that erupted from it with my Blessing of Light.

And then it was over.

Alisaie had turned away from the others, her shoulders shaking with tears she wouldn't allow anyone to see. I knew I should stay away, that I was too tired and too heart-sore to continue keeping her at arm's length. But given a choice between heartlessness and foolishness, I'll choose foolishness every time.

Her face tipped up toward mine as I folded her into my arms. "Just now, you let me fight at your side and risk my very soul to help you save two worlds. How is it that that's okay, but having sex with me isn't?"

I shook my head and smiled sadly. "You know I don't have an answer to that."

"I've thought long and hard about who I am and what I want," she said, somehow tender and fierce and entreating all at the same time. "My opinions are grounded in a lot of life experience, more than most people get in a lifetime, and I am not easily influenced. And I know that you want me." She paused to wipe away the tears she hadn't been able to stop from spilling over. "And I'm very sad about my friend, so stop being stupid and just kiss me already."

I swallowed, feeling as if I was stepping off the edge of a precipice too high to see what awaited below. "We... I can't make promises."

"I'm not asking for love eternal and a white picket fence. I know that's not who you are, just as it's not who I am. All I'm asking for is right here. Right now. Tomorrow can take care of itself."

"Then I yield to your superior logic," I murmured as I bent to meet her lips.

She tangled her fingers through my hair as she kissed me with unexpected gentleness, and somehow I was the one who melted into her arms.

It was a relief, then, when I surfaced for air and saw her looking as stunned as I felt. That is, until she licked her lips and smiled up at me through half-lidded eyes. "Does that mean I can finally suck your dick?"

"I don't see how I could stop you," I said with a resigned sigh, doing my best to ignore my cock's enthusiastic endorsement of the notion.

"If you're going to be like that, then I don't think I want to after all," Alisaie snapped.

"You're right," I said quickly with a grimace. "That was ungracious of me."

Alisaie's expression shifted from annoyed to calculating. "You do want it then?" she purred, palming the front of my trousers, smirking in triumph when I didn't quite stifle a moan.

Mortified, I looked around for Alphinaud and was glad to see that he was deeply engrossed in a conversation with Lyna and the Exarch. "Yes. Not now, obviously. But yes."

"Of course, but." She smiled sweetly and patted my cheek. "You'll need to say please."

I gently but firmly disengaged, putting several feet between us, and buttoned my heavy Red Mage's coat to hide my now considerable erection. "You, madame. Are a menace," I muttered darkly.

Alisaie winked as she turned to join the others. "Only because you like it."