by Kristine Roland
The Adventures of Kelly Anderson
YOU don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of Jason's Story; but that ain't no matter. That book was made by Ms. Kristine Roland, and she told the truth, mainly. There was things which she stretched, but mainly she told the truth. That is nothing. I never seen anybody but lied one time or another, without it was Aunt Sarah, or Michele, or maybe Julie. Aunt Sarah–my Aunt Sarah, she is–and Julie, and Michele is all told about in that book, which is mostly a true book, with some stretchers, as I said before.
Now the way that the book winds up is this: Jason (that was me) found my true self that had hidden in the cave of my mind, and the knowledge set me free. Dr. Daniels he took it and gave me the medicines to take all the year round --- more than a body could tell what to do with. Momma took me for her daughter, and allowed she would sivilize me; but it was rough living in my old boys room all the time, and when I couldn't stand it no longer I lit out. I got into my best dress and my cutest shoes, and was free and satisfied. But Kathy she hunted me up and said she was going to start a band of mall shoppers, and I might join if I would go back to Momma and be respectable. So I went back…
Kelly rolled over in her bed, and woke up. She looked around her freshly painted room, and took in the new curtains and bedspread. She picked up her copy of The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, and said to herself, "Ok, no more eating spicy food before bed, and then reading myself to sleep, and who the hell is Kristine Roland?"
Author's Note:
My apologies to Mr. Mark Twain, who is without a doubt my favorite author. I could not resist posting this bit of silliness in honor of Mr. Twain's upcoming birthday on November 30th. I will be continuing Kelly's story soon.
Kristy
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Comments
Omg Omg Omg Omg Omg Omg Omg YAY
I love You "Ms. Kristine Roland" :)
You do like Mark Twain
I recoginzed the Huck Finn style language right away.
Cute.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
Oh, this was cute. Had me
Oh, this was cute. Had me going for a bit too.
Nice interlude.
----------------------------
May the Stars light your path.
Joy
Cute
That's a short, cute piece -- about 12 feet deep too.
Thanks, Kristy. :)
- Terry
Cute - I wonder how many others will catch your pun?
Terry,
I got it... but I wonder how many others will.
Hugs,
Kristy
your pun is all wet!
Or at least that's how it sounds...
But mark my words, many here will get it :)
Cute little parodic exercise, Kristine.
~~~hugs, Laika
Well shit, I guess it really CAN happen here..,
.
I did but ...
... only once you'd pointed out that there was a piece of word-play. I'd forgotten where Sam Clements acquired his nom-de-plume. I don't think I've read Huck Finn for well over 40 years so the details are a bit vague in my head. I do have a hardback copy somewhere (as well as Tom Sawyer) which have some rather nice coloured ink drawings. I don't usually like illustrated stories but these are sufficiently vague as not to impose themselves on the reader's imagination.
Geoff
It is also available in Project Gutenberg
See: http://www.gutenberg.org/files/76/76-h/76-h.htm for an illustrated version. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn are in the public domain.
Laika, Thanks... I had no choice, I wasn't going to get this out of my head and be able to concentrate on the real sequel until I got it written, it just kept coming back to this beginning. Now that I have it out there, I will be able to settle down to write the sequel.
Hugs,
Kristy
Sorry, your pun was ...
all in Twain.
Mark Twain or twelve feet of water, *deep water* and relative safety for the fragile wooden hulls of those early riverboats. Mind you lots of them burned or blew up in the early years, quite a few on the Great Lakes as well as rivers.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa
Thank yo ...
from another Mark Twain afficianado.
One of the most difficult things to give away is kindness.
It usually comes back to you.
Holly
It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice.
Holly
Openers
Love that opening. I started a Tuck fanfic that way several years back (from the POV of brother Brian's friend Tim), but the fragment's been sitting in may computer forever:
You don't know me, without you have read something by the name of 'The Tuck Saga' but that ain't no matter. That was made by Ms. Ellen Hayes, and she told the truth mainly. There were things which she stretched, but mainly she told the truth. (Hey, after my eighth grade English teacher decided to defy the state school board by assigning our class 'Huckleberry Finn', I ought to have _something_ to show for it.)
Truth is, though, since Ms. Hayes only mentioned me about twice in the whole story, it's a good bet that you don't know me, anyway...
Not that the story was ever going to be completed anyway -- its point was to put in some good words for Brian, and Ellen subsequently took care of that in ways that I couldn't. But I'm a little amused that my backstory for Tim is still intact -- that he was a year ahead of Brian and districted for Red Bluff High rather than McAllen, so that they'd no longer be soccer teammates and never again go to school together, making the Tucker family camping trip essentially their last hurrah. Though Ellen has provided Brian with some more friends and classmates since that time, Tim hasn't been mentioned among them.
Way off the subject here -- sorry. Kudos to you for actually making a story out of the thing...
Eric