My Memory Used to be so Perfect, too...

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I used to have total recall. I'm serious! In a way, I still do, but I don't anymore.

"What the Hell is she talking about?"

Up until the age of 35, I can still to this day recall every day of my life starting from age 3. I can tell you what I had for breakfast on January 16th, 1978. (I had oatmeal and a piece of toast before trudging through the snow with my sister for her to catch bus 35 to go to 1st grade... that evening we had steak for dinner because it was my father's 30th birthday)

"Ok... so what?"

So shortly after I turned 35, all that stopped. I can remember important things after then... the graduation of my boys, my step-father's funeral, etc... but I don't have total recall of those years since turning 35. I guess I just started running out of memory space and my brain started to prioritize. (I mean, why do I have to still remember commercials for companies that haven't been in business since the Carter administration?)

"Um... what's your point?"

I was reading some of my favorite stories here on BCTS and I started to remember a story that I read some time ago, but I couldn't remember where or when, and the details are fuzzy. That tells me that I had to have read it sometime since I turned 35, otherwise I would just be able to recall it perfectly.

"Again... is there a point to all this nattering?"

I'm getting there! Anyway, the story is a Dickensian tale about a child born to poverty as a boy, but later she finds out that her grandfather is still alive and wealthy and crosses the countryside to find him, but ends up falling ill and taken to the home of an old woman who hates men. (she is believed to be a g-girl at first) She stays with the woman a time as a girl and they grow to care for one another, but the girl insists on reaching out to her grandfather. Long story short...

"Too late!"

... ahem! Anyway she ends up back living with the old woman as a girl. Does anyone know what story I'm talking about and who wrote it?

Suggestions as to what it might be would be appreciated!

Comments

I've read it,

just can't think of which story it is, I've read so many stories here.

Why...

RobertaME's picture

Why, thank you, Holly! Thank you so very much!

...

...

You were the type of girl to raise your hand in class to tell the teacher you didn't know the answer, aren't you? ;^)
Seriously, thanks for at least confirming that I'm not crazy and there is such a story. Thing is, I'm not sure it was here that I read it. Might have been lgtales.com or something. Thank you for the comment!

I believe I might know

An Angel without wings, By Susan Brown

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/16594/angel-without-w...

Historical Drama. Impoverished Mother is long gone (dead) & father finally dies leaving his frail ‘son’ alone. He must go to seek his rich grandparents. Comes across and elderly lady that enforces his feminisation, upon his acceptance. Now she, is sent to her grandparents, whom her grandfather attempts her detransition (stripped naked and locked away) with threats of being sent to the america’s via the morning as a slave. & as a boy. Escapes with aid of grandmother, gets back to elderly lady & lives as ‘Roberta’.

Forever Claire By Torey

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/9319/forever-claire

Impoverished child, becomes a gardener for an elderly lady. She lost her daughter years prior & feminises the boy. The mother tends to her son as though a daughter. The father Jealous his son makes more then him tending gardens, dislikes the effeminatenature of his son & the encouragement of his wife. Threatens to force the boy to work a mill, to man him up with threats involving domestic violence. The boy runs off & nearly dies. The mother, and elderly lady agree to fake the boys death & he shall resume a new life, no longer as gardener for her, but as her daughter.

Accidental Mother By Tyrone Slothrope

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/story/124/accidental-momma

Poverty stricken, abused boy flees with baby brother flees ,after abusive mother attempts to drown the baby, in an attempt to blame the boy for ill concieved reasons & effectively ending responsibilities as a mother. He ends up hurt in the genitals & ends up at a retreat for domestically abused women, there he becomes a girl & becomes his brothers underage mother.

A Summer’s odyssey By Jennifer Sue

A Summer's Odyssey eBook : Sue, Jennifer: Amazon.ca: Kindle Store
(Book 1, ALOT longer then the original short version originally submitted at bcts & FM)

A Summer's Odyssey | BigCloset TopShelf (bigclosetr.us)
(continued books 2 & 3+)

Single mother dies of cancer, impoverished. She leaves behind a son & twin girls. The son is set on a mission to travel the country (USA) from cape cod to Maryland itoget him & especially his sisters in search of grandmother. The boy does get ill & is assisted by 2 couples along the way.

I am positive it is 'angel without wings by Susan Brown.

Amelia Rosewood Year two.png

With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!

Erin Amelia Fletcher

Got it in one

RobertaME's picture

It was in fact An Angel Without Wings. Thanks! Now I know I'm not crazy! (well, I'm not crazy in that I was not remembering something that never existed... or something! :^p )

Hunny, your not alone

over the last 3-4 years, I have been having memory problems too. I am 32. Dissassociative fogue & dissassociative amnesia, amung other things. Complex PTSD and what not. Yes it is mainly caused by my being severaly abused majority of my life. I once had a tremendous memory, much like yourself, heck I still remember being born, sure many will claim that is my imagination, but I know I remember it. I used to remember the littleist things with dates etc..... maybe its cause these days every bloody day blends and meshes together I can no longer keep anything straight. I too often, have issues related to knowing I know a story, remebering glimpses but author and title seem gone. check my blogs if u do not believe me in the past couple years or so I have asked for locational help about them too. If it exists to you, it exists. Who knows maybe its from your alter ego, having a joint memory & from the parellel universe of them you are remebering. Weird sure, but who knows. You would be surprised the things I just know with glimpses of a time wayyyyyyyyyyyyy before I was born in this life. Like how else can one explain, how they know basket weaving or whatnot without ever having a lesson, I actually write usually freestyle with dipping quills. I do know I am a little nuts hun, certifiably so. So your not alone <3

Amelia Rosewood Year two.png

With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!

Erin Amelia Fletcher

If you're nuts...

RobertaME's picture

...then I'm a barrel full! I've dreamed decades of a life I've never lived and explained it using quantum entanglement... but I think we're both beautiful people, so there's that!

Thank you again for helping me prove to myself that I'm not crazy and still remember some things that I've done in the last 13 years. :^Þ

You are both extraordinary

leeanna19's picture

You are both extraordinary people. I can recall things from when I was 2 or 3. Friends think that is odd. Now I can't remember what I ate a few days ago.

Do you ever drive a familiar route, then when you arrive you don't remember driving it? It's scary.
I think that is your brain saying "seen all this, won't bother to remember it.."

It's like when you take a different route home, it seems to take a lot longer , but when you look at the clock it is in fact quicker!

Our perception of time alters, as you brain is taking everything in, your memory is recording it all because it's different.

My memory is getting worse as I get older, it's worrying. To a large extent we are our memory.

How the hell did you find all those stories? Memory or good at searching?

cs7.jpg
Leeanna

well, if you must know

I have been an active reader & at as time writer, here at bcts. I have read many stories. When I get hooked to enough stories to a specific writer I tend to read the lot. There are so many stories that I have read but completely forget the author and or title & the meager information is not enough that search can help. From what I have noticed, some writers tend to come and go, some leave their work, some do not. some whom have passed, their work is still here, others it was removed.
I knew some of those stories because I have been reread them alot, like alot~alot.
What I did was I listened/read & I could recall a few that had those details or within the scope of things. certain matching demographics, if u will.

I am also good at searching, lotta people come to me to find stuff out for them. Single mothers etc. some remarked I should be PI, or so. Na not my cuppa, I could likely write a extremly long list of what I have read in the past 2 years & reread at that. Much of them are kindle. I was without internet for awhile, so it is what that is.

So you were right on the money on both accounts luv

Amelia Rosewood Year two.png

With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!

Erin Amelia Fletcher