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Yesterday I had to say goodbye to my little tuxedo princess kitty, ripping a hole from my heart. She had been with us for over twenty years, a kitten acquired from a shelter to give to my daughter when her illness unfortunately re-occurred. The poor little thing eventually became 'my' kitty, latching herself to me and needing me in her sight at all times possible, even crying out if she woke up to find I'd moved to a different room. But her advanced age finally caught up to her beyond what could be treated and we had to let her go.
She was the sweetest tiny thing, barely 5lbs soaking wet, wanting lap snugs and rest-on-your-chest cuddles when you'd be lying down. For many many years she has always been there in the morning before I got up for her ten minutes of love, and the same in the evening after herding me to bed at the appropriate time for when the lights were supposed to be turned off. So much of my daily routines have revolved around this little girl, getting her the meds she needed as soon as I'd get home from work, escorting her to her food bowl multiple times a day (and night!) to stand as defender from our other cat who wanted to pounce and play - even when he'd be locked out of the room she needed her security guard to feel 'safe'. Plus all the cleaning up after her over these past few twilight years when the trip to the litter box was too far away after waking up from a sound sleep on her cozy towel and heating pad. Now I'm looking around the cleaned-up room which we shared and feel lost. It's just empty without the tremendous light given by such a small bundle of fluff.
All she wanted was to love and be loved, curling up either on me or next to me on the side chair while I'd be writing or wasting time on the internet. She was adored and will be forever remembered and loved.
Goodbye baby girl, I miss you terribly already. But I hope your spirit is happy to once again be in my daughter's arms and to be running and playing with your big floof of a brother whom we both mourned together all those years ago. You were my comfort and I yours through so much, a piece of my heart is forevermore yours.
Erisian
Comments
I am so sorry for your loss
huggles
*Sniff*
People who are not cat people just don't understand, they can be amazing, at least as good as or better than a lot of dogs.
I know that and share your kind of loss, as when a another little soul comes along and of their volition just chooses to love you unconditionally, it is humbling, it is scary and it can be beyond ones' comprehension.
It is the polar opposite of the political cynicism of so many of our citizenry in the U.S. where it is always about 'me me me' and everybody is entitled and under the delusion that something has been 'taken from them'. And that since that is the case let me grab what money I can get while the getting is good.
Our pets keep us grounded in what is reality, in what is truly what we need and in these troubled times their comfort is even more essential.
There are more cats like her out there fortunately, I sincerely hope you find another soul who needs you as much as you need it.
Sorry
So sorry for your loss. Pets, whether cats or dogs, get ingrained into lives and when they are gone, we miss them deeply.
Grieving with you
I have had cats for all of my life, and know well how you never forget them after you lose them. Heaven is where they will be waiting for you - and it will be a heaven even if otherwise full with fire and brimstone. The love that a cat can give trumps that.
And don't forget - somewhere a kitten hopes that you will find them, and take and love them - and get their love in return.
I feel you
I've loved and lost 6 kitties over the years; the one who had FIP and died in my arms, the 17yo who I gave insulin for the last 7 years of her life... I've got the stories and internal scars for each of them. Perhaps I'm more than a bit odd, but each of them now rests on my dresser, and in my heart, and I would not trade a day for all of the many happy memories.
Hugs,
Steve
Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
Author unknown...
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
Thinking of You
People who have never had cats do not understand they are children who age and get old, but all their life they are our feline children and when the day comes and we have to help them on the way to that next world to stop their suffering. It hurts, it leaves a burning hole in your heart, an emptiness.
I lost my two, Kimi, 19, last year and Snowy, 18, the year before. They were brother and sister, born six months apart. I still miss them everyday. You Tube helps, to see and hear a happy purring bundle of fur. To see new young life.
You are in my thoughts Erisian.
Sophie
Condolences
I’m sorry for your loss
hugs :)
Michelle SidheElf Amaianna
right in the broken heart
I truly feel for you. I had little choice but to have my pepper put down not long ago. I got up one morning to find her hiding in basement looking for a place to die. Ripped my heart in two.
I didn't want another cat. Having one was good enough I thought.
But fate intervened when a mother cat abandoned two of her babies under my front step.
Little willow is not so little anymore. Still wants to know where I am and keeps trying to breast feed on my pillow when I lay down to read, cuddled up against my breasts.
I found him crying in my backyard, barely two weeks old ,for his missing momma. His brother Ash was also rescued by me but unfortunately where he was placed he ran out and got run over by a car.
His mother still shows up now and again, as for his other two litter mates I have no idea.
I have two cat collars I will never use again. They are from Kitty and Pepper. Maybe one day I can stop crying and bury them. They will never leave my heart and never replaced. I just open my heart to a new kitten when I can.
Hugs.
May all beings ...
May all beings be happy.
May all beings be healthy.
May all beings be free from fear and pain.
And may all beings be Loved,
in this World and in the Next.
---
I've asked my Domino Kitty (and all my others) to find and welcome everyone's 'newcomers'.