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"Okay... You know Sydney rushed Gamma, right?

"Well, like when she found out about it, when they told her she was gonna have to be a girl, she came and told me about how they laughed at her and it was all going so bad? I mean, she was passing their stuff, or completing it and all, but it was getting worse and worse and she thought it was personal too.

"It's just that it's been *way* more than just then. And she *wasn't* humiliated, you can see what.... They just wanted to make her feel bad. I think they'd been trying all month, her, special.

"No! I meant, I mean, not how Sydney... how she looked, at the dance... what they *wanted*! They wanted to make her a laughing-stock and her quit, I think, but....

"For the dance... she said she wasn't going to. She didn't want to anymore, after all, go through with it, rush and pledging and all. She said she knew she made a mistake on Gamma anyway, and thought maybe it'd just be better to drop out and rush again next term? But she really didn't want to, even that.

"Why? Because her dad was a stupid frat boy and always on her about how it was the best part of college and his whole life and all and she just thought that... well...

"No... she, she talked about them all the time... what they wanted, what they expected and all.... She always worries she'll never be good enough for them. Her mom, especially.

"Every weekend. She never calls but they always phone.

"They just make me so mad....

"No, I don't mind. Sorry.

"We've been good friends since summer, in July, and I guess I knew about her since our first classes, so... mid-June.

"I meant, I mean, she's kind of obvious most of the time, but I don't think she's felt... free? I mean, like it wasn't okay to experiment and express herself? And coming to school here, she's totally blossomed! I mean, it's like being a big sister and helping my little sister grow up!

"No, not... It wasn't like she was doing anything as... as *overt* as dressing up or makeup or anything, but she was so *open* and, and... like anything I suggested, she was like *so* enthusiastic about? It was fun!

"No, I mean how happy she is!

"Well, encouraging her, more than anything, really... like, she's been growing her hair out and I've been getting Kim - my friend Kimberly is just the *best* hair stylist - she keeps it neat and I've been getting her to slowly let it grow, I mean, a more feminine cut? instead of just a straight trim? And Sydney just loves it.... and it's like... a... *gift* to see her, to see how happy she is with everything.... She won't say it, and we all say it's really a boy cut and we can always find a singer or someone like it, like with hair like hers? but it's like her real *self* is shining?

"Well... I've got her to wear nicer clothes, like softer and more flattering and colors that look better on her, that I'd wear, you know, but are still almost boyish? Things like that? Oh! And I got her ears pierced and she had these *gorgeous* pearl drop earrings at the dance...

"It started before the dance, like I said.

"Okay, Gamma... Trent really, but all of them, they tell her she has to, that she has to go to the dance as a girl and she was *totally* terrified about it, and I think it was because she knew they'd all see her, and know about her, but I knew it was her perfect opportunity, like... it couldn't be *more* perfect... and I think it was that they maybe *already* saw what she was like and were just going with the flow with her and I almost changed my mind about them, but they didn't let up with the other hazing, so I dunno, and I think Trent is most of their problem, but it's just him I've seen, or Sydney's talked about, mostly, so maybe... who knows?

"Could be. En-nee-way, I calmed Sydney down and told her it was *nothing* and that they did it all the time and she was going to just be one of a bunch and she finally said I should just do what we needed. Cool, hunh?

"Well, she's a girl and all, underneath, but she hardly has any... any skills or, maybe, experience... and I asked Mom to help too and we kinda had a few strategy sessions and brought Kim in too 'cause she's already been doing her hair and Mom said we could use some of her display and runway stuff if it fit...

"Yeah. Mom owns a bridal shop, Satin Dreams? on Main? and she goes in bridal and fashion like two or three times a year and has a dozen or so dresses 'specially for them and for the store displays and some for ad photo shoots? And she says she sells them cheaper, after... well, she let us take our pick, so they can't be that expensive, then, or sellable, maybe... but they're still really like new. And Sydney's was from the last ad and *not* a red tag mark-down, lemme tell you!

"Yeah, and Kim did our hair and was a bridesmaid for the show stuff 'cause Mom said we should do that if we wanted to really do Sydney's dress right 'cause she says part of why brides are so beautiful is the ritual stuff, like the procession and unveiling and the white and all the meaning? She says it's almost hard-wired, that brides are beautiful and Sydney should be a real, total *bride* if she wanted to really knock them out. That everyone would see what they wanted to if she was perfect?

"Naw. She... I mean, I only really told Sydney what we were all going to do on Thursday, like the day before? Mom said it was enough time and I already measured her and Mom said the corsets and basques she had would fit her down no matter what and the only thing... well, the dress was no problem, Mom said, and I knew she'd worry, so I didn't tell her until we were home....

"My home. Mom's. I got her to sleep over that Thursday so we could really spend a whole day getting ready and practicing and all and....

