Author:
No really, loosing my mind. It's the little things we do when we truly shouldn't do them. A friend offered me a puppy only three weeks old. And I brought it home. Puppies chew everything in sight and a lot of things that aren't in sight. All those things lost under the couch, under the bed, behind the record cabinets? They ain't lost no more. Puppy is now eight weeks old and bigger than some grown dogs I had. You've heard the comment "human garbage disposal"? I have a dog garbage disposal. At full growth this "puppy" will weigh between 95 to 139 lbs. front shoulders will be four to four and one half feet tall.
I said I was losing my mind. Wait, that isn't the whole story. I bought some goats this week. I have no business herding goats. I don't know a single thing about goats. Cows and horses yes but goats? My friend told me they were the strangest sheep she ever did see. For the past two years I've been mentioning getting some sheep to mow the grass. Told her they were wilderness sheep, very rare, and highly prized by sheep rustlers so I didn't want her to mention anything about the sheep I mow owned.
Truly losing my mind. Back in the dark ages I passed the point of owing clothes needing ironed. Lately those clothes have been trickling back into my closet. The denim jacket is cute but it needs an iron to get the wrinkles out after washing, drying. Ordered it four weeks ago. Had a weak moment when I saw it. The satin blouse? Received several compliments since I have been wearing it but it needs either a light sprinkle and iron or steam iron it. I must have been drunk when I ordered it. Funny I don't drink. The silk blouse? I plead the fifth. Honestly I needed it to round out the frontier dress and jacket I'm still trying to find. Silk is so soft and it desires a soft caress from an iron.
No one has to think how sexy the Chinese women look in the long silk dresses. Had no idea what was in the three inch by three inch envelope when I picked up the mail last week. Once I removed it from the envelope it kept unfolding, unfolding, unfolding..., you get the idea. Red silk dress. I now know why those Chinese women look so sexy. It's only an illusion between their body and the world. Definitely not wearing that dress out in public. No longer have the figure to do it justice.
Some of the writers are jealous of the wide range of clothes a woman can wear at almost any given event or for any reason. From the other side is the reality every single extra pound shows up when a woman is wearing a dress. My best weight is 135 lbs. right now I tip the scale at 149 lbs. There are a couple dresses in my closet I don't-can't wear because those extra pounds would be the focal point. Guys may appreciate a good figure but they have no idea how hard it is to maintain that. They can carry an extra twenty or thirty pounds well hidden by a shirt and pants.
And I do this because my mind says girl? Maybe a lobotomy wouldn't be that bad. I'm already insane. I so want to do that Red silk dress justice. The frontier ensemble also demands I lose those lbs. I lost my mind.
Hugs people, I pray each of you understand and appreciate what you have.
Barb
Life is meant to be lived, not worn until it's worn out.
Comments
My Dear
What you have is an advanced case of "aspirations."
Aspirations are just fine unless they are accompanied by "grim determination."
For example, you aspire to have a goat. Then your grim determination demands that having a goat produces a positive outcome.
Or, you find the perfect dress. Your aspirations convince you to buy it. Then your grim determination tells you to only wear it if you look perfect in it. Trouble is unless you're 34 - 24 - 34 you are not perfect.
The solution is to come down with a dose of Idontgivearatsass.
This is especially handy to have when someone wants to talk about the latest nonsense out of Washington.
People with Idontgivearatsass do Not own irons. They live longer and get along better with just about everyone.
And - they love dogs, especially dogs that you can ride.
Giddyup, Barbie.
Love,
Jill
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
You ain't fooling me, Jill
She wants to borrow the red silk dress after I have "borrowed" so many of her dresses. I swear I returned all of them. Ain't my fault she can't find them. Nothing wrong with aspirations if one balances them with inspirations. I'm inspired to lose those extra pounds no matter how painful it may be. Did it to myself two years ago. I gave up soft drinks (Dr Pepper) for Gatoraid thinking the electrolytes would be good. Has anyone paid any attention to how much sugar is loaded into that stuff? Finally read the label and poured out the last of the Gatoraid.
Jill, sweety, if you loan me that metalic blue dress you wore to the Heritage stockholders meeting last week, I'll think about loaning you my red dress.
Hugs Jill
Barb
When life hands you lemons, give them back. It's a trick.
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
Gatoraid?????
I thought that was like Farmaid---a benefit concert for homeless, disadvantaged Alligators!!!
Does make me wonder though if that's what all those athletes were on about when they praised the stuff though. Seemed a bit oblique as a way to help aquatic reptiles.
Sigh... Of ALL the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Catherine Linda Michel
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.
Mind
I feel as if I've been losing my mind for some years. One hopeful thing is that the things happening aren't really any different from those when I was much younger. But I don't know about the frequency.
I thought of replying with a nasty, sassy joke, but I decided against it.
-- Daphne Xu
Yep, yer losing it Daphne
"I thought of replying with a nasty, sassy joke, but I decided against it." It's an indicator of loss of memory as it never stopped you before. One of the other indicators is when we look in the mirror and find a gray hair(s). Each one is attached to a no longer functioning mind node. Using more hair color doesn't rejuvenate the node. It's a lie foster on women by the Cosmetic Industry. Government black ops is a wannabe operation compared to the cosmetic industry capitalists.
Hugs Daphne
Barb
Life is meant to be lived, not worn until it's worn out.
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
You're Tough.
Okay Barb, you're tough. You can handle it.
If you're loosing your mind, perhaps you should tighten it back up. It might require a mind-screw. Or maybe a mind screwdriver.
A "no longer functioning mind node"? You mean like a dead neuron?