"NO! I... she's a *girl*!

"And Mom set up the guest bedroom for her, anyway.

"Look. She's my *girl* friend. My *friend,* who I invited over so we could start the next day early, and she *slept* in the *guest* room, okay? And if I kiss her, it's no different than if I kiss my other friends.

"Look, it's... lots of people have been ragging on me and Kim... and Sydney I bet, and it was nothing like that. Hell, Syd went off with, with... with *Carl*.... and, after the dance! How stupid can people be they can't see her for what s-she... *is*?!

"Alright. Alright.

"Well, around three... Friday... we did her hair, or Kim did, put it up... but Thursday night Mom waxed her, like all over and stuff, and then she musta spent two hours on her face, on and off all day Friday, and her nails and she made her wear an old corset most of the day too so she could get used to it and 'cause she said it'd be tighter, if she was gonna get down enough and she wouldn't let her eat at *all* except these little energy shakes 'cause she said food was bulk and stuff like that. Mom's a total wedding goddess when she's like that and I think even more 'cause it was Sydney.

"Well, I guess... but Syd's been coming over all year and Mom was almost like the first one to notice her, like she said right after the first time she came over that she was so much like a girl.

"Not, not... not, like I said. She just... it's not, not like she seemed... *effeminate* or anything, but... like how she *looks* and... well, she... like, in a dress, like at the dance...? She's *perfect*! She was *born* to be a girl! Practically everyone there saw that, how she was, how she looked... Kim says so too....

"No, Sydney's all shy and she's always... she says she's a boy and everything, but she's.... She still does everything... like *everything* we say.... I mean for the dance, too, but her hair, and what I get her... to wear, like all summer and fall, now. No boy would do that. I mean... and... she's the perfect girl, like my best friend. One.

"No.... I have a boyfriend, sort of.

"He couldn't make it... he was at N.S.U. for the volleyball semis this weekend.

"He wouldn't, anyway, so I wouldn't have asked him. He doesn't like Sydney, or he... he doesn't hang out with us, with the girl stuff and all, I think, but whenever Syd's over.

"Well, Kim got our hair finished about seven, and we did our makeup... then I did Sydney's makeup, and Kim finished her hair... and then Mom'd brought out this complete set of the most perfect lingerie from the shop and she was all mother of the bride over Sydney and almost crying, but when we got her dress on....

"She was *so* beautiful.... Just... so *perfect*.... I wish everyone could have seen her... just....

"Yeah. She was totally nervous, at the beginning, anyway.

"Well... she really just had to walk the, the wedding march, we showed her, and Mom's an expert, really, and Kim and I had the, the procession theater thing down, and she was *so* precious. And the veil was just right, I mean, it was... I know she was pale when we put it on, down over her face, but by when we lifted it she was just *glowing*, all blushing... everyone was like in *awe* of her!

"Okay. Trent. Yeah. Syd was totally afraid of him I think, then, after he pulled this face, like *disgusted* much? I dunno what his problem is, but I'd rather not relive that.

"No, he was about the only one, or like so stupid about it anyway, and Neil...

"No, I mean, they all thought it was legal, even Trent was more about his own head trip than any rules, but Neil, Dee Kay and a couple of the girls' houses were... well, they did it right then for her and shut Trent up.

"Well, after that... I guess we sat down.... Charlene and Joanne and the varsity squad were right there, in uniform and everything.

"I know Char and them from Sigma Tee, and I... well, it's a small campus. I just know them.

"Yeah, we sat there and they were great and Sydney relaxed and then the *boys* started zeroing in on her. And Neil was first to ask her to dance.

"There sure were... I think like half the guys in the hall came over and asked her or were going to. Hey, there were like a half dozen guys at our table in like the first *minute*!

"No, I had to almost twist her arm to get her up, the first time, but it was Neil, and he's Carl's best bud, and isn't that perfect? She already liked him too, I could tell. Neil, I mean.

"Yeah, I'm sure he was, or trying to make her feel better? But he's *such* a prince. And I don't think she sat down more than two songs the whole rest of the evening, after.

"Well, about... over two hours, and I'll bet the last whole half or more was with just Carl, after the contest announcements. And he danced with me too, about ten... ten thirty? before he danced with her, or after their first, maybe, but he just talked about Sydney, about how she looked and her dancing and everything.

"I think he totally fell for her, all escorting her up on stage, and that kiss... and then he went all protector with those jerks and he hit that creep, and after.... He was so totally in love with her, and she... I mean, he must've been the perfect thing for her, how he was....

"They danced with each other all the rest, too, after, you know? And I heard he took her home too.

"Yeah, to get her stuff and bring the dress back, on Saturday.

"No, I never saw them leave. And I wanted her to do the bouquet toss...."

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