-- Daphne Xu
Funny thing about ironing
Most men can't tell the difference between something that has been ironed and something that hasn't. That's why most men don't bother (and it shows).
Most women can tell the difference; that's because their skin is much more sensitive. Mine is too, but for other reasons. If I was to put on an un-ironed tee shirt it would feel like wearing sandpaper. In fact, after a bath my skin is so sensitive I can only wear about half what is in the male side of my wardrobe - and about three-quarters of the other side.
Ironing, despite the effort required, is an important process for most clothes that have been washed. The heat in the water causes the fibres to tighten up and shrink as the material dries. Ironing allows those same fibres to relax and then dry straightened out, giving a much smoother finish - and, by the way, making the garment just that little bit larger and looser.
Penny
Is that so?
In my family the only thing that's ever gotten ironed was Sunday-go-to-meetin' clothes, so I wouldn't know about the change to fit and materials. Of course, even your Sunday best is usually going to be some nice jeans, or your one pair of slacks, with a nice blouse or shirt depending. The only women who wear dresses to church any more are either the hoity-toities or the old biddies, and in neither case would I usually be willing to be caught dead in the stuff they're wearin'.
Ironing tee shirts seems like a lot of work for somethin' that's supposed to be simple, and let's be honest: jeans with creases in them? That's just tacky.
Melanie E.
Thanks Penny
Ironed clothes do feel better next to the body but I never realized why until you explained it. In our rush to wash and wear society lost a little class and most of us never realized it.
Hugs Penny
Barb
When we finally know everything we realize we know nothing
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
Upscale
Y'all need to upscale your clothing purchases a bit. Women's tees and tops are generally made with better fabric and use a finer weave. Women's tees in particular are far superior to the same items made for men.
I do a lot of my shopping at a local quality thrift store. I can walk out of there with a armload of tops and blouses paying only about 20% of what they would have cost new. If I need an upscale dress I check out the consignment stores. Not that I need to most of the time. For regular daily wear I can get "designer" jeans for about 10 cents on the dollar.
I'm lucky, this is a university town so many girls donate all their clothes instead of hauling them home at the end of spring semester. Alot of it still has the store tags! There are alot of great deals out there, pick the stuff made of fabric that needs little to no ironing* and you are home free!
* I just love it when the care tag says "Do Not Dry Clean Do Not Iron Hang Dry". This girl is in heaven!
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
Yes and No
:)
I have my suspicions about many of the labels found in clothing. In fact, I suspect that for many cheap lines they go by the "bin" principle: You need a label for an item you just sewed, grab a random one out of the bin beside your sewing station. Doesn't matter what it is, you can't read that language anyway, and how important can it be?
For other labels, I can see the fine hand of a company lawyer who doesn't want his client's firm to be sued for ruining something by giving instructions that could be misread. Hence, don't do anything much to the clothes. I have seen plain cotton tee shirts which boldly state, "dry clean only". Idiots.
Almost any clothing can be improved by ironing whatever the label says. The exceptions to this are certain artificial fibres which will melt in anything warmer than strong sunlight. You'll soon learn the safe temperature to use, and you'll also appreciate the difference an iron can make to almost any garment.
Penny
It's not lost!
When I read this, I called Jill and she went to check to make sure that it was still locked safety away where we had hidden it from the world so many years ago.
So Barb, it's not lost, and the world is still safe from it :)
We the willing, led by the unsure. Have been doing so much with so little for so long,
We are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
Thanks Nuuan, you can't borrow the red silk dress
I knew I could count on you to keep my lost and found items safe. By the way sweetheart, i did slip on the red dress today, and it fit. Because you have been so nasty to me not loaning me your tan sequined pantsuit you wore to the CMA I'm not loaning you the red dress.
Hugs Nuuan
Barb
By the time we figure out life, it's over.
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
Remember what Mark Twain said.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
Timing
I read this thread just as I had been reading the beginning of a book about German cultural activities in China before WW II. Among the plethora of German associations there was in the German quasi-colony of Qingdao (Tsingtao for beer drinkers) "Deutscher Ziegenzuchtverband", i.e. the German association of goat breeders. Among other things they arranged goat beauty contests. Sadly this came to an end when the Japanese attacked in 1914.
So that's the puppy you claim ate the dress you "borrowed" from me. I still think it's more of a case of "my dog ate my homework".
I was going to suggest that you can't lose what you never had but Nuuan put me straight. It's good to know that Jill is your mindminder.
Bru my Pretty
Need I go back to all the times I asked to borrow one of those exquisite dresses you wore to close down some gentleman's mind while you finagled their deepest darkest secrets from them? And you responded, you gave it to charity, you left it behind rather than packing it, the cleaners lost it, it was a gift from some (every big name in the industry here) and you couldn't possibly loan it out, or you had wine spilled on it and the stain didn't come out? Your excuses were as plentiful as all those dresses you seem to have an endless supply of. Even if I don't have your figure, there were a few I wouldn't have stretched out of shape if I wore them.
I'm rethinking this GF thing.
Hugs Bru
Barb
Life is a challenge, don't back down or give up.
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
"It's good to know that Jill is your mindminder."
Bru I know you can remember the chaos that ensued the last time Barb's mind was set loose?
Barb even agreed that we had to lock it away for everyone's safety, although she can't remember as that is part of what got locked away. It came down between Jill or I keeping it safe and Jill was really the only choice since we all know I would have let it loose occasionally just for laughs :)
We the willing, led by the unsure. Have been doing so much with so little for so long,
We are now qualified to do anything with nothing